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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Don't get me wrong, I love my fellow INFPs! However, there are times where I utterly despise some of my INFP friends.
I can't tell whether or not it's because they're unhealthy/underdeveloped, enneagram, or just plain individual character flaws.

My best friend is an INFP and we get along great. No fights or miscommunications and he never annoys me. He's probably the more normal and most stable INFP I know.

Other INFPs on the other hand... I noticed some thirst for attention and if you do not say or do what they want, they will feel hurt and start critizing how you don't care about their feelings.
One guy ranted to me about how he's tired of seeing everyone (including me) getting into relationships while he has been single for a year. When I told him about my new relationship, he said that he's happy but also apologized for ignoring the whole thing because he's not in the mood to talk about me. He always turns the conversation back on himself and his problems and his wants and needs and ahhhhh. He got mad at me because he told me that all he wanted to do was not settle and find a pretty, thin but curvy gf. I said his standards are quite high considering his situation, but if he wants that, ok, do it. He gets mad because I don't give him my opinion. But I just did! Like, if that's what you want, then do it. I don't know what more to say. This whole interaction is just annoying. It's like he wants a more specific answer to validate his statements. There are many times I wish to just drop these kinds of people but I don't because I don't want to hurt them and there are times when we do get along. Overly sensitive INFPs just get to me, I guess.

Another INFP guy friend of mine is super nice and cuddly and cute... but his sensitivity or mannerisms get to me little by little to the point where I am just annoyed or repulsed by his presence. Very opinionated, inconsiderate at times, and highly sensitive... I can only handle him in small doses. But then I feel horrible for being so annoyed because he's so nice to me! It's such a love hate relationship...

There are also INFPs who want to be so individualistic or are so self-centered that if you take the spotlight from them, they will hate you and no longer want to associate because they think they're better than you. I remember having an artist friend of mine introducing me to the game League of Legends. I picked it up quite fast and was a better player than her in no time. She started to resent playing with me, even though I would carry her in games. She unfollowed me and no longer kept in close contact. She's a great artist, and whenever I try to reconnect or give her some advice for future art career goals, she says her thanks but eventually just pushes me aside. I know she thinks I am no longer worth her time and that's how I started realizing that maybe that's how other INFPs just feel around each other.

So, do you guys dislike other INFPs sometimes? Do you think it has anything to do with enneagram/other underlying personality theories or just plain ole immaturity?
 

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Dunno many INFPs. A few I met online via League actually (lol) were pretty sensitive to sarcasm and whatnot. They listen well though.

All personality theories are insightful and should be used together to get closer to a total model. But in terms of behavior in real time, that's too hard to guess. Gotta know the person well.

Usually its immaturity, insecurity, or whatever other thing it usually is.
 

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Hate is a strong word, so I can't say I feel hate, but let's say I feel strong dislike to the point I can't be in the same space with them, and by space I mean facebook groups. The INFPs on PerC are generally easy to get along with. Big difference with the ones in fb groups. I had to eventually leave the groups because I couldn't stand them anymore. Too much crying, whining, immaturity of extraordinary levels, and a lack of critical thinking, amongst other things.
My brain says that people only show one side of themselves online, and that the whole person happens behind the scenes, so I'm not judging their entire persona as if I know them, I'm judging the face that they choose to put forth over there, and they are like energy vampires. Every little conversation you try to have with these people makes you feel depressed and in a fog, wondering what the hell happened, cause just 5 minutes ago you were in such a good mood, and all of a sudden it's gone. Energy vampires, I swear.

I can't speak of in-real-life INFPs, cause I know none currently.

Another INFP guy friend of mine is super nice and cuddly and cute... but his sensitivity or mannerisms get to me little by little to the point where I am just annoyed or repulsed by his presence.
This too. Same.
It's like I can't do extremes. I can't do the nonstop cryers, and can't do the nonstop cotton candy with those big explosions of supposed love that makes absolutely no sense to me. My mind feels better with a balance. I'm always looking for a peaceful state of being, and people usually disrupt my peace LOL and INFPs are people, so... yeah xD
 

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can't say that i hate anyone in particular, but there are some attitudes coming from some (people i believe to be) INFPs that i find really disgusting (and we all know how stubborn IxxPs can be about some of their convictions).

i'm very against the idea of relating individual flaws (or just attitudes i dislike) to a type, specially since i know how easy it is for most people to label the whole from the one "all INFPs are special snowflakes who cry all the time and will kill themselves before turning 30" even if this probably only happens to a minority of us (i know many people use stereotypes as jokes, but, unfortunately, some actually take them seriously)

i'm just ranting now, i don't even think my rant is that coherent. sorry for spilling my thoughts over the keyboard and making a mess :(
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I just want to clarify that when I say hate I do not mean pure hatred but a strong dislike. I just added the word hate for a more striking title, I guess... lol. I agree with all you're saying! One moment all is fine and dandy until some small thing happens where now they're all insecure and depressing and you're totally drained.
:exterminate:
 

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I would probably be annoyed with hanging out with those people if I were in your position but most of the INFP's I've met, either online or in real life have been pretty cool people. Actually I would just say you've had an extraordinary amount of bad luck in getting 3 different annoying people to annoy you. That's almost impressive, maybe a record. Weirdly enough I'm now wondering what it must be like to meet such an annoying INFP, on second thoughts, maybe it's better if I just imagine xD
 

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For better or for worse people are people and it can really suck at times though it still amazes me how people can go crazy if they are without a partner for too long. My advice is already in your own post that being only take people in small doses that you are happy with and manage when it is anything more. What passes for normal these days and worse are often basket cases so good luck.
 

