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More often than not, would you say youre more likely to approach the person youre attracted to?
I've noticed ENTPs are quite introverted for extroverts aside from the fact that they can really elaborate on shit. No offence.
So I really wouldn't be surprised by either response in this situation.

This is under hypothetical circumstances where signs of attraction from both end are neutral/ can't be certain if reciprocated or not- what are you most likely to do?
 

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I am like a million times more confident now than I ever have been. I am 52. When I was in my prime dating years I was very unlikely to approach. I am primary 8 enneatype but secondary 4. I was much more proud chasee than chaser. That was horrible as a man. It cost me so many many amazing women in terms of ... I'll never know.

After about age 35 I gained the standing confidence and serious 'let's see what happens next' attitude that is the calling card of a typical ENTP. I never lost my uncanny knack for saying precisely the wrong thing to irritate and offend mainstream robots, so, I now approach a lot more women and still offend them, but, in approaching, I unleash potential. I can quickly identify women that are offended and intrigued or just intrigued. That is the great game.
 
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Depends on the kind of attraction. If I am attracted to someone by looks alone, chances are I won't, unless it's late at night and there's a big group of people and I'm feeling a little brave. If I am attracted to someone by their humour, I'm zipping over to talk. Same with if I'm attracted to their personality/other.

If I am attracted to someone who I have not quite yet officially met, I kind of watch from afar and gather what I can about them. If they appear to be someone I think I would get along with, I approach them first.

I've also got pretty good at picking out those who also despise pointless small talk and would rather just have a long conversation with some sort of meaning behind it; whether the attraction is just friendly or romantic doesn't matter; chances are I'm walking up to them and striking up a conversation.

And now I'm being an ENTP and elaborating on shit buttt that's how it is sometimes :tongue:
 

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I become either very passive or very aggressive. Nothing in between.
Basically it is an effort to approach someone, so unless I really want to (not the kind of two or three months crush I usually have), I would not bother because it will pass anyway.
But when I am really motivated, I only know to do it as if I've done it several times. Sometimes confidence covers up my lack of experience.
 

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If the assumption here is that I have never spoken with them previously then the attractiveness has nothing to do with whether I talk to them or not. There are entirely too many attractive people wandering around for me to go worrying about how good looking I think the person is. If I did that I’d spend half my life in some state of social anxiety. Fuck that, they’re still just people.
 

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I personally adapt to the person so it depends on them. Usually i'll approach introverts more often and sometimes let extroverts approach me. I guess i do usually get to the point of where i don't care to wait around for someone so i'll get direct.
 

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If the assumption here is that I have never spoken with them previously then the attractiveness has nothing to do with whether I talk to them or not. There are entirely too many attractive people wandering around for me to go worrying about how good looking I think the person is. If I did that I’d spend half my life in some state of social anxiety. Fuck that, they’re still just people.
Since when do you post here? ;)

To answer OP: I approach more now than I ever have before. I used to never, I was a pretty socially anxious person. Now though.... forget it. LoL
 
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Its like with any other person for me, just more interesting and more of a "mind game". I will aproach and start checking the field with questions or talking about my viewpoints. Ill change the subject however i see het to be interested. Ill use humor (maybe too much).
And i will show too much ego in those interactions.
If it goes well we are going to get deep and thats what i like.
 

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well I will test them if they like me back I will approach them

I will make this person notice me,I will show them how awesome and amazing I am and if they like me back I will confess to them,if not I will move on
 

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It depends on the context.

I mean, if I'm at work and this gorgeous man enters the room it would be a bit stupid of me to approach him and tell him how attracted I am to him.
On the other hand, I can say that at a bar at night if the same situation happens.
 
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Since I overcame my anxiety about how irresistibly attractive you are!
About damn time. I've been waiting. . . :blushed:
 
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Of course! But the guy is very likely to be intimidated and tell me to hold my horses.
I become very enthusiastic at the first ten minutes. If the conversation gets boring I just go straight back home.
 
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Actually I have asked men out before, but not right after meeting them. I get to know them a bit before taking the next step. However, as a woman in the U.S. it usually doesn't turn out well. They either think A. I'm "easy" (don't even get me started on double standards and how having a healthy sexual appetite does NOT mean you are an immoral or unworthy individual) or B. They think I'm desperate, a major turn off or C. They lose interest because I'm too "aggressive".

It's a case of you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. I have been described in the past as exuding a masculine vibe, which from what I've seen from most ENTP women in online forums is fairly common...However that in itself is a major turn off as well.

Considering how far behind the United States is in terms of gender equality and various other issues compared to Western Europe for instance, being an ENTP female is a recipe for ostracization and loneliness. Most WOMEN don't understand you for that matter, let alone men. If you happen to be considered attractive to the opposite sex as well...You're fucked metaphorically, in other words. Because since a fair portion of men will find you attractive, once you open your mouth and they realize you will neither placate them or stoke their egos and are intelligent as well, you will be drop kicked into the lowest depths of hell without a second thought. Because you committed the unspeakable crime of being an attractive woman who is a REAL person, NOT a blow up doll.

