Dear Izzie,
An ultimately huge setback in circumstances and personal obstacles have caused great stress and sadness inside you even when you often don't show it. There are plans left unfulfilled and you didn't know you would take a turn this way on your educational path although you once had a feeling you would face something like this. You feel as if something is not right, something is unjustified because at one point you were going through too much mental exhaustion beyond belief and you wanted to be understood to the point that you couldn't concentrate well in getting through your exams. You secretly feel exhausted, unappreciated, pulled at, mixed up, frustrated inside. You feel like your best was hampered by your emotions but you were too tired to overcome them because you got tired of almost endless fighting. You want people to see that you've had enough and it's already been too much for far too long.
Just remember in spite of everything you go through, there is a light inside you currently. A light of higher strength and independence. You cannot help but feel connected to that light. You will never go back to being who you were, and that light, although it is growing slowly, is attempting to burn out your past pains bit by bit. You feel it overtaking you at times.
You wish you can be less scared in wanting what you want, and growing. It's time for you to see that you should not be guilty anymore of growing and that you owe the world, perhaps the people in your life, a happiness that is personal with you. In other words, you need to be happier with yourself. Haven't you had enough? It's already been too much, and you need to hold on to that light.
It takes time to find most of the courage that you need, but you cannot possibly fulfill all the ideals and significant expectations you have been bound to. Your fears of being brainwashed and of maybe ending up somewhere you don't want to end up have hampered you from getting courage. Remember that bad things will also come to the ones who took advantage of you. It is time to be your own person and to ''just believe'' in your inner voice, even though it takes time, because you deserve this for once just for yourself after everything you've been through.
Try to let go, ''just believe'' and just grow the way you know you're supposed to grow. Deep down inside you know how you're supposed to grow, but you've just been too afraid.
An ultimately huge setback in circumstances and personal obstacles have caused great stress and sadness inside you even when you often don't show it. There are plans left unfulfilled and you didn't know you would take a turn this way on your educational path although you once had a feeling you would face something like this. You feel as if something is not right, something is unjustified because at one point you were going through too much mental exhaustion beyond belief and you wanted to be understood to the point that you couldn't concentrate well in getting through your exams. You secretly feel exhausted, unappreciated, pulled at, mixed up, frustrated inside. You feel like your best was hampered by your emotions but you were too tired to overcome them because you got tired of almost endless fighting. You want people to see that you've had enough and it's already been too much for far too long.
Just remember in spite of everything you go through, there is a light inside you currently. A light of higher strength and independence. You cannot help but feel connected to that light. You will never go back to being who you were, and that light, although it is growing slowly, is attempting to burn out your past pains bit by bit. You feel it overtaking you at times.
You wish you can be less scared in wanting what you want, and growing. It's time for you to see that you should not be guilty anymore of growing and that you owe the world, perhaps the people in your life, a happiness that is personal with you. In other words, you need to be happier with yourself. Haven't you had enough? It's already been too much, and you need to hold on to that light.
It takes time to find most of the courage that you need, but you cannot possibly fulfill all the ideals and significant expectations you have been bound to. Your fears of being brainwashed and of maybe ending up somewhere you don't want to end up have hampered you from getting courage. Remember that bad things will also come to the ones who took advantage of you. It is time to be your own person and to ''just believe'' in your inner voice, even though it takes time, because you deserve this for once just for yourself after everything you've been through.
Try to let go, ''just believe'' and just grow the way you know you're supposed to grow. Deep down inside you know how you're supposed to grow, but you've just been too afraid.
