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This morning's grand prize mandatory overtime winner was... Malachi!

I think that leaves me next up on the slaughter block. So... high probability that I will work mandatory overtime tomorrow... likely an entire 8 hr shift. And I won't be in central control because Lana is in there for modified duty and has been for eons now. (When I get held over on Sundays, which has been my hold over day of late, I work control because it's Lana's day off.)

So. Yeah. Yay.

Doug was bitching and going off again last night. He's all into this we, we, we 3rd shift thing. As if. He's been a firsty for... well, as long as I've been there so at least 23.5 yrs and he's been on 3rd shift for 3 months... and now, suddenly, he's one of us? I don't think so, Scooter. He's just upset because the bullshit is effecting him for a change.

He was ranting and raving and how we need to go and do something! We need to go tell them!

Uh... yeah. That's a solid pass, thanks. I was a right fighter in the agency once. Me, Malachi, Brent, Kate... and you know what that got us? Well... first of all, everything we railed for (or against, as the case may be)... well, nothing changed. All of our attempting to make things better failed. And, in the process, we were labeled and targeted. I mean... that's the reason the Ding Dong Bitch tried to get me fired like... 5 or 6 times or whatever. (I've kinda lost track of how many times. It's quite a lot, though.)

The other thing was... there was never a WE when we fought. Sometimes we fought for the general good (such as trying to get it through admins' heads that letting the inmates have clothing irons... you know, anvils on long cords, because it was a safety and security risk particularly because people never secured them when the inmates were done with them... just left them lying about so someone could get bashed in the fucking head.) and sometimes we fought for a specific person.

Someone would come to us and say, hey this and this and this is happening to me, can you help me? If I can get someone to stand with me, I think I'll have a better chance. So... we'd agree... and go marching off to the lion's den, only to find out that the person who wanted someone to stand with them, had slinked off to hide... having us to fight their battle by ourselves.

Brent saw the writing on the wall many years ago and left. They finally managed to get Kate fired after years of trying to do so. I've suffered the same fate with a better (?) outcome and then there's Malachi... with whom they fuck with in far more subtle ways. (Ding Dong Bitch was very afraid of him...)

So... yeah. Doug can go off and tilt at the windmills if he likes, but I stopped doing that many, many years ago. I never got anything for my efforts, nothing ever changed and I ended up with a big fat target on me. So... yeah. You wanna fight the good fight? You go out there and get after it. I'm done with all that business.

Well... just saw a voicemail from work... they're calling for overtime for tomorrow morning. Shocker.

What's annoying is that they're just now doing this. I've known since at least Saturday that every day this week needs (or appears to need) 1st shift coverage. And... Rita said it was known back last Thursday when they took Billy off the schedule for this week. So... did they start calling last Thursday to try to find coverage for any day of this week? Nope. They wait until about 730p the night before to start calling to find coverage. You know... when nobody's going to respond to their inquiries because it's such short fucking notice? Yeah.

So... I guess I'll be working 1st shift this morning. Yay me.

It's not a 100% thing, of course. More like 99.9%... there is hope, but it is the slimmest of slims. To the point of not really existing. My best chance is hoping some second shifter will want to take half the hours so they can move their name to the bottom of the mandatory list. That's not very likely though.... so... we'll see.

Rage quitting is seeming like a better and better idea every day.
 

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So... the winners of the mandatory overtime prize this morning was... me and Doug. Cuz why the fuck not?

They had us both be secondaries... which is ok. But... it's a lot of walking about and standing about and I discovered today that I need new boots. My feet are still fucking killing me. And I have 8 hrs (at least) of walking about tonight, after having had not much rest (for me or my feets). So. Yay for that.

It was no terrible. I mean, my dogs was barking, but otherwise? Eh. Boring more than anything. As a secondary, I just did rounds on any kids left behind (not attending breakfast, class, etc), did random gofer things and then gave breaks to both staff on my unit and central control. (Doug did breaks on his unit and... I have no idea what else. He did breakfast, but I didn't see him really for the rest of the morning.)

The worst was just having to be anywhere near the female pod whilst they were awake. Good god. I'd fucking strangle them about 10 minutes in. No fucking way I'd ever let them put me on that unit during a waking shift. Jesus Christ. Moody, bitchy, mouthy, catty, whispery... ugh. No. Just fucking no. Spending 15 minutes with them whilst I was giving Jill a break was plenty.

It was much easier dealing with the boys on my unit. I gave Anne two breaks. One regular one and then a bit later a bathroom/water break. (Because she apparently didn't do any of that on her break... since it was like 20-25 mins earlier) But that's how I spent the rest of the day. I let a kid out of the classroom to use the bathroom and he decided to stand outside the classroom after he was done and talk to me, rather than return to class.

I don't blame him, that shit's boring as fuck.

Anne came back and didn't ask him to return to the classroom, so we just continued talking. When control called me and said that Isaiah had come in (we made a deal about splitting the shift last night) and I told the boy that it was time for me to go home, he said it was nice talking to you, I appreciate you, man. It's not much, but those words are nice as we don't often receive them from anybody especially not the kids.

Grabbed some MickyD's on the way home, got here and let the pups out then tried to crash on the couch. That didn't work because the dogs wouldn't leave me alone and I couldn't really get comfortable. The pups wanted to lie right up next to me and I was hot as fuck... the ac at work barely works... yeah. I wanted to be cool. I just couldn't get comfortable on the couch, I was hot and tired and my shit hurt. So... to bed we went. And we were out pretty fast. (Lately I've been sleeping better on the couch and have been restless in bed... for some reason.)

I checked the schedule last night to make sure what Doug said about Billy being removed (name and all) from the schedule... forever... and sure 'nuff. He's whited out. On my last break during my regular shift, I texted my nephew to see how Billy did with them... and he replied that he didn't make it with them. (I suppose being under investigation at the time you're looking for a new job is probably bad, eh?) So... there ya go.

I heard there was supposed to be an email from Billy about what was going on... but... nothing so far. From work or from Billy. I'm sure Billy's in a corner somewhere licking his wounds, especially after getting turned down from my nephew's agency because... I know that was like a last resort thing and he didn't get hired.

The upside, of course, is that I'll never have to see him again for as long as I live and I'm perfectly ok with that. I mean... I was kinda hoping he got the job at my nephew's agency, but... I'm still glad he's gone from ours. I don't wish him any ill... just wish him away from me and here we are.

Of course... I never wrote about this before, but just before this last shift bid, when Doug came to the shift (and therefore bumped Billy off of 3rd shift) Billy brought in a whole slew of papers... a whole binder full of shit... to try to convince Malachi to retire. Showed what he could get here and what he could get there. Being very helpful, you know.

Of course, it wasn't benevolent or any in way to benefit Malachi. He just wanted Mal to retire so he wouldn't get bumped off 3rd shift. Mal said he kept this up for a week. Bringing him this, that and the other thing about how retirement would really benefit Malachi.

Because Billy's plan was to ride out his last years with our agency (he's a couple years older than me) hanging out on 3rd shift. And he thought he had it made in the shade... and then Doug came along and threw a big fucking monkey wrench into Billy's plans. So... let's get rid of Malachi! 😁

Saw the new guy they hired today. (We need more than one and this one won't stay for long. I'll give it 6 months max) I don't know what his first name is and I think his last name is Greek. Or it certainly seems like it could be at least. He also looks like he could be Greek... or maybe Latin of some variety. I dunno. He's dark. If I get the chance to talk to him, I'll ask him. (Names interest me, what can I say? I like being able to identify the heritage of a name. It's a weird thing I know, but something that's interested me since I was a kid.)

Anyway. My wonderful alarm has gone off which means I have to go out and drag my carcass back to work. :(
 

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Well. Nobody from 3rd shift was held over this morning. 😮 I know.

But, it does seems as though The Great Implosion is beginning. I expect things to get much before they get better. In fact in may get so bad, so quickly, that the agency never recovers. As in the agency ends up dissolved. I've had the feeling for the past three or four years that due to the way the facility was being ran and due to changes in juvenile justice due to national and local legislation, that the agency had about 10 yrs before it would morph into something completely different or be done away with completely.

