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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
s what i have been doing.. ive been taking a break from dating and just supporting myself.. and well the one that is dating my friend.. we broke up 8 months ago. and we JUST got to a point where we are back to being friends and will probably hang out sometimes, so i dont want to ruin that!! and the other one.. ive sorta talked to him and he knows how i still feel about him i think... so as much as ive been moving on and been really posotive 'happy' and all.. once im alone with my thoughts i have a meltdown or two.
 

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Yeah that happens. The negative just seems to creep up on you when you're alone. I don't think you should block them, just try to see a better alternative and try not to let emotions get the best of you. You can try to tell the one that's not with your friend again in a way that will make you feel comfortable and make you feel like you are really letting it out or getting the stress out at least.
 

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I think I would ask them that first, what their feelings were for me and how could they fall out of love easily and then tell them that I still feel the same. Somehow though, I think you need to just get some closure.
 

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I think the whole being in and out of love thing is odd. I mean it seems like it's not real in a way, since you can fall in and out of love with someone. But I think when you really love someone, that doesn't go away. So even when relationships take different forms, people still can care for each other and love each other. It sounds like you are a person that they still love or at least care about (after all one of them still wants to hang out and be friends with you). Sorry you are hurting and it didn't work out.

Just try not to beat yourself up to much for the whole, why did they both fall out of love with me thing. I think even the best couples who stay together forever grow out of that whole pink cloud "in love" phase and settle into a more compatible deep mutual respect kind of love place.
Perhaps in time, you can have both again.I( am kinda going through something similar and when I let myself go down into that whole "what is wrong with me" place, things get really dark and hurtful.) Just know that you obviously have something that attracts people and that you have good qualities.
Also, are the exes similar in anyway? ( I know that I tend to fall for guys who don't want serious relationships and I get hurt).
Anyways, hang in there, and hope things get brighter soon : -)
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
yeah im good ar reading people and the one with my friend still has like feelikngs for me but is afraid of rekindling anything... and the other one doesnt even think of me as a friend because he avoids me and never talks to me anymore. i do think someday ill probably get back together with him. but not for awhile.
 

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feelings always linger for me, of course you remember the postitive things that were the reason you liked them, but you can't forget the the negatives that broke you up. i'm not saying it'sa bad thing to see the good in people, but you need to think odjectivily...or something

i truly hope you feel better soon!
 

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It's always hard getting over someone,I know it probably hurts a lot to see your friend with him but
they're probably happy right now but also keep in mind that young love doesn't last long.
As for the other person Have you tried to ask if he has feelings for you still? Maybe he does,maybe he doesn't
If he does then you could always give it another try.
If he doesn't I know it's really hard to move on and it will hurt but you should keep yourself busy
and still cherish the memories you had with them.
 

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I feel like giving her a hug or flowers...maybe its just me.
I know what its like to have your ex go out with a good friend.
Just express and feel - bottling it all in never helps on any level.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
How can you be in love with two people? :/
i was in love with the first one.. and then i moved on by meeting the other one and fell in love with him.. and now im stuck with the hurt from him, and i dont know if i love the other one... but it still hurts more than anything. but i know that i loved the with my whole heart and i will always feel love for them with the pieces that they broke.
 

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I'm sorry you're hurting. INFPs can hurt so deeply - as deeply as we can love. Maybe writing about it will help?

It has taken a long time for me to get over losing a certain friendship (not romantic, but strong, nonetheless). I loved her absolutely and completely. I finally got tired of giving my all to a relationship that no longer existed. I cried for a couple months. Then I was numb for a couple weeks. Now, I'm starting to get past it all. I can see her without crying. I can even talk with her without feeling the need to give her a hug, or even smile. I'm finally seeing her as just another somebody in this crazy world. I am moving on.

I don't know if what helped me will help you, but it might be worth a try. I wrote and wrote and wrote in my journal, here on these forums, and on my blog. I didn't have anybody IRL to share it with, but if you have somebody you trust, talking with him/her could help. I sang, listened to music, hid out in a tree in my backyard and cried and cried. Day after day after day. It's ok to mourn. You will get over it.

(((hugs))) I hope you are able to move past the pain quickly, and move on to the more enjoyable things in life.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
thank you.. ha i have been crying a lot.. over every relationship that i have lost when i put alll of my love into it. like my 2 exes and people that used to be my friends that have hurt me or we lost our friendship.. it hurts so bad.. people seem to just go thru me like tissues! im there for them when they need me and i think its sincere friendship or love or what not becuase i LOVE them but then they just throw me away becuase theyre done with me, and im not even any form of value to them at all! :sad:
 

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I know that it can hurt to watch the ones you love fall away, but we have to remember that in this world the only true law is change. Love often comes and goes like the seasons, we bask in the summer sun, enjoy the ageless beauty of the autumn leaves, revel in the quiet tranquility of the snowy seasons.. But when it ends the best we can do is remember it fondly. If we become hung up on one season of our lives, we miss all the beauty of the next.

Love is a funny thing. I speak from experience when I say that if you ever truly loved someone, you'll never stop. However, that love changes over time. There are people in my life whom I have loved deeply, and it certainly hurt when our paths led different ways.. But I've come to realize that no matter the circumstances, I will always carry a part of them with me. It is those we love who create the person we are. Some of these people I will likely never see again, but I don't need to feel sorry because I know that they are still in my heart.

You are young and beautiful, and one day you're going to find someone who wants to share all of your seasons. In the meantime, let life come and try not to worry over the things you can't control.


Keep your chin up miss, I promise it gets better. :happy:
 

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thank you.. ha i have been crying a lot.. over every relationship that i have lost when i put alll of my love into it. like my 2 exes and people that used to be my friends that have hurt me or we lost our friendship.. it hurts so bad.. people seem to just go thru me like tissues! im there for them when they need me and i think its sincere friendship or love or what not becuase i LOVE them but then they just throw me away becuase theyre done with me, and im not even any form of value to them at all! :sad:
i feel like that sometiems as well. if you love someone thats the ultimate comliment, and if they aren't willing to return it then they don't deserve it. we want to believe people love us, and we think something is wrong with us if they don't. it's the oppisite,it's a gfit being so capable of love, and someday you'll find someone who share it with you.
 
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