Not diagnostic. I prefer sticking to the walls and observing, too, when I'm among complete strangers and have no one who can introduce me to newer people. And if the newer people don't seem too interested in talking with me (although, that's 8/10 times impossible), I'll prefer observing again.- We recently went to a party. As we entered the place I was talking to everyone, going from one person to another etc. My boyfriend stood closer to walls, observing people and later on finding two people who he spent the evening with, talking etc. The next day he would ask me about who the rest of the guests were etc.
Applies to ENTJs too. We're the least social of extrovert types. Our sociability depends on the people we interact with, not on ourselves. Surrounded by interesting people, we can go on for hours. But with boring, unintelligent, people, we're mute.- He has a very small, tight circle of friends whom he's known for a long time and will not easily bond with new people. If we meet 20 new people at a party, he'll "accept" like two of them. Same thing with my friends.
Talking to new people requires an incentive for ENTJs. If you give me a good reason why I should talk to these people, I will. Otherwise, I'd prefer observing too. Again, not a diagnostic piece of information.- Meeting new people, I'll do the talking, he'll observe.
Same here. And I'm ENTJ. I should reiterate: We don't put any value in socializing; we only put value in the people we socialize with. Tell me to go to an expensive party and I'll reject. But one good friend on my door is an invitation for the whole night out.- He's perfectly happy spending the weekend at home, not going anywhere. Also, after a day at work, a party, any social interaction basically, he needs to be alone and simply won't go out.
Again, sharing requires incentive. If I don't have a good reason, I won't share too. And getting lost in your head? that's quite common. Happens to me too.- He'll think things through in his head and doesn't have a specific need to share them out loud. He also tends to get so lost in his head that he simply won't hear what's going on around him or if someone's talking to him and so on.
It can happen to anyone, really. But as for thinking over something someone dear said, I do that too. It's the Ni curse.- Also, he tends to sort of "pause and reflect" things alone. Sometimes I might tell him/point out something and he won't really answer so I'll just let it be. Then hours/days/weeks later he'll come to me and tell me how he's been thinking about what I said. It still often amazes/impresses me how much he thinks about stuff.
Probably the only piece that gives him away as INTJ.- He doesn't like to be the center of attention or standing in the middle of the room etc.
With that last piece plus all others combined, it's safe to say he's INTJ. But all points, except the last one, considered alone don't really have any diagnostic value in this matter.To wrap things up, my boyfriend is not shy. I'm a rather ambiverted ENFP and need quite a lot of time alone. Still, next to him I often seem like a puppy craving constant attention and company :crazy: So what do you think, does he sound more I to you? Only thing I know for sure is he's just awesome.