We may have started down that path of no return.

So... obviously, we've been understaffed and quite badly so, for the past... about 5 yrs or so. Skelly
💀staffing, bare bones shit that is dangerous to us and our youthful offenders. We've had some recent departures (a couple of years ago, 11 people quit in a year, which is a crazy amount for a small agency like ours)... Cinder left, Anaya left... two supervisors (Montrelle and Audrey) were fired for being drunk at work, Tyra quit just before that...

Now Billy's fired... and last night I found out that both Gabrielle (2nd) and Autumn (supervisor) have put in their two weeks notice. We also lost one of the very few part timers we have left, Wilonda, who quit because she applied for full time and didn't get hired. (I've heard that she's slow... both mentally & physically. She was kept as a secondary only because we need the bodies. Essentially, she was not full time staff material and likely shouldn't have even have been a part timer.)

Wilonda is immediate. She was working a shit load of first shifts... so now we're even more short on 1st. Gabrielle put in her two weeks notice but has been to work since, so consider that an immediate purge as well, I guess. Autumn put in the two weeks notice as well and since she's a supervisor, she'll be around for those two weeks.

I am not surprised by either Autumn or Gabrielle quitting. Gabrielle told me when she first started that this was a way to pay bills as she finished up her master's degree... soon as she was done with that, she was out. She's done with that and now she's out. Gabrielle's a great loss only in that she's a warm body. She's not a particularly good staff. Mostly because she plays too much... she's one of those who is waaaaaay to chummy with the male inmates. Acting with them as though they are peers... which is never ever ever a good thing. Ever.

Autumn as I'm sure you recall is a good loss as she does not belong in this job. I think she's a nice person and I don't dislike her, but I also don't want to work with her ever. She still has no idea what she's doing, can't retain information, does stupid shit because she's not safety/security minded, etc. She's a nice person, but corrections is not the environment for her. Group home or something like that... or a therapeutic setting or a school setting... that's more Autumn's speed.

This seems to be the beginning of the end, as it were, because... they're not going to be able to hire people fast enough and get them on the units fast enough to prevent massive amounts of overtime. Massive amounts of overtime, forced mandatory overtime, is going to cause people to become even more angry and convince people who are sitting on the fence into actually quitting. I talked to several people from 2nd shift last night and several are now past the pondering and have moved into the serious side of moving on.

We can't take many losses... we can't really take the ones we just now have. (Except for Autumn... she's a supervisor and doesn't count as staffing, for one thing, and she was pretty useless anyway, sooooooo...)

I have a job to apply for on my days off. I probably won't get it, but... it's the only one that I saw that is remotely favorable. It's a campus supervisor for the city school system. Basically, you just walk about and make sure all is ok at your specific school. (This would be for the 2nd of the wealthiest high schools in the city) I would need to supplement the job (mostly likely) during the summer as the job is only during the school year (all holidays, school breaks and summer off) and it doesn't pay spectacular, but it would be an easy job with great benefits and if I stayed with the school district long enough, I could earn a proper pension as well. And at my age (because it's age + years of service) it wouldn't take me very long to get there. And I wouldn't have to stay in that job forever... once you're into the system, a whole plethora of other jobs opens up to you. (It's nigh on impossible to get some of those jobs unless you already work for the district or you have a parent that does.)

Doug said he applied for every janitor's position with the city's school district. He doesn't even care... he just needs something so he can get out. I don't really expect him to retire at the end of this shift rotation unless he gets one of these jobs, though. He keeps saying it, but he lies so fucking much, you have to see it to actually know it's truth.

Crazy days. I've a three day weekend this week, which I am in desperate need of... and I'm off to get those hours in so I can get into that extended weekend. Cheers.
 

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I don't know what idiot started telling the bereaved that holding on causes their lost loved ones not to rest. Jesus fucking christ people are stupid. I'll never let go of the pain for losing my son. I will live life, but I'm not letting go. Fuck all that noise. And fuck all the people that tell people that dumb ass shit.
 

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I was bouncing around a forum... or some internet place, I don't recall. But there was a thread about the worst (or most hurtful or whatever) thing your parents ever said to you.

I didn't read it, I just saw it. It made me think, though... and I can't really say my parents ever said anything to me, ever, that was that type of hurtful. I mean... parents say and do shit, cuz they're human beings, but... my parents never said anything downright cruel or mean spirited or whatever. And I can't imagine them doing so.

What it did immediately bring to mind was a time I heard my friend's mom say something to his younger brother. My friend was killed in a car accident when he was 16... his brother was 13. His mom and brother were at my house after my friend died to... pick something up or drop something or whatever (Our dads worked together), I don't really recall why they were there, but they were in our living room.

Anyway, my mom and my friend's mom were talking and me and little brother were just kinda sitting around looking at each other. And somehow the conversation got to cars... maybe my dad was going to work on one of theirs or something, who knows... this was 1981, so details are a bit faded.

Anyway... out of the blue, the little brother said You could get me a car like you did you know who (referring to my friend, his dead older brother, of course)... and my friend's mom replied We'll think about getting you a car when you start acting like you know who.

The kid... he just deflated. He didn't say another word. And I have always remembered that because I thought it was one of the cruelest things I've ever heard someone say to another person... and I just remember how this poor kid just sank in on himself.

How lovely to go through your teen years being compared to your dead older brother?

Mom was not a cruel person. I know she was hurting... she just lost a kid, the oldest son, only 16 yrs old. And... there was a definite difference between my friend and his younger brother. My friend was not an angel, but his little brother was a little shit. (I did not like him at all when we were kids, but he turned out just fine and we're still cool all these years later.) But you know what? This 13 yr old kid lost his brother, too...

