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It is almost 7 am and I woke up because my cat wanted to enter the house... little guy who doesn't care if it is warm or cold outside, day or night...he just goes. It is all silent, only crows to hear...I just love crows! ...and actually I feel like I'm still sleeping...but I don't remember when is the last time I was awake early in the morning which is pity because I was always feeling like morning is my time...and for this reason I kind of don't want to fall asleep. It is funny because the warmth and softness of my bad are soooo much calling me...but if I fall asleep I will miss these beautiful silent moments when everyone is sleeping and I just love it. :giggle: So funny, because it is opposite of what it was when I was going to fall asleep...I was more like "Let's fall asleep so I don't need to exist." but right now it is so good to feel my existence. So I'm curious how will continue my day. :')
 

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Sitting here waiting on Dell tech to call me at my scheduled time (today between 0700-0800).

They called yesterday. Three times. Left messages and everything. Despite the fact that I specifically picked today for them to call because it's my only open morning this week. I'm figuring the probability of them calling today is about nil.

They've 26 mins left... if they miss the call time today, Rahul is going to get a nasty email.

We'll see, I guess.

In other news...

There isn't much honestly. There's a slightly out of control pandemic about and so... yeah. Not a very exciting schedule, I'm afraid. 1) Wake up... 2) Eat... 3) Shower... 4) Go to work... 5) Come home... 6) Go to bed. Rinse/repeat.

There's some gaming tossed in there and hanging with the pups, some tv watching (well, sleeping through things on tv, at any rate) and... yeah. That's the all of it. Don't go anywhere (work), don't see anyone (coworkers), don't do shit.

And, I'm generally ok with that. It's not my nature to be social and this pandemic stuff is an excuse to stay my ass at home with a built in reason to avoid other human beans... but it isn't a very exciting existence, I have to say. Not that I want exciting... but you know what I mean. Nothing changes, days run together... blah, blah, blah fuckity blah...

Joe was at work for the first time in 15 yrs. He's the former employee now returned as a supervisor to 3rd shift. I hope he does well. He's a nice guy and I'd hate to see the place chew him up and spit him out. It pretty much did the first time 'round, that's why he left. And now he's back. The damn fool.

He'll probably better at it than Autumn... not that it would take a lot for that to be the case, sadly. I'm still not certain she will successfully complete her probationary period. My guess is she will, just so they don't have to hire/train yet another person. Plus she's a double tick minority... black/female. Our director loves multiple tick minority hires. (She's especially fond of black lesbians... triple tick!!!)

I spent my night in central control writing a story. Well, the beginnings of one, at least. XCOM 2 based... cuz why not? And I've been on an XCOM 2 kick the past few days. I do so love that game...


I have no idea where I'm going with it all, but the game provides good material... why not spend my time sitting in control writing? Did make the night go by lickety split, that's for sure.

Of course, if it's anything like most that I've ever written, I'll get bored with it long before I finish. But so what? Gives me something to do... I've only got one book left, after all.

Just an update on Rahul at Dell... he called. Not on time, but not terribly late (15 mins)... and the problem is fixed, though he said he didn't do anything and that all the software was fine. Which is odd, because I didn't do anything, either... and yet? We have sound. Go fucking figure!

Whatever. I'm just happy that shit works the way it's supposed to again. Not having my external speakers working was driving me slightly mad, if you must know. Kinda like end of the world sorta mad, though it really wasn't. More annoying than end of the world, but still. It was causing me to be... cranky, shall we say? Yeah.

All right... well, gonna go play XCOM for a minute. See if the sound still works after... because, even though it seems fixed, I'm afraid it'll stop working again... because that would be my luck.
 

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I slept much better today knowing my sound was fixed. Either Rahul did something or... Magic. Don't know, don't care. It works now and that's all that matters.

I am tired tonight and I don't know why, honestly. Probably still some of that adapting to living in the dark 24/7 and probably some of it may be end of the week fatigue. Whatever it is, I could go to bed right now and sleep through until morning and... need every bit of it.

The real drowsy feeling will wear off after I'm moving around a bit and get to work and what not. But still. Annoying.

As for work...

Forgot about the 'rona there... it's running through the facility, finally. Anne and Karen have had it and returned to work, Archie (2nd shift) and Cassie (part timer) both have it and three of the youthful offenders are positive now, as well. (From Archie... Archie brought this last bit in and worked in the area where the three sick boys are housed. Cassie, being a part timer, works wherever... she was in that area and... boom.)

For the record, Archie isn't young... nor does he come across as a partier. He's a weird looking, short dude... hard to say how old he is... could be a few years younger than me, could be several years older. He seems to wear his mask as he's supposed (whether he does that outside of work is anyone's guess. Red state here, so wearing masks isn't as common as it should be, thanks to the issue being politicized.) though he was always swiping at his nose...

Who knows. I just know I'm glad I'm in central control. 1) My exposure is very limited. (People who are working in the area where the boys are now housed, booking, or in the unit they came from are not allowed in control or other units to try to keep down cross contamination.) 2) I don't have to do all that "covid cleaning". Once an hour... the units are to be wiped down. Frankly, I think that's a bit of overkill for 3rd shift, since the delinquents are in their cells, but I don't run the place... so there ya go.

I'm also not sure how staff on the units are watching their inmates whilst cleaning every hour... and that's not counting the bathrooms. Every time I bathroom is used, it has to sit empty for 15 mins... then it is to be bleached (walls, floors, surfaces) and then left to sit empty for another 15 mins before someone else can use it.

How staff gets anything done, or keeps an eye on their inmates is beyond me. There's no possible way. We do not have the staffing to do all that cleaning and be watching the inmates, which is our actual job.

I might do the same cleaning, but the units would be on full lockdown status. In their rooms 23 hrs a day... the staff has time to clean and sanitize and the inmates are locked down, so they can't cause stir when nobody's looking. Plus they're all away from each other, so spread is less likely.

But we won't do that.

I also have a good story about kids. Probably really won't mean much to all y'all, but it really made my day on Monday. I was at pt, chillin' with my normal early morning peeps (generally high school kids doing pt before school) and in walks this teenager with his leg in a brace, all wrapped up and gingerly walking on crutches. Mom and dad are there as well. (I assume they were mom and dad because they were there and very interested in what was going to happen, but they are not of the same race as the boy.)

I know this kid is on the football team. Couldn't tell you his name... but I recognized his eyes. (I sometimes have a hard time recognizing the players without their helmets, to be honest) So... I was doing my beginning lifting and eavesdropping, because that's what you do in pt... you do you and watch and listen to what else is going on with everyone else.

After a while, the boy is moved to some stairs to practice a couple steps up and down. (He must've just had surgery maybe the day before because he was awkward with the crutches) Then they moved him to an exercise bike sort of thing... and got him set up to (barely) pedal that. After the folks left him to just pedal whilst the adults talked, he looked up and saw me... and this huge smile broke out across his face. He was grinning like the Cheshire Cat and then gave me the nod. Which I returned.

And it made my day because he recognized me from my being on the field taking photos and obviously seeing me made him smile. Which in turn made me smile. Pretty much for the rest of the day.

One of the other boys that is in early, also for a knee, recognized me as well. Not the same reaction, but I know he recognized me because he straight stared at me the entire time I was there on the first day. I've talked to him a little bit here and there and know that he is a junior (missed this entire season, just like me, poor kid) so I'll likely see him on the field next year... assuming the 'rona nonsense is better under control by then.

Sometimes, it's the smallest of things, innit?
 

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It's the last day of the work week. Yahoo!

And tomorrow is supposed to be 75F. Crazy fucking weather. Cold, warm, cold, warm. Seriously... I enjoy the breaks with the unseasonable warmth, but all the back 'n forth wreaks havoc with my migraines and my allergies, thanks. Though I'm still not going to complain... I'll take the 70s in November any time. (And Dec, Jan, Feb, March, etc.)

All the supervisors were on board last night; Kelly, Autumn and Joe. Joe was training with Kelly, of course. He sat and talked with me for maybe an hour and a half at one point. I mean... he's not like a new bloke, I've known him for 22 yrs... I just haven't seen him for a while. (7 yrs... I had thought it had been 7 or 8 yrs, but then Kelly said it was 15 yrs... but Joe confirmed it was actually 7yrs.) I mean... we've been in touch over the years, don't get me wrong... but we've not had a sit down, face to face in quite a little while.

Our chat ended when Autumn came to show him what I do... which, honestly? I about hurt myself not bursting out with a good guffaw, as they say. What she does? 🤨😉

Mercy me. I am going to hurt myself holding all this shit in. Seriously.

I was about to snap on one of the girl's from the other agency last night... three times... three... she went from their unit to the front break room. This requires me to make eight door actions (4 up, 4 back)... and I'd have no problem with that if she stayed in the front (the front break room/administration/lobby/ect) for five, ten, fifteen, twenty minutes.

But no... she was outside the secure perimeter for about... 30 seconds... and then she'd go all the way back to the unit. Because all she was doing when she was in the admin break room was grabbing a drink out of the fridge. The fridge is about... 15 ft from the door that enters that area. So... literally, 30 seconds. Maybe 45 seconds, tops.

And she did that three times. This is frustrating for multiple reasons. You're causing unnecessary work for the person in control. You're making unnecessary movements through the facility. And the biggest one? There's a breakroom and a fridge on the secure side which would require me to open one door (x2, going & coming) and that breakroom is far closer to the one your dragging your carcass to, repeatedly.

The thing that some people don't understand is that a jail or a prison is not a place where you just... go willy nilly strolling about the place for no rhyme or reason. Movement, particularly through doors that have to be opened by central control, is to be kept to a minimum.

1) You never know when shit's going to hit the fan. 2) The person in central controls the entire building and they are actually more in charge of things in an emergency than the supervisor is. 3) Control needs to know where everyone in the facility is, at all times. This is hard to do if you're constantly running all over the goddamn building. 4) All of our staff carry radios... not everyone else does. (The lead for the other agency carries a radio to communicate with us, but none of the rest of their staff do. The janitor does not have a radio. The nurses do, the principle and his secretary do, none of the school staff carry radios.) Control needs to know who is in the building and where they are in case of a catastrophic event. (Which would most likely be a major fire or a weather event, like a tornado here.)

I didn't snap on her... but I wanted to stab her in the throat. Or, at the very least, be more than just a little bit rude. I contained myself, but goddamn was it difficult. And I did talk to their lead... like... dude... c'mon. There's a fridge in the back that doesn't require all that movement. Seriously.


I'm generally not a rude person, I don't want to snap on people. But sometimes, man... people just work that last nerve and the older I get the less kindly I suffer fools. The pent up sarcasm... some days, it's painful there's so much of it. And sometimes, the pain goes away because some poor slob gets shot with it.

Grumpy old man. 🤘
 

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The days off went quickly. Sad, that. Not much to be done for it, though. Just push through.

I've no applications in anywhere at the moment. There's nothing worthy of my time. I mean, if I'm going to get a fuck off email for my troubles, I want it to be from a worthy place, yeah? And there's not much out there.

My lil bro sent me a link for a job at the school in his town, not the school where he is principal, but the school he formerly taught at. It was managing the janitors and bus drivers. Managerial, salaried, bennies and what not. But... it's an hour away. The pay cut would be severe (no mention of the salary, but it's a very small school district and that = small pay) and then to have to drive an hour to get there? In shit weather in the winter? No... unfortunately. If I were closer or the job were closer... maybe, I'd probably get it, I'm sure my brother has some pull there, but... it's too far away.

And that's the extent of that.

Early Thursday morning (just prior to 0400) whilst I was in central control... the whole damn thing went down. All of it. I used my cell phone to call Kelly's office. (Not even thinking of the bank of radios in the chargers just down the way from me! :rolleyes:) I lost all computers, all monitors, all cameras, the base radio and the phone. All gone... buh-bye.

That's fun. 😉

I kinda wish that girl that from the other agency that was running about the place for no good reason a couple days ago had been doing so at the time... and got locked in a vestibule somewhere. That would've been so much karma! ;) Didn't happen, of course.. but a fella can dream, eh?

There was a critical failure in the battery back up... the system is old (19 yrs) and there's been little maintenance over the years, because that costs money. The maintenance guy(s) jerry rig and duct tape and keep things running with bailing wire, like old school farmers, basically. (Not with actual duct tape and bailing wire, mind you, but with parts repeatedly repaired, used parts, etc and so forth.) Nothing is ever completely and truly repaired until there's a catastrophic failure and then we think about it a bit... (months, maybe years) and then we fix it.

They have been waiting on a new battery back up for several months, the maintenance guy told me... like... most of this year kind of months and they're not even to the part of taking bids yet. So... yay!

What myself and the maintenance guy believe (based on our powers of deduction and the info I was able to report from myself and others) that a brief power blip (outtage) kicked on the battery back up... which then did not kick back off when the power cycled back on (less than a second, time wise) so the entire control center was running on the battery back up... until if failed, crashing the entire system.

The battery back up should've kicked the system back to the main when the power went on, but it didn't. We think this is what happened because Todd told me that about 15" before Kelly called for everyone to stop moving, the lights flicked briefly. When this happened, an electronic lock on the secure break room door stopped functioning (no power). The maintenance guy believes this is when power was lost briefly and the system went on to back up... which has enough juice to run central control for approximately 15".

Now... whether or not that's what actually happened? The world may never know. (I probably won't, at least.)

Once we had power back, there was some work that had to be done to get all the systems back up and running. We had a terrible time getting all the cameras/monitors working again. The maintenance guy doesn't know much about the actual system... me? I'm just reasonably computer literate, have no precise knowledge of how to make things go when they're not... but between the two of us (with on manuals, I'll have you know...) we managed to get the entire system back online and working properly. (Which the person called to come in at 0500 in the morning was eternally grateful to hear... Does that mean I can go back to bed? Yes. I love you. You're welcome. 😁)

I've got a couple more weeks of modified duty left. I don't know if they'll extend me anymore after my upcoming appointment or not. I'd like them to... mostly because being in control makes me not hate my job so much, but... I'm going to get kicked out sooner or later, that time is drawing near. Yippee skippy.

I only work four days this week, cuz I took Wednesday off for the Thanksgiving. Cuz why not? It's a paid holiday for me... so... yeah. Free day off, as it were.

As for Thanksgiving, not really sure how that's playing out. Mom is just planning on snatching a plate and coming home, so as not to interact with my dad (who goes to the bar every day, wouldn't go to the doctor if he was sick, and doesn't do a lot of other things one should do to keep infection possibilities low), my niece (who's an RN and who's boyfriend has his brother living with him... she fears they're out getting covidy all over the place) and my nephew who works in the state penitentiary system which is full of covid, both inmates and staff.)

There is covid at my facility, too. Currently, three youthful offenders are down with it. Four staff have had it, but have recovered. I can't tell this to my mom or I'll be living in a motel somewhere for the rest of the pandemic. And she'd be constantly worried sick about me and about her getting it and... yeah. Just info better kept to one's self. (I am careful because I don't want to bring it home to her... nor do I wish to have it, thanks.)

I don't know what I'll do. I want to hang out. But I may not just because she's so skeeved out. I mean, what's the point in her coming home, if I stay over there?

🦚 <---- Pretend that's a turkey.

Whatever. I guess it doesn't matter. I still have three days off and so... whatever. I think I'm going to try to get my hair cut as well as it's bordering on the ridiculous right now.

870866


It's about like that up there... it's gone to ridiculous, it has. It needs to be gone away. And soon. Shit keeps getting into my mask, which then has it end up in my mouth, which is not a good thing for someone who's thoroughly grossed by hair, even if it belongs to them, but especially when it's in my mouth, yeah?

Also, I'm quite amazed the Google knew what I meant when I googled men's long short hair. Onya, Google.
 

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Lord Dampnut's off doing exactly what I said he was going to do. Not just me, others said it, too.

The going on and on and on about election fraud prior to the actual election... just putting that seed into stupid people's heads so he could claim the election fraudulent if/when he lost. Which... he lost and he's now doing exactly that.

Though, honestly, as many sad pouty faces as I see (when he shows his face, which isn't often now), whilst I think he put this seed out intentionally to cast doubt on the election results, I don't think he actually thought he'd lose. Or maybe he did? I don't know... it's hard to tell.

His self esteem is obviously very low... but yet, he brags on himself so much that despite that, I think he actually starts to believe his own bullshit... and then you have the circus monkeys that follow the clown around, swinging on his dick like he's an actual god or something...

I dunno. He's a very strange man. He sucks at most things in life. Except marketing himself. He definitely excels, there. I'm not sure how or why, but... well... some of it is the stupid of the American people. (What's that they say about never underestimating the power of stupid in large groups?)

