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Oopsies! I meant INFJ and ISTJ Friendships.

I'm and INFJ and I value relationships very highly. I have 3 "True" friends. 2 of those friends I've known for 9 years and have never had an argument; we value each others views and opinions. I also have 2 "Good" friends. One of those good friends happens to be an ISTJ. A year ago I asked this ISTJ to take a personality test and she said she was an INFJ after she took it. I didn't believe her at first so I asked her to take it again and she got the same result. The reason why I didn't believe her was because we were so different and she didn't seem to fit into the description as well as I do. I shrugged it off and was open-minded about it because not everyone is the same and we've only known each other for a year and a half.

My 4 friends and I all had art together last year and it was a blast. All my friends joked around and laughed at my randomness except my ISTJ friend. She'd always say things that hurt my feelings but I didn't let that stop me from having fun. Now we are all freshmen in high school and I have no friends in my classes or lunch except with my ISTJ friend. I feel like she doesn't appreciate my thoughts and opinions as much as my other friends did. She makes me feel stupid all the time. So I started to think that maybe things were going on at home and she has a really hard time of hiding her emotions.

Anyways, on Friday I was with one of my true friends and my ISTJ friend in my medical class. We were told to sit at the computers so my true friend and I sat next to each other and there was no more computers left next to us for my ISTJ friend. Later some boys moved and I went to tell my ISTJ friend she could sit next to us before she stormed off. Then at the end of class I asked her what she thought of this one movie and she just left me.

I am a very loyal person and whenever I have a class with a friend I always wait for them. I did this with my ISTJ friend but she always left me. I hate talking to her because she's so rude and I'm thinking to myself "If she's an INFJ wouldn't she notice at least a little bit that she's hurting me?" So I did some research on ISTJs and INTJs. She always says how she would be in the Ravenclaw house and the Erudite faction (Harry Potter and Divergent).

When I read some of the weaknesses on both those types it was how they can come across as arrogant and insensitive. The only difference was that the webpage said that INTJs wonder what things "could be" instead of what things "should be." My friend is always saying things should be a certain way. That's why we'd have conflict when I talk about my ideas and thoughts on the world.

I'm pretty sure she's and ISTJ and I wanted to know if you might agree with my analysis with the little information that I gave you. Have any of you ever experienced a successful or detrimental relationship with an ISTJ. I'd also like to know ISTJs point of view on INFJs. I really want to save this relationship and I'm afraid to confront her because she pushes me away with her attitude and I've never gotten in a fight with my friends before.

Thank you!

P.S. When I asked her if anything was wrong she had a mean attitude and said nothing is wrong and why'd I asked. She became very defensive so I never brought it up again.
 

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I don't think it's possible for me to have a friendship with an ISTJ (my mother is one), but I can respect them. From a distance.
 

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I'm actually quite curious about this as well...I'm tested as an INFJ, though taking timeless' test, I'm an ISTJ.

I believe I might be borderline NF/ST, if that's even possible...I do find it hard to choose between one or the other on the "decisive" questions.

I never knew INFJs and ISTJs had such a complex relationship. I can definitely see it though, and it just makes me more confused about myself, haha.
 
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