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Hi folks
Got diagnosed with MS today. As an Intj for the first time in my life I have no plan or idea what to do next. Getting married was hard enough at 33 now this happens. Apart from emotional support which I got enough already from a friend ( not that we needed it that much any way ^_^ ) , what do you guys suggest. Cause my center of command ( brain / logic) is in chaos and not functioning as it should. So I am calling my fellow like minded to help. Ty ^_^
 

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Hi folks
Got diagnosed with MS today. As an Intj for the first time in my life I have no plan or idea what to do next. Getting married was hard enough at 33 now this happens. Apart from emotional support which I got enough already from a friend ( not that we needed it that much any way ^_^ ) , what do you guys suggest. Cause my center of command ( brain / logic) is in chaos and not functioning as it should. So I am calling my fellow like minded to help. Ty ^_^
Research. Learn that disease inside and out. My brother-in-law (an ISFJ, I think) has had MS for years and he functions very well. He and my sister put a lot of energy into understanding MS, and used that knowledge to adapt. He is an active guy, really loves hunting, skiing, biking, and lots of outdoor sports. Of course MS changed his life some, but he still does all of those things - he knows how to manage his life to minimize the outbreaks.
 

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Jaffa Master
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Hi folks
Got diagnosed with MS today. As an Intj for the first time in my life I have no plan or idea what to do next. Getting married was hard enough at 33 now this happens. Apart from emotional support which I got enough already from a friend ( not that we needed it that much any way ^_^ ) , what do you guys suggest. Cause my center of command ( brain / logic) is in chaos and not functioning as it should. So I am calling my fellow like minded to help. Ty ^_^
What @Green Girl said.

Learning about it, finding other people with MS and seeing how they've adapted. Take bits and pieces of what they say and form your own adaptive strategy.
 

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Spam-I-am
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i'm sorry to hear that
the worst part is not knowing what to expect
i'm going through severe health issues myself and am not too worried about it
my options are limited to 2
1-die
2-not die
worrying about it does no good and accomplish's nothing
try support groups
the people there have more experience and are more qualified to help guide you
god bless and in the immortal words of leonard nimoy ''live long and prosper''

ask @Swede she's a pharmer and might know of some future treatment with positive results
can ya help a brother in need swede
hey that rhymes
i should be one of them poets
 

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Allow yourself to grieve, allow yourself to have bad days. Realize that they are normal, take a deep breath and find something that brings joy to your life.

Realizing that is it OK to have meltdowns kept me from going insane when I had a major health issue. Allow those around you to support you. Ask for help if you need it.
 

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1. You're the exact same person you always were--it's just that now you have more information about yourself.
2. I have watched youtube videos from people who have MS talk about their MS and the general consensus seems to be that losing weight has significantly reduced their symptoms if not completely removed them.
 

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MOTM May 2014
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I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I am pretty sure that there are not a whole lot of things I could say that would make anything better at this stage.

However, some of this might get useful after you get over the initial shock. Some of this has already been touched upon, but these are the few main things that struck me when I read your post.

- Look into the different stages of grief and accept the way you are reacting to and will react to your diagnosis and your disease. You might not follow the cycle to a T and you will likely go through more than one cycle, depending on how your MS progresses. It is all right to be pissed off, it is all right to get depressed - what you are going through it incredibly hard and unfair.
If you accept your own reactions, I think that you will get to a stage of acceptance faster.

- Don't fall into the hype that INTJs don't need "much support" (even though I am not sure whether you were joking or not).
Of course we need support, just as any other human being would in your situation.
We do however have difficulties asking for help and support. We have a hard time leaning against others and becoming dependent. We don't like being 'clingy', 'dramatic', 'egotistic' - but this can become exaggerated to a point where we disregard our needs completely because we feel like we should be able to handle everything on our own.
I think that what we prefer is not always what we need and I think that this is part of the INTJ acceptance of grief too; the courage to allow ourselves to accept 'weakness', which in many ways becomes a strength. I am glad to hear that you have someone there - I think that this is one of the key elements to emotional and by proxy also physical health.
A trick that may help; if one of your friends got the same diagnosis that you just got, what emotional and time 'limits' would you put on your friend's reactions? Be as understanding and loyal to yourself as you would to a friend.

