[Dove]

We are a small team of 3: INTJ as team leader, an ISTJ and an ESFJ.

Communicating instructions and clarifying tasks is easy and efficient with ISTJ. Once the job requirements are understood, off she goes. She completes all tasks efficiently and with very high quality. If she makes any mistakes, she feels ashamed and without prompting she re-does all work till the job is done to a great satisfaction.

Communicating instructions and clarifying tasks is very difficult with ESFJ. She always says that she understands and feels very annoyed when queried about details. Often she makes mistakes and mostly she will deny it was her fault. She will pin it on wrong instructions or any other available excuse.
Asking her to repeat the instructions is very offensive to her. The only reasonable outcome so far, is to give her a list of each task required, date of completion and expected outcomes. I can see she doesn’t like it, but it is the only way so far she will accomplish the job to requirements.

BTW, the work we do is of a technical nature and ESFJ does not have problems understanding the job at the level of her performance requirements.

I was wondering if there was a better way for an INTJ of communicating with an ESFJ? Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Thrifty Walrus]

Sounds likely maybe she has something against you personally, could that be a possibility?

 

[Dove]

Yes, that is always a possibility. I sometimes have considered it.
Although mostly it seems to be a result of lack of emotional support. She needs plenty of it.
When I comply, work is smoother but it is extremely time consuming for me and unbelievably exhausting.

Thank you for your suggestion though. Any more ideas?

 

[Claussen]

Maybe if you did _ometing nice for _ er at t_e begining of t_e day (_ay bring _er coffee or a cookie or a compliment) It will _et t_e rig_t mood for t_e re_t of t_e day, and it mig_t _ave you time and take care of _ er feelling cared for. Good luck.
P.S. Sometime_ _ ome letter_ don't want to appear. Ye_, again, I'm _aving i__ue_ wit_ my computer. I've put t_e "_" to __ow t_e mi__ing letter_.

 

[Dove]

Claussen, Thank you for your comments.

I tried the coffee and it took me half an hour to get away from her.
I tried leaving some nice chocolates on her desk. And she enjoyed that very much. But it did not last long.
I've tried compliments as well, but they too, do not last long.

The thing is that I am really getting tired of the amount of social interaction she needs to function. I takes time away from MY job and that really frustrates me, so I end up becoming upset an unapproachable. And so it goes ...!

PS. As for your compu, try a new keyboard. They sell them very cheap in supermarkets like, ummm, let's see.... Safeway? :crazy:

 

[Claussen]

No keyboards at Safeway. But guess what? Re-starting the computer did the trick
And for the woman at work, keep the task lists coming and now it'll be on her to make the best of her workday.