What worries me the most is that how did you forgive HIM for breaking up with you when you traveled and got someone pregnant? ???I cheated on my man when we first started out. We initially met and decided to do long distance. I was going on a trip a couple months later to Thailand and he got nervous. Broke up with me on the first day I was there (he's an entp - and he was in his first year of university), and then got some check pregnant. When I heard this news my world crumbled, but I still loved him. We were talking every day when I had access to wifi but we weren't together. I was hurt but I bottled it deep deep down. Then we decided to get back together and we were still doing long distance. I was working and he was in school and I was waiting to get accepted to my school. And right before he came back I went to a small get together with girls. Needless to say I got really wasted and in the back of my head I kept saying to myself why am I doing this and trying to stop myself but I still did it. I had "sex" with a girl. And after I felt like a pile of shit. I obviously told him when he got back a few days later to visit and he didn't know how to react as it was a girl first of all, and second he never expected anything like that from me. I was half expecting to be kicked out and left behind forever and half wanting him to just forgive me but knowing I didn't deserve it. But we've stayed together since. And I didn't know why I did it. The only reason I came up with that makes sense is like some fucked up retaliation on my part for how he hurt me because I never dealt with it, and when I tried to talk to him about it he would tell me I should have been over it by now, etc etc. That doesn't make it right, no. But knowing me and my morals and how I've never ever ever cheated on anyone else, that's the only reason I can come up with. And I absolutely hate myself because of it.
By the way, if you're wondering were still together and working on things and I'm moving to be with him soon. I just want to know if anyone else who is an infj has ever done anything so terrible to the one they love. And what was the reason? How do u forgive yourself?