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Discussion Starter #1
That says it all. I met a guy I like, we're having regular sex. He doesn't want a long-term commitment, and I do, so this doesn't have LT potential. But I am enjoying for what it is. I feel safe around him, and I am uninhibited.

He knows I haven't been with a lot of people and he doesn't understand that. He think I could have my pick of my men. But for an INFJ, it's not so simple. I crave connection and intimacy first, and a lot of guys just fail on that part.

So this is my update.
 

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I'm reading online about someone finally getting some. I guess we're even.
 

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I'm glad for you, but in all seriousness, wouldn't this have been more fitting for something like the random thoughts thread? You've given us nothing for discussion :/.
 

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Sounds like a craigslist hook up so I can't imagine too many jealous parties here -- although, I doubt you were aiming to do that, it may be interpreted as such.

In any case, if you feel secure with the type of relationship you're in, then good on you. FWB tends to be rather common nowadays and women tend to be shamed for it while men are high fived. So kudos for just being real.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
@Sedem -- it might have been, but as an INFJ, I've been frustrated lately by my need for meaning. I posted on PC about this. I've begun to see it hamper not help me in terms of relationships. Sex always seemed remote and mystical whereas other people had fun. In fact, this side of me was getting me angry. I felt like I was missing out But now I'm getting laid. Maybe I won't get laid again for 6 years, but I am now.
 

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Sounds like a craigslist hook up so I can't imagine too many jealous parties here -- although, I doubt you were aiming to do that, it may be interpreted as such.
It is not my aim to start any fires, especially any braziers of my own, but are you suggesting, Ser, that a craigslist hookup is not a valid cornerstone in one's romantic journey. Just to be sure that that is what you're saying here, Ser.
 

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I've been frustrated lately by my need for meaning [...] whereas other people had fun [...] I felt like I was missing out
I'll take a lot of liberty as I interpret that, aaaand... I think you're trying to deny your needs :)

I'll continue with this line of thinking and say that denial is one possible reaction we have when we can't figure out a way to find and get what we want.

This is irrelevant of type, but I need that too, a connection before sex. Gives meaning to sex. With the kind of stereotypes that we have, do you know how this looks like for a guy? Wishy-washy.

This is gonna sound crazy, but have you checked out ESTPs?

It is not my aim to start any fires, especially any braziers of my own, but are you suggesting, Ser, that a craigslist hookup is not a valid cornerstone in one's romantic journey. Just to be sure that that is what you're saying here, Ser.
That was a right "hook" :D
 

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Virtual High V.

Just make sure you hold back your emotions. Getting attached to someone who isn't in it for a relationship is the worst. That's why I think 2 people should ALWAYS be on the same page (or at least close to the same page) before having sex. If one sees it as FWB, and the other sees relationship-potential, that can be very problematic. The sex is good now, but once it goes down the shitter, you'll wish that you didn't have sex w/ them b/c of the pain it brings.

BUT, if you can leave your emotions out of it, then WOOT WOOT good for you. Have fun!
 
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LOVED the 'shit jealous girls say'.


I'm fond of FWB sex. It's pretty much the best of both worlds if you're just not in a place for a relationship but don't want random hook-ups. Sex with a friend you enjoy spending time around but can't take seriously as an LTR.

Er.... the emotions things with sex. That didn't come up as an issue for me when I was single. I hear it can be problem. If you think it's gonna be a problem, do him a favour and drop this before it becomes a problem. If I were him, I wouldn't want to be painted as the bad guy at the end of this.
 

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I don't think you should settle just because something is hard to find. I think you could miss out on a lot of opportunities while you're wrapped up in this thing. I think you deserve better but I respect your decision. Just figured you were seeking some sort of feedback otherwise you wouldn't have posted this here.
 
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