Whatever. I'll just be glad when he crawls back into whatever hole he crawled out of and I can go back to not paying any attention to his existence. Which will make my brain happier. It doesn't do well with stupid, you know.

I'm really glad that Autumn wasn't the only supervisor on Thursday morning when central control went down. That'd have been an absolute shit show. Also... I'm glad I was the one in central control when it went down. I hadn't really even thought about until Todd said to me that it was a good thing it was me and not him or Billy or Rita... because none of them are even remotely computer literate. And... yeah. He's right.

So imagine a scenario where we have a new supervisor, who has no clue, and a person in control who has no clue (where the tech is concerned, at least)... that would've been interesting, to say the least. Would've liked to have been a fly on the wall for that. ;)

There was a big law enforcement sting here... like... big time. Dropped up on some gang bangers and arrested twelve of them. And they dinged them with the good stuff... basically racketeering. Seven of the twelve are some of my past and/or current inmates. If convicted, most of them face somewhere in the range of 60 yrs to life in prison.

I would like to say that I'm surprised, but I'm not really. A lot of the kids I deal with... probably most of them, truthfully, are not good people and they're never going to be good people. It doesn't at all mean that I don't like some of them. They can be wickedly funny, very charming, philosophical... but that doesn't mean you turn your back to them.

And rehabilitation really doesn't work. I know people want you to think it does... but it doesn't. Not really. Not for kids, at least. And the reason for that is that kids have little to no control over their surroundings/life. So... say you get a kid and get him reasonably rehabilitated, where he is doing well and wants to do better... then you discharge him from the program and send him right back into the environment that created him. That doesn't fix anything. It disillusions.

That and it starts way too late. If you're trying to rehabilitate kids who are 15, 16, 17 yrs old? You're too late. By many years. You really need to catch them up by ten or eleven... maybe even a bit younger.

It's a jaded view, I know. It's one borne of nearly 25 yrs of dealing with at risk and/or delinquent kids. What we're doing? It doesn't work. It's not early enough and it's just not enough enough, honestly. I don't hold out much hope for the youth that I work with... at this point in my career, I just assume they're all lost to society... because most of them are. There is still a little glimmer... enough to treat them like such is not the case and to hope that someone proves me wrong some day... but... there's been so very little of that.

What's the answer, you ask? I have no idea. I wish I did. Even if I did know the answer, I probably couldn't get funding for it anyway, so...
 

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Just had the shortest lil dream that I was driving down the interstate toward home, as if I'd been to work. I kicked the cruise control up to 80 when the time was appropriate and then... what the fuck?!?!?!?! I can't see! Nothing! Blackness!

Freak the fuck out cuz rolling 80 mph down the interstate, particularly after you've just passed a couple of cars, blind as blind can be is a very bad thing.

I did the break mushing thing, whilst moving right (as I was already in the right lane, preparing to make my leave at the next exit) and stopped... and discovered my headlights weren't turned on. Which is odd, cuz they were on until I adjusted my speed. Dunno what that was about.

Dream was very short and whilst I was in the between of sleep and wakefullness. I know this because I'd just rolled over and realized it be time to get up off the couch soon...

Weirdness.

I think Autumn fucked overtime, yet again, last night. Bryce called in around 2340. Autumn and Joe were both in central control with me at the time cuz they were doing some of the computer work that needs to be done in there. Autumn took the call and when she was done she said that as soon as they were done with what they were doing, they needed to get to the list and start calling people.

Best as I can tell, that never happened. I never saw or heard either of them making phone calls. (I left intercoms open in strategic areas) I never got a phone call for voluntary overtime. I'm at the top of the list, as far as people already in the building (and 8th overall) so... I should've gotten a call. I didn't. Nobody else did, either.

Malachi left, Rita left and I left... leaving only Billy behind (we have that little split in start times, remember). I received no calls on my phone after I came home. So... I'm not sure what the hell happened.

It's possible that she she did call and a part timer (the 1st calls that are made) came in (though I didn't see any part timers come in this morning before I left), it's possible that Billy was forced to stay (but if he stayed, I should've still gotten a phone call, unless he agreed to stay all shift... but even then, that would be a violation of the union contract as people above him in seniority weren't offered the opportunity to take it.) or, I suppose it's possible that Autumn stayed. Though again... that would be a violation of the union contract, for the same reasons + supervisors are not allowed to cover staff vacancies (union contract)...

So. I have no idea.

It was a rather uneventful night, other than that. I read news stories online, wrote a little and read some more Watership Down. (I'm going to be so upset if all these fucking rabbits dies... just sayin'.) I expect tonight will be more of the same. I hope there are some new news stories. Most of the general news stuff is about Lord Dampnut and I just don't wanna... he just needs to go away so I don't have to look at him or hear him anymore.

I read a lot of crime stories. Some of that shit... man, people are some sick fuckers. I mean, I knew that, of course... but goddamn. I mean, when you're reading crime stories from around the world? Just... wow. Crazy, brutal shit.

I'll probably do some sports reading tonight. The Steelers are 10-0 this year... the only undefeated team in the NFL!
 

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So I asked Kelly about the ot stuff that Autumn did/did not do. Her answer was interesting.

She took the schedule, counted up and said they have/had the right number of people. Which... no... no, they didn't. They were supposed to have seven staff, when Bryce called in, they had six. That is not the right amount of people. Then she tells me that the supervisor counts in staffing totals... and that always has.

Uhm... nope. That's not true. Supervisors have never counted in staffing totals. Ever. Staffing numbers mean staff on the shift, not supervisors. It has never been any other way. Ever. Ever ever. Ever.

