[Percorso di Fuoco.]

Hey guys. I just had an experience today where I was very happy and getting confident on a new clothing style, but one bad comment (from a jealous person) ruined my mood for the rest of the day. I learned in another thread that our dominant function, Ne, essentially multiplies the possiblities of whatever we do. However, if it is not fed enough it feeds on our thoughts, the opinions of others, etc. I dwelled on that person's comment for the rest of the day and got into an EVEN worse mood. Have you guys ever experienced something like that? Well anyway Ne also serves essentially as a multiplier for whatever we feel. So if we feel hurt or targeted (as I did) Ne is programmed to give us even MORE reasons to feel that way. Scary isn't it?

Here's where I hope to get interesting. If it can do that with something negative, then imagine something positive. I believe the problem in my situation was not having a very well developed Fi and then my situation was worsened by improper use of Ne, but I digress. Essentially, I've noticed that I tend to never have very constant emotions. It seems that they are always in flux with highs and lows. (and I assume the same for many other people of my type) So, rather than trying to stay constant I'd like to learn how to control the highs and stay that way as much as possible. Anyone care to contribute ideas?

 

[Tridentus]

why should it matter what one person thinks? sorry if this isn't the answer you're looking for, but i can't imagine letting one person's opinion affect me at all like that. if i'm feeling particularly sensitive one day, i know instantly from experience that there are reasons because i've been through the necessary growth of finding out how i tick when i was younger- i know that i might be hungry, or thirsty, or not have had enough sleep, or i'm experiencing more stress from certain things than i'm acutely aware of, or i've not had enough social contact and i need a night out, or something is worrying me and preoccupying me. i then either go out and deal with it, or i contain myself in my mind knowing with surety what the reason for my sensitivity is (which makes all the difference). basically, i manage my emotions by understanding them, and i never stop trying to figure them out.

next time you let something get to you like that, instantly think to yourself "this isn't the real me, there's no need for me to be feeling these emotions, it's just that my emotions are tricking me for some reason, once i can sort out that reason i will be fine". from when i was a teenager, when these moods like you say would fluctuate, the more you understand yourself and how to "manage" yourself, the shorter and weaker the sensitive spells get, until you don't even need to break stride when they come and go.

also i think you're over complicating functions a bit- doing that will absolutely not help you.

 

[Percorso di Fuoco.]

why should it matter what one person thinks? sorry if this isn't the answer you're looking for, but i can't imagine letting one person's opinion affect me at all like that. if i'm feeling particularly sensitive one day, i know instantly from experience that there are reasons because i've been through the necessary growth of finding out how i tick when i was younger- i know that i might be hungry, or thirsty, or not have had enough sleep, or i'm experiencing more stress from certain things than i'm acutely aware of, or i've not had enough social contact and i need a night out, or something is worrying me and preoccupying me. i then either go out and deal with it, or i contain myself in my mind knowing with surety what the reason for my sensitivity is (which makes all the difference). basically, i manage my emotions by understanding them, and i never stop trying to figure them out.

next time you let something get to you like that, instantly think to yourself "this isn't the real me, there's no need for me to be feeling these emotions, it's just that my emotions are tricking me for some reason, once i can sort out that reason i will be fine". from when i was a teenager, when these moods like you say would fluctuate, the more you understand yourself and how to "manage" yourself, the shorter and weaker the sensitive spells get, until you don't even need to break stride when they come and go.

also i think you're over complicating functions a bit- doing that will absolutely not help you.

Thnx this is good advice. I actually have noticed the sensitive spells getting shorter, which is a plus. As far as overcomplicating function goes, could you explain how Ne works then?

 

[austin_music]

Hey guys. I just had an experience today where I was very happy and getting confident on a new clothing style, but one bad comment (from a jealous person) ruined my mood for the rest of the day. I learned in another thread that our dominant function, Ne, essentially multiplies the possiblities of whatever we do. However, if it is not fed enough it feeds on our thoughts, the opinions of others, etc. I dwelled on that person's comment for the rest of the day and got into an EVEN worse mood. Have you guys ever experienced something like that? Well anyway Ne also serves essentially as a multiplier for whatever we feel. So if we feel hurt or targeted (as I did) Ne is programmed to give us even MORE reasons to feel that way. Scary isn't it?

