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Well. What the fuck.

I've seen this before. These kind of changes for the good of the forum sorts of things. They're usually flashy strips (made to look pretty, but with less functionality) pitched out when a forum (or whatever) is circling the drain. A desperate attempt to try to bring in new blood from without.

And it might. A little. But if also alienates a whole shit load of current users, of which there aren't many left, which is why the place(s) are circling the drain in the first place.

And then... hey... there's a premium! Give us money or we'll blast you with advertisements!

I just have to say, such things do not typically bode well for the forum (blog site, whatever) once this kind of shit starts to happen. And, let's be honest here... PerC has been circling the drain for quite a little while now... I don't post or read too much outside of this particular thread, but when I do? Place is fucking dead. Barely any new threads and it's the same small group of people starting/posting on what there is.

The ads are annoying, but easily remedied. But they want you to pay for that, plus some "premium" forums.

Uh. No.

I also may have mentioned that I dislike change. A lot. This has thrown my feng shui all outta sorts. I hate it. Will I stay and continue rambling here? Probably. For a while, at least. In that time, I'll either get used to it or I will decide to move on to a different venue. Maybe go back to my old blog and resurrect it or something. Or maybe start a new one or maybe just fuck it all together. It's hard to say.

It's my last night. Huzzah for that, at least. Last night was my outta sort nights since I was on max and not my normal unit. I will never get used to being there... unless I'm assigned there, every day, for a complete rotation. It's been so long since that's been my assigned unit (four or five years... six?) that being over there is like being a stranger in a strange land.

And the paperwork is always always always a fucking mess. What a fucking shit show. The past two days, a part timer was over there... so, it was even more fucked up than normal. Stuff where it wasn't supposed to be, some paperwork in the wrong place, with the wrong inmates and some just not done at all. (I think he accidently missed some, I don't think he did it on purpose) Took me probably 30 mins just to find every thing and unfuck it so that I could do my paperwork and get everything squared away as it's supposed to be.

Laundry was ridiculous because whomever works over there on the day shifts (no idea) apparently just goes and gets them whatever extra stuff they want. (They're not supposed to have extra anything. It's a safety and security issue and because of a past incident, extra clothing in their cells is a violation of Federal Jail Standards... but we have weak staff that give them whatever they want so they don't have to do their jobs.)

I had a metric shit ton of stuff to take back. Took me nearly an hour and a half just to fold and sort the shit. (It's not even a full unit, for the record. Half full.) And... I was pretty much over it by then. Seriously. Just too fucking much and most of it stuff nobody wears. Like the 4xl shirt I took back, for one thing. Nobody on that unit wears over size xl, but here we have a 4xl shirt in the laundry. Hmmmmmmmm... :rolleyes:

I don't like these emojis, for the record. No more cheers or head banging? Fuck you, PerC. 🖕

I'll probably have some uses for that one. It needs to be bigger, though. Seriously. Let that fucker fly.

My night was mostly boring, though. I thought about writing or reading and did neither. I completed the large crossword from the newspaper. Fortunately, nobody else had tried to make a go of it, because most of the people who do the crosswords don't do them well and it's annoying as fuck to come along behind them and have to scribble all over their wrong answers.

I don't like scribbling.

And yes... there are more than one set of newspapers in the building. 1) can't always find them, sometimes they're thrown away (or taken home by staff) before 3rd shift ever gets there and 2) someone will always fuck with the crossword puzzles. I might've found another one, but likely someone would've already had a go at it. It's difficult to find one that nobody's touched. This one was free and clear, so I was very excited to be able to complete it!

I almost always complete them, for the record. I'm not an ace crossworder, but I am very good. I couldn't find a copy of the little crossword. There's a large and small crossword in each newspaper. The small one is... it's so easy. It barely takes me five minutes to fill one out. The larger one is from the LA Times, I think. It's harder. They're not terribly hard, but... sometimes they take a while to suss out. They'll get me stuck from time to time, mostly because I'm over thinking the clue. When I get stuck, I tend to put them aside for a while and go do something else. Usually when I return, I figure it out. Last night was like that. I had two questions (interconnected on the grid, of course) and by damn if I couldn't quite pull up what I needed.