So. What this tells me is that they're doing the whole it's a rule, but only when it's convenient for us thing again. Cuz trust me... someone is going to get held over at some point when there are only six staff. Because that's what's supposed to happen.

Surprised? No. Not at all. This has been their standard operating procedure for years. And, when ever someone is telling you about how wrong you are (as Kelly did in this case) they always always always say... it's always been like this. Stand there and lie right to your face.

Tonight is the last night for me. Three days off. Yippee skippy. Looking forward to not working for an extra day. I didn't take many extra days off for the winter... my vacation time is racking up... and I still have all my pto hours as well. So, I don't know if I'll save it all for summer and take a bunch of days off again or what. Like... last year when I took most of the month of July off... or something? I dunno.

I have puppy fever really, really, really bad. 🐶

I want a puppy. My wee pup will be turning 3 yrs old on January 10 and my big pup will be turning 5 yrs old on February 3. It seems like a really long time since I've had a tiny little puppy. Do I need a puppy? No. But I sure do want one. I do think the wee pup would be excited to have someone to play with... the big pup is too lazy for things like playing. (He is the laziest dog, I swear... even as a puppy!) The wee pup is bounce off the walls high energy and I think a pup would be a great thing for him.

My mom would probably not be thrilled. But... she'd get over it.

But... we'll see. I wouldn't get a pup until the spring anyway. I wouldn't ever buy a pup at this time of year, because it's too cold. I prefer having a puppy in the spring and summer when we can be outside a lot and get wore out. It's easier potty training and all that in the warmer weather, too... then when it's cold again, your pups verging on being a year old and hopefully has a lot of that playful puppiness calmed a bit so that being in the house all winter isn't such a burden.

Time will tell, I suppose.

Silly people in the city are trying to recall a bunch of government peeps because of covid mandates. It's really pretty silly considering we don't even have a mask mandate (nor will we have one... it's one of those states) and the covid has gone off on a tear. 15% of the youth in our custody, as of today, are covid+ and nearly 20% of our staff have been hit so far. I have heard that it's raging in the other agency in our facility as well, but they're not allowed to talk about it, because I think they're trying to force their staff to come in whether they're sick or not. (Rumor has it... but unconfirmed, though nothing would surprise me since they tried to hide their first cases of covid+ back months ago)

We have some mandates like closing bars early and capacity limits and stuff like that. Oh... masks are supposed to be worn inside of establishments, but about half don't because My rights are being violated! and other dumb ass shit like that. These people make my brain hurt. I don't want to interact with them because I don't want the stupid jumping of them and onto me.


We here have been staying home since fucking March. And it sucks. But... I'm going to do as much as I can to mitigate risk. I can't not go to work... so that's a risk I have to deal with, regardless. But I can stay away from other places. I always wear a mask. (Trust me, it won't kill you.) It's made the days run together... I've found myself being late paying the bills a few times because I had no idea what day of the month it was... not even remotely. They just run together.

But... I'm not social anyway, so this is not that terrible for me. I'd like to be able to go to the bar and have my prime rib and Guinness... yes I would. But, really... that's all I'm missing.

And you know what I'm not going to be missing with these mandates that are currently in effect? Traffic. Do you know how nice it was when everything was shut down, but for essentials? There was no traffic. It was glorious. I could get where I was going without having to deal with fucktards that don't know how to drive... I loved it.

Then they call came back. Boo hiss. And now? They're going away again. I noticed last night, less traffic. It'll become even less when the new mandates go into effect. (Might've been today) Those close the bars even earlier.

I don't expect much of a change in behavior before it gets better. Stupid people are stubborn as fuck in their stupidity. But hopefully, since all these vaccines are starting to come together, maybe we'll have it a bit better under control by next summer. I'm hoping so... if for no other reason than to not have to hear people crying about wearing a mask.
 

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About 2 weeks ago, I came across a barn owl perched on a telephone wire in my backyard, scoping the area for food. I don't recall it being common to see an owl flying around, at least inmy neighborhood, let alone sitting there. I know they're around but they are stealth and good at staying undetected. This owl has been revisiting the past 2 weeks and I feel like it's my own resident owl. It's been a few days since I've last seen it, which I'm kind of bummed about. I've enjoyed coming home from work and seeing it there. One night it flew right over me and it was a peaceful moment. I still look for it every night in the hopes that I'll see it again.

I feel like the time change this year has messed with me. I can't seem to adjust to it, with it getting darker earlier. It's not like the time changing hasn't happened in the past, but I think, along with just how this whole year has been and me starting a new job, I'm having a harder time. The sun starts to set at 4:45pm here on the west coast. By the time I'm getting off at 6pm and heading home, I'm exhausted and it feels like 9pm. I've found that this is not unique to me but a lot of people are also struggling with this.
 

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About 2 weeks ago, I came across a barn owl perched on a telephone wire in my backyard, scoping the area for food. I don't recall it being common to see an owl flying around, at least inmy neighborhood, let alone sitting there. I know they're around but they are stealth and good at staying undetected. This owl has been revisiting the past 2 weeks and I feel like it's my own resident owl. It's been a few days since I've last seen it, which I'm kind of bummed about. I've enjoyed coming home from work and seeing it there. One night it flew right over me and it was a peaceful moment. I still look for it every night in the hopes that I'll see it again.

