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INFJ ideals and expectations

5936 Views 26 Replies 16 Participants Last post by  moonlight_echo
Hello Infj's.

There are many qualities about you that I admire and love. Right now I happen to be posting about one infj trait that confuses me, but don't think that I look down on you for it because we all have differing traits.

I've noticed that infj's have exceptionally high ideals when it comes to friendships and relationships of all kinds, including romantic relationships. As an infp, I would be lying if I said I don't have my own ideals, but what I've seen with infj's is that they truly expect others to live up to those ideals.

What I'm wondering is if the infj is ever aware of these expectations and ideals and how they affect their interactions. I've seen the good side and the bad side of this. The bad side led to me being declared "not good enough" in infj eyes. Is it something that changes as you mature, or is it always something you live out?
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I myself am aware of it (part of why I'm so interested in the MBTI is to find my own faults) but I imagine that if an INFJ was not looking for their own faults, they would truly believe that there is someone better out there, and that everything up to that point will be sub-par. I read somewhere that someone had never met an INFJ that wasn't obsessed with the idea of "Soul mates" because we are so concerned with looking for "the one". To get past any problem one must first acknowledge it, and I believe that many INFJ's are not aware that it is even a problem that they have too high of ideals. I myself still haven't gotten past it; I still think "The one" is out there, but the likelyhood of us meeting is so very small... I believe I will work past it eventually (I guess its something you grow out of) but right now I'm still in idealist mode.
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