But what a horrible thing to say. It was barbed and it was brutal. And I remember the words. I will always remember the words and that kid deflating. Like... he just knew he would never fill his older brother's shoes. Well... you know, all the stuff that would run through your head if your mom said that to you.

~~~
That was last night. I got distracted and didn't finish. 🤷‍♂️

I ended up texting three different people at the same time, whilst I was trying to write this. Obviously, the texting won out and this just sat. I didn't realize I hadn't finished until later on and by then I was ready to have a lie about on the couch and look at some tv for a while.

Not a long while because I promptly fell asleep... well, not too promptly. I watched some amateur backyard style fights (boxing, kickboxing, mma) on a YouTube channel called Streetbeefs. I do that when I don't want to think about anything... just judge people on their fighting ability. Which... some of these dudes have some and a lot of them do not. Some of them are pure untrained potential and others are just... well, delusional I guess. They think they can fight... but they really, really can't.

One kid I watched last night... I wouldn't say he was brimming with potential, but with a good trainer and a few years of work, he could be a decent mma fighter. But... right now? Dude was closing his eyes when he was coming in to throw punches. 😁 I was like... bruh... open your eyes!

At some point I switched to some other channel... I have no idea what and the next thing I know I wake up to Christopher Hitchens chattering on during a debate. I believe with Dinesh D'Souza? I dunno. I think so, but didn't stay around for it. Let the pups out and then went to bed.

This morning whilst munching on my breakfast of leftover pizza and wings, I was reading in one of the local forums (this one is for an area about an hour away) and there was a big todo about this one family going "waste free". And there was a strong contingency on the forum saying how disrespectful it was to their neighbors... driving down property values and that sorta thing. I mean... these peeps were fired the fuck up.

So what was causing all this grief? Well... the family in question planted a garden and hung their laundry on drying lines. There were especially incensed because they put small garden boxes (for lack of a better term from me) in the front yard. Oh... they had three chickens in the backyard, too.

That was how they were being disrespectful of their neighbors.

It's very strange to me because growing up... everyone I knew, pretty much, had a drying line and a garden. The whole entire north lawn at our house (before it later become additional driveway space) was a garden. Part of that was in the front (right up to the sidewalk but behind a chainlink fence) and went the entire length of the lot on the side. The drying line was in the backyard.

We didn't have chickens (nobody did) but one of the neighbors down the way had ducks. (pets, not food.)

Nobody lost their goddamn mind about a garden or a drying line... or a few chickens.

Just a few years ago our neighbors across the street had a bunch of chickens. They city said they didn't care as long as they asked the all of us neighbors if we cared... and none of us did. I couldn't give a shit less if they had chickens in their yard. Why would I? What's that got to do with me? (No rooster, of course, for obvious reasons.)

People are strange. And these people who are offended are like... crazy fucking offended. Saying things like just because it's legal doesn't mean it's appropriate and that there's a time and place for everything and this is not the place for such things and blah, blah, blah.

There is, of course, a contingency of people who think those people should mind their fucking business... and that group is larger, but... as we've learned over the past 4.5 yrs, a noisy minority can cause a lot of fucking problems for the rest of us with their screechy nonsense.

Alrighty... time for me to get these puppy dogs outside for the day. It's already 10a! Yikes!
 

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Well...

My prediction about coming back from my 3 day weekend and having to do overtime straight away came true. Shocker, I know. :rolleyes: I swear to the stars they're trying to fucking kill us. I mean, seriously already.

I actually took my time voluntarily. Because it was the better of the two options. I volunteered to work from 1030-230p because it was four hours. Had I declined to take it under voluntary overtime, they would've asked the next person on the list, which was Malachi. And Malachi would've taken it because it was four hours... because there was another opening, from 0630-230p. So... if I'd have declined that four hour shift on voluntary overtime, then Malachi would've taken it and then I would've been stuck working eights hours under mandatory overtime.

Yay. So. Yeah. Malachi was stuck with 8 hrs and I went home at 0600 and came back at 1030.

And I know you think... well, at least you had a chance to take a nap. No. No I didn't. Because 1) I'm not a napper. I just can't nap. Not my thing. (When I "nap"... it's like 6 hrs...) 2) I was mad as fuck. I mean... boiling steaming fucking raging mad. I was pissed off when I got there (working the holiday) and then this happens, too.

Also... let's add some more rage, shall we?

Whilst I was talking to Joe (supervisor) about the overtime (about who's next on the mandatory overtime list) he tells me Well, Natalie has a doctor's note, she can't work mandatory overtime, just voluntary overtime.

That selfish, lazy, worthless fucking bitch. You don't want to work overtime like everyone else, so you pitch everyone else under the fucking bus so you can be a lazy worthless piece of shit. That's fucking dirty, man. Really fucking dirty. That bitch... I will never ever ever ever do any manner of favor for her again, ever.

I mean... how fucking low. Fucking selfish cunt.

So. Probably, it was actually her turn to do some overtime, but yeah... she's got a fucking note. And just for mandatory overtime... it's ok if she volunteers... she just can't do mandatory. Uh huh. I don't know what crack pot doc gave her that fake ass shit... but he can eat a bag of dicks right along with her.

So... this afternoon, Lacey (one of my 2nd shift homies) came in and was like... what the fuck are you doing here? Told her, though she obviously knew... and then told her Malachi had been stuck as well... and she was pissed off. Then I said something to her about Natalie and her fucking doc's note and she said that admin can't approve that. That I should contact our acting union prez (Lana) and let her know. So I did that just a minute ago.

Apparently, you can get a doc's note, but it has to have a specific time limit and then she can't work the units, either. Which, honestly... that's going to suck if she has her doc change it. I mean... she could make the time limit 6 months and then she'd not only not have to do mandatory overtime for 6 months, but also could be in control for six months straight... which doesn't even remotely sound better than the current situation.

On the other hand, fuck her and her nonsense. Fucking worthless piece of shit.

So... I got home this afternoon at 3p... had chow and then basically went to bed. I was probably in bed by 330 or so... then another 30-40 minutes to wind down (wasn't looking at the clock, but it was a while... it always is) and then up at 8p to get ready to go back work.

So... up for 24-ish hours (tried to enjoy a little bit of the holiday), sleep for... 3.5-4 hrs and then head back to work. So I can maybe do some more mandatory overtime in the morning... it's going to happen more often to those of us who don't have a fucking doc's note to avoid it. Yay.

I more pissed, honestly about Natalie's bullshit. That's like... it's like finding out one of your comrades at war is a traitor. Finding out a member of your gang is a snitch. It's that kind of a betrayal. That... person who rats out your whole squad to the Nazis because they're a sniveling little bitch.

I can forgive people of a lot of things, but this? Nope. She's fucking crossed a line.

 

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So I am officially Somewhat Freaked Out

It's not over anything bad (I think,) just... not what I'm used to, and it's all happened sort of quickly.

I decided not to let an uncommunicative INTJ (who I've been in this weird, vague booty-call arrangement with) dictate whether I'd enjoy my long weekend or not, so after not hearing from him, I decided I was going to go to this bar downtown someone had recommended. Seemed like my kind of place, so I talked myself into trying it.

I get there and notice that a guy who's talking to the bartender keeps on looking at me, but I can tell that he'd be too introverted to start anything, and I'm getting strong "this would be an interesting person to talk with" vibes. I eventually overhear them talking about drug science, which happens to be one of my favorite topics, so I use that as my excuse to sit next to him and get to chatting.

We proceeded to talk for the next 5 hours. We were there until 1:30am; completely lost track of time.

He's an INTP, (Typology literate; bonus!) former Navy, works on ship engines, has a Caribbean family background, and also happens to be pretty fucking fine, if I do say so myself. We talked about a million different things, ranging from Death Metal to what it's like to be in the "Oppressed Oppressor" position (him being a black man, me being a white woman -- just Google it; it's interesting)

Once we decide to head out at around 1:30, there was the moment, the "are we going to continue this elsewhere?" moment. That's when the INTJ decides to text me. 🙄

He wants me to come over, and I know exactly why. I decide to opt for the guy who didn't wait until the goddamn witching hour on Monday to text me when he had said that we would meet up over the weekend (very typical of him, for the record; most unreliable planner I've come across) You snooze you lose, buckaroo.

The INTP is vacationing from out of town and rented this sort of mini house cabin thing out in the more rural part of the mountains. I go up there with him and... you can probably guess the rest. And good lord, it was amazing. He was, umm... tireless. Let's just put it that way.