Here's where I hope to get interesting. If it can do that with something negative, then imagine something positive. I believe the problem in my situation was not having a very well developed Fi and then my situation was worsened by improper use of Ne, but I digress. Essentially, I've noticed that I tend to never have very constant emotions. It seems that they are always in flux with highs and lows. (and I assume the same for many other people of my type) So, rather than trying to stay constant I'd like to learn how to control the highs and stay that way as much as possible. Anyone care to contribute ideas?

It is true even the subtlest Facial queues/ reactions that I can see with the similar scenario can change my mood for the day.
That's true maybe we have to learn not to give shit about what people is saying to us in negative degree. Because people's reaction pretty harms us. Better hear the good things and shut down when it is negative and not necessary.

 

[abbylee]

I'm totally with Tridentus here.
Overall, I have the worst reactions to negative comments when I am tired, hungry, bored, thirsty, feeling upset about the future, etc. Then, if I get an insult or negative comment, I get a bit upset (not like crying or anything, but I might think about it off ans on throughout the day). I've also found that insults or even just careless words from those I care about matter much more than ones from people I don't care about. Just an observation - not really sure what you can do with that. I think part of it is that I want to impress and please those people so much more.

Anyway, for me I think that it's usually because things are slowly building up. Or, if I had been having a good day previous to that point, I try to remind myself to MOVE ON. I can get stuck on something like that very easily, and I try my very best to think about something else. Control your mind!

I think all Tridentus is trying to say about complicating the functions is that you might be over-analyzing yourself. I love to read about how my mind works (or Might work) but deep down we're all just people and the types are pretty theoretical. Relax and just ask Yourself why it bothered you so much. Might have just hit a raw nerve for some reason.

 

[Crystall]

Hey guys. I just had an experience today where I was very happy and getting confident on a new clothing style, but one bad comment (from a jealous person) ruined my mood for the rest of the day. I learned in another thread that our dominant function, Ne, essentially multiplies the possiblities of whatever we do. However, if it is not fed enough it feeds on our thoughts, the opinions of others, etc. I dwelled on that person's comment for the rest of the day and got into an EVEN worse mood. Have you guys ever experienced something like that? Well anyway Ne also serves essentially as a multiplier for whatever we feel. So if we feel hurt or targeted (as I did) Ne is programmed to give us even MORE reasons to feel that way. Scary isn't it?

Here's where I hope to get interesting. If it can do that with something negative, then imagine something positive. I believe the problem in my situation was not having a very well developed Fi and then my situation was worsened by improper use of Ne, but I digress. Essentially, I've noticed that I tend to never have very constant emotions. It seems that they are always in flux with highs and lows. (and I assume the same for many other people of my type) So, rather than trying to stay constant I'd like to learn how to control the highs and stay that way as much as possible. Anyone care to contribute ideas?

First of all yeeey and thank you for speaking about functions! It's too rare on these forums imo... and that's really interesting about Ne. Where did you hear about it?

As for wanting to stay high, oh my gosh, don't we all?! But that's just life you know and unfortunately life just sucks for no reason sometimes. I'm really emotional as well, and I tend to take a lot of things personally and have a hard time putting them out of my mind. But whenever life feels shitty you just gotta remember that it's like a wave in the ocean, and however much it may feel like you're drowning you just gotta trust that the wave will pass and the water will become calm again.

I find it really helpful to talk about whatever's bothering me and get some emotional support. When I get home from work I just spew out everything bad that happened that day to my boyfriend. If it's something that's really bothering me horribly and talking to my boyfriend doesn't help I'll go to a friend's house, or call my mom, and so on, until I've gotten enough of another person's perspective to feel like I can distance myself from it as well. Once I've shared my feelings with someone I can more easily let things go and objectively figure out what I'm going to do about them.
Love yourself and everyone around you. I can't say this enough to people. Feeling love and secure within yourself is the best protection in the world. If you can radiate that, nothing bad can get to you.
Forgiveness also helps to free you from obsessing over what someone's done to you. Try to see things from their point of view and realize that they're only human and that they most likely didn't realize what they were doing was hurting you.
Other than that just try to stay away from the people who bring you down. If they have low self esteem and become jealous and draining to be around don't feel bad about cutting them out of your life...
If all else fails, cry. :/ As a last resort, it usually hits the spot because you get to release a lot of stress hormones in the process.

 

[Percorso di Fuoco.]

I heard about Ne on one of the tagged threads on either the ENFP or functions main page.