I am a lover of ISTJs wondering how I can snag one!!!!! I am an INTJ and I had a huge crush on an ISTJ in high school. I LOVE
-their quiet reservation
and many other things... I know that type isnt everything but this is a type forum so....ISTJs-would you go for an INTJ ?roud:
Interesting combo. I only know one INTJ and we get along great since we are so similar, but we can butt head sometimes because we are both stubborn in our thinking styles. But, I suppose any relationship can work if both individuals are interested in what the other has to offer. My SO is an ISTP and even though the NFP types are supposedly more compatible for ISTJs I get along better with him than I do most NFPs. So, I am learning that compatibility is all about personal preference and if the ISTJ is interested in INTJ qualities, then why couldn't it work out?
It can work, but they are likely to grow apart and end up room mates that happen to be married to each other.
How do you know? Is it because they are so similar? Which type, then, would an ISTJ not grow apart with and end up like roommate? and why is this?
'Cuz I'm old and have been able to know and watch a lot of couples as their relationships progress. How we gather and organize data is our primary difference. If we are at similar levels in our other preferences (IXTJ), then there is not a lot, outside of our shared values and biological differences to hold our interest in the relationship. IMO, the direction of our energy (E vs. I) is a big factor in determining our long term satisfaction with the relationship. Similarly, I believe our outlook on handling of day to day events (P vs. J) is a big indicator of the amount of conflict we can expect to experience in a relationship.
Thank you for sharing your personal wisdom. Can you elaborate on how you mean the direction of our energy determines the satisfaction as well as the P vs. J observation? i.e. Do you mean that if we have to same energies with our cognitive functions? or Extroverts go best with extroverts?, etc.
The direction of energy is derived from our primary function and deals with extroversion vs. introversion. It is best for romantic relationships if this preference is about equal distance from the center on the extroversion-introversion continuum, but in opposite directions.
The judging-perceiving preference is where many conflicts between marriage partners occur. The perceiver is looking for additional input, keeping their options open, while the judger is looking for more control of various facets of their life by seeking closure.
yes, this helps thanks. I was looking more for an example of which types you mean by this, if possible. I am curious to know.
lol at the disclaimer. Thanks again for offering your insight. I appreciate the thought you put into that. That explanation was very clear. So, theoretically then, (according to your personal experience) our best type would be someone like an ENFJ given than we were a hardcore ISTJ?
Yes, I would believe that they make a great match for ISTJs. Of course, they are rare and that means that someone would be left without a seat when the music stopped if we based our entire decision to marry on this alone. So, thankfully, all types can marry and make a go of it with a little more work.
Hmmmm. ESFJ you say? Excellent. A new type to go read about.:laughing:
I wish people walked around with their 4 letters above their head. I would like to meet an INTJ. I poked around in the INTJ forums for a while and it seemed like an interesting place. I couldn't see a real difference in the way they posted when compared to ISTJs. Seemed very similar.
Sidenote: Whatever happened to that nice INTJ that used to lurk here?:mellow: