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· MOTM Dec 2011
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8,685 Posts
I'm not sure I grasp the OP's statement....

I do personally experience what I call "willful misinterpretation" on the past of others. As the OP seems to say, I feel they purposely will not acknowledge your point because of where it might lead. At every turn, it seems they will take the interpretation which allows them to shoot down your whole perspective, rather than actually grasp it.

This might be a fear of agreeing with you & then being associated with you by others, and thereby rejected by those others for not aligning with them. This is likely why teens make fun of those who are "different" and project negative things onto them, as a way to ensure they are not lumped with them & will not also experience a rejection. It's not safe for them to understand you.

It might be that they are worried about the can of worms it may open up to consider the point you are making; how will this disturb their feelings? They will turn your feeling into something dismissible to avoid that disturbance.

Lastly, I think it's mostly just LAZINESS. The easy interpretation is gone to by default because to consider anything else is too taxing mentally. They want easy, predictable problems so they can provide quick solutions & feel smart & capable.

The problem here is turning understanding into some admission of "you're right". They need to be right more than to understand. They don't see how it has nothing to do with who is right or wrong, just understanding a perspective without attaching a value to it. I think people do this because of their own insecurities, yes.
 
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