Finally, I pulled up the answer. I needed a Musketeer that wasn't Aramis. All I could pull up was Porthos and that didn't fit. I could not pull up the 3rd Musketeer to save my ass. I went off and did a few things, came back and dropped Athos into the answer...whilst calling myself a dumbass, cuz it was kinda obvious when you get right down to it... and the fact that I still couldn't pull it up just annoyed the shit outta me!

I have (9) on my PerC header... thingy. That's interesting. It's probably from the bitchfest happening on the we changed the forum thread. shrugs

Hopefully, tonight goes by quickly. Last night did not. I have to go visit my dentist in the morning. Didn't know that until just a bit ago when I discovered a message on my machine. Hmmmmmmm. I don't even know when my original appointment was for? It may have just been for this day, but usually my spring appointment is around my birthday in April, so... I dunno. I honestly don't remember. I think I went later in the year last fall, though, too. So... I dunno.

They were sure late notifying me, though. Usually I get an email like two weeks in advance. And then a text the week before. I got nothing until today. A message on my answering machine (yes, I still have one) and two on my mobile... all wanting me to confirm my appointment. Which didn't happen as I didn't wake up until after their business hours.

Apparently, they've forgotten I work 3rd shift. Hence the emails and texts. Silly rabbits.

I'll all good. I'm sure my girl will show up for me. She comes in early for me (before business hours) because she feels sorry for me sleeping in the parking lot, particularly during the cold months. I'm finished and walking out the door just as they're opening up for the day. I like that. No hassles!

Leave you with this... cuz, it makes me smile.

http://youtu.be/puQdoC2E50s

I dunno if that actually works, but... whatever. Just know I tried iffin it didn't!

ps: Peekaboo, I see yoooooooooooooou. 👀
 

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My video link stuck. But it was just the link, not the video.

Not sure if I did it wrong or if that's just the way it is now. Le sigh. I don't like this new format. At all. 🖕

My mom went to the doc yesterday and something's wrong with her heart. It's swishy. Well. Making swishy noises. Which likely means there is an issue with a valve. Heart murmur is one thing. A swishy heart murmur is another all together. They've got to run tests and all that nonsense to see what's what, of course. Then decide where to go from there... if it's a medication thing or a surgical thing.

So, now my mom is getting her affairs in order, as it were, and talking about dying and stuff. Which... it's logical, eh? You're about 80, you've got something weird and not quite right going on with your heart... shit happens. Why not be prepared? She wants to get all of her wishes in writing now, so that decisions don't have to be made by us kids in the heat of the moment. Which is very smart and actually quite kind when you think about it.

No decisions to make, as they're already made. Decisions can be hard. Especially those kind.

I can't say that her talking about this upset me, as such, but... it made me more uncomfortable than I would've thought it would. I'm not sure why? It's all perfectly logical and it's not like I don't know this is coming... for both of my parents. I've written here about what time they have left (5 to maybe 10 yrs) and I'm extremely aware that it could be tomorrow or 10 years down the road.

And yet? Still a bit uncomfortable. And I think I was made more uncomfortable by the fact that I was uncomfortable. If that makes sense? I was thinking about it, the uncomfortable bit, whilst she was still talking to me... and yeah. It was weird. She's talking about getting her affairs in order and I'm over there self analyzing. 🥴

Yes, I know it's my mom and that all these things are normal. I'm not surprised by that. Most surprised that it was uncomfortable, because it shouldn't be. And yes, I know... it's because it's my mom talking. I know. I do.

So. Yeah. That's a thing now. Huzzah.

Work was boring but went by quickly enough, I suppose. It's over, anyway, so there ya go.

Dentist was good. Except they made me gargle with jet fuel before the would do anything to my mouth. I assume it's a 'rona thing, as they've never done that before. Good grief, about burnt the fuck outta my mouth! Especially under my tongue for some reason. And then when I finally got to spit it (you have to have a go for 30 seconds), the little bits that were left over and swallowed were disgusting. I told my girl that had I known they were going to do that, I'd have just brough a bottle of Jameson... wouldn't have burnt so much and would've tasted better!