- Allow yourself to listen more carefully to your body (as well as your mind). I have a feeling that being a man and an INTJ, you probably naturally disregard your body's signals (and your emotions). I am saying this because INTJs often align with stereotypical masculinity, which includes being so strong that it becomes a weakness - this is the reason why men often wait for too long before seeking medical help and why suicide rate is so much higher for men than for women.

- Don't limit yourself, don't stick to the tried path only. If you are determined to increase your chances of relative health, do your own thing as well as what your doctor/s recommend/s.
I went through some health related struggles for the better part of a decade and I am convinced that part of how my issue was resolved was that I did not only stick to the specialists, but I also started to see a holistic doctor, who helped me tremendously. She picked up on things that no one else would have bothered with and she also did her own research through her network of other less conventional/conservative professionals. Without her, I would never have gotten to where I am.
My specialist thought that she was a charlatan and my husband called her "the witch doctor". I don't really care - the point is, listen to yourself and don't let others tell you what to do and think - this is your life.

- Maybe look into specific support groups/boards for MS? Not necessarily for emotionally support, but I would guess that an online MS board would be the place to hear about the latest findings in regards to MS research and unconventional treatments.

- The advice forum on PerC might be a better place to ask for feedback, since you might reach a broader audience there.
 

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i'd expect a lot of rage. also, intjs under stress tend to start out by trying to understand an issue out of existence - demanding every possible wrinkle and corner and crumb of knowledge and getting infuriated when it fails to be available. immune disorders are an area of medicine that is just fraught with 'well, we just don't know.'

the unpredictability of them is deadly for people like us. a progressive issue that progresses in a linear way might be easier to deal with, because you can at least make a forecast and a plan and structure your life around it. ime, immune disorders punish you for exactly your most trustworthy coping skill because they set you up to keep thinking you've located stability, and then they drop a new curveball on you. so do what you need to and what feels comforting at any one point, but - sorry to instruct you - maybe try to keep yourself in getting so invested in any one pathway or outlook that a setback will ruin you emotionally.

expect people to start imagining they're suddenly qualified to tell you what to think and how to feel and what your outlook should be because you're 'sick' and they're not and that makes them better than you. so you might want to be careful about who you disclose to. and also expect a lot of insensitive anecdotal crap about 'my cousin's sister's dentist had it, and he . . . ' stomp these people. my sister told me that all you have to do is come up with an immune-system disorder and 'every whack job with a crystal and a herb garden' starts leaping tall buildings to come and tell you all about their own personal miracle cure. these people can be told to go fuck themselves too.

idk. honestly, i don't think anyone is entitled to tell you who what where why, but it's a bombshell hearing something like that. i'll cross my fingers for you either way.
 

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Hi folks
Got diagnosed with MS today. As an Intj for the first time in my life I have no plan or idea what to do next. Getting married was hard enough at 33 now this happens. Apart from emotional support which I got enough already from a friend ( not that we needed it that much any way ^_^ ) , what do you guys suggest. Cause my center of command ( brain / logic) is in chaos and not functioning as it should. So I am calling my fellow like minded to help. Ty ^_^
I too was diagnosed with MS in 2013. :(

It is a blow to find out my brain is dying first, it is my Precious. But in the years leading up to the diagnosis, I knew something was wrong with my brain because of how my body worked.

I blame my immune system. It is a powerhouse, I never get sick. And when I do, a normal week long cold is reduced to mere a 2 days. Overzealously, my immune system ventured into unexplored territory (crossed the blood brain barrier) and has had a holy war with my Precious. ;(

At any rate, take care of yourself. Take your meds (I take Avonex injectables). Listen to your body, and do not push yourself past your fatigue point because you might be bent over like an old person without a walker. Trust me, it happened to me and I was so embarrassed. I could not stand up straight until I rested.

Anyway, I am 34 this year. Friend me and ask any questions you need to. :)
 
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