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Ayatollah of Coca-Cola
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Very contained, which time and time again proves to be extremely unhealthy for me.

As with most of the negative emotions I feel, I generally tend to turn them inward and make myself sick with them.

The only rational reason I think I do this is because I genuinely don't want to take it out on others and make people feel uncomfortable around me. I know people who don't seem to contain their emotions at all and they can really fly off the handle and ruin the head space of people around them.

So I guess, for me, it's almost like being sick and not wanting to spread the germs. So in that regard I tend to really hole up in a bubble when I'm in a negative head space.
 

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I express anger in many different ways-

Sometimes I bottle it up and seethe silently while no one knows; sometimes I say nothing but form two hate/glare beams from my oculars.

Sometimes I just don't say anything and get over it, because whatever happened wasn't a big deal and I don't want it to ruin a friendship.

When one of my friends betrayed me and hurt my family member I actually didn't talk to her for weeks, wouldn't respond to anything she said, would sneer at her when she talked around me, would curl my lip if she walked past. Wouldn't sit next to her. I didn't even want to look at her face. It was a big betrayal.


A lot of times I cry, even though I'm not sad, I'm just so worked up. (That's especially frustrating because I'm trying so hard to look angry and mad but I end up just looking sad!)

I've also yelled before..

Often times I will create a long list of the person's flaws and wrongdoings and when/if I hash it out with them I'll tell them everything they did wrong in a long, well thought out speech form.
 

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I may be silent, and just seethe. (Rare.) You'll probably get the look of total death, lol. Catty, snarky commentary. Intense sarcasm. Yelling if it gets bad enough. I usually leave before it gets that bad, so throwing punches never really happens.
 

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I usually get very cold, sarcastic and twistedly logical, saying horrible things with a straight face... And if that doesn't work, ignore the person altogether.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
I've been known to do whats termed as the 'INFJ door slam' and cut someone off from my life. I'm no longer investing my energy. I feel that you've hurt me deeply and I'm just done. Gone.

Most often, I am just silent. Go into avoidance mode of the conflict styles. I will vent to others tho.
 

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I get angry from time to time, and I usually just bottle it up and don't say anything.
But, once every few years, and I really do mean years, when I get really, really, really angry - it's horrible.
Shaking, screaming, throwing/breaking stuff - full blown tantrum that is completely uncharacteristic of me.
It usually happens when I've been pushed too far for too long.
For example, my father who was extremely abusive to me throughout my childhood and teenage years - it was only last year that I cracked it at him and threw him out of my life.... with an unrestrained verbal assault. It was only that he was on the other end of a phone that I didn't throw something at him.
I'm like that silent type that is scary when they eventually get angry >.<
 

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I rarely get angry like super super angry but when I do all of hell breaks loose. I get this storm cloud around me and will not hesitate to strike you dead. All emotion leaves the room and all that is left is just anger and cold hard logic. This happens during a debate and my opponent strikes a chord within me and then there is no mercy because I'll destroy them without ever rasping my voice just a calculating eyebrow.
 

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Normally, I'll bottle it as not to say or do anything i may regret(which is anything i do out of anger lol). I'm like giving death glares, unyielding sarcasm, and the occasional voiced opinion in the most filtered, held back way, possible. I can get really bitter though if I don't forgive someone of their offense but i rarely stay mad for longer than a couple hours. Although there are a few select people who's personality are, in a way, opposite of mine causing us to clash often. But, I do my best to forgive as needed so that I don't get entangled by bitterness or wrapped up in being angry. Takes to much energy to stay angry for long and it wears me out.
 

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Depends...
There's the "you're dead to me" anger, this is why I have one friend.

Then there's the crying anger b/c I can't actually harm the person, mostly with family and people I don't know well.

Then there's the ranting word eruption, where I expel all of the offense that a person has made towards me, and what I think of them... this is why I don't have friends also.

