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what is your experience with/perception of isfps? i have known one for a while, but i'm not sure what to think of him. the S/N difference definitely seems to create a barrier, at least from my viewpoint. it doesn't seem to for him. but i find that he never wants to tread too deep in discussions, emotionally speaking, and that bothers me. any time i start talking about something with intense or negative emotional connotations, he just changes the subject or makes some kind of attempt at humor. has anyone else had this experience with isfps?
 

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My best friend and cousin are both ISFPs and I consider them brothers. You're certainly correct in that they generally avoid talking about important topics (well, I'm the same too, but ISFPs seem even more-so that way). It helps if you talk directly and let them know what you want, but it's rather important that they gain a sense of familiarity with someone before they will open up to anything truly important to them. Additionally, you absolutely must appear genuine and trustworthy in their eyes, and they must see a reason or benefit in order to voice their opinion on the matter. ISFPs value independence very much as well and generally see expressing negativity for no reason other than to vent as a needless burden upon others.

But yes, the S/N difference will, at times, alienate the both of us, but because we both share a dominant Fi function, we still usually feel a deep, noncommunicable sort of connection, so I find that we can still feel where the other is coming from.
 

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I've been in a romantic relationship before with an ISFP, and as an INFP it's generally pretty great. ISFPs seem much better at enjoying and living in the moment than we INFPs are. On the other hand, they don't have the same need to "go deep" when discussing and exploring ideas and subtleties of the relationship. The ISFP I was in a relationship with also wasn't as good at stepping back and analyzing his emotions in the moment. That meant I sometimes had to work through fits of paranoia and upset on his part, without him helping that much in the process (even though later on he'd apologize).

That being said, I think ISFPs are pretty awesome and have a lot to teach us INFPs. Definitely a lot of unspoken understanding there, and a similar ability to be true to oneself and only express what is deeply felt.
 

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I am just beginning to embark on a deeper friendship with an ISFP who I have known for 3 years. She is extremely authentic yet extremely guarded. I have tremendous respect for the way she acts exactly in accordance with how she feels, rather than how she thinks others expect her to act. I had to expressly ask her if she would like our friendship to be deeper or to stay on the level it was (which was a nice, friendly, surface relationship with mutual respect), as I was extremely aware of stepping on her personal boundaries. We are getting to be friendlier, but she is still fairly guarded in letting out her inner feelings and values, as if she doesn't want to impose them on me unless I ask. If I don't ask then I will just tell her my life and end up knowing nothing much of hers.
 

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I will join in the fun by saying the same thing everyone else is... lol

ISFP. not so hot on the deep end of things but I found actually laughing at my deep side sometimes helps me a bit. the deep end of our personalities is very dark sometimes and a little warm laughter can help.

watch out though for bitter ISFP's

and I noticed that the introverted feeling doesn't work to well when both parties are stuck in their own and can't save the other...
but I believe ISFP's are just as sensitive as we are... but have a possibly even harder time communicating that sensitivity.

(laughing)
I just remembered... I was talking to my friend about the whole concept of reality and what isn't real in terms of relationships, but I was using tons of metaphors and such... later she says that she had no clue what I was talking about but she listened cause she could tell it was important to me.
I do love when she pokes fun at me though. it makes me feel although misunderstood... kind of accepted. :)
I don't think anyone cares more about their friends than introverted feelers.

although no Ne ISFP's are amazing and our cousins sorta... back in the Jung only days. lol.
 

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I have a very good friend who is ISFP.

but he's not that genuine when it comes to compliments, and it's almost as if he's placing other people above himself when it comes to anything just so people can say "no nooo thats not true".
 
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Hey!
I'm an ISFP and one of my best friends is an INFJ, she's very beautiful, very polite, very poetic and dreamy.

I also appreciate poetry, as well as music and all other things that i consider beautiful (including nature :proud:, human beings - some have such a beautiful soul ) But there are, of course, some differences between me and my friend regarding the use of our primary functions. Growing up, i learned to temper my Fi and be a little more reasonable, and in spite of the dreamy mood that i plunge in due to all the beautiful things i admire, i'm still a realistic person and i feel rather bad when she imagines all sorts of scenarios, i listen to her and i say to myself "no, that's not going to happen soon".
My Ni function is quite developed, but, of course, not as much as hers and not to mention that my Fe function is generally "asleep" :sad: while hers is so well developed.
I love exchanging ideas. On several occasions, i tried to talk to her about deep and philosophical things, but she would be quite reluctant and she would elegantly change the subject.