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Humans dislike other humans all the time, what's your point. Don't try to make this some special 'case' by involving myers-briggs...it's pretty ridiculous :rolleyes:
 

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I used to think that INFP's can't be narcissists, only co-dependent. When I found an INFP narcissist it was clear that it looked the same. It has to do with extreme EXTRINSIC MOTIVATION. No ability to self-soothe and no internal parent.

Personality disorder goes deeper than MBTI.
 

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I can't think of any INFPs I hate on PerCafe, and I'm a bit happy that I am not arguing or in a fight on the internet with anyone. It's a great relief and things have been kind of weird lately with the elections so close. I think people are on edge.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Yeah, I noticed that the people I dislike or are the most unhealthy are always extrinsically motivated. They can't find fulfillment within themselves. However, when people do start living and learning with intrinsic motivation, they become happier and healthier. The reason I made it an INFP question is not because I think all INFPs are bad and are the only type to annoy me. It's because there are different ways people can get on each others nerves and I want to understand if there are reasons why or what the cause is by adding some theory to it... cause why not?
 

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@entheos

About the MBTI Facebook groups... Those groups are so annoying. Especially the INFP and INFJ groups. The big INFP is full of mostly non-INFPs and trolls, same with INFJ. I don't mind other types being in other groups but the amount of trolls and insensitive things on the groups is ridiculous.
 

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Hate is a strong word, but in general something I don't like about INFPs is that a lot of us tend to take ourselves way too seriously. That is a dirty thing to me. I feel that if you can't laugh at yourself, then who can you laugh at? I don't know. I try to lighten things up every now and then around here, but it's not always positively received. I'll keep trying though I suppose.
 

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Usually can't stand other INFPs that follow along these lines:

a. Not "interesting" enough. You're nice, but...I think watching a video on an ESTJ explaining ESTJ might be more interesting (btw in case you're wondering...it's not). Basically you're just not for me, sugar.

b. Too many similarities without much difference.

c. Conflict-avoidant or harmonious type TO THE MAX. I'm talking neoliberal kumbaya INFPs that go berserk if you threaten the utopia they've created.

d. Extremists. Basically extremists.

e. Moral pricks. What do I mean? You ever felt policed by someone who claimed authority over how you should behave and talk? Yeah, me too, and trust me it's more hurtful coming from an INFP bc they're supposed to be understanding of how they're them and you're you. Who look down on anyone who doesn't conform to their principles.

I'm talking people who ask open questions knowing it'll attract the opposite opinion so they can swoop down and condemn those answers and "correct" them with their superior opinion. I'm talking people who won't take responsibility in the sense of admitting that their actions may be wrong, instead hold their chin high. I'm talking people who criticize other opinions without considering the cons of said opposing opinions. Who have no compassion for those with whom they're in disagreement and even wish them dead. Yep, kids, these exist and no one likes dealing with them on platforms where intellectual and ideological diversity is encouraged.

f. Basically extremists.

g. Excessive pride. Self-love and the expression of it are welcomed. Dignity, you go for it. Yes to great self-esteem. Accomplishments? You go, dude! But I think it's pretty universally understood what I mean by "excessive pride."

Just to be clear, I get what you mean but so I don't get flamed for not saying it: NO I don't hate INFPs. I never really hated....anything...really..hm.

Except this guy. Fock this guy. I love him he's great but FOCK HIM.



 

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Everyone is different. I don't know any INFP's in real-life. At least none of them are my friends. I think they wouldn't like me though, cause i come more across of a INTP.

If people hate me, i'm sorry... I know i have my flaws, that i'm not perfect... and that i should be able to post a bit better at times...
 

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@entheos

About the MBTI Facebook groups... Those groups are so annoying. Especially the INFP and INFJ groups. The big INFP is full of mostly non-INFPs and trolls, same with INFJ. I don't mind other types being in other groups but the amount of trolls and insensitive things on the groups is ridiculous.
LOL I've been in one of them... I left them very quickly... They were so hostile... I hated those groups... I did left them... I don't like those groups.

Even the INFP public fb pages are so... yeah... Everyone is so clichè. Everyone hears one movie: AMELIE and they all jump on it... YES WE ALL LOVE AMELIE. It's so annoying... They all apparently cry... They all are SO INFP'ish that an INFP can't be different anymore on ONE THING?
 

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LOL I've been in one of them... I left them very quickly... They were so hostile... I hated those groups... I did left them... I don't like those groups.

Even the INFP public fb pages are so... yeah... Everyone is so clichè. Everyone hears one movie: AMELIE and they all jump on it... YES WE ALL LOVE AMELIE. It's so annoying... They all apparently cry... They all are SO INFP'ish that an INFP can't be different anymore on ONE THING?
I actually love Amelie so much hahaha. But I totally agree, left those pages super quickly too...so annoying lol
 

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I actually love Amelie so much hahaha. But I totally agree, left those pages super quickly too...so annoying lol
So many INFP's have left, and no INFP's are left over anymore!!! :laughing:

The most un-INFP'ish INFP group i've ever known. Invaded by other types and the INFP's left over were purged!!!
 
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