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Both INFPs and INFJs are both very guarded/private in their ways. But, I hypothesize that where the difference may be and why the INFP in that video was implying she would like INFJs to open up to her, is that what we crave to share with someone we really feel like has a connection with us and we can trust is our respective dominant traits.

So, if that is true, what an INFP wants to share is Fi, which encompasses their complex emotional experience which they don't normally go around sharing to the world, as well as their internal moral framework.

At the same time, what an INFJ wants to share is Ni, which is something that doesn't necessarily require external verbal communication, but more likely an internal mutual understanding, "knowing."

That's just a guess. I think I did experience that with my INxJ ex.

One thing that did really drive her crazy was that I was so nonlinear in conversation, and so enthusiastic about EVERYTHING, and how I was always looking for more possible answers and solutions and points of view and information in EVERY situation. (She was depressed at the time, but regardless,) I think that really tired her out. She also saw it as really immature. I saw her narrow-mindedness, her refusing to see anything else but her decisions, conclusions, points of view, etc., as being equally immature.
 
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Another possibility to consider is that both INFPs and INFJs strongly value meaningful human connection, but maybe because of our functions being the inverted versions of each other, what we consider meaningful vs. what we take for granted/think is surface interaction is the exact opposite of each other.

So, INFP:
"Meaningless/Surface" - Intuition/Thinking (Ne/Te)
"Meaningful/Real Connection" - Feeling/Sensing (Fi/Si)

vs. INFJ:
"Meaningless/Surface" - Feeling/Sensing (Fe/Se)
"Meaningful/Real Connection" - Intuition/Thinking (Ni/Ti)
 
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