I feel like the time change this year has messed with me. I can't seem to adjust to it, with it getting darker earlier. It's not like the time changing hasn't happened in the past, but I think, along with just how this whole year has been and me starting a new job, I'm having a harder time. The sun starts to set at 4:45pm here on the west coast. By the time I'm getting off at 6pm and heading home, I'm exhausted and it feels like 9pm. I've found that this is not unique to me but a lot of people are also struggling with this.
Owl Symbolism & Meaning (+Totem, Spirit & Omens) | World Birds
 

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About 2 weeks ago, I came across a barn owl perched on a telephone wire in my backyard, scoping the area for food. I don't recall it being common to see an owl flying around, at least inmy neighborhood, let alone sitting there. I know they're around but they are stealth and good at staying undetected. This owl has been revisiting the past 2 weeks and I feel like it's my own resident owl. It's been a few days since I've last seen it, which I'm kind of bummed about. I've enjoyed coming home from work and seeing it there. One night it flew right over me and it was a peaceful moment. I still look for it every night in the hopes that I'll see it again.
How very cool. See a lot of hawks here, but rarely an owl.

I feel like the time change this year has messed with me. I can't seem to adjust to it, with it getting darker earlier. It's not like the time changing hasn't happened in the past, but I think, along with just how this whole year has been and me starting a new job, I'm having a harder time. The sun starts to set at 4:45pm here on the west coast. By the time I'm getting off at 6pm and heading home, I'm exhausted and it feels like 9pm. I've found that this is not unique to me but a lot of people are also struggling with this.
I feel much the same. It seems like this year, the time change has hit a little harder than in the past. As a 3rd shifter, I rarely see the sun now... it just makes me feel sleepy and as a result, I spend more time sleeping than during other times of the year. Sometimes, it seems like that's all I do. Ugh.

~~~

So. Happy Thanksgiving. Tad late, I suppose, but whatever.

It was an ok holiday here. Mom wasn't going to go, but changed her mind. She sat in the kitchen whilst everyone else was in the living room to eat. She came out later and sat in the hallway just off the kitchen/living room, so that she was quite a bit away from everyone. And she didn't stay long.

I can't say that I blame her, for many reasons. I'm just glad she came, even if she was mostly separate the entire time. At least she was there... she could've stayed home, but I don't think she really wanted to do that, honestly.

Good eats, football, conversation.

My niece (the sorta vegan) was harassing everyone at one point about what they were going to die from... and that most of us wouldn't reach the age of sixty (I guess she doesn't know how old I am? 🤨) and blah, blah, blah, blah... she was really going to town, all (mostly playfully) high and mighty...

And then I told her we'd all be smokin', drinkin' and eatin' dead animals over her grave when her heart explodes.

Cuz, you know... she has a heart condition. Everyone bust out laughing (even she did), but damn if that didn't shut her up. I asked her, after a while, why she was so quiet... and she said because there's not much to come back with...

It was a playful slap, but a hard one. You can spend all your days being a prime specimen of human meat 'n bones and still die young. Cancer doesn't give a fuck. Drunk drivers don't give a fuck. And sometimes, shit just happens. I think it's a good thing to keep that in mind. No guarantees lying around in this life.

My old dentist was a prime example of that. I started going to him when I was like 9 or 10 yrs old. At that point in time, he was a young, strapping, athletic guy. He played tennis, basketbal, softball, he ran, he biked... he was in great shape. Muscular with out being muscle bound, lean... just... a dude who was physically on point.


After I graduated, when computers were starting to become a bigger thing, he quit being a dentist, moved out of state and started doing computer related stuff. One day he was out biking with his son and... dropped over dead of a massive heart attack. I think he was 41 or 42 yrs old. Dead just like that. (His poor kid... man, that would suck.)

I've spent the rest of my holiday gaming, mostly. Steam had a lovely fall sale, so I went off and bought seven games, cuz why not? Raft, Subnautica, Medieval Dynasty, End Zone, Phasmophobia, Satisfactory and Red Dead 2.

I've already played RDR2 on ps4, but decided to get it on pc so I can play it outside or where ever, if I'm out of town or something like that. Play a little different next time around. I wasn't always nice in the first play through!

The only game I've tried so far is End Zone A World Apart, which is a post apocalyptic city builder... we all know how I love the city builders. ;) The game is early access... but promising. There are frustrating elements, I have to say. It's been quite tough to get started... the first three or four cities I started collapsed rather quickly. Quite annoying, especially to someone who plays a lot of city builders and is reasonably decent at it.

I do like it, even if it frustrates me a bit. Hopefully, balance and other frustrating bits will get worked out along the way.


I've watched game play of most everything else except Satisfactory... which I got because it looked interesting. Like Factorio, it's basically factory building, but there's some other elements tossed in as well, which made it intriguing. Eventually, I'll give a try to that. I've still got games in my queue from this spring that I've not played yet.


I'm trying to find a ps5 too. I think I shall wait until after Xmas... I think there will be a bit more around by that time that's all said and done. So... I guess I'm not trying that hard, but I was a earlier. I knew they'd be all gone, but thought I'd look about anyway. Nada. So... probably be nada for a bit longer on that sphere.

I have to go back to work tonight... and work with lovely Autumn. The longer I'm around her, the more I want to snap on her. She drives me a tad bit mad, honestly. And Joe, I think, will be on as well. So... the blind leading the blind, basically. But... it's not my circus, as they say, soooooo...

I wish I could game at work. I might actually almost like my job if such were the case.

The local forums are interesting right now. Because Lord Dampnut, despite what he says, has lost the election. A good many people on the local forums have lost their goddamn minds because of this. Well... this is assuming, of course, that they had much mind to lose in the first place, which judging by some of the posts... yeaaaaaah...

There is one fundy lady that... well, she's interesting to read. She has no concept of even basic grammar or spelling, which sometimes makes reading what she writes confusing as fuck. But basically, it all boils down to God wanted Lord Dampnut to be President, to solve the world's ills, because he was the only man in the world who could do it. And now God wants Biden to be President to push along the 2nd coming... which is, apparently, arriving on your door step next fall.