Lastly, there's the violent anger where I kinda blank out and attack my oppressor... this has happened with this kid that bullied me for 3 yrs and family members who are repeat offenders of trying to humiliate me in front of others as an example, why are people so abrasive...sigh. Sometimes I just want to rip people's tongues out for being such terrible creatures... sigh...
 

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i used to bottle up all my rage and either end up hating myself, crying, or just yelling at people i diffused from that after figuring out just how unhealthy it really is. now when i get mad i usually end up telling somebody next to me just how full of shit they are in a calm controlled voice its actually kind of funny now that i think about because i do it in such a sarcastic tone nobody can tell if im joking or not. its a great way to get rid of your anger and nobody gets hurt... well most of the time :->
 

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It depends on the level of anger I feel... for the most part I try to shut down the emotions asap (with varying degrees of success) and think about why it made me angry and what I need to do to stop the situation from having that much power over me.

However, if I see someone I know being maliciously humiliated and there is no option to walk away... I become truly enraged... I become cold, hard, logical and contemptuous. If the other person does not back down, for the next ten minutes I dedicate myself to emotionally dominating and eviscerating my target until they are as humiliated as the person they were attempting to abuse. By all accounts it is not very pretty to watch and even the person I am defending feels scared of me by the end of it.

It is not a side of myself I am particularly proud of, hence the desire to shut down the emotions asap...
 

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I've been known to do whats termed as the 'INFJ door slam' and cut someone off from my life. I'm no longer investing my energy. I feel that you've hurt me deeply and I'm just done. Gone.

Most often, I am just silent. Go into avoidance mode of the conflict styles. I will vent to others tho.
I've done this also
 

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INFP 648 sx/sp
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Generally I remain calm. I get very Te-ish, I use cold logic and am matter-of-fact and distant. I'm a little pissy, dry, sarcastic and to the point, all in quite a cold way. I attack things, problems and people very point-by-point, driving it home. I show very little emotion really. Anger, but...yeah, a cold, calm anger.

That's not to say I feel fine and aren't angry, because I am. I just don't give a fuck, if I'm angry to the point where I show it then my focus is on cutting into the other person rather than getting hysterical. I don't find it constructive at the time. Getting hysterical about anything is something I would only do in the company of someone I feel safe being vulnerable around, safe showing that side of me to, it's something I do when I'm willing to let myself be weak and seek reassurance. When I'm angry, I'm not in the mood for that. I talk more quietly if anything, I don't yell at all.
I don't like getting emotional when angry. At the end of it, it can give the impression that I'm spent, I've given what I had to give, and some might take that as weakness I guess. I don't give a fuck but if I'm angry at someone I'm not ceding them anything, including the impression that I might be done with them.

I feel very much in control of my anger if/when it happens, I have little interest in moderating the situation or withdrawing if it ever comes. I have faith in my judgement in that regard. I have little interest in getting emotional and trying to convey my feelings. My anger comes out quite pointedly, I guess. I put the bulk of the characteristics of this down to tritype but this is me. I feel dissimilar from a lot of INFPs in this sense. Generally I don't bottle up rage, I try to avoid conflict certainly, I will always let things slide for a while, but if I have a problem with someone I let them know. Most of the time though, it has to be said, I let things slide. It may or may not be externally observable that I'm pissed about it.

The only truly enraged anger I can imagine is the kind that would be incited if someone hurt someone I care about. That's the kind of anger where I could see myself physically hurting someone...even then I don't see myself getting hysterical or beyond my own control. It's not that my self-control is that amazing, it's just that I am a very detached person at almost all times, it seems to come naturally to me. I think the difference there apart from the level of seriousness and my response to it, is that it's a more...idk. 'Hot' anger? A more all-out anger, where I'm not trying to leave them guessing anymore, I want them to know I want to fuck them up. Something like that. To be fair I may well lose control at some point, but, thankfully nothing has happened to make me that angry so far in my life.
I should point out I have very little experience with the latter kind of angry and don't get angry much generally.
 
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