He tells me it's the first time he's had "good sex" in a while because he always felt as if he wasn't making a strong enough connection with other people. "I guess I never realized that a 5-hour conversation is such effective foreplay." 😆

So, why am I freaked out?

One of the reasons for his trip was that he was scouting out the city I live in to possibly move. He's in Virginia, now, and wants to live somewhere more progressive (Asheville is about as progressive as the South gets) I get a text from him today letting me know that this weekend made him "decide 100%" that he's moving down here once he can get things worked out.

I just... wasn't expecting this. Someone who seems functional and respectful and sweet and great to talk with and awesome at sex wants to move down here and presumably keep things going. What's the catch? 😅

I guess I just wasn't expecting to come across anything like this any time soon. I had pretty much resolved to stay single and screw around as I saw fit. This obviously doesn't mean that he's going to show up at my doorstep tomorrow and have me figure everything out, but it's just... odd for me, and I really don't want to fumble something that seems like it could be great if it works out.

Oy, we'll see. There are certainly worse dilemmas to have.
 
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Well. I'm still alive and kicking.

I was having my doubts last night. By the time I got home from my mandatory overtime stint, it was 3p. Made myself an early supper and ate that down and went to bed. So... let's say I made it there by 345-4p... take 15-30 minutes to fall asleep and... have to be up at 8p to get ready to return to work last night.

So. About 3-3.5 hrs or so of sleep was had yesterday, after having been up for 24 hrs straight... and then off to work my regular 8 hr shift. Which... I wasn't sure I was going to make it all the way through, honestly. I couldn't keep my eyes open in shift briefing... that's usually a bad sign. And at times, whilst doing my rounds I was finding it quite difficult to actual propel myself forward... I think I may have listed to the right quite a lot, too. I limp to that side, so when I list, it's to that side, too.

But. I made it. And I didn't die on the 30 minute drive home, either. So. Yay.

It was one of the longest, most miserable nights I've had in a very, very long time. I couldn't focus enough to read or do crosswords... or even play solitaire on the computer. I turned the tv on for noise... because I needed it. And I didn't really pay much attention to that, either. And what I saw was so interesting that I don't remember what it was now.

Natalie got the coldest of cold shoulders any time she was around me. Fuck her. I wasn't rude. I'm not trying to start shit, especially with someone I have to deal with several days of the week. But I don't want to interact with her, so I was short... not angry short, just... one word or grunt short. Leave me alone short. I think she knew because she kept coming around and she kept getting rejected. Go fuck right off, now.

I told Doug about her dealio las night, too. He was... he just stood there and stared at me like I had three heads. I told him I'd sent off an email to Lana (because I had) and that if he was interested in sending her some email regarding the situation, he should do just that.

And then I told Anne... well, Doug started telling her first... and then I joined in, because why not. And Anne had the same reaction as Doug... both of them said that it was seriously fucked up (ya think?) and... yeah. Anne said she'd try to talk to Lana about it today, too.

When I got home, I read the reply from Lana and she said that if her only reason for getting the doc's note was to avoid mandatory overtime, that was fucked up and bullshit. Well... yeah. Sorta my point. I said that Joe had told me she could work voluntary overtime but not mandatory overtime, Lana replied that if she can't work over 8 hrs, she can't do either. I replied that I don't think her note stated that she couldn't work 8 hrs, only that she couldn't work mandatory overtime... no other restrictions.

Lana said she'd run it through it's paces. So. We'll see how that goes. Since Natalie is so far up Kelly's ass and supervisors are running their own shifts with no oversight (because we don't have a director) then... I expect little will come of it. Natalie likely brought her doctor's note to Kelly and not the admin secretary that's doing admin things for us... because I don't think they'd let that go if she had. But Kelly? Yeah... I could see her letting it go.

I hope there's some backlash, for obvious reasons. And even if it's not the official kind (which, as I said, wouldn't surprise me, then at least make it be known, to everyone who works for us, what she's done. It will not be well received, for obvious reasons. Obviously. (How many times did I say obvious/obviously in that paragraph???)

And now I gots to roll out. Cheers.
 

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So I get woken up at 1:30am to my phone ringing. I answer:

[Sleepily af] "... hello?"
INTJ: "You were asleep, weren't you?"
Me: "At 1:30am on a weekday? Nah..."
INTJ: "I'm sorry. I just got back from a bike ride and wanted to know if you were up to hanging out."
Me: "... probably not a good idea given that I'm not even awake enough to drive right now."
INTJ: "Makes sense. I'll call you later. Goodnight!"

... just... just... why? The dude has a fucking 8-5 job, same as me. WHY WOULD YOU GO ON A LATE NIGHT BIKE RIDE AND THEN CALL SOMEONE EVEN LATER TO BONE DOWN ON THEM?

Yeeeeessshh.
 
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Annnnd on this week's episode of The Menopausal INTJ Lesbian Doctor I Work with Used Unfortunate Phrasing, Again...

She plopped herself down in my area (for the record, she literally has no reason to do this. Where she does her job is on the other side of the building. I think she just gets bored sometimes) and started rummaging through some mail. She tries reading some hand-written letter a patient sent her...

"She's sending me an Oreo? Is that what this is saying? Can you make this word out? Oh! It's 'area.'"

Me: "No, I think she lovingly hand-picked a single Oreo out of the pack, just for you. And she's sending it your way."

[Doctor proceeds to fucking lose it]

"We really should spend more time together. I feel like you could be dead asleep and I'd still have a good time with you."

... I know what she meant, but I will never cease to be amazed at her talent for conveying what are probably innocent sentiments in the most problematic way lmao
 
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Was rummaging through some old writings the other day and came across this from 2012...

Big 45 test results:

HIGH ~ Quickness 90% (intellectually independent)
Rationality 86% (direct, logical)
Toughness 82% (thick skinned)
Intellect 82% (intellectual, analytical)
Competence 82% (intellectual, brainy)
Happiness 78% (self content, positive)
Introspection 78% (self searching)
Creativity 78% (iconoclast)
Depth 78% (mental explorer)

LOW ~ Sociability 34% (withdrawn, hidden)
Self-Disclosure 34% (private, contained)
Warmth 34% (disinterested in others)
Pleasantness 30% (aloof or disagreeable)
Group Attachment 18% (loves solitude)
Gregariousness 14% (quiet, reclusive)
Talkativeness 14% quiet, (stealthy, invisible)

Yup. That pretty much sums it up, I think. :cool:

Well. For the 2nd day in the row, nobody got held over. Actually, Rita stayed for two hours. An opening that is there every day. They were filling it. And then they stopped filling it and now they seem to be filling it again. And... honestly, that sucks because now Rita has done a whole 2 hrs and moved her name on the mandatory list, which puts Doug at the top of the list and then either me or Malachi (I'm not sure how they determine who's next on the list since we both worked mot on the same day?) even though we just did mandatory overtime.

It's my last night and I will be mad as fuck if I have to do mot tomorrow morning. Seriously.

I've heard nothing about the Natalie and the note situation. They best figure that out and get that taken care of or... it won't be long and everyone on 3rd shift will have a doc's note. Malachi said he'd get one, as did both Rita & Doug. Let them figure it all out when nobody on 3rd shift can do mot, if that's the way they want to play it.

Once I am off in the morning (assuming I am off in the morning) I don't go back to work until next Tuesday. I then work Tues & Wed and do not return to work until next Monday. (It was supposed to be that I worked only Tues & Wed every week for the entire month of July, but... of course, most of my leave requests were denied, sooooooooo...)

It's a break. I'll come back from my days off... undoubtedly both this set and the next and immediately have to do mandatory overtime, I'm sure. Because... yeah. We are severely understaffed.

They could help the problem just a wee bit if they took the new dude, Cooper, and moved him from 2nd shift to 1st shift until the next shift bid (which is in... late Sept./early Oct. I think)... he could step right into Billy's hours on 1st and that would help 3rd shift out a lot. And... doesn't hurt 2nd shift.

But are they going to do that? Of course they're not. Let's not be all like... logical and rational and shit. Besides, it's much more amusing to fuck 3rd shift over and over and over and over.

I've also noticed that 1st shift isn't sending out their emails for help and being a team player with all this mandatory overtime. Oh yeah... because their week of having to do mot is over and now they're back to not giving a fuck anymore. They cried like bitches when some of them had to work mot for a whole week in a row. We're going on... like... 8 wks now with mot being a two to three times a week thing (if not more). Those poor suffering 1sties... the horror. :rolleyes:

I have no plans for my extra days off. I had a whole lot of plans for things to do on these (and the days I asked for but didn't get off) a couple of months ago. But... they're all gone now. Now I just want to... chill and relax. I wanted to go visit some local museums and go off to a dinosaur dig (I've been there before, but it's been a while) and... some of those things are 3 or 4 or 5 hr drives away and at this point in time, that all seems like a waste of a day off.

