Personality Cafe banner
1 - 3 of 3 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
114 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I love the fact that INFJ's are a rare personality as it gives us a uniqueness, but one thing that's always bugged me is the lack of social confidence when in new crowded situations. I live in a very extroverted community, and so my natural quietness isn't really perceived as a good thing.

I'm wondering if there are any fellow INFJ's who have advice to offer that might help me with this problem?

Thanks :)
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
72 Posts
I'm in your shoes. People see the way I behave too retiring. I think this is normal, it's our nature. We're ourselves.
But, there are situations we must confront the problem. We can find many contexts whose characteristics require manners.
For example, we must be stay cool and outgoing/friendly in a job interview.
How to solve it?
I think, we just need acquire a habit. I mean, we must "train" our social skills going to parties, or something like that. This would increase the confidence in yourself, so it will be easier to show your "extroverted part". It doesn't mean that you became another person. It means you won't find it hard.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,962 Posts
Even if I'm going into a room where I know everyone, I am still terrified that I'm going to say, do (or fail to do) something that is going to seen to the others that makes me look unreliable, unwelcome, or foolish.

Most people go through this trait, but I feel it especially if I've been off for a day or two and am returning to work (somewhat unprepared for the socializing, noise and interaction).

When I'm put on the spot to act a certain way, I will often channel the traits of some one else :

If I need to talk to someone who is 'special needs', I'll think back to the movements, verbal and non-verbal communication and rapport of someone I last saw caring for the mentally disabled.
I'll then try to become that caregiver as much as possible in my own actions to almost seem natural at it.

Sometimes, we have to use our magical unicorn powers to fool others so we don't look nervous, out of our depth, or overwhelmed. :tongue:
 
1 - 3 of 3 Posts
Top