So, she says, next fall when all the Christians are gone... boy will the democrates (her spelling) be sorry then! Just you watch, it's going to happen! She's pretty adamant about that.

What a strange little planet inside their wee little noggin's these whackadoos must live in. I'd be curious to just... have someone study them and see what's going on inside these wee little brains. Their reality is so far from real life and so fucking bizarre... I don't get it. Makes not one bit of sense to me. Very strange.

There was a study out earlier this year that suggested conservatives are more fearful (and thus motivated by fear) than liberals.

Fear and Anxiety Drive Conservatives' Political Attitudes

Anecdotally I would have to say, for the most part, that has been my experience. I mean, I didn't even really think about it (much) until I read an article about the study, but... yeah.

Over the course of the past few years, my conservative homies have been going on about one thing or another in an almost panicky sort of way. A few years ago, it was the Muslims and Arabs and the middle east. They were coming to get us! They went on and on and on and on about these large scale attacks Middle Eastern terror groups were going to do... bigger than 9/11, blah, blah, blah.

And when I told them that I found Mr. Putin and his ilk far more of a threat than a few thousand Middle Eastern terrorists, they about lost their shit. Just watch... just watch... that's what they told me. Still waiting, as a matter of fact, but you know... big threat, big threat!

More recently it was the caravans of South Americans thugs and murderers that were going to cross the border and wreak all kinds of havoc... of their own accord and because there were Middle Eastern terrorists in the midst, so... you just watch what happens!

It seems that someone's always coming to take something away from them. Nobody ever does, but they always think someone's on their way to take... something. Their rights, their guns, their jobs, their daughters, whatever.

As a person who fears very little, I find the whole concept of being that fearful of things that aren't likely (or even probable in some cases) to happen and being so very worked up about it. I don't get it. There are things to be fearful of (tornados and vampires, for example) but being afraid of pretty much everything? What a horrible way to live.

In other news...

Got my hairs cut. All of them. So much better. That shit was out of control and driving me mad. Hanging here, flopping there. Ugh. I was doing more head toss/hair flippin' than a teenage Bieber and I'm of an age where flopping your head around like that can cause serious injury. Just so you know.

So now I'm shorn and shaved and sorta like a human again. Go me.

I suppose I should go find something else to do. Finish the laundry. Game a little. Should've taken a nap, but it's a little late for that now. I didn't sleep much after about 1p today. So... I'll be tired in the morning, fo' sho'.

These lads do it pretty well, me thinks.

 

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How very cool. See a lot of hawks here, but rarely an owl.



I feel much the same. It seems like this year, the time change has hit a little harder than in the past. As a 3rd shifter, I rarely see the sun now... it just makes me feel sleepy and as a result, I spend more time sleeping than during other times of the year. Sometimes, it seems like that's all I do. Ugh.
Yeah I feel like it's throwing us off even more than we already have been. It has to be the combination of everything that is making us feel this way.

The local forums are interesting right now. Because Lord Dampnut, despite what he says, has lost the election. A good many people on the local forums have lost their goddamn minds because of this. Well... this is assuming, of course, that they had much mind to lose in the first place, which judging by some of the posts... yeaaaaaah...

There is one fundy lady that... well, she's interesting to read. She has no concept of even basic grammar or spelling, which sometimes makes reading what she writes confusing as fuck. But basically, it all boils down to God wanted Lord Dampnut to be President, to solve the world's ills, because he was the only man in the world who could do it. And now God wants Biden to be President to push along the 2nd coming... which is, apparently, arriving on your door step next fall.

So, she says, next fall when all the Christians are gone... boy will the democrates (her spelling) be sorry then! Just you watch, it's going to happen! She's pretty adamant about that.

What a strange little planet inside their wee little noggin's these whackadoos must live in. I'd be curious to just... have someone study them and see what's going on inside these wee little brains. Their reality is so far from real life and so fucking bizarre... I don't get it. Makes not one bit of sense to me. Very strange.

There was a study out earlier this year that suggested conservatives are more fearful (and thus motivated by fear) than liberals.

Fear and Anxiety Drive Conservatives' Political Attitudes

Anecdotally I would have to say, for the most part, that has been my experience. I mean, I didn't even really think about it (much) until I read an article about the study, but... yeah.

Over the course of the past few years, my conservative homies have been going on about one thing or another in an almost panicky sort of way. A few years ago, it was the Muslims and Arabs and the middle east. They were coming to get us! They went on and on and on and on about these large scale attacks Middle Eastern terror groups were going to do... bigger than 9/11, blah, blah, blah.

And when I told them that I found Mr. Putin and his ilk far more of a threat than a few thousand Middle Eastern terrorists, they about lost their shit. Just watch... just watch... that's what they told me. Still waiting, as a matter of fact, but you know... big threat, big threat!

More recently it was the caravans of South Americans thugs and murderers that were going to cross the border and wreak all kinds of havoc... of their own accord and because there were Middle Eastern terrorists in the midst, so... you just watch what happens!

It seems that someone's always coming to take something away from them. Nobody ever does, but they always think someone's on their way to take... something. Their rights, their guns, their jobs, their daughters, whatever.

As a person who fears very little, I find the whole concept of being that fearful of things that aren't likely (or even probable in some cases) to happen and being so very worked up about it. I don't get it. There are things to be fearful of (tornados and vampires, for example) but being afraid of pretty much everything? What a horrible way to live.