So I rarely ask men out, which sucks because usually the men who approach me I have nothing in common with...(Intellectually and interests as well)
 

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It's a case of you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. I have been described in the past as exuding a masculine vibe, which from what I've seen from most ENTP women in online forums is fairly common...However that in itself is a major turn off as well.

Considering how far behind the United States is in terms of gender equality and various other issues compared to Western Europe for instance, being an ENTP female is a recipe for ostracization and loneliness. Most WOMEN don't understand you for that matter, let alone men. If you happen to be considered attractive to the opposite sex as well...You're fucked metaphorically, in other words. Because since a fair portion of men will find you attractive, once you open your mouth and they realize you will neither placate them or stoke their egos and are intelligent as well, you will be drop kicked into the lowest depths of hell without a second thought. Because you committed the unspeakable crime of being an attractive woman who is a REAL person, NOT a blow up doll.


So I rarely ask men out, which sucks because usually the men who approach me I have nothing in common with...(Intellectually and interests as well)
So, bluntly, the first part of your post sounds exactly like me, and I have really good success with that. I am perhaps masculine in personality, ask guys out in bars etc, have slept with people but it doesn't seem to bother guys, and I don't have any negative blow-back from it. In fact, I have guys message me months and years later seeing how I am and if I am single again. So, I wonder where in the country you are (not that you need to say, but perhaps that could affect it a bit...), and TBH if something else isn't going on. Because frankly, even when I vacation in other places in the country, I still don't have problems, and guys really find my personality refreshing and attractive (of course, I'm going after attractive, confident, smart guys).

The second part though, you sound super angry, and I must say if that is coming across in these situations, guys probably won't be having it. I think part of what helps with the ENTP female power dynamic is that I'm fun, witty, flirty, and lighthearted. I'm not a ditz by any means (as I've said in other posts, on first dates guys often describe me as "intellectually intimidating"), but guys want to keep dating me. However, any sort of harsh or angry stuff I would say is less a confidence thing and more of a negative interaction thing that can drive men away.

At any rate, I think for strong women, that is what makes the major difference between success and failure, through my extensive singular, anecdotal research;)
 
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It's a case of you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. I have been described in the past as exuding a masculine vibe, which from what I've seen from most ENTP women in online forums is fairly common...However that in itself is a major turn off as well.

Considering how far behind the United States is in terms of gender equality and various other issues compared to Western Europe for instance, being an ENTP female is a recipe for ostracization and loneliness. Most WOMEN don't understand you for that matter, let alone men. If you happen to be considered attractive to the opposite sex as well...You're fucked metaphorically, in other words. Because since a fair portion of men will find you attractive, once you open your mouth and they realize you will neither placate them or stoke their egos and are intelligent as well, you will be drop kicked into the lowest depths of hell without a second thought. Because you committed the unspeakable crime of being an attractive woman who is a REAL person, NOT a blow up doll.


So I rarely ask men out, which sucks because usually the men who approach me I have nothing in common with...(Intellectually and interests as well)
So, bluntly, the first part of your post sounds exactly like me, and I have really good success with that. I am perhaps masculine in personality, ask guys out in bars etc, have slept with people but it doesn't seem to bother guys, and I don't have any negative blow-back from it. In fact, I have guys message me months and years later seeing how I am and if I am single again. So, I wonder where in the country you are (not that you need to say, but perhaps that could affect it a bit...), and TBH if something else isn't going on. Because frankly, even when I vacation in other places in the country, I still don't have problems, and guys really find my personality refreshing and attractive (of course, I'm going after attractive, confident, smart guys).

The second part though, you sound super angry, and I must say if that is coming across in these situations, guys probably won't be having it. I think part of what helps with the ENTP female power dynamic is that I'm fun, witty, flirty, and lighthearted. I'm not a ditz by any means (as I've said in other posts, on first dates guys often describe me as "intellectually intimidating"), but guys want to keep dating me. However, any sort of harsh or angry stuff I would say is less a confidence thing and more of a negative interaction thing that can drive men away.

At any rate, I think for strong women, that is what makes the major difference between success and failure, through my extensive singular, anecdotal research;)
You're exactly right, I am pretty angry right now. Have had nothing but shitty luck with men lately, so that is part of the reason for said anger. And if you come across as angry and negative, it will drive anyone away, male or female. But honestly, I'm at the point I no longer care, because we spend so much time as a society putting up a front pretending everything is ok when it's not. Because anything less than perfection is unacceptable, more so with negative emotions. Why pretend to be happy when you're not? Why laugh at jokes that aren't funny? We seem to have an aversion to anything remotely negative in this country, and it almost feels like we're all on stage, all the time. I'm at the point where I refuse to pretend to smile when I don't feel like it, even IF it drives off a fair portion of men. I don't expect them to put on a happy front for me for instance. To each their own, and maybe this attitude of refusing to wear a mask drives men away, but I am being true to myself, even if that means most people can't handle it..I just won't play that game anymore.

