[conformità]

ive come to a point where i feel nothing for no one, no love no hate, no nothing in between life is nothing, nothing bothers me or affects me, iam not happy,sad or anything in between, but why?

 

[Psilocin]

Why aren't you asking a doctor about this?

Btw, sounds like depersonalization disorder.

 

[conformità]

Why aren't you asking a doctor about this?

Btw, sounds like depersonalization disorder.

becauze i cant understand why i feel this way

 

[Psilocin]

Yeah. That's why you ask a doctor.
They'll be a weebit more informed than a forum and, if they don't know, they'll refer you to a specialist.

In all honesty, nobody will be able to tell you WHY you're feeling like that, other than yourself. They're YOUR feelings after all.

 

[negativnein]

When I was about 16 I had exactly the same problem. Like you seem to be doing now, I focused more on the question 'why?' but I also neglected to find productive ways to improve my situation. It was quite hard to tell if the answers gained from such introspection were actually the right ones and so looking back, this resulted in quite a few wasted years when I could have been seeking professional help. While pondering about the possible causes might be a more interesting way to approach this matter, it is essentially useless without concrete action or when done alone. One might even consider this an elaborate way of not dealing with this kind of problem. So yes...

...ask a doctor.

Of course, this advice only counts if your numbness has been lasting for a longer period than a few days or weeks.

 

[lovecraftianbeatles]

That one feeling is not enough for any one of us to determine what may or may not be causing your feelings of numbness to everything. You really need to go see a doctor because it could be any number of things at this point.

 

[Neon Knight]

I've asked professionals about my own emotional numbness and got nothing. It takes a lot to get me to emote anything but it's usually brought out by said professional. Other than that anger seems to be my main function at the moment if I feel anything, but it's not intense like it used to be but it's still there. I was wondering if I put a wall up or if this is some sort of defence mechanism and I get nothing. I used to feel I had Boderline PD but now I feel more like Avoidant PD but until I get through what I am right now I'll not know, I do feel Borderline isn't it though any more. I wouldn't jump on the personality disorder thing though right away, sometimes it's just depression, at least I'm told that a lot.

 

[Outcode]

I feel that way sometimes, sometimes I want to feel that way. Maybe it's so that I won't get hurt/offended by myself or others.

 

[waterviolet]

I think at some point our emotions need to take a break. I've been thru it also, it's a time where I draw strongly into myself. Think of it as a "pause" button moment...use it as a time to re-set and re-think plans, goals, things that are important to you. When I feel another wave of numbness coming around that's when I remind myself to simplify my life, focus back on the things that mean something to ME. It seems we lose ourselves in the desires of other people and when that happens, our subconcious fights back and the result is numbness and withdrawl. At some point you will want to push the "play" button and move on with new things that interest and drive you. But when you do....it will be on your terms!

 

[Neon Knight]

No one gave me that answer when I asked and now finally it all makes sense, thank you. :happy: That sounds exactly like what I am doing now, which would probably explain the lift in my mood these days. It's all about me now and I'm not ashamed about it any more. :crazy: You're right it's a good time to focus on yourself and figure out what you want, especially if you've been letting others guide you or affect you a little too much. I'm figuring out what I want right now and I'm making plans to do it all if I can, I was talking about that today to someone that I gotta do what makes me happy I can exist the way a lot of people do, just plodding along through life doing what they have to not what they actually want to. I've done that and it makes me miserable and miserable to be around I'm sure. If I'm ever to get out of this depression I have to take care of myself first, then what comes will after that. I'm just lucky I'm in a position to do all that right now and I do appreciate the opportunity very much :happy: I'm not sure I want to go back to the over feeling way, I'd like to stay this way, in control of myself and making rational decisions not emotional which ended up more often than not, stupid ones.

 

[Angel1412kaitou]

I've been feeling that way since 2 years ago. :| Please get some help from a professional, I would if my parents would consent, lol.

 

[Neon Knight]

Have you not asked or they've denied it to you?

 

[Angel1412kaitou]

They denied, lol. Not much i can do at this point, so I'll just deal with it until college.

 

[Neon Knight]

Oh wow! I had that problem too. They made me go to a school psychologist to see why I listened to the music I did and why I liked to draw the things I was (copying record covers), but when I actually did need help I was ignored and kind of mocked for thinking I needed medical help because I knew at that time something was very wrong. Can you get a referral from your family doctor? You really shouldn't have to wait for something like that. Maybe even a school psychologist, you can tell them you don't consent to having your parents find out because they've denied you the help you want and feel you need.

