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I wish I could just be free and not be restrained by my need to think about and formulate opinions on everything all the time. I'm a musician, that's where all my talent and passion is - if I had developed a different personality I could actually be releasing records and touring right now, but instead I'm probably going to end up turning my back on the only thing i've ever really been good at, in order to actually get on in life. I feel as though all my thoughts are just wasted energy that should be going into proper practical interraction with the world and other people. Other people get along fine without being as caught up in their own thoughts as us, why do we need to expend all this extra mental energy for what seems like less benefit in the long run?

If I was an aspiring scientist or programmer or business man or something i'd probably find my personality to be a huge help but I can't stand the rigidity of working with facts and figures or dedicating my life to just making as much profit as possible. People expect musicians to be extrovert showoffs who are always 'in the moment' and either willing to entertain or desiring of an audience to air thier emotions and issues to. I take my music as such a personal thing that it becomes really hard to actually perform anything sincere to anyone. I physically shake when i play people recordings of me. I desperately want to train to be a lead vocalist, but I really can't imagine an INTP dominating the stage and captivating the audience. I'm also terrible at networking with people and making connections, it takes me a long time to get to know people enough to trust them with something as personal as my songs - the idea of telling someone who is essentially a stranger, that it's worth thier time to listen to something i've done is ... well the idea of it is kind of upsetting me now actually.

I can't see myself ever being happy doing something that isn't music-related, i don't really give a fuck about much else. I find relief and liberation in music, it flows organically, it touches people, effects thier emotions and thier thoughts. I just wish my personality matched my skills and my desires. Most people think i'm a writer or business man or a webdesigner or something when I ask them to guess what I do.

Thanks for reading my self-indulgent whining, sorry for taking up your time. If anyone has any advice, i'd love to hear it please.
 

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If I was an aspiring scientist or programmer or business man or something i'd probably find my personality to be a huge help but I can't stand the rigidity of working with facts and figures or dedicating my life to just making as much profit as possible. People expect musicians to be extrovert showoffs who are always 'in the moment' and either willing to entertain or desiring of an audience to air thier emotions and issues to. I take my music as such a personal thing that it becomes really hard to actually perform anything sincere to anyone. I physically shake when i play people recordings of me. I desperately want to train to be a lead vocalist, but I really can't imagine an INTP dominating the stage and captivating the audience. I'm also terrible at networking with people and making connections, it takes me a long time to get to know people enough to trust them with something as personal as my songs - the idea of telling someone who is essentially a stranger, that it's worth thier time to listen to something i've done is ... well the idea of it is kind of upsetting me now actually.
Ever hear of a guy called Maynard James Keenan? He's in a alright band...

Quote from Wikipedia:
"Keenan's lyrics on Ænima and Lateralus focused on philosophy and spirituality—specific subjects range from organized religion in "Opiate", to evolution and Jungian psychology in "Forty-Six & 2" and transcendence in "Lateralus."

I'd call that INTish...
.
Quote from Wikipedia:
"Since rising to fame, Keenan has been a noted recluse, although he does emerge to support charitable causes."



Stage presence?

Quoted from Wikipedia:
"In live performances with Tool, Keenan has often been known to be situated on a platform towards the rear of the stage, without a spotlight, facing the backdrop rather than the audience. Breckinridge Haggerty, the band's live video director, says that the dark spaces on stage "are mostly for Maynard". He explains, "a lot of the songs are a personal journey for him and he has a hard time with the glare of the lights when he’s trying to reproduce these emotions for the audience. He needs a bit of personal space, and he feels more comfortable in the shadows."

"His appearance with Tool has included the Mohawk hairstyle, wigs, Kabuki masks, bras, tights, and his entire body in blue paint. This is contrasted with a variety of long haired wigs while performing with or promoting A Perfect Circle. His posture on stage is usually bent."

Or in other words, he dresses like an idiot to spite people looking for image. Check out his live performances on line, you'll see what I mean.
 
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I wish I could help but I can only relate to some aspects. We intps love to spend all our time fearing for an unknown outcome, playing out all the possible scenarios in our mind. From my experience, I found it helpful to put myself out there and face my fears because it definitely gets easier the second time (and it's not as bad as I thought). I know it's easier said than done cause I am still struggling with the same issue as well. At least you found your passion that is music. Most of us have not. If I found my passion I would definitely give in to it, take actions to live it and die for it. Have faith. Plus you can always withdraw when you feel the pressure is too much. Wish you the best.
 

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Have you ever heard of the phrase, 'you think too much'? For the former part, you could learn how to shut down your conscious thinking processes and let your subconscious do the work -- I find that playing music, mostly rock and alternate, and simultaneously engaging in one to three other tasks that do not require deep thinking as a default seems to allow me to rest some time or another. Or, you can take up the job of being a rollercoaster critic.
 