It's amazing how 'out there' they've become during these 4 years under Trump the Hump and this election. I mean, it's just madness. I feel like this divide is ruining relationships and tainting our country even more. I am a liberal and I am all for bipartisanship, but I have to draw the line somewhere and that is when they go so far as to spew hate and racism. I am so done with all of it. I am usually one that is always trying to get along with everyone and not wanting anything to do with confrontation, but once that behavior starts unfolding in front of me, I'm at the point were I shut them down. But it's also exhausting. I have a friend who is so radically conservative that has jumped on the Trumpism boat and is throwing around all sorts of ballot fraud conspiracy theories and is now on that Parler site. They don't realize that Trump has been planting seeds for them, by building up (for several months) the false claim that the democrats will cheat in the election before voting even started (probably because he was worried about losing the election). That or they choose to be blind to it/ignore it.

It's funny because I remember her making fun of him during the 2016 primaries. She specifically showed me a meme, because she knew that was something we could both agree on during that election. And now, here we are.

I've spent the rest of my holiday gaming, mostly. Steam had a lovely fall sale, so I went off and bought seven games, cuz why not? Raft, Subnautica, Medieval Dynasty, End Zone, Phasmophobia, Satisfactory and Red Dead 2.

I've already played RDR2 on ps4, but decided to get it on pc so I can play it outside or where ever, if I'm out of town or something like that. Play a little different next time around. I wasn't always nice in the first play through!

The only game I've tried so far is End Zone A World Apart, which is a post apocalyptic city builder... we all know how I love the city builders. ;) The game is early access... but promising. There are frustrating elements, I have to say. It's been quite tough to get started... the first three or four cities I started collapsed rather quickly. Quite annoying, especially to someone who plays a lot of city builders and is reasonably decent at it.

I do like it, even if it frustrates me a bit. Hopefully, balance and other frustrating bits will get worked out along the way.


I've watched game play of most everything else except Satisfactory... which I got because it looked interesting. Like Factorio, it's basically factory building, but there's some other elements tossed in as well, which made it intriguing. Eventually, I'll give a try to that. I've still got games in my queue from this spring that I've not played yet.


I'm trying to find a ps5 too. I think I shall wait until after Xmas... I think there will be a bit more around by that time that's all said and done. So... I guess I'm not trying that hard, but I was a earlier. I knew they'd be all gone, but thought I'd look about anyway. Nada. So... probably be nada for a bit longer on that sphere.
I didn't realize the PS5 was out already. I'll have to keep an eye out for that, as well. That was me trying to find the Nintendo Switch for several months. They all sold out during the pandemic and were extremely difficult to find. I finally got my hands on one in October. Since I dropped money on that, I'll probably have to wait awhile for the PS5, anyway.
 

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Yeah I feel like it's throwing us off even more than we already have been. It has to be the combination of everything that is making us feel this way.
Perhaps. I do go through this every year, but this year it's just been a struggle to stay awake. Even on my days off, I get up at a fair time, say 0900 or something, and I'm so tired by early evening, I can barely make it to 10-11p... and I'm a night owl! It's not right, damn it!

It's amazing how 'out there' they've become during these 4 years under Trump the Hump and this election. I mean, it's just madness. I feel like this divide is ruining relationships and tainting our country even more. I am a liberal and I am all for bipartisanship, but I have to draw the line somewhere and that is when they go so far as to spew hate and racism. I am so done with all of it. I am usually one that is always trying to get along with everyone and not wanting anything to do with confrontation, but once that behavior starts unfolding in front of me, I'm at the point were I shut them down. But it's also exhausting. I have a friend who is so radically conservative that has jumped on the Trumpism boat and is throwing around all sorts of ballot fraud conspiracy theories and is now on that Parler site. They don't realize that Trump has been planting seeds for them, by building up (for several months) the false claim that the democrats will cheat in the election before voting even started (probably because he was worried about losing the election). That or they choose to be blind to it/ignore it.

It's funny because I remember her making fun of him during the 2016 primaries. She specifically showed me a meme, because she knew that was something we could both agree on during that election. And now, here we are.
It truly is. Even if you take away all the conspiracy theories and the other stupid that seems to permeate that crowd, even if you take all that away, you still have this behavior where they act as though he's (at the very least) a rock star or (at the very most) some sort of god.

Walking about all year 'round sporting his name on everything. Going all gaga like teenage girls a Beatles concert whenever he's around or just when they're thinking about him, even. It is the most bizarre shit I've seen actual fucking grown ups do for a long goddamn time. I can't image ever acting that way for any politician, ever. It's weird as hell and it's very cultish.

The fact that they can't seem to figure out that he couldn't give two shits about any of them doesn't even seem to enter their wee little brains is also quite weird. Are they really that stupid or are they just so swept up in this... whatever the fuck it is, that they're blinded to everything else? Whatever the reason for it, that behavior is how we end up with people in power doing very bad things and causing others to follow along without engaging a single one of their brain cells.

As a person who's over the age of 55, it's just... weird... seeing people act this way, especially people who are my age or older, because when I was young you kept your politics to yourself. It was rude (and not well received, either) if you asked someone who they planned to vote/had voted for... like, people would get seriously annoyed by that. It was talked about in the household, but not outside of it.

I think I'd like for it to go back to that, but I'm afraid that now that cat is out of bag, it's going to be mighty difficult to put it back in again. And I agree that it's all fatiguing. All of it. Fatiguing and annoying.

I didn't realize the PS5 was out already. I'll have to keep an eye out for that, as well. That was me trying to find the Nintendo Switch for several months. They all sold out during the pandemic and were extremely difficult to find. I finally got my hands on one in October. Since I dropped money on that, I'll probably have to wait awhile for the PS5, anyway.
November 12th was the release date, but I think everything was sold out prior to that. I couldn't find anywhere to pre order, so I guess I got on the boat a little bit late. It's going to be my Christmas gift to my own self, just won't be here for Xmas is all. But that's ok... I'm old, I've got patience. 🤘
 
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