I mean... I want to do them, but I just don't have the want to, of that makes sense? Like... any day I'm not at my house is a day I'm missing out on rest and recuperation and I feel like going anywhere and doing anything is going to be more like work than just staying home and chillin'.

I dunno. I've no ambition. That's really what it amounts to, honestly.

I might contact RN this upcoming set of extra days off or maybe next... to see if she & her bf wanna hang out. She had contacted me back in... late May, I think it was, and asked me if I was going to come over this summer and go swimming and I said at the time, that I had hoped so... but that's right when things started getting crazy with work... and I didn't have any extra days off and then I got that stupid respiratory virus (which, 6 wks later is still lingering) and... yeah. So now we're into July and I've still not made it over there.

I'll text her and see if she has any compatible days off and feels like hanging out for a day. That'd be nice and relaxing... just hanging out poolside, drinking adult beverages and swimming. The big pup would be excited, too. He loves to go swimming. (The wee pup wouldn't be coming... he'd be too afraid.)

So... we'll see how that works out... or doesn't... I guess.

All I know is today. Tonight. I must survive 8 hrs of sitting in central control and hopefully make it to morning with no mot and... then I'm free for quite a few days in a row. And I so very much need that, you have no idea. (Or maybe just a wee bit of an idea!)

So much truth here!

 

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Huh.

I was just sitting here thinking it was Friday because I've been up all day. Then I realized that it's not Friday, but still Thursday and I made it all day (after coming home from work) without taking any sort of nap or anything. Weird. Of course, I've just eaten (bones... love me some bones!), so the moment I go to watch tv or videos or anything, I'm going to be out like a light. That's how it works. But... I don't really feel tired, despite being up for over 24 hrs already.

My new boots came today! So happy! That's a fast turnaround, yo. I just ordered them like... two days ago? Maybe three? And they're at my house already. Bonus. These are my hiking boots, Merrell brand actually, that I use for work and most every day stuff... unless I'm in sandals during the summer or whatever. But... on the 4th, my nephew had these shoes (loafers, I guess?) and they looked really sweet... like some nice knockabout shoes. (Nothing you'd want to be doing a lot of walking or standing in) I tired them one... like them, became determined to buy the same exact pair. Only in my size. (The boy's much taller than I so him's got bigger feets)

They're Hey Dude brand. I'm not sure I got the same exact pair as he has, though. He got his at a sporting goods store. I didn't want to actually go to the store (the horror!), so I looked online and all they had available at the store (for that shoe) were sizes that are too big for me. So... that sucked. But... at least I knew what they were called and what "model" (for lack of a better term... I'm sure they're not called "models" in shoes, but they are in cars... so there ya go!)

So... I can't remember if I ordered from Hey Dude directly or from Amazon. But... those should be along before too long as well. Those will be my summer around the house kicks. Sitting on the patio kicks. My shorts kicks. Yay.

Just looked at my work email to see if anything interested has happened since I left. Got an email from Barb (records coordinator) about this wasn't done and that wasn't done when I worked with the female unit on Monday. Nope. It sure wasn't. I've told them half a billion times to not put me on a unit when I do overtime because, I rarely ever work a unit on 1st shift. Almost never. I can't tell you the last time I worked a unit before Monday. Years ago.

They do all this stupid shit of logging when the kids breath, blink, etc. (Ok... go in their rooms, out of their rooms, to dining, blah, blah, blah) Well. I've done that. Once. In training. Five or six years ago. No earthly idea how to do in our computer system. Even when I was doing training, I had to basically have Kelly do it for me, because it's such a convoluted bunch of horseshit.

When Marisala told me I was working the unit... the female unit... I said no. Like... three times. And she said I'd be fine. So I decided I was fine and did what I could do out of it (which was more or less making sure the female delinquents didn't kill me or each other) whilst being up for nearly 24 hrs (by the time I left) so... yeah. All that shit didn't get done.

And I just sent that reply email to Barb. I don't remember who did what when, nor do I fucking care. Nor am I going to make any attempt to "fix it". I don't know how and I don't care to know how. And... if they'd not be stupid about shit, then this would've been a non issue. But... they weren't. So there ya go.

So. I'm sure that reply email is going to make people happy. 🖕:cool:🖕

Work is quite brilliant anyway. They just started handing out the new uni shirts yesterday (I didn't ask for any... the ones I have are just fine) and... boy were we surprised to find out that our uni color changed. To the same color as the inmate shirts. I'll let you ponder why having staff and inmates dressed alike is stupid as fuck for a moment or two...

Ok. Done? Yeah. Uhm... dunno what dumb motherfucker did that. But they're a dumb motherfucker. Let's make it so it's hard to distinguish inmates from staff... what could possibly go wrong??? :rolleyes: Todd got his shirts and immediately gave them back. Along with a note, which I'm sure wasn't not the most pleasant note in the world. (I saw it on the shirts, but didn't read it... even though I really, really, really wanted to do so!)


There's more... but... if I listed all the stupid, we'd be here all day and all night. And it'd not be a fun read. Or maybe it would... maybe reading about utter stupidity makes you smile. I dunno. But... I'm still not going to do it.

Leah said that Kent (2nd shift) got another job. So... there's another person jumping ship. Leah applied for some jobs. (I didn't see anything that would suit me this past week) Doug had an interview today. Malachi... well, as I said before, every day he shows up, I'm surprised.

The ship... she's sinking down...


I'm ok with that. I'd prefer to hop off onto a life raft before she goes topsy turvy uppsy downsy, but... whatever. I have no more fucks to give where it concerns my current job. Whatever. What happens, happens.
 

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A nice day outside, though it got much warmer than I thought it was going to...

But... we stayed out all day (until chow time) playing and gaming and just chillin' on the patio. Good times. If I were retired, I would do this nearly every day, all summer long. So. Relaxing.

Got a call from work today. Asking if I could work overtime Monday. You know... to cover the shift my vacancy caused. Because they're stupid motherfuckers.

Yeah, sure... I'd like to come work on the night I took vacation. Absofuckinglutely. :rolleyes:

I found a job or two to apply for... so, that's something. I'll probably do it tomorrow. I've been out in the heat all day and concentrating on filling out applications is not what I'm about right now.

I've interviewed... well, not really... for one of the jobs before. It was the fake 5 min interview (that was conducted by what I now know were brand new line staff with no experience in the field) that I got when the other agency in our facility was first moving in/starting up. There's a supervisor opening... which is what I applied for... less pay, but similar and it's working days with weekends/holidays off.

Thing is, I'm not sure I want that job. I mean... it'd be ok (assuming I actually get a real interview this time) for a minute, until I could find something else, but... the director of that agency came from our facility with no experience in being a director (and is a raging idiot, ala our former director) and so the place is an absolute disaster. But... I'd be administration and not a peon.

Again... assuming they would actually give me a proper interview instead of the bullshit I got last time.

If I walked in and saw I was being interviewed by line staff again, I'd just walk back out. Waste my fucking time once... you'll not do it again, ya fuckwits.

The other position is as a victim advocate. Basically helping victims of violent crimes work their way through legal proceedings and finding them support services and that sorta thing. I can do that. I'm not sure that this is my wheelhouse... but... it's something. And an application isn't a job, sooooooooo...

Best case, I find a job... sooner rather than later. Worst case the place bellies up and... well, whatever. I'd be nice if the agency bellies up, if they offered some sort of severance package. Because I'd take that, rather than reassignment. Which... I don't think they'd do the reassignment thing anyway. I don't think they have to... unless maybe people wanted to go to adult corrections, which I do not. I want to go a new route, thanks.

I dunno. We'll see how it all shakes out, I suppose.

Supposed to go to RN's tomorrow for some swimmin' and hanging out. But... may have to reschedule cuz the weather's looking a little shit. We're supposed to have storms tonight... severe ones. Professional storm chasers are in the state (though not local... yet) and shit's happening down the way from us to the west... which means it's headed this way. Yippee skippy.

The upside is that I have Sun/Mon to reschedule, if need be.

We'll see how that shakes out, too, I suppose.
 

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'Tis Sunday. I've one more lovely night off before I have to go back.

Thankfully, for only 2 days before I have a four day (which should've been five day, just sayin'...)... unfortunately, I'll probably get stuck with mandatory overtime as soon as I walk back in the door Tuesday night. If not Tuesday, then Wed... because that's just how it's going to be. I know that writing is on the wall.