And about INFPs... i recognize them instantly and i feel very attracted to them, i always start a conversation and befriend quickly with Idealists. They're absolutely adorable.
 

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I think both my mom and brother are ISFPs, and it's kinda weird because we do clash a lot, but we have a lot of the same sorts of principles that make up our moral foundation. The clash is usually something to do with aesthetics (which is superficial and meaningless to me most of the time). They do seem to be hesitant to talk very deeply about most things, especially introspective things. It's like, they always feel a need to put on this act that everything is fine, when I know they're not and I want to help them work things out or whatever. They tend to have negative phases/moods longer than I do because they try to avoid confronting them and especially doing so in public.
 

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Do INFP's open up easily you say, and like to talk about emotions? I am a person who constantly change subject, or make a joke instead, when eg. my sister want to talk about emotions (which often give me negative vibes). Maybe I mistyped myself then :frustrating:
 

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Do INFP's open up easily you say, and like to talk about emotions? I am a person who constantly change subject, or make a joke instead, when eg. my sister want to talk about emotions (which often give me negative vibes). Maybe I mistyped myself then :frustrating:
I'm not really sure about this. Although I am very introverted in many ways, I'm also really open with my feelings. I have always felt that it was better to get the feelings in the open rather than dealing with ongoing tention - if there's a relational issue. And I've always just expressed my feelings about just about anything to whoever I'm close to....often quite dramatically. I don't know how typical it is for INFPs to keep their feelings to themselves......for me that doesn't seem natural. I don't know.
 

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what is your experience with/perception of isfps? i have known one for a while, but i'm not sure what to think of him. the S/N difference definitely seems to create a barrier, at least from my viewpoint. it doesn't seem to for him. but i find that he never wants to tread too deep in discussions, emotionally speaking, and that bothers me. any time i start talking about something with intense or negative emotional connotations, he just changes the subject or makes some kind of attempt at humor. has anyone else had this experience with isfps?
Hmm....my husband is an ISFP and I think I'd have to agree with what most everyone is saying. We are alike in so many ways, and share a deep connection. We seem to have the same sense of humor. He is always kind and sweet and thinks about how I feel. He tends to go for actions more often than words when he's showing his care for me, and sometimes it seems like putting what he thinks about me into words is a little awkward. But then the other day he amazed me and told me all these specific things he appreciates and admires in me and how he feels they affect him for the better - it was so sweet and wonderfull to hear! I suppose most of the time he seems more like the "strong silent" type, although you can definately tell he has a soft heart. He is very easy going and laid back and doesn't seem to get upset by much, just takes everything in stride. I really appreciate that.

- We do have deep conversations, but often not as deep or as long as with my NF and NT friends. It seems more like if I initiate the conversation he'll get interested, but I do more of the talking and theorizing. Sometimes he doesn't quite follow me. But then I can also say that I don't always quite follow him. He has an interest in metaphysics and what people might think of as typicaly N-like topics, and has done a fair bit of reading, he just doesn't talk about those things as much. More often he tells stories about things that happend or explains how something is constructed or the best process for doing something - which isn't always as fascinating to me - so I guess we're pretty even in that regard.

- I seem to be a lot more inclined towards thinking and writing - not terribly active, whereas he is always busy making things and doing things.

- He tends to like novel experiences more than I do as well, and is sometimes disappointed when I decide before trying something that I'm not going to like it (intuition here! it serves me well).

- He doesn't always know how to respond to my negative emotions, but he's usually just quiet and listens and tries to be supportive. I always feel sure of his loyalty and love even when we don't see eye to eye. I've never had him change the subject on me with feelings, he just doesn't discuss them a lot - does a lot more listening.