 

[Angel1412kaitou]

Oh wow! I had that problem too. They made me go to a school psychologist to see why I listened to the music I did and why I liked to draw the things I was (copying record covers), but when I actually did need help I was ignored and kind of mocked for thinking I needed medical help because I knew at that time something was very wrong. Can you get a referral from your family doctor? You really shouldn't have to wait for something like that. Maybe even a school psychologist, you can tell them you don't consent to having your parents find out because they've denied you the help you want and feel you need.

Going through the unraveling of your mind is very tough to handle, I'm sorry you had to go through that. You are a wonderful being and I hope you feel better now. You most definitely deserve it, and if you ever need support I'm here. I'm sorry your family was unsupportive... Lol, my parents don't believe in psychology, anyone who seems different is automatically dismissed as "Crazy" and shouldn't be a priority. And then they had me! XD Lol. And yeah, I'm not sure if I could take initiative, I don't like to talk to people I don't know. I'm going to feel extremely nervous. But thank you very much. ^^

 

[Neon Knight]

Thanks for the kind words, same goes for you if you need to chat about stuff. You sound a lot like me, hope that doesn't scare you now lol :tongue: It took me a while to be able to talk about stuff, even now I'm just letting out stuff I never ever wanted to and now I am because after all these years I'm ready. If you feel out of control ever, that's when you really should try to take initiative, because from my experience, teachers don't care or notice that sort of thing. They just thought I didn't care about school and should be working harder. But that was in a time when things like depression were not talked about like they are now, but I rally doubt teachers have the skill necessary to know the difference, they'd have to take psychology or something similar that maybe they do have now. I hope they have that sort of thing now since it seems to be a big issue these days.

 

[Psilocin]

I've had the same issue.
Funny thing is, I have the same Enneagram trifix as you, but my 9w1 is my center: 7w6-9w1-4w3; however I have a Sx/So stacking.

Here's what I did:
I paid attention to stress factors in my life and WHEN I dissociated. For me, it was my place of employment.
Look for your triggers.
I decided to go ahead and "Break through the void" when I started dissociating. I made myself feel the unpleasant feelings that numbness was covering up.
Yeah, it fucking blew.
But I did a lot of housework, I can say that.

 

[Neon Knight]

Holy crap! My 4 wing is 3 too and 9 wing is 1 too. I like your monikor and sig btw

My emotions used to be way out of control so it's kind of a blessing to be this way now for me. How did you dissociate? I was talking about that to my counsellor today. I tend to go inside myself into thought or fantasy sort of to where if you're talking to me I hear absolutely nothing and you have to repeat when I eventually come back. I used to do it on purpose to kill boredom but for a long while now it just happens spontaneously. That's one reason I thought I had ADD Inattentive type. My panic and anxiety attacks had triggers I had to figure out, luckily I did, and it seems like they're in remission since then. Plus I had to go over those triggers with my psych and I've made a lot of progress considering this was only 2 years ago and a doctor at the time (before I knew what was going on) said that I seemed to be paralysed by anxiety. I agree, it was so painful to have to find and deal with those triggers but I'm glad I did, who knows what I'd be like now. I'm completely off anxiety meds now for about a year maybe, which I was really scared to stop at first but eventually felt I didn't need them any more and stopped without problems. Now I'm just dealing with depression (just, I say, lol). Oh and I also had a challenge when I was so bad, there was an event I really wanted to attend and it required every bit of courage I had. I got through it with a few hitches that surprisingly didn't set me off into panic, that was a hurdle I also needed to go through. I can safely say that is one day I'll probably never ever forget, save for possibly future brain damage or alzheimer's :tongue: and totally worth it. I had lots of help through it all too, which is very very important. I think if I had the courage to deal with the issues that became triggers for panic, it would have never got to that point. That's why I think it's good to deal with it as soon as you're able to. You can't force yourself but when you think it might be possible that's a good time to start, because it seems to be that way, or at least it was for me.

 

[Conscience]

I feel exactly what you feel.
it's scary.

 

[Neon Knight]

I'm actually kind of relieved in a weird way that I'm not the only one feeling like this like I'm sure many of you are.