Although I've received no calls from work in 2 days. That doesn't mean there wasn't overtime, just that they might've actually pulled their heads out their asses long enough to know I'm on vacation.

Last time I wrote, it was Friday. We went to the bar on Friday... that was yummy. I was going to go to RN's on Saturday, but... the weather wasn't good for it. It stormed early Saturday morning. Knocked some branches down in the yard, yet again. (Never plant a sycamore tree... worthless fuckers. They throw bark all the time and in a wind storm, branches all over the place. Such a shit fucking tree.) Nothing too serious. The biggest issue was a dead branch (from a previous wind storm) that was hung up in other branches decided to come down. It hung up on another, lower limb and then the weight of the dead limb (branch, whatever) pushed the branch it was hung up on down onto the power line.

No bueno. My bil has a long handled tree trimmer thing, so he cut it all out. Even the low hanging branch, just to keep it from ending up on the line if it breaks in the future. There are some other, good sized, dead branches way up in the tree... probably from last fall when we had the 85 mph winds come through. Someday they fall... probably in another wind storm... and hopefully not on anyone. They're not small.

My bil & I chatted and cleaned up branches and what not. Coughing and hacking through it all because we're both allergic to the fucking tree. Joy of joys. But we got the job done and get all the branches cleaned up.

Later on the in the day, it just poured rain. Like a cow pissing on a rock as my dad would say. So... pretty much yesterday was a bust. I thought today was going to be a bust too, but it turned out to be a beautiful day.

RN & I had rescheduled for today, but then she cancelled. I wasn't surprised. We made plans to maybe hang out at some point next weekend. But I'm not holding my breath on that. It's all good, though. If I spend all of next weekend living like I did today? I'm good. Really, really good.

We went out to eat last night at Pizza Ranch. My mom loves their fried chicken/chicken gravy. (Yeah... fried chicken at a place called Pizza ranch, who'd a thunk it?) It's buffet... so I'm munching on salad and pizza and stuff. A few waffle taters and wedge taters, cuz why not...

A family came in and they had five sons. The smallest was... maybe 3? And he was not a happy camper. The two smaller ones were probably between 7-9, then were was a medium sized one that I'll say was probably 11 and the biggest one was probably 14. It appeared that one of the smaller ones (the 7-9 range ones) had a baseball game and the family & gma had come in to eat after. The wee one was done. With everything. He didn't even want ice cream. He was not (most of the time) loud or anything, but he made it known, repeatedly, that he wasn't having any of it, for any reason, anymore.

Baseball boy tripped over his own feet and nearly face planted twice. He also ate two huge plates of salad (I'm talking heaping... way larger than my one and only plate), several pieces of pizza and then started on the desert bar. (My mom was wondering where all the food was going, he was just a little lad. As I said between 7-9 yrs old)

At one point one of the smaller ones (not baseball boy) went to the soft serve machine and he was balancing his little plastic cup (they have cups for ice cream) on a plate and trying like hell to hold all that together plus stand on his tip toes and try to reach the lever... he just couldn't do it... and even if he had done it, it'd have gone onto the floor because he just couldn't manage all of that at once.)

I went over and asked if I could help him cuz watching him was painful. He was trying so hard and he just wasn't big enough to get it done. So... I helped him get his ice cream, he said thank you, and back to his table he went. We left shortly after that... stuffed to the gills. (Because I had to have two of those cups of ice cream... yummy! 🍦)

When I have a few minutes to kill I've been watching TikTok vids lately. I have the app, don't have an account... just scroll through and watch random shit... cuz why not?

There seems to be a trend of dudes in gym shorts or sweat pants wagging their untethered dicks around for... I have no idea what reason. It's a very odd thing to me, honestly. Stranger still, there seems to be some odd butch lesbian thing were they basically do the same thing (but with hip thrusts) despite the fact that they have no dicks to fling at the camera.

I'm all about you doing you... I'm just... I don't get it. Particularly lesbians hip thrusting non existent dicks. Does that turn on other lesbians? I'm very confused. I mean... I sorta get dudes doing it... I mean, a lot of dudes and their dicks are besties, right? And they think everyone should love their dick as much as they do. And they think that women should be turned on by their dick waggling and... probably some are, but I'm guessing a whole lot more aren't.

But... lesbians don't have dicks. Soooooooo... 🤷‍♂️

And then... other lesbians are mad at the wagglin' lesbians cuz... toxic masculinity?

I'm so confused. I have no idea. Just an observation I've made. I'd rather see puppy dog vids, thanks. Or anything but loose dicks flapping around inside of sweats. Seriously.

People are strange, that's all I gotta say. You'd think they'd have something better to do or... something. But I guess not.

It does make me wonder what kind of videos myself & my friends would've made if we'd have had TikTok back in the day. It's hard to figure, to be honest, because we weren't sitting in the house thinking up new and unusual ways to sling our dicks around. I mean... we were out and doing shit. All. The. Time.

So... I could see us making TikToks of us doing sports stuff. Or making a TT of the fish we caught. Or just random silly stuff here and there. I could see some of making TTs of us flexing our muscles. (I say some because some of my friends didn't have any muscles. My friend Marty was athletic but a not a muscle on him.) I think we'd have done that stuff... maybe some TTs of our rides, our bikes (cuz we used to customize the shit outta the bikes).

I dunno. I'm not sure that wiggling our wieners around would've been something on our mind. Not that we didn't do silly stuff like that, but it was actually pretty rare because most of us were athletes so we were more into sports and working out and being fit than in wiggling about.

Or maybe we'd have been all over the dick pics, who the hell knows?
 

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The last day of my mini staycation is over. Bummer dude.

I still have this night... all night... and then we're back at the grind tomorrow night. I don't wanna. I really don't. It's very depressing to have to go back. Not just because I don't want to go back to that job in particular, because we all know the sitch on that... but I really just don't want to work anymore. I mean, I will because I have no other option... and if I find a decent enough job, it might be that I don't even mind it so much.

But goddamn. I've been at it for nearly 40 yrs. Working, I mean. Quite often doing hard, physical work... I just feel like that should be enough, honestly. It's quite obviously not... I've got at least 8 more years to work full time. Because in the US health insurance is tied to your job and you can't (at this time, at least) get medicare (or whatever) until you're 65... I have no other option that to remain employed full time with a job that offers health insurance. (Which... not all do.)

By then I'll be up to nearly 50 yrs, solid, of working. Seriously. That's enough, innit? Jesus Christ. And I feel bad for the young un's out there... if nothing changes, you'll probably be working until you're much older.

So... yeah. I'm pretty much done... not that I wouldn't go to a job and do a job at it, because that's just not my nature... but I just feel like I shouldn't have to and every time I have a nice bit of time off... well, it just makes it all the more clear.

But... yeah... whatever. It is what it is, right? (God I hate that saying, but sometimes... it is what it is, eh?)

Slept in a bit (930p) and hung out with the pupperoos all day. Gaming on the patio. I did wake up in pain, though. I've not had that kind of morning in a good long while and I actually thought, because of my pain levels, that some horrible weather thing was happening or going to happen sometime soon...

And... nope. It was a beautiful day. My body just decided to be an asshole today. I had so much pain, though, it woke me (else I might've slept in a bit later) and... I just couldn't find any comfortable way to lay that didn't aggravate it, so... up we did go... some food we did eat and then we sucked down enough ibuprofen to choke an elephant and went about our day. Because... what the fuck else are you supposed to do?

Chronic pain peeps, I know you feel me...

It stayed away most of the day after that... it was absolutely beautiful outside... low 80s, low humidity, nice bright sun... just a perfect summer day, really.

The pain stuff came back toward the end of our time outside, though. It wasn't as... involved? No... not the word. Encompassing? I'm not sure that's the word for it, either. Let's just say that there wasn't as much of it. Less bits affected, though the pain level is/was about the same. Same pain, less surface area involved. Which makes it better (not really) but only just. I'm hoping it gets over itself after massive dose of ibuprofen I just took a bit ago... but that remains to be seen. Sometimes, it just is... whether you want to be or not.

And I don't have any narcos in the house right now. So... I don't even have a secondary solution. Yay!

Work finally called today. Wondered what was taking them so long. But it was for 2nd shift coverage on Thurs. Like... hell to the fucking no... that's my damn day off. Fuck. Off. Let some 1st shift do some overtime, the little bitches.

