Keep in mind I've tested INTJ: INTP: INFP: INFJ, Socionics INTp, and Enneagram 5w4; 4w5; and 5w6.From an INFP perspective, could you guys talk a bit about what problems, specifically you have in forum communities and what you do to solve them? If you don't know how to solve them, could you share some of the things you encounter so that another INFP can help?
Here are some of mine:
1. Sometimes people want to tell me they know more about a subject than I do. Usually this is completely off topic. I'm trying to talk to the OP or expand on the OP's ideas, and someone comes along and says I'm wrong.
I'm decent at handling this situation. Usually I bow out of the conversation. However, sometimes, this baits me into wanting to either explain what I meant or to demonstrate that I do know what I'm talking about. What are some tips to handle this situation and how would you, as an INFP, handle this situation?
2. When should someone report a post? I don't mean just according to forum rules, but at what point do you, personally, as an INFP, discern that a post should be reported?
I have only reported one post here due to suicidal ideation. Perhaps it's a compulsion, because I'm a mandated reporter for my job, but I felt that reporting it would at least alert mods who did know what to do in those situations to respond.
3. Sometimes someone deliberately misunderstands me just to sort of bully me into allowing them to express an opinion. I get to the point where I know they're no longer interested in talking to me, but are, instead, just using me as a way to drive a point home. This is the sort of thing on the forum I dislike the most.
Usually I either point it out and ask that if the person is really interested in furthering the conversation, to PM me. OR I PM them first and say that if they're really interested in having this conversation, let's take it to PMs so that the thread won't be derailed. What are ways you would handle this problem?
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Basically, I'm looking to identify common problems or challenges INFPs have on forums and generate some ideas on what are the best ways to respond to these problems. If you have one that I haven't mentioned, please share and we can come up with some ideas on the best way to handle this.
Also, I've got a long history with Internet forums, going back to 1995 or so, perhaps a bit sooner--and a lot of the issues are the same , i.e. I ran into problems you detailed long before I got into personality typing according to MBTI, Socionics, Enneagram.
And I was a mod on some of the forums.
One problem I wanted to mention before I forget it that you didn't list but may have had a problem with is being followed around and poked at.
For example, on the previous forum I belonged to for many years, more than one, usually a newbie, would start following me around and saying foolishly insulting things, e.g. if I had a bird avatar, the person would show up and write "Squawk squawk!" or knowing I had rescued cats, in an opinion thread call me The Crazy Cat Lady.
I can't say the next example is worse because it happened less than the constant, "Squawk squawk" bit, but the ones who would seem to look for my posts, then come in and challenge me. I think you mentioned something like that.
These persons were known for being what one of my grandparents called "ill-natured" and others have various terms for. I wouldn't back down; I wouldn't "take the bait," but I also wouldn't engage beyond sticking to the thread topic and my opinion, then I would Unsubscribe. It was too much like playground bully behavior, and I couldn't walk away so easily back then. It's not worth my energy to engage someone who is spoiling for a fight--and for some reason liked to target me.
I haven't got that here (yet?)
As for reporting, hitting that button, wow, I hardly ever have--and maybe I should have, but one thing? On the previous forum, a lot I thought crossed obvious lines didn't seem to bother mods whereas other behavior I thought was fine for a diverse group did. That, and I grew up with this code: Narcs were seen as the worst kind of people, and I absorbed that message, i.e. don't be a cry baby: deal with it or walk away.
From the first forums I belonged to up till recently, I'd say the rare times I hit Report was for porno spamming and similar disruptive posting.
It's more of a problem now than it was when I first belonged to Internet forums and moderated a couple. We had a saying, "Take it to email" and that worked most of the time. When it didn't work out, we mods talked about it in private, and the founder would issue a ban for the trouble-makers because the boards I belonged to had one focal point easier to pinpoint, e.g. Depression. Anyone being obviously rude, hurtful, judgmental got a warning.
Another I belonged to was a literary review with various sections, more complicated, and I was on staff but only did substitute modding to give someone a night off.
Back to how complicated it's gotten, and what to do: Walk away if the person isn't breaking a rule that can be reported--either before or after making your final point (some of us need to; for others, it isn't worth it--or the topic doesn't warrant the effort).
Looking back at how I put up with being followed by a couple of people? I'd handle it differently now. Back then I ignored and never reciprocated in their childish manner, thinking they'd catch on, but they didn't, so now I would send a PM asking them to stop it. And if that didn't work, then I would PM a mod--if that is the right way to do it.
In fact, nice you brought this up @brightflashes - Does anyone know the link or procedure for doing what we called "back-channeling" a mod to look at a particular member who is spamming or consistently following us around, et cetera?
With my memory problems, it's hard for me to know how to handle or suggest another person handle some of the examples. And it's changed, as I indicated: Used to be easy, often, as just saying, "Take it to email" so the equivalent for two hijacking a thread would be "Take it to PM"...
or as a comedienne once said in a routine for last call at a bar, "You don't have to go home but you can't stay here."
Forgive the rambling; I'm having a rough ride, today.