No. I'm just not that afraid of pain. It's not about the pain, its about celebrating life... and also that all experiences are temporary, including the pain. I don't even know. It's not a well formed idea, but I just wouldn't go easy. A gun? Fuck that.What the fuck? This is the second INTP that wants to die a painful, slow death. Are you a sadist or what..? Explain to me the logic behind this.
I think death is permanent, that sleep is what life is supposed to be. This "life" is just a stage of waking and a phase that will eventually pass. Pain is really the only thing I'm afraid of because it's severely consciously felt more than anything else. Death I don't give a fuck about.This probably sounds fucked up but it feels like an old friend that is patiently waiting for me to join it and I am eager to see it again, in the past I have been too eager... I feel like death would be like dreamless sleep, my favorite stage of sleep. I'm content with this, like I said I am eager for it. I don't want to exist forever.