But, everything was good. Future zombie skin site had not deteriorated further, so that's good news. I'm still waiting for Todd to get his ass off modified duty so I can have that wee bit of oral surgery done. Who knows when that's going to be? Not I, certainly. Hopefully, it won't be too long. With my luck? Another 6 months... because that's just how my life works.

Had a friend text me for 411 on a situation involving her husband's dad and a former foster kid of his, who's now in prison. I think I got the situation sussed out for them, as far as what is likely going on and what can or cannot be done and who to contact about it all... so hopefully, that turns out well. Her husband's father is 81 and has cancer and doesn't need this kind of shit going on.

These are the kind of text messages I often get out of the blue. They're either legal questions or questions about legal affairs, law enforcement, jail and the like... OR... they're questions on someone's child's behavior and what to do about it. Because working in my field quite obviously makes you an expert in all of those things. :unsure:

I always try to help people out, when they ask though... chances are that in some situations I may actually know more than they do and if not, I can point them to someone else who can be more helpful. I don't mind trying to help people out. If they ask, I'll answer... I often have to say that it's just my opinion, because quite often it is just that. Informed opinion, perhaps, but still an opinion.

The legal questions thing make sense. I work in the law enforcement arena. I know things. It's a bi product of working in the field. Even if you don't want to know things, you'll end up knowing just by default.

The weird one is when people ask me why their kid is behaving the way they are. Particularly if I've never even met the kid before. It's a very weird thing to me. I work with kids, yes. I work with kids from all manner of backgrounds and all manner of development (or lack thereof)... I've done it for nearly 25 yrs now. That doesn't make me an expert, by any stretch. I've not studied any bit of child development or child psychology or anything like that. I can only work from my experiences which come from working with at risk/delinquent youth...that's what I deal with on the daily.

So, it's strange to me that a parent, who's lived with their child from birth until whatever point in time we're at, thinks I know more about what's going on with their kid than they do. That's just weird as fuck to me. I do try to help them out. I let them ask, give what feedback I feel comfortable giving and hope they feel reassured. But it is a very odd thing to me. Very odd, indeed.

Anyway. I think I'm off to watch some tv for a while before heading off to bed. I slept for a while today and then went outside for about 10 mins after chow. That was all it took to shoot my allergies into death mode. Makes me feel unwell and sleepy. Damn it.

Trying a video again. Maybe it'll actually work right this time. Or not. Who knows.

The Fields of Athenry

 

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I'm not a fan of the new layout much. I'm sure it may be better from a GDPR standpoint or for moderators to manage but I don't like how everything is packed in and difficult to find plus I miss the personality summaries for each member and the ability to privatise certain information like posts on your profile. Oh, well...
 

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Maybe a shorty. Waiting (hoping) for the sun to come out.

So far, all it has done on my extended holiday weekend is rain. That's lovely. I don't mind so much, but the pups? They'd really like to go outside and play. Since it rained like hell last night, I really need the sun to come out a bit more (it's trying!) so some of that mud can dry up a bit. I don't want to have to bathe dogs at the end of the day.

I'm ready to be outside, too.

Last night, there were near tornado situations here. The weather peeps popped up all panicked... lots of strong rotation over the city. Saw some video (from citiziens) this morning of funnel clouds and what not. Nothing made the ground, there just wasn't enough energy, I don't think... it was only in the mid 60s, after all. Had it been in the 80s, there'd have been a lot more energy generated and we may have had a tornado in the city.

It wasn't close to me, really... the south of the city is quite a little way from my town. So, I went back to gaming. Kept an ear out, though... listening for hail on the stove pipe and sirens... cuz you just never around here during this time of the year. Best to just pay attention when the weather's being all wonky donkey.

The pups allowed me to sleep in, which is a shocker. Didn't get up until 1130a... which is pretty late these days. Usually the wee pup gets me up about 0730 and almost never later than 0930. Dunno what was up with that, but I'm glad for it. I didn't stay up wicked late last night or anything... so... I dunno.

I did try to have a migraine last night. It started whilst I was gaming, so I had to quit. I went and laid on the couch and watched tv for a while. And it went away... until I was upright again, then it started to come back. Damn it.

Pounding head or no, I decided to grill a burger at 0130 this morning. Because... why not? Some see it as a lot of work for a hamburger, but... goddamn that was a good hamburger! Got that all nice and grilled up, got all the goodies to add to it... pickles and onions and lettuce and cheese... mmmmmmmmm...

