Personality Cafe banner

13981 - 14000 of 37155 Posts

·
Referral Princess
Joined
·
1,386 Posts
I'm appalled at the back stabbers and gossipers and liars and all the negative people out there.

Listen up INFJs - do not trust anyone but your beloved cherished ones. Do not reveal information, especially if it can be used against OR if you feel like your sharing may help someone out if they just know what's being said - no- step aside and let God (higher power) take care of it. He will let those people find out themselves. Do not get involved because people out there do not have the hearts of good motives. And if they do, keep them close and love them that much more.

Please be careful.

I'm serious.
 

·
MOTM October 2013
Joined
·
6,423 Posts
Today I skyped with my INFP cousin who I'm extremly close with. I listened as she talked about her cutting problem, repeating things she'd already told me, saying things that were new to me and sharing some more gruesome details. And as I sat there and listened to her with my face totally blank, I was screaming on the inside because I couldn't help her and hug her and make all her pain go away. I just listened and sometimes I feel like that's not enough. Even though it's a mental thing that she has every month and she's taking pills for it, I still feel like I should be doing something more. When she still lived in the same country as me, I could see when she'd had bad days and I could hug her and listen to her talk everyday, but since she's moved to America we only talk once a week on skype, and barely call because it's not so easy to communicate more.

I'm just so scared that one day I'll wake up and she's dead and I'll feel so guilty because of our whole family I'm the only one who knows what she's been through and I'll feel like I should have done something more. It's so terrifying, I wanna scream.

And maybe, on a more selflish note, I feel like since she's been like this I couldn't really talk to her about my own problems because she has so much of her own. I just feel kinda lost and don't have the energy to get back up to try again when I feel like I'm all alone, because, before I had her, like she had me. But now no one else knows how I'm really feeling and I feel like the only thing I've been doing for the past three years is lying. Lying to others about feeling fine and being happy and lying to myself about the same thing.

I feel like exploding. And that's bad and really shouldn't happen, because I don't know what I'll do if I do.

(Maybe I should have put this in the rant thread instead, or maybe not. I'm confused)
If you're seriously worried she's going to hurt herself, you might want to report it.

And not being able to make her feel better...don't worry about that...from someone who's been through similar straits, it's just enough that you're THERE for her. Truly. It sounds small, but it's really not.

Don't neglect yourself, either! If you want to talk, I'm here.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,644 Posts
"Trying hard"

Every time someone says they are trying hard.. Even myself at times.. it is like this.


A dog trying to catch his own tail.. Confusing to look at. horrible in a way.

"Now you got it.. now you dont... Grrr.... Hihi.. come here tail... You stupid tail.."

it is passive involvement. Said to well, belong mostly to passive-agressives.. I know someone who is the essens of this.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8 Posts
If you're seriously worried she's going to hurt herself, you might want to report it.
She is seriously hurting herself, that's why I'm so scared. Her mother knows about it, her father does to an extent so they know not to leave her alone too much. It's just that her mother can be kinda hurtful with her comments even though she doesn't mean it or she kinda acts in a way which will upset my cousin, which is bad when she's in the state she's in and I just worry, you know? When her mother goes back home (she's here with my family at the moment because she's selling her old house) she's going to get her professional help, because my cousin knows there is a problem and she wants the help so much that just the promise of finding a psychologist/psychatrist helped her through last month's hard patch.

And not being able to make her feel better...don't worry about that...from someone who's been through similar straits, it's just enough that you're THERE for her. Truly. It sounds small, but it's really not.
Thanks, Yeah, I know. It was just the raw nerves talking yesterday and I felt overly helpless. Still I would feel better if I could just hug her tightly, because I can't really do that over a computer. :tongue:

Don't neglect yourself, either! If you want to talk, I'm here.
This made me really happy, honestly, I'm grinning like an idiot. :kitteh: Damn, now I really want to give you a hug too I'm warning you though, I may take you up on that offer!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,363 Posts
I'm appalled at the back stabbers and gossipers and liars and all the negative people out there.

Listen up INFJs - do not trust anyone but your beloved cherished ones. Do not reveal information, especially if it can be used against OR if you feel like your sharing may help someone out if they just know what's being said - no- step aside and let God (higher power) take care of it. He will let those people find out themselves. Do not get involved because people out there do not have the hearts of good motives. And if they do, keep them close and love them that much more.

Please be careful.

I'm serious.

So very true.
 

