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I saw a thread about INFPs and casual sex which made me laugh.
Tis has never interested me.
I won't lie, several girls have said they found me good looking and I've had several approaches, but I always turned it away (although my penis would hate me for it about 30 mins later).

I just am not interested in sleeping wi someone who I don't find special. And yeah, I imagine you xxTJ bastards will say "that's virgin talk right there" but it's true.
 

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I'm selective in the sense that I'm only interested in being with women I have a strong emotional connection with, at least deep like if not love. But not in the sense that theres a particular type of woman I seek out, I don't care about hair color, ethnicity, shape, stuff like that, and I've found a connection with a variety of women of different appearances and backgrounds. But yes I'm selective, I don't open up to people easily or quickly.
 

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I don't have anything against casual sex per se. I mean, I don't want to have sex with someone I dislike, but it's easy for me to find something to like in most people... It's just not something that's likely to happen with my lifestyle and personality. I stay at home a lot, am rather reserved and prefer to observe and get comfortable in an environment before I start actively socializing.

Damn my stupid slowpoke charm... it's very effective, but it takes way too long and at that point a no strings attached type thing becomes difficult, and I really don't want to get too involved with most women. I don't need a whole bunch of new expectations and responsibilities in my life, but sadly that usually seems to come with the territory.

I'm not too picky in the looks department, but yeah I'm definitely selective when it comes to my freedom. I'll take no less than a woman who accepts me as I am, won't try to change me, doesn't constantly want to go out and do stuff that only costs money but is boring as fuck, and won't get on my tits for the way I choose to lead my life.

In summary, I'm looking for a woman who will leave me alone. Feel free to send applications via PM :^)
 

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hmm i would definitely never turn down anyone who approached me now, so long as it was seen as nothing serious by both parties.

in terms of who i would approach, most of the time i have 1 or 2 crushes, and other people who i have some level of heart feeling for. buttt, i don't know what i can say to them in order to get to know them better, in my head they will see through anything i say and just see that i want to sleep with them, even though that isn't the most important thing to me.

ideally, i want to meet someone who shares my interest and some level of experience in spirituality, its all that i have left right now, so it would be important for me to be able to share that part of myself. i also frequent a drug harm reduction forum, and there was a thread on what a dealbreaker would be for girls in terms of dating someone. the consensus was that if you don't have a job, don't study and live at home, thats a dealbreaker for most. i have no job, i study but i do no work which leaves me in a perpetual state of catastrophic despair, and i live at home with my fundamentalist catholic parents. soooo even though i would date myself, MOST people wouldn't i guess.

oh and there was one time that i felt a next level feeling of love for someone, and it took me like 2 or 3 years to tell them how i felt. then i realised how bad we would be for eachother in a relationship anyway, i think a part of me recognised how similar our suffering was when i first fell for her, but we grew in different directions in those years that passed..
 

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It's pretty much the same for me. When it comes to a specific type then I have to admit that there is a one for me. Generally I'm looking for authenticity in the people I spend time with. This applies also to women, and there are some stereotype-superficial-indicators I take into account.
 

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I like to think that I'd be all good for a casual hookup but when the opportunity presents itself, I can't bring myself to do it. I'd rather just go masturbate, to be honest, than to feel so much pressure to please this girl I am unfamiliar with sexually and then have little intimacy after. It just doesn't work for me. I have a high sex drive but I also have a very strong desire for intimacy and to please. I'd rather not have the pressure of just hoping what I do is good and not learning from experience. Plus, condoms suck. And now I'm really really sad because I just got out of a long term relationship today and who the fuck knows when the next time I'll have sex is... And possible more importantly the next time I'll be able to just lay down and hold a girl close to me, feeling some kind of bond. And fuck, now I'm crying again.
 

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Not so much when it comes to physical features (although I'll probably not have much interest in a girl I don't find attractive on some level), but when it comes to who she is as a person, the details can matter A LOT. Recently I had to let go of an attachment I had with a girl I met online. We were both interested in one another, but apart from the (for us) insurmountable issue of distance, I discovered that there was a level that we just couldn't connect on, and though we got along really well, I didn't feel as if she could fully relate to and respond to the thoughts that came from the more deeply personal and integral parts of my mind and my heart, and likewise, I couldn't fully comprehend or respond to hers.

I've also found myself quickly turned off from girls I've found very physically attractive but very unattractive in personality. Looks matter some, but personality, heart, and compatibility (as it relates to communication and intimacy of any kind) is far, far more important to me, and it's something that seems to be very difficult to find. At least at 18. Hopefully it gets easier, or maybe I'm just looking in all the wrong places, but...dunno.

So in short, yes. We are (or I am, at least) very selective.
 

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I've never liked the idea of casual sex personally, or swing(ers). To each their own though... But a close friend of mine and his wife were swingers... were! Because now they're divorced and it was cause she fell for someone else they'd been 'swinging' with #Rekt lol

I've had a one night stand, and felt horrible about it not because the reason you may think initially. I was super lonely and got to the ah fuck-it point of my life and had a one night stand with someone I was 'marginally attracted to' in every sense. It was a co-worker of mine at the time that didn't bother me either they were a cool enough person *so I thought* that it probably wouldn't get weird because I was in no way looking to be in a relationship with them. Okay, getting to my point now sorry, Did our thing, it was horrible btw then she actually would not leave me a lone! I didn't know what to do so I just asked her friends what the hell was going on...Come to find out this girl was married... and guess what, her husband was overseas in Iraq. I felt like the scum of the earth for so long after that, but to my defense I honestly didn't know. So even though I hated the idea to begin with and did it anyway that shit blew up right in my face and tortured me for a long time. Even thinking about it makes me wanna hate myself again. So yeah I def don't recommend the casual sex thing it NEVER works out well.

Every other girl I've been with I was dating and were dating for a long time before we ever had sex, never shoulda strayed from 'my way' that is basically what you said. So, I'm right there with ya and letting you know from experience that casual sex is a bust and can lead to some serious dark stuff especially for and Fi dominant.
 

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Selective? Love isn't exactly a chosen process. You like who you like and everything else is just self-deception.

And if you're selective about casual sex, you really ought to ask yourself why. Do you seriously need a system to know who you want to sleep with?
 
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I personally am, but my infp friend will usually try if your half decent and if it doesnt work shel just stop and tell you shes pretty honest
 

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Selective? Love isn't exactly a chosen process. You like who you like and everything else is just self-deception.

And if you're selective about casual sex, you really ought to ask yourself why. Do you seriously need a system to know who you want to sleep with?
Touche'!!!!!! I totally ignored that part of his statement and went off on some shpeal about my sexcapades. Yeah, no I just went with my gut initially with the people I dated throughout life, they all went terribly hmmm. lol Till I grew up a bit and was honest about what I'd want in a person!
 
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