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I hate family gatherings - especially those on my husband's side of the family. They sit around for hours talking about this or that cousin - none of whom I knew. And it gets worse when everyone's supposed to go out for lunch together at 'some point'. I feel 'trapped' by these situations because i am not 'in control' - my time and schedule is at everyone's mercy and I have no freaking idea what time it'll be all over and I can go back to my own stuff. On days that I feel like being blatant (which is almost every time there is a family gathering), I just ignore the conversation and escape into a world of my own. I've been labelled as 'unparticipative' but like the hell I care!

Does any other ISTP feel that way?
 

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Definitely. Just went on holiday with friends and on the first night they chose the room I was in would be the place they all went. Grr! One night they all decided they'd drink I just sat there for 3 hours looking out the window. It was actually really calming.
 

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I hate family gatherings - especially those on my husband's side of the family. They sit around for hours talking about this or that cousin - none of whom I knew. And it gets worse when everyone's supposed to go out for lunch together at 'some point'. I feel 'trapped' by these situations because i am not 'in control' - my time and schedule is at everyone's mercy and I have no freaking idea what time it'll be all over and I can go back to my own stuff. On days that I feel like being blatant (which is almost every time there is a family gathering), I just ignore the conversation and escape into a world of my own. I've been labelled as 'unparticipative' but like the hell I care!
I'm a recluse. Thanks for reminding me what I'm missing.
 

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Yes.

I'm pretty much the black sheep in my family because of it. I have ceased to care.
 
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Pretty much. Family gatherings, trapped and unparticipative (unless I am taking the piss out of my mother-in-law†) pretty much go hand-in-hand.

† my mother-in-law is, in equal measure, a snob and bigot. But with a great sense of humour. She will literally laugh until she is sick; a challenge I cannot resist :)
 

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All the time, at any type of gathering. Not just then either. I'll be in the car, staring out the window, at nothing really, and my dad will back my reverie with a "Snap out of it!"

It's more fun in my head anyway... :crazy:
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Pretty much. Family gatherings, trapped and unparticipative (unless I am taking the piss out of my mother-in-law†) pretty much go hand-in-hand.

† my mother-in-law is, in equal measure, a snob and bigot. But with a great sense of humour. She will literally laugh until she is sick; a challenge I cannot resist :)
LOL....don't even get me started on THE m-i-l...... she's a truly nice lady but I wish she'd stop making silly jokes because I inevitably end up feeling a little mean that I'm not roaring my head off.

Sometimes I wonder if people in general find it a little harder to accept ISTP's than any other types. Granted, we are not the warmest and friendliest people around and in a crowded room, people will not naturally gravitate towards us :)
 

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All the time, at any type of gathering. Not just then either. I'll be in the car, staring out the window, at nothing really, and my dad will back my reverie with a "Snap out of it!"

It's more fun in my head anyway... :crazy:
EXACTLY - they have no idea how much fun goes on in our heads!
 

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I'm with ya

I hate the family gatherings too on either side of the family. We lived away from home for the better part of 20 years and I got to where I returned for Christmas for like 3 days and that was it...I didn't mind when either parents came to our place as I could use work as a reason not to be around, but it was just 2 people, so it was manageable and usually enjoyable since they were on my turf I guess..I lost my job and we actually live in my parent's basement, and I am so introverted that I rarely venture upstairs lest I be cornered by my mother and have to engage in small talk and then life talk etc.

So, yes, you could say that I feel your pain..lol....And don't talk about group photos..lol.
 

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Family gatherings are the worst. Forever and ever they talk about whos who and whats going on like its the most important news in the world. Its not -.-. I avoid every event i can, if i cant dodge it and i spend the time outside or in the other room. Same applies to social events im forced to attend due to various circumstances.
 

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Sometimes I wonder if people in general find it a little harder to accept ISTP's than any other types. Granted, we are not the warmest and friendliest people around and in a crowded room, people will not naturally gravitate towards us :)
That's been my experience more often than not. People frequently try to get me to change who I am to be more like them and/or assign the wrong motivations/intentions to my words and actions.

But, on the flip side, I don't sit in a dark corner wearing a scowl. I'm inviting and polite. I can even be the life of the party for a short time but, I just prefer to keep to myself and watch the interactions going on around me.
 

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I'm glad I came across this thread, I was starting to think that I'm N with all the times I retreat to my thoughts when surrounded by a crowd. Usually when I'm bored I try to do something but if you're in a situation where it's considered socially unacceptable to play horse against yourself with a sugar cube and a pot of coffee there's little else to do.
 

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LOL....don't even get me started on THE m-i-l...... she's a truly nice lady but I wish she'd stop making silly jokes because I inevitably end up feeling a little mean that I'm not roaring my head off.

Sometimes I wonder if people in general find it a little harder to accept ISTP's than any other types. Granted, we are not the warmest and friendliest people around and in a crowded room, people will not naturally gravitate towards us :)
I remember meeting potential in-laws, a bunch of ENFJ's and a couple other Ewhatevers. I made some one liner joke about dropping a bomb on someone's house with my fighter jet and they all gasped. That was the last time I spoke.
 

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It is the definition of introversion - introverts respond to some stimulus in environment by taking it in and thinking it over to themselves. The drive to react back at environment is lower. Introverts usually feel frustrated when extraverts want to force them to keep on interacting. Extraverts are most comfortable when they are frequently interacting with their environment. They feel frustrated if they aren't provided that interaction. Hence why they may bug the introverts. It gets easier with T-type extraverts because they aren't as people-oriented so their extraversion is not that frequently oriented at people, talking to people, talking about people, etc.
 

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Am I the only one who likes these gatherings at all? I like to know everything about everyone though it bores me not to be able to get a word in edgeways over my nan.
 

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Am I the only one who likes these gatherings at all? I like to know everything about everyone though it bores me not to be able to get a word in edgeways over my nan.
I like them in limited amounts. For instance, it's a lot of fun to hang out with other bands in the back parking lot of a club. But, only for an hour or two and then I get drained.
 

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I avoid social gatherings...I don't do small talk...and social gatherings are pretty much nothing but small talk.....and unless I like you as a friend I really don't care about what goes on in your life......so yeah avoid..but I retreat into my own world every time I get bored....no matter if its a social gathering or not...sometimes my minds just blank....I like to call that pseudo coma....usually when someone tries to talk to me about something I don't care about I slip into one of those...lol
 
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