·
MOTM October 2013
Joined
·
6,423 Posts
She is seriously hurting herself, that's why I'm so scared. Her mother knows about it, her father does to an extent so they know not to leave her alone too much. It's just that her mother can be kinda hurtful with her comments even though she doesn't mean it or she kinda acts in a way which will upset my cousin, which is bad when she's in the state she's in and I just worry, you know? When her mother goes back home (she's here with my family at the moment because she's selling her old house) she's going to get her professional help, because my cousin knows there is a problem and she wants the help so much that just the promise of finding a psychologist/psychatrist helped her through last month's hard patch.
I don't know if any of the below information applies to your situation, but I'll drum it out anyway! Don't let me scare you by the official-ness of some of these, either, nor feel like you have to make use of any of them. They're options that I think should be common knowledge, so I pass it on to you.

If the parents don't seem to be doing anything, you can also take it up a notch, speaking to her teachers (I'm assuming she's young enough to still be in school?) coaches, the school guidance counselor, etc. While they have less power to push her/her parents into getting help, they might also have other connections that could be useful, like being able to refer you to a good (and/or cheap, if money is an issue) psychologist. And, if schoolwork is being affected negatively by the problems, they can make life easier there.

These people would also be what they call mandatory reporters. By law, if they suspect child abuse is part of the problem, they have to report it on to an authority. It doesn't sound like this would be an issue in your case, but I thought I'd throw it out there, anyway.

Finally, if the ways she's hurting herself is suicidal, most hospitals have an inpatient ward dedicated solely to that that'll take in self-reporters who haven't yet attempted (as well as the folks coming out of the ER). The quality of those wards can be hit or miss... Most of them have counselors on-hand 24/7, and while the person is there, they try to address their problems, whether that's getting them on an appropriate medicine, getting an official diagnosis, or counseling/teaching them coping skills. They are typically inpatient, meaning the person stays there for a week or until the doctors are satisfied they're no longer a danger to themselves. Some find this intervention a real help, some don't... It's a judgement call. And of course..if you or anyone suspect she's going to make an attempt, call 911.

Also, suicide hotlines: Suicide Hotlines - Suicide.org! Suicide Hotlines - Suicide.org! Suicide Hotlines - Suicide.org!

Thanks, Yeah, I know. It was just the raw nerves talking yesterday and I felt overly helpless. Still I would feel better if I could just hug her tightly, because I can't really do that over a computer. :tongue:


This made me really happy, honestly, I'm grinning like an idiot. :kitteh: Damn, now I really want to give you a hug too I'm warning you though, I may take you up on that offer!
<hug!> Oh, I know the pain of text-only comforting. I'm glad I could be of help! And of course, the offer is still open...hang in there!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,254 Posts
Didn't sleep well last night. Well, slept ok just not for very long. (2 hrs?) So, ended up sleeping most of the day away after a bit. Still sleepy, actually. But... the time for sleeping is past, me thinks.

Had a late lunch of pizza. Concert in a few hours. IHOP after. Good times.

Still watching Orange Is The New Black... mostly now just because I'm interested to see how it all plays out. It's hard to take the show seriously because it's such a fantastically inaccurate portrayal of the goings on in a prison... just wow. I think it's probably the most unrealistic portrayal of a prison I've ever seen. Stuff that makes me laugh, it's so far from reality.

Like (female) inmates in the SHU having to take a shower while cuffed to the wall AND while a male CO stands in the shower with her to observe? Seriously? That would never, ever, ever, ever, ever happen. And if it did, the facility would have the shit sued out of it. Inmates have rights, you know. More rights than the people who work there, that's for sure. (Trust me on that...)

Also seems to be a lot of inmates wandering this prison unsupervised... though I suppose it's easier to have that hot lesbian sex if there aren't, you know, staff around watching. :laughing:

All that being said... it's still interesting enough to watch. Like a bad prison soap opera. :laughing:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
202 Posts
Bad translation of a random thought I had some days ago. I think it's pretty INFJ...


This is how are lived
My skin, my fingers, my eyes:
Everything is always new,
Nothing is ever known.

A terrified child in the glass
Gazes at a grey beard;
I am being hurled
In the chaos and fireworks,

Everyone seems to know what
He or she is doing, but not me;
Only one thing is familiar to me:

The dreaming colours,
The abstract colours,
The shapeless lights;

Only one thing reassures me:
The imaginary, the introspective,
The weaved-in-the-throat –

The silence of my emotions.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,644 Posts
Oh yes. I walked around 5 hours today wondering if should go to an concert. Havent been out drinking or partying in 8 months, and 3 days.

I finally pulled myself together.. You "Just do it"
Walking around, scanning for anyone id know... back and forth on the concert site.
Drinking and drinking.. but my self control still being somewhat unable to let go.. Watching my every step.
But I think I overrate my self control. Others seem able too aswell.. epcept a few. and some who just want fun and dance.
Id feel like having fun too, letting myself go with it. I actually know how to let go, but it would require something.
I often imagin my letting-go-self, id just be dancing with someone. Like in some movie, we would just blast everyone else away.
But then everyone would be looking.. Uh oh.. No.