- It often seems like he keeps a lot of his feelings to himself. He will express excitment openly as well as frustration. But when he's sad or worried he tends to just go silent. I have to ask him if something is wrong, and he usually tells me very concisely, doesn't elaborate much. Then he just needs me to be close and let him stare at the carpet or cry. He doesn't seem to need or want to talk it through a lot like I do. The feelings seem a lot less connected to words in his head somehow I guess.
 

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He has an interest in metaphysics and what people might think of as typicaly N-like topics, and has done a fair bit of reading, he just doesn't talk about those things as much. More often he tells stories about things that happend or explains how something is constructed or the best process for doing something
Thanks for sharing! So often I feel that ISFPs are pinned as people having no interest in theory, but it is interesting in terms of it's application or if it makes you think differently (i.e., if it changes your process/way of thinking). My obsession with process and context is a need in terms of my learning and it is something I have had to fight for in my higher education. Now I am creating my own curriculum at a progressive school and it is easier.
 

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Do INFP's open up easily you say, and like to talk about emotions? I am a person who constantly change subject, or make a joke instead, when eg. my sister want to talk about emotions (which often give me negative vibes). Maybe I mistyped myself then :frustrating:
No, I don't think so. I'm INFP and I get that way too. I think it's because INFPs are private and are introverted feelers. Although sometimes I wish I talked about stuff like that more.
 

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I met an ISFP, she was extremely snobby/elitist and had a massive ego.

Pissed me off to no end.
 

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I don't know where this lack of depth that's perceived in ISFPs is coming from. I am always the one person in the room that's trying to take things deeper. I guess it depends what you define as deep, though. Sometimes, I have a tendency to avoid telling someone how I really feel about them, and I admit, I do try to keep things light around my parents, but that's just because we clash on everything once you go below surface level. It seems like people think that relationship talk is "deep", and sometimes it is, but "deep" is so much more than that. To me, deep is thinking thoroughly about everything you do and and believe and trying to understand existence and interactions for what they really are. And when You get into that, it tends to scare most people off, regardless of type.

I met an ISFP, she was extremely snobby/elitist and had a massive ego.

Pissed me off to no end.
Sounds like immature Fi to me.
 

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I don't think this was a trait with regards to all ISFP, but the one I dated briefly was boring. We did relate though. I moved on when it was time.
 

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I don't know where this lack of depth that's perceived in ISFPs is coming from. I am always the one person in the room that's trying to take things deeper. I guess it depends what you define as deep, though. Sometimes, I have a tendency to avoid telling someone how I really feel about them, and I admit, I do try to keep things light around my parents, but that's just because we clash on everything once you go below surface level. It seems like people think that relationship talk is "deep", and sometimes it is, but "deep" is so much more than that. To me, deep is thinking thoroughly about everything you do and and believe and trying to understand existence and interactions for what they really are. And when You get into that, it tends to scare most people off, regardless of type.



Sounds like immature Fi to me.
I actually prefer deep and meaningfuls, but most people that I've met aren't into that sort of thing, and thanks, I still don't understand functions that well. >.>
 

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Hmmmmmmm.
My best friend/partner is an INFP.
We go into deep topics quite a bit.
I also have no problem with him being abstract with me.
Though, sometimes, I have him explain what he just said.

Sometimes I feel like I'm in trouble when he tries to go deep. Very rarely, but, it happens.

I do have a tendency to get uncomfortable if he wants to dive deep into my feelings.
I have an extremely hard time talking about my feelings.
 

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My ex best friend is an ISFP..
We were so close, so inseparable, people would have thought we were twins..
but when you really got to know the two of us, we did not see everything eye to eye..

We are both dreamers, both artists, both loyal, immature, impulsive and unpredictable..
We admired one another a great deal..
but.. the little differences.. those things could be really interesting or really boring, depending on how often they were brought up..

Like for example:
She had to listen to me obsess about certain subjects that she cared NOTHING about.. :(
I had to put up with her amusement with loud, stupid things that loop forever. Like certain Youtube videos.. Dx WHY IS IT STILL FUNNY THE 1000th TIME YOU WATCH IT? AHGGRGGG.

Haha.. but yeh.. from my point of view, our friendship was like Bridge to Terabithia. It was deep, almost loving, and the real world revolved around our world. [Which was awesome because we are both artists and writers and love anime and dark stuff. :D]
 
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