I'm wondering if Kent actually put in notice. Lacey said he'd found another job and they're like besties (she described him as like a brother to her) so... I'm assuming she'd know. I like Kent, but as I've told Lacey before I don't trust him... not because I don't think he's trustworthy... I think he probably is... but I don't know him like that and this is a place where you really, really, really don't want to make the mistake of trusting the wrong people. (Which is why I only trust Malachi, Isaiah and Lacey. Period.)

That could be why they have overtime on 2nd shift... or it could just be some other random bit of stupid, because the place is just fucking full of that.

I wonder if Natalie using a doc's note to avoid mandatory overtime has been addressed yet. Or if it will be. Because I (and many others) will be greatly annoyed if it is not... on either count.

What bothers me more than her dumping more on the rest of us who aren't dirty like that is the fact that she is dirty like that. I mean... I've known her for a long little while. She wasn't dirty when she started, but she got that way. And... we all know that. We all know she gets away with shit she should not and has for quite a long time... but it's always been mostly petty stupid shit. Annoying? Yes, absolutely... but then you're like... Ah, fuck... well, that's Natalie. You know?

But this shit? This is some next level shit. This is some brass fucking balls shit. I wouldn't have suspected her to go this dirty. In fact, I'd pretty much not expect anyone I work with to stoop to this level of dirty. Yes... people abuse sick leave, even when they know doing so is going to fuck someone else over... but that's like, petty shit too, most of the time. I mean... it's not like day after day after day. It's a now and then and it's goddamn annoying, but... there's not a whole lot you can do about it so... whatever.

But this shit? Bailing when we're getting hammered day after day after day... when you know doing so just dumps more on people that are already being dumped on... a group that you belong to? That's a whole different level of dirty. And it's of the unforgivable variety, which I'm sure I said before. There's some shit you don't do, some lines you don't cross... and she just pitched herself right over that line...

So. Now I'm curious to see how this all plays out. If anything is going to be done about it, particularly when it's so fucking blatantly obvious.

Having shitty coworkers at a shitty job just makes every all the worse, eh?

This sums it all up quite nicely, eh?


And announced by Illya Kuryakin... or maybe (probably) you know him as Ducky. Nothing like dating one's self, eh? Though I have to say Illya Kuryakin (and his buddy, Napoleon Solo, are nearly before my time...)
 

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I have to go to work tonight and I do not want to... yeehaw!

Like... shocker... I know.

I woke up in mid thought today. Which... there are two parts to that. 1) I tend to do that a lot. Anybody else? And I don't mean like... dream thoughts, I mean regular normal thoughts. Anybody? I do it often and I think it's maybe not a particularly common thing. Or maybe it is and it is fleeting for most? I have no idea. 2) My thought was that Natalie has become the new Sarah at work. Which is... well... Sarah is legendary. Not for good reasons.

Sarah is probably the worst employee in the agency's history. She too, had doc's notes. Nonsensical ones, like Natalie's... for example she could physically restrain a youth or participate in a what is, essentially, a physical altercation with one or more youthful offenders... but she couldn't vacuum. (The list is long, this is just one example.)

She carried a large tote bag full of drugs to work every night. I worked with her 5 nights a week for several years and never saw her once take any of those drugs. Sarah slept through most shifts. When administration was told she was sleeping, we were told to leave her alone because she was "meditating".

The list is long... and it doesn't end with the laziness and avoidance of work. She was also a general nut bag.

She was still taking showers with her sons (her own admission) when they were 10 yrs old. Her dog could speak. She was psychic. She thought she was an actress. Just... all manner of really weird nutball shit.

Sarah was... out there. She was universally hated in the agency because of all the shit she was allowed to get away with and... Natalie is heading in that direction. She doesn't have admin letting her run amok (yet) but she does have Kelly and Owen and previously Sam was in on that, too. Natalie never had to do a lot of stuff not because she would claim an injury or illness (well, previous to the current sitch) she would just cause such a fucking uproar that they just let her do what she wanted to avoid confrontation. (She was so rude to the nurses at the hospital that they wouldn't send her over there because of it... which is exactly what Natalie wanted.)

And so we've already got the start of that history and then the note getting starts...

So. That was what I was thinking when I woke up. Yay. Can't even escape the nonsense when I'm asleep.

I've just finished chow and have come back down here to the cave... gotta finish laundry, but I've all the sudden got a pounding headache. That's fucking annoying. Took some ibuprofen, so hopefully that'll take care of the situation cuz you can bet for sure 100% that if I end up with a head banger tonight, I will 1000% be working mandatory ot in the morning. Though I'm hoping that no calls for 1st shift ot since I've been gone (5 days) is a good sign...
 

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Last night of work! Huzzah!

And central control night. And not ot last night. And a four day weekend.

It'll all go by too quickly, but... whatever. Gotta get the joys outta what I can get them out of, right?

We got tshirts for work. They're gray. They look like tshirts for a summer camp. But... they're soft and comfortable and probably less hot than the polos. I'm not sure they're a good idea, though, particularly for women. Because... tshirts tear and quite easily. When we tussle with the inmates, sometimes shirts get torn... but it's a bit harder to tear a polo and... a lot of people, myself included, also wear a tshirt under the polo shirt... for the reason that if it tears, you've still got a shirt. (Yes, work has extras but not always in all sizes, sooooooooo...) Most women wear a tshirt under the uni polo.

You can't really wear a tshirt under a tshirt. I mean... I guess you can, but it'd look weird, eh? I don't know that I've ever seen someone do that before. Not in real life, at least. I wouldn't ever do that.

So... I think I'm only going to work my tshirts on days I'm in central control. Which works out because that's two days and we only got two tshirts.

They also changed the inmates' unis to tshirts rather than polo shirts, which is a stupid fucking idea. We have regular inmate clothing... heavy, thick cotton (really thick)... but when kid reach a certain "level" in the behavior management system, they could choose to wear a (softer, more comfortable) polo shirt instead. Now they're done completely away with the polos and have given the inmates on the highest level tshirts. (As of last night, actually)

Thing is... we used to have tshirts. We got rid of tshirts for a very specific reason. Safety and security. Tshirts are not safe for our kids. And the reason for that is impulsivity and mental health issues. We took the tshirts away (we thought for good) because we got tired of going into cells to cut tshirt's off kids' necks when they were doing their stupid ass suicide attempts.

Tshirts are easily torn... and if you tear them, wet them, then twist them tight before you tie them around your neck? They're very difficult to get off... even with an emergency cutting tool. In the past, we've almost had kids die, even though we were right there, trying to cut that shit off. It takes time... particularly if the kid really wants to die and starts fighting you to prevent you from removing it. (That is more rare, usually they panic and decide they don't really want to die after all, but now they've got this thing wrapped tight around their neck, blah, blah, blah...)

This is what happens when you leave a secretary in charge of a correctional facility.

There's no communication and shit is just... changing and I suppose she thinks she's doing good things, but she's a fucking secretary, she's never worked as a correctional officer... she's a fucking secretary. And... it's not going well. It's really not. Nobody knows what the fuck is going on... she was supposed to be talking with the lead supervisors (and supervisors in general, honestly) and she did... for about five minutes and now... obviously not.

Don't really have any plans for the days off. Go to RN's maybe... but I don't think that's going to happen. Was supposed to have a short photo shoot on the 18th, but haven't heard anything since the initial set up, so not sure if that's going to materialize or not... I mean, it will eventually, but the date may change.

So. Likely, I'll be out back doing some patio perching and chillin' with my homedogs. Which is perfectly ok with me.
 

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Made it through my two day work week without any mandatory overtime. I'm shocked. But happy.

Spent the day sleeping on the couch with the homedogs. It rained all night and some of the day, so there wasn't going to be any patio perching and honestly, I must've needed the sleep cuz I was out... and slept well. On the couch, which isn't that comfortable (any more) and usually I can sleep there for a while, but eventually need to move to the bed.

Not today. Slept solid 8 hrs. 🤷‍♂️

The night at work was boring. The only thing remotely interesting (and it wasn't, really) was Todd being pissy. Rita said it was because of "home stuff"... which, I don't doubt. That's what happens when you let your wife (not ex wife, but wife) take your kids and whilst you stay here and support two households and only see your kids two days a week. I mean... seriously... how would that not cause agitation?

I mean, yeah... it's his fault for being a pussy whipped little bitch, but.. still. You can be a bitch and still be angry.