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It isn't impossible for an INTP to be a musician...not all musicians are extroveted. As far as it being difficult to play for others because of the personal nature, well, that is something that will get better the more you do it and the more you practice. I love acting and giving speeches, but I always feel sick to my stomach before I do it and it's hard for me not to change my mind at the last second. Good luck to you and remember to push yourself.
 

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Don't hate being INTP. If you become a different personality you will have other problems which will make you feel that you hate that personality too. It's a never-ending cycle, and you will always have the same amount of problems whatever you do. Like Carl Jung said: Man needs difficulties; they are essential for health.

Just focus on all the happy moments in your life, and live them to the fullest, and don't think much about the sad moments, because just like these happy moments, the sad ones will go away.
 

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That's just what you are as you are now, undeveloped. Being a musician may be easier to some types, but they struggle with other problems. It may require you more work than others, but isn't it then more rewarding too, when you reach your goals? Anyone can do anything that someone else is able to do, but when and how, it depends. But I'm sure you can. :p
 

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I wish I could just be free and not be restrained by my need to think about and formulate opinions on everything all the time. I'm a musician, that's where all my talent and passion is - if I had developed a different personality I could actually be releasing records and touring right now, but instead I'm probably going to end up turning my back on the only thing i've ever really been good at, in order to actually get on in life. I feel as though all my thoughts are just wasted energy that should be going into proper practical interraction with the world and other people. Other people get along fine without being as caught up in their own thoughts as us, why do we need to expend all this extra mental energy for what seems like less benefit in the long run?

If I was an aspiring scientist or programmer or business man or something i'd probably find my personality to be a huge help but I can't stand the rigidity of working with facts and figures or dedicating my life to just making as much profit as possible. People expect musicians to be extrovert showoffs who are always 'in the moment' and either willing to entertain or desiring of an audience to air thier emotions and issues to. I take my music as such a personal thing that it becomes really hard to actually perform anything sincere to anyone. I physically shake when i play people recordings of me. I desperately want to train to be a lead vocalist, but I really can't imagine an INTP dominating the stage and captivating the audience. I'm also terrible at networking with people and making connections, it takes me a long time to get to know people enough to trust them with something as personal as my songs - the idea of telling someone who is essentially a stranger, that it's worth thier time to listen to something i've done is ... well the idea of it is kind of upsetting me now actually.

I can't see myself ever being happy doing something that isn't music-related, i don't really give a fuck about much else. I find relief and liberation in music, it flows organically, it touches people, effects thier emotions and thier thoughts. I just wish my personality matched my skills and my desires. Most people think i'm a writer or business man or a webdesigner or something when I ask them to guess what I do.

Thanks for reading my self-indulgent whining, sorry for taking up your time. If anyone has any advice, i'd love to hear it please.
I used to be a musician too but decided to quit one day.
 

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Hmmm...random hijack.:dry:

Actually a lot of musicians, famous ones, are introverts. Both Pet Shop Boys are I believe, Paul McCartney, most of the Pink Floyd band members (half of the trouble, actually, MBTI could have a field day there)...and I could research more.

Introversion does not and should not get in the way of creativity, however, INTP have a habit of not finishing what they start. With the right motivation though, they can blast away any competition.
 

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Smoke pot

Not saying it'll fix everything, but it might be a nice change of pace for you
 

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Discussion Starter #17
Smoke pot

Not saying it'll fix everything, but it might be a nice change of pace for you
I do. I used to have quite a problem with it actually. I'd have loads of great ideas for songs but I was always way too high to remember or record them. I've calmed down my smoking now so it's just occasional, but I still suck at doing anything when I'm high. If anything, I'd say I need stimulants to help me get off my ass and just do stuff.
 
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Ahh... :sad:
I think most of us can identify with your feelings. I have suffered with crippling anxiety, but you can turn it around. People pay money to be scared. Confront your fear. Let the adrenaline energize you. Master it. It gets easier. Can't imagine an INTP taking a lead role on stage? As someone has already said, INTP is quite capable of it. Personally, I am not a performer but I am comfortable speaking before an audience because that is a skill I learned.

Something you can try is to embrace your inner dork. It is an exercise in self-confidence that is closely related to not caring what people think of you. You can empower yourself by learning to be comfortable with being awkward and eccentric, and that paradoxically makes you feel less awkward. Fuck up on stage and people laugh at you? Congratulations, you are an entertainer. You just made the audience laugh without even trying. That's what I mean by embracing your inner dork.
:tongue:
 
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