Took a bunch of ibuprofen, ate my burger, then went off to bed around 0200.

Now it's just waiting for this stupid sun to come out so we can go out in the yard to play. I even bought the wee pup three new discs yesterday. During the summer months (well, warm months anyway) I buy about 3 discs every two weeks. They're cloth discs (I don't like throwing the plastic ones... it's a sensory thing) and eventually, he decides to dismantle them. He doesn't (start) doing it on purpose... but once it starts coming apart, he just destroys it.

When he's out by himself, he still plays with his disc (he's a bit obsessive!), he'll throw it in the air, run around with it in his mouth... and sometimes when he goes to pick it up when it's lying on the ground, he can't get a good hold of it, so he'll use his paws to drag it... try to flip it up. That's how the get torn up... him constantly pawing at them... cuz it's pretty aggressive pawing. And once it starts coming apart? Well... it's just a matter of time before it's completely destroyed.

I get the Tractor Supply Company discs at TSC... that's where I get their food (much closer than driving into the city!) and so they're not very expensive... maybe $6? So... yeah. About $10 a week to keep the wee pup in discs!

A tad bit ridiculous, really, but... man he loves his discs! He's always so, so happy. $10 a week for a happy, happy pup isn't that much, I don't think.

Someone sent me a meme that went like this;

TV: CDC says to refrain from handshakes
Jeffrey Dahmer: Stops blender Awwwww


Dunno why, but that hit me right in my funny bone. So wrong and yet? So damn funny.
 

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OH MAN. The most random thoughts I ever have are like the weirdest statistics I wish I could know. Like, how many ppl do this or that. Like something very small and there is no way to even figure out. Like "How many people in the world are eating avocados right now?" OH. I also used to think that I was thinking about someone who was thinking about me.

Like ok,

Here is the concept or thought. ok. it's hard to explain fully. "I am thinking that there is an anonymous person, who thinks there is a person (me) who is thinking of them (other person), but all I know is that the person is thinking the same thing (having that same thought), so at that moment we are 100% thinking of each other." I hope I explained it in a way that can be understood.

Ok that person out there is thinking of me. And right now I'm thinking of them. Only because we both acknowledging that the only thing we know about each other is that we're having the same thought. And at this moment we are thinking of each other.

I also had a weird thought that what if I imagined a random child born on a random day in a random country at a random time. Then I go and find that person 20 years later and said "I was thinking about you the moment you were born." Wouldn't that be the most insane thing ever? or am I just insane? Sorry it all makes sense in my head.
omg yesss like is there someone thinking about me thinking about them thinking about me thinking about them and neither of us know who each other are i still do that, people are always telling me to turn my brain off and tune out for a bit but it just dosnt work like that for an infj. They don't know......
 

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Today is my little brother's birthday.

Mi mejor amigo. Forty four years old today. :oops:

And to me, he's still a baby.

And that's the crazy thing, no? He's almost 50. But... it doesn't seem like it. It doesn't seem like he's a day over 16. It probably never will, I suppose. He's Peter Pan in my eyes, because he's my brother. My baby brother, yeah?

He makes me so proud, you have no idea. I don't have the words for it, so I can't tell you either.

My dad's birthday is tomorrow. It's weird that he's a year shy of 80. My parents do no look or act like old fuckers. Which is why it's hard to see them as old fuckers, eh? Aging is such a weird fucking thing. You'll find out one day, young 'uns... just how fucking weird it is.

The day? Well... no work, so that's good. But the weather was shit. I did get the pups outside for maybe three hours. We came in because it was near to chow time and because it started making thunder and other nonsense like that. But at least they got some time to be outside.

Have a four day weekend and it rains every fucking day. Goddamn, man.

Oh well. Tonight is the last night off. It's stay up all night and do whatever and sleep all day... that's what's on my agenda. Damn near did that yesterday. Stayed up till about 0400 and slept till noon. Staying up all night tonight shouldn't be too hard to do, really. We'll see, though. Sometimes one thinks that and one is quite wrong.