Id wish someone just walk over to me.. One did ask if I knew someone they used to know.

Also I stood a while.. Looking over at someone who seemed rather alone, just looking abit around like me.
Wanting to talk to someone new, and someone else. Maybe a potential partner.
I pulled myself together, just walked over and asked.. "Want to talk?", The answer was no, and i immediately walked away.
Feeling the rejection abit, hoping I did not seem like a creep. But fair enough, And think she was waiting for someone anyway.

It was great talking to the various people I knew.
But I know tomorrow, it wont be the same.
I will feel like crap. I may regret somethings, and want to escape even more, not even able to look at facebook.

Silly talk, but yeah.. what are you doing to do... Yes, right, Yeah.

Goodnight.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
932 Posts
After feeling positively wrecked (in spirit) after the first concert, for once in my life I feel reckless when I've said a big f--- you to my thesis (which I have not done much work towards) and am going back up to Nor. Cal once again to see my favorite band.

I love them. It brings me back to my teenager years. My soul-searching days. I think I lost it somewhere these past few months (years?) and I just need that back in order to keep moving on.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,247 Posts
My favorite quote of the day:

"Nothing makes an INFJ happier than being free enough and brave enough to follow their intuition. Only their intuition can show them their true path in life. Once the compass in their hearts shows them the right way, they cannot be swayed. To go in a direction opposite of what their intuition has shown them is to destroy part of their soul. This is when INFJs are at their most stubborn. But it is also where they are at their most inspired. Beware of an INFJ who knows their path for no one can stop them."
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
8 Posts
I don't know if any of the below information applies to your situation, but I'll drum it out anyway! Don't let me scare you by the official-ness of some of these, either, nor feel like you have to make use of any of them. They're options that I think should be common knowledge, so I pass it on to you.
Thanks for the useful information! :happy: I'll definitely use it when needed.


<hug!> Oh, I know the pain of text-only comforting. I'm glad I could be of help! And of course, the offer is still open...hang in there!
You don't know how much I've appreciated this. And I'll definetly hang on :D *hugs back* :kitteh:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,254 Posts
Weekend's over now. Back to work in a few hours. :dry: And so it goes, I guess.

The concert was good last night. The only annoying thing was young 20-something females who can't hold their liquor, drinking themselves stupid just the same. They are extremely annoying and, of course, one had to come stand next to me. She was either "dancing" (flailing drunkenly) or bent in half, bawling. :dry: Seriously.

I elbowed her good a few times cuz... I didn't want her drunk ass all banging into/leaning on me. INTJ... don't like people touching me. Was also quite fearful she might blow chunks at any moment... and I didn't want of that on me, either. I didn't elbow her as hard as I wanted cuz security was about 10' away and looking right at me all night.

And then there were the guy who were supposed to be sitting next to me. Old guys. (60-somethings, if not older) And these guys apparently felt that it was quite ok for them to feel up and grind on these young drunk girls. Nasty ass creepers.

The opening band was Drake White and The Big Fire (I think, lol. Drake White, for certain.)... and how to describe this band? Countrified hipsters trying (way too) hard to be cool and irreverent. That being said... they can play, they can sing. (They don't offend the ears, at least.) But all in all? Bands like this are a dime a dozen. Same country shit you hear everywhere... country pop, it all sounds the exactly the same. And it all sucks balls.

Lynyrd Skynyrd rocked the house, of course. It was a lot of fun and worth sitting through the heat, humidity and Drake White to get to it. Played all the old songs you'd expect them to play. Free Bird was the encore performance. There was a good... 15 minute screaming guitar riff at the end of Free Bird... if everything else would've sucked, that alone would've been worth the price of admission.

I didn't bring a proper camera for photos... though I snapped a few with my cell. Nothing spectacular. Took some video during Free Bird, but I was so close to the speakers, that... it sounds atrocious, so I won't be uploading that. (What's the point?)

IHOP after that. And home. Laid about at home and watched more Orange Is The New Black. Watched an ep, slept through an ep, watched another ep. (amazingly sleeping through an ep didn't caues me to miss anything, lol) Then bed...

Laundry at the moment. And back to the grind. Yippee. Short weekend, yo. And I don't have a long one coming until Labor Day. That makes me sad. I guess I'll have to pretend to that I like going to work for a whole month in a row. Or something. :laughing: Cuz now that summer is all but over, I need to bank the shit outta vacation time for next May. I got about 100 hrs there now, I want there to be at least 160 before going to Ireland/Scotland. More, if possible.

Alrighty. Back to installing dlc... fun, fun.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,892 Posts
Was just at the store, and saw a girl I used to like/talk to, walking around with some muscled playboy. So much douche.
Well, you know what she is into now :)
She likes shrimps lol
 
13981 - 14000 of 37155 Posts
Top