I found this today searching for a completely different topic and it's an old thread, I realize that, but it applies so much to me personally that I can't resist exploring this a little further in writing.
I'm an INFJ. My dad is ENTJ. My son is ENTJ. My grandfather was INFJ.
We laugh about it how strange it is that we have this personality configuration pattern. It's every other generation. I personally loved my grandfather. My dad looked up to his quiet nature. His kindness. He was so good with people and had the most loving personality. My dad, you can see the similarity, but it is expressed differently. If we all sit at table we look so much alike it's insane. Not just in the physical sense, but in mannerisms and style. We all have this put-togetherness a certain standoffish aloofness as well, but we are all so close, and that's completely obvious to other people.
I've had an unusual journey in my life with the ENTJ personality. My dad... I love him to pieces. He's my dad. He's strong, ambitious, protective, successful, intelligent... Everything you would want in a dad. He also intimidated the hell out of me for years. It was a like a king had entered the room and if he tipped his scepter to you he meant business. As a child I was massively approval seeking. Go figure. Between my personality and being the daughter of an ENTJ everything ran perfectly. Until I was a teen and started asserting my individuality with the most headstrong and protective father under the moon. I did not understand his critical nature at all. Nothing was good enough for me. Boy did he have a hard time with letting me grow up. I can see it for what it was now.
My youngest son has been one of the most amazing blessings to me. Each of my boys have been for different reasons, but this one helped me understand my dad so much better. He's sixteen. My oldest son is an ENFP so he tends to be a little more into his own world. My youngest he has been my shadow since he could walk. He's getting to that point to where he spends much more time with friends and doing his own thing, but he still makes time to come hang out with me purposefully. We have a good relationship. We just do. He comes to me with certain personal questions. Questions about the world. About how people see things or understand things. How or why someone may not quite get his intentions or communication style. Bless his heart. He's doing so well with being kind and considering others. I know sometimes it his assertiveness can run away with him, and I don't want him to change his nature, we do work on prudence though. I've told him, "Son, I love you, you know I love you with all my heart and nothing you do will change that. Ever. But the tongue needs a driver in the seat child. Why don't you try another way of saying that with a little softer person in mind." God love him. I usually get a, "Sorry, Mom. I wasn't thinking about your feelings I was just talking. Let me see if I can think of another way." I call it the reboot. Let's reboot and start this over. He laughs. He knows I'm not mad at him or judging him, I just want him to have the best future he can have and he will need his friends and strong relationships. That's my main concern. That's what I do.
I've learned so much from him. How soft and kind and tender an ENTJ really is. How shy they can actually be. How uncomfortable they can be with expressing their feelings. I've been able to talk to him about not judging how he expresses his feelings. To focus on how people want to be loved and how they express love because there are so many ways. To make sure that whoever he cares about understands that he cares about them. If that's through affection, gifts, actions, spoken word... (Yes, I explained the love languages to him.) I feel like I'm betraying something here, but I also know that if his experience helped someone else he would be willing to share. ENTJ's have the most beautiful spirits, and the part that they don't show the whole world is so soft and genuine. When you meet that part of them it's like a breath of fresh air. This is much easier to see as a mother than as a daughter.
My Dad is reaching his 70's. His grandson is a little more open than he is. A little more trusting. A little more willing to listen. I think, when the two of them are together, my son reminds my Dad of his highest good. And my Dad shows my son developed thought, experience, and tempered wisdom.
I'm really quite glad to be part of this family. It's an honor. And I've seen the difference the quiet role of the INFJ makes. And personally, I have learned a lot about integrity and strength from the men in my life.