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Hi! This is my first post in this forum. I would like to do a little introduction first. I am M/18; I'm going to college in a few days. So here is my question: If INFPs were known to have high muscle tensions(such as myself), how can we stay calm and relaxed speaking in public like giving speeches and presentations. I've seen posts about public speaking for INFPs in this forum before. But they all said that they are all excellent speakers if they prepared the speeches. I tried this before. But the more I think/prepare it, the more tension I would get(I usually feel it around my head and amygdilla). So what is the deal? I really really want to enjoy college. But just thinking about doing presentations in front of 300 would just put me down so much already. :sad:
 

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I'm afraid I don't really have any advise for you... My experience in the performing arts (mainly ballroom) has given me the ability to assume a confident persona for up to 10 minutes at a time. I simply... Know... What to do, how to project, how to act confident when I need to.
 

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I don't know what your experience in college will be like, but I can guess that unless you have put yourself in a position deliberately to make speeches, you are more likely to only do presentations in front of much smaller audiences. Any large class I have been in has been exclusively lecture, while any presentations you would make would be in recitations sections maybe composed of 20 students. Even when I was an english major, I felt like I did more public speaking in high school ... unless you count the Shakespeare class I took which constantly involved acting. *shudders*

Speaking before groups and audiences is a struggle for me too. It is just an emotional thing to do, and there is no taking that part away. It will amplify either your energy or fear. These are things that help me. Maybe they would help you too:
  • If you can remember to do so, speak slowly. It gives you a lot more time to think.
  • If you can use a notecard, jot down an outline of the points you want to cover, and know the outline pretty well before speaking.
  • Have a confident posture, and act as though you were talking directly to different people in your audience in turn, looking them in the eye.
  • Apparently I like to give my hands an activity while I'm talking. It might not be practical to do this in front of an audience though unless you are making gestures with them.
  • Deliver your speech out-loud to yourself in slightly different ways beforehand until you get bored and don't mind sounding dumb anymore from just being used to it.
  • Walk around and try to engage the audience so you don't feel like a criminal before a jury.
  • I can't help but dread an upcoming presentation, but telling myself it will be exciting and oh it will be a great rush, and don't I want to see what will happen? actually does seem to help. Fire yourself up! Today is a good day to die, just like Crazy Horse says in Little Big Man.
 

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1) Depends on topic: if I like it or know it inside and out, I can talk on confidently; if I don't, well I recede into my shell
2) Depends on the audience: if I know them and they know me, or if I can talk to 2 primary groups of friends -one preferably on either side so it looks like I'm spreading eye contact- that's good. Otherwise, I really just want to fade into the mass and not be noticed.
3) Preparing notecards and crap has done me no good whatsoever. If I want a speech to go over well, I need a really detailed outline that is basically what I am going to say or just know it absolutely because this is the sort of stuff I know.
4) If I can have a partner or group upon whom I can interject, as opposed to being the one to start everything off, life becomes a dream.

Overall, public speaking sucks, but there are ways to get through it.
 

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The issue you talk about should always be something you are passionate about and know to bits. That brings out your natural way of communicating regardless of what it's like and it will be perceived as genuine.
In such speeches you will see little or no obstacles to presenting your thoughts.

However in situations where you have to tackle a topic which was given to you by a professor and you can not pick anything else talk about something you are passionate about and know to bits. lol

e.g. I had to hold a presentation about phoneme qualities at college (I freakin h8 to talk about phonemes!).
Basically I spent the whole presentation talking about sex:

A good example for the rising quality of the diphthong "ou" is female orgasm: ou! ou!! ou!!!

It was win for both my grade and the audience almost entirely comprised of women :crazy:

Just about anything can be related to sex. :tongue:
 

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I'm never really good around large groups of people I don't know, but I found while in high school speech that if I was really prepared to speak on a subject, and it was something I was interested in, I felt rather comfortable. If I ever started to doubt myself, however, it all went to hell.
 

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The more you do it, the more relaxed you will be about it. The first time I had to speak in front of people, I was so nervous I felt dizzy, but then I got more relaxed about it. As people said, if you know your subject well you will be fine, I have had trouble when I wasn't sure what I was saying because I would lose my thread and have no idea what i was saying, but when I know the subject well I can go off on a tangent and it is fine. Maybe try to relate it to telling a story as I find that helps. It depends on the situation really. The other week I gave a presentation in front of a room full of people and it was broadcast on the internet too! I felt really edgy beforehand, then I got going and even though my presentation went wrong on the computer I kept going okay and it was fine!
 

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When I have to public speak I try to make it as interactive with the audience as possible. When it turns into more of a question-answer convo type thing, it becomes way more relaxing.
 

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One thing I found that helps me is to train myself not to become tense. I would take a walk, take a hot shower, then sit on my bed and imagine myself in some place really serene. Once calm, I would think about public speaking. As soon as I did, I would feel anxious, but I would force myself to stop panicking and return to that calm place. Then I would imagine myself doing well on my speech. Whenever I began to feel anxious again, I would return to my happy place until I could control my anxiety. This takes practice, but it got me through my public speaking experiences!

Also, as others have mentioned before, you probably won't do much public speaking in college. The only time I did was when I took -- surprise, surprise! -- Public Speaking. :wink:
 

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To relieve the tension use hand and body gestures... they always help me when I have to speak in front of people I don't feel very comfortable with. I don't know why...
 

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Until I took a class about it I hated it SO much. I thought I would fail.
But I realized if I believe in it and care, I'm awesome.
You ask me to be detached, its like the energy drains out of me.
Some points:
I usually try to start with a narrative either rehearsed or on the fly, which I do often because it appeals to my creative side.
Projection helps - shoulders straight, voice from the gut. Confidence makes it easier.
Try to look to the middle of the room. Try not to stare implicitly at one person though.
Practice having strong visualizations that garner positive feelings - we have great imaginations and rock on good vibes.
If you can't do the rest, just remember this: Take deep breaths and RELAX. Its said that more people fear public speaking than death (wonder if that's true). I've actually seen someone pass out from a presentation because they weren't breathing.
 
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