Memorial Day weekend here in the states. Second holiday in a row the family hasn't celebrated. Quite odd. I think it's part 'rona stuff and partly the fact that now the kids work... nights and all manner of nonsense. The boy's been working mandatory 12 hr shifts for... months. I don't know how many hours a shift is for the girl child, but I doubt many nurses put in a straight eight hour shift, especially noobs.

So. Yeah.

Not that it really matters anyway. As much as I love our (immediate) family gatherings, the truth is that they've been slowly dying out for a while now. Mostly, a holiday now consists of everyone gathered together for an hour or so, everyone staring at their phones... then dinner (or lunch)... and then another hour or so of everyone staring at their phones. Then everyone goes back from whence they came.

So. I guess the whole gathering thing is kinda pointless anyway. Not like anything's going on that couldn't be done at home, after all. And... it's not me in the phone. I rarely bring one to family gatherings. I mean, we usually gather at my next door neighbor's house, after all. Why do I need my phone? I don't, so I don't bring it. I'm the only one.

So, yeah. Before long I expect we'll not gather for anything. That day will be a sad day, but... whatever. That's how life works, innit? Things from the past just kinda fade off into the sunset after a while.

And eventually, it'll likely be just me all by myself. With my puppos. And by then, I expect I probably won't care anymore... particularly if I move away from this place or caravan my way through retirement. There will be a lot of change within the family in the next 5 to 10 yrs, no doubt about that.

C'est la vie, no?

Not much else going on. Not sure whether I want to game for a while or watch some tv first. I should probably watch tv first, so I don't fall asleep. :p But... not sure I feel like it, honestly. Though I say it would be nice to cuddle under the blanket. I've had to go put on sleeping pantalones because pantalones cortos weren't cutting it down here in the cave. Had to put on a long sleeve shirt, too.

Fucking air conditioning is freezing me outta the house! (It was so humid here today, had no choice but to run the a/c so we wouldn't suffocate inside) I've got me hospital slippers on my toes, my pajama pants on over my sleeping shorts and a long sleeve shirt on over a tee. It's the kinda chilly down here in the cave.

Had a most awsome pizza from the Casey's General Store tonight. I like that I can order online and pay for it all and pick a time and then just go have my mom pick it up. Today at least. Actually, she's went and picked it up every time we've done it, which is three whole times.

At any rate... there's good breakfast waiting for me in the fridge later. Mmmmmmmm... cold pizza!
 

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During time of Corona virus has given me lots of time to sit and ponder things. I actually haven't minded it that much. It has showed me what a simpler life can be like and I have to say that I don't mind it. I have appreciated slowing down and not spending so much time away from home. It has allowed me to confirm what I suspected. That it isn't just work that causes stress in my life; it is also my hobbies and time outside of work. Preparing for hobbies can take up a lot of time and energy and I question whether the outcome is worth all of the preparation and then clean up after wards. I don't want to totally give up hobbies but I do think that in the future I want to do them less. When I I got to go hiking again, I appreciated it so much more because I hadn't been doing it all of the time. I recently bought a fishing rod and have went out fishing twice. I think I will supplement my hiking with fishing. I still like hiking, but because of I have done it so much it has lost it's new shiny appeal that it once had. I still get some great experiences hiking but they aren't as common as they used to be. I think a lot of that has to do with I have done it more. It also doesn't help that it is becoming so much more popular and there are way more people doing it.

One thing about Corona virus that has been nice is that it shows that if we make changes are environment can start to rebound and repair it self. We haven't hit that point of no return yet. Some places have gotten to see blue sky and clear water again for the first time in a long time. One thing I have been pondering a lot is that I think that our hobbies and recreation are doing more dammage to the planet than the things we need to do. I drive more for my hobbies and buy so much gear which is made all over the world and transported here. During corona virus I have used way less gas and bought way less shit. Oil and gas gets such a bad reputation but what about tourism? I don't understand how it doesn't seem to get demonized like oil and gas does. Tourism is responsible for so much carbon emissions and material possessions, but yet it seems to fly under the radar and be able to get away with it. I think that is starting to change a bit though.
 

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Haha you crack me up. This made my day.:giggle: I'm sorry it takes me so long to get back! Holy biscuits have things changed on PerC since I last checked in. :oops: I hope you are doing well!!
 
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