I spent half the night polishing keys. It's a new central control hobby of mine. At first I was just cleaning the fuck outta them because when covid rolled around, I realized how filthy and disgusting our keys are. And so I scrubbed all the filth off them whenever I was in control.

But... also because of covid our keys became icky because... some numpty halfwit(s) were spraying disinfectant into the keybox, rather than just wiping the keys down like a normal, non lazy person. This caused the keys to rust and tarnish (a lot of stuff is brass, so it all turned green) and... just... some of the key sets look like they've been at the bottom of a lake for 10 yrs, is what I'm saying. Just... not cool.

The janitor gave me a bottle toilet acid (he cleans his keys with it) and some non abrasive scub pads and... I've been cleaning rust and tarnish and other ickness off the keys now for a couple of weeks. And actually polishing them up (the brass chits, for example) and making them shine. Some of the keys will never be right again, but I can get a lot of the ickness off them so they don't look like they've been at the bottom of a pond for a decade... and that's well enough.

Nobody else understands how I can sit and do this for hours. Really, it's just... I don't even know. It's just... I get into the difference it makes in the keys? The before and after, I guess you'd say. Makes me happy. And I can just day dream away whilst cleaning them up, yeah? The night goes by quickly, because I'm fully vested in what I'm doing.

I do have to be careful, though, as my surgeried elbow is not a fan of scrubbing. That's what pushed the original injury over the edge and caused the need for the surgery and though surgery was 10 months ago... if I scrub too much, even on little things like these keys? It starts to hurt like a pre surgery motherfucker.

So, I have to be careful not to reinjure because the next fix is the big bad surgery... with them opening up my whole elbow and pins and screws and maybe even a cadaver tendon and all manner of bad stuff. So... we don't want that. (It was almost to that point when I had the surgery I had... almost couldn't do the easy surgery! Yikes!)

This Britney Spears thing... what the fuck? Ok... her dad is probably an asshole (maybe, not like I know him) and maybe he doesn't need to be the conservator (or whatever), but... every time I see/hear Britney? She looks/sounds like someone who needs a conservator. Even my mom, who doesn't know who she is, said she sounds unwell. She sounds like someone who is nuttier than squirrel shit and/or high as fuck.

I have no fucks to give about whether she's freed from her conservatorship or not, I'm just saying she doesn't come across as someone who's well, that's all. And that's not said to knock her... you don't kick when people are down. I'm just saying she doesn't seem like she's well. I hope things work out they way they need to for her to be ok.
 

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Well. That was a pleasant 2.5 days off.

Yes... I got half of tonight off. Cuz it was either that or nothing and maybe I should've just taken nothing, but... I really hate that place and any time I can get away, is good time. Besides, having the first half of tonight off actually gave me all of Monday day... so... technically, I guess it's really 3 days off, eh?

I have to go to work at 0200 of all times. But... whatever. The better four hours (most of the work should be done) and then I've two days before I get another 2.5 days off... 2.5 extra days, of course, just like this week. But in the week upcoming I have Sat off, work the last half of Sunday and then have Monday off... and then I'm pretty much done with extra days off for the foreseeable future... which sucks ass. I kinda like this barely working thing. Two days a week is a pretty decent work schedule. I need to find a job that pays me decent, has insurance and that I only have to go to 2 days a week. That would be awesome.

It's unattainable, of course. First, no place works like that and second, I couldn't afford to do that anyway. Two days of salary per week isn't going to pay many bills, I'm afraid.

I have done a whole lot of fuck all during my time off. I did get to RN's on Saturday... it was an enjoyable day. The big pup went along and enjoyed swimming. We just hung out, consumed adult beverages, played in the pool, chatted and grilled burgers. Called it an early evening... wanted to get home whilst there was still some daylight so I could spend some time playing with the wee pup, too, since he missed out. (He wouldn't have enjoyed anything about going to RN's so he was better off at home with my mom, but... he misses me & his brother when we're gone, sooooooo...)

Sunday, did a little mini photo shoot for Brent's younger son. Just catching a couple of headshots, is all. He's about 45 minutes away on a college campus, so it took like... 1000x longer to get there than it did to take the photos. Really... took maybe 10 minutes to get the actually photography bit done. They weren't anything fancy, just headshots... not even the fancy, wear a suit kind... just a few head shots. I took a couple shots each with two different backgrounds and that was the end of that.

And I didn't mind the drive, though I thought I was lost x2... I wasn't. I was just being paranoid. I hate driving places where I'm not familiar when I have someone waiting on me. It's a whole 'nother thing if I'm just...touristing or driving about for the sport of it, but... I have this young man wanting to get shit done and I was sure he had other things to do besides wait for me to figure out where the fuck I'm going... so, yeah. Paranoid of getting lost... which didn't happen.

And then I breezed outta there like I've driven there every day of my life. 🤷‍♂️

I have driven in that area before... a couple of times, but that was like... 25 yrs ago (before this young man was even born, as a matter of fact) and... yeah... shit's changed since then. So... nothing looked right and that didn't help my paranoia as I'm drive as much by landmark as anything else. (Which can be problematic if you don't frequent the area for a quarter century!)

And after that, the rest of the day was spent patio perching and hanging with my home dogz. Which is exactly what we did today as well. It is just very relaxing to me to do fuck all on my patio. Drink some Guinness, some iced tea, maybe have a snack or three (usually not, but I was starving all day today), play some games, watch (listen to) some tv, toss the disc for the wee pup, get the lil pool up for the big pup... just hanging out and doing not a goddamn thing.

I sure as fuck need to be retired.

You'd get bored, eventually. I can hear you saying it already. No the fuck I would not. I would not get bored of doing fuck all. Not ever. I would do all manner of things... a lot of patio perching, for sure... but biking (thinking about starting that, regardless), and more photography and going fishing. Take a trip out the lake or a park and just wandering the fuck around with a camera. Just doing whatever the fuck I feel like doing... getting up at 0500... sleeping till noon. Whatever. Whatever I felt like doing, not anything I had to do.

I guess that's it more than anything, innit? Not having to do something... but doing what you want. Not something you get to do a lot of when you're working for someone else.

Ah, well... the lives of most of us, eh?

I need to apply for a couple of jobs I saw... we'll see how that works out. I'm aiming a little lower, pay wise... or I'm willing to, at least. Get the fuck out and sort the rest of it out later. Not getting paid would suck... but being out, having no debt + a large nest egg squirreled away would make taking a bigger pay cut more... palatable. Take a little bit less now and keep looking for something more suitable.

The key at this point, really, is to just get the fuck out. I lose so much (tons of vacation, for instance) but... peace of mind is what we're aiming for here. (And not like I can fucking use my vacation anyway, as the beginning of this post pointed out.) So... we'll see.

Applications are jobs, anyway, are they?

Bezos and friends are going to launch tomorrow, eh? I hope that old lady doesn't explode or something. That's a lot of Gs for an old person to pull. I mean... I'd be excited as fuck if I were her and I wouldn't even care if I died, cuz at a certain age, do you really care that much? I think it's awesome for her, I just... it makes me worry. I don't know why.

And I hope to fuck the damn thing doesn't just blow up... since it's on a proper rocket and all that.

Blowing up is no good. I remember when Challenger blew up. I was working a temp position were my mom worked and my job was to snap the little spinny bit onto the top of a spice container lid. You know the bit that spins around to close it, open the big hole or open the sprinkle hole? (sprinkle hole, lol... didn't know what else to call it!) Yup... just snapping that bit onto the top of a lid. All day long. Big honking crates full of these things.

Since we were temps (and mostly the children of employees) and the job was mind fucking numbingly boring, we were the only people in the building that could bring headphones... at that time, it was just the am/fm radio, of course... with the headphones.

So... I'm sitting next to this guy Mike... he was in my sis's class in school, so I knew who he was, and we're just snapping away on these lids, headphones on... bopping to the music... and then the interruption for the announcement that the space shuttle Challenger had blown up just after launch.

I don't know if me & Mike were listening to the same radio station (probably) but we both stopped and looked at each other at the same exact time. Like... holy fuck, did you just hear what I just heard sorta thing. I went home (just a few blocks away) at lunch time to watch the news... just riveted for that entire 30 minutes or whatever.

I don't really remember the deets, to be honest. I just remember me and Mike looking at each other at the same time and then going home to watch the news. Just... yeah. Crazy shit.

Anyway. I think it's time for me to dip outta here and see what's what on the job front. Find something to apply for, maybe... and keep plugging away at getting out.
 
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