As far as where I am, it's a conservative area, for the moment. I have a bit of a gypsy spirit, and tend to move to a new place every few years or so.

In regards to the bar scene, it's never been appealing to me. I tried it, stuck out like a sore thumb. Didn't care for the cliquish aspect, or the superficial conversations. I can talk about almost anything, however spending an hour in a bar listening to people talk about going to Cabo and the latest designer fashions made me want to drive a screwdriver through my eardrum to shut it all out. In other words, I don't care for hipsters.

Have never been good at flirting. My idea of flirting is bluntly asking a guy out, or asking him if he wants to have sex. Subtlety has never been a speciality of mine.

Think it also depends on what socio-economic circles you run in. Your comment gave me the implication you are in a higher socio-economic bracket than I am, which means though we maybe of the same personality type our experiences will be vastly different. I do tend to think people of different socio-economic groups value different things, though there is some overlap.

In other words, I had a hard time relating to your experiences, because we appear to come from different economic groups, and appear to approach life in a different manner and value different things. Though I do understand what you're trying to tell me overall..There ARE dramatic differences between one region of the U.S. as compared to another as well.
 

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Think it also depends on what socio-economic circles you run in. Your comment gave me the implication you are in a higher socio-economic bracket than I am, which means though we maybe of the same personality type our experiences will be vastly different. I do tend to think people of different socio-economic groups value different things, though there is some overlap.

In other words, I had a hard time relating to your experiences, because we appear to come from different economic groups, and appear to approach life in a different manner and value different things. Though I do understand what you're trying to tell me overall..There ARE dramatic differences between one region of the U.S. as compared to another as well.
Hmmm...for the first part, you should just move to Finland. I think your brand of bar flirting would go over incredibly well there;)

In terms of the second, it is fair to say that I am from a higher socio-economic bracket, however I have never dated exclusively within it. My current and hopefully forever partner never finished college. I have higher degrees, however your post made me think back, and I have never actually seriously dated a guy who had a higher degree. My more serious relationship in college was with a bartender that dropped out of high school. They are all, however, incredibly smart guys. Not from the same background, and haven't by societal standards "achieved" perhaps, but I am attracted to their intelligence, confidence, humor, and ability to be street smart survivors I suppose.

So, in terms of the approach, it is interesting because as an ENTP anyhow, and a woman, it seems to work well on economics grads from England and on GED attained firefighters from the South and on fly fishing bartenders from Colorado who majored in forestry and Spanish. I wonder what the parallels are, because there must be something, to be fair. Mostly, the feedback I get pretty consistently is that I am fun, smart, and that relationships with me are pretty easy. That said, big things come up (cancer in the family for example), but people are in it with me, which is cool.

I don't say this to say everything is roses - I am a chore of a person a lot of the time, admittedly. But your comments got me thinking, "out loud" -ish.
 

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Yes. I am an ENTP female and when I am attracted to someone I will approach them. I will become friends with them at first to test the waters and figure out if my feelings are real or just an illusion that passes after I hang out with them for a while. I will show I like them with my body language and behaviour though so its not exactly "friends". I usually get along with people easily: I work as an extra actress and during one of the recordings I were asked if I am actually dating the guy I happened to paired with for the episode sake, which I seen first time in my life and was just talking to like I usually do. So you get the idea. I feel I need to be even more open when I actually like someone so they feel different from all the random guys and girls I talk with every day therefore I am pretty obvious when I like someone. I will stare at them, look them into eyes, touch them, follow them around...

However I happen to have a taste for social misfits so every single time (4 times so far) I do it everyone knows I like them but they stay clueless and I have to gather my courage and actually confess. This is the difficult part. So far I chickened out twice, got friendzoned once due to waiting too long (2 years) and ... well, I am not sure about the result of 4th time yet because I am currently waiting for an answer. I try to not get my hopes up because I could be wrong but I think the outcome will be positive this time - relationship seems like the most logical choice so as long as the guy(INTP) doesn't get scared it should be fine. I am pretty and our both mental and physical compatibility seems good so there is no downsides. And if not - I will let him know yes and no are not the only possible answers. I don't want to let go of the feeling yet (it's too exciting) and if dating is out of question it wouldn't hurt to stay friends that hug every now and then and perhaps do more if the mood gets right at some point in the future. I was in that kind of relationship before (although I am still a virgin - we just never got to the intercourse part) and I liked it despite not liking the partner more than a friend (he insisted he wants to date me despite me rejecting him 3 times so eventually I offered that as a compromise, because I was curious about sexuality and didn't have anybody I liked at that time) - so I see no reason why my current crush wouldn't like it. It's a good experience.
 
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