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INTJs 'create' their friends

2728 Views 17 Replies 16 Participants Last post by  Elyasis
There is a joke that INTJs don't make friends they 'create' them.

What would your ideal friend consist of? What applications and attachments would you install?

My Ideal Friend would come with the following-

- The operating system would be Linux (of course)
- Flame retardant/ water proof skin
- Sarcastic/ dry humour
- Spell check device
- Speakers installed with all my music uploaded
- 1337 driving skillz
- USB ports all up their back
- Laser beam eyes
- Credit card facility
- Superior intelligence
- Voice recognition
- Doesn't talk back
- Calorie counting scanner so I don't need to work out the calories in my food.
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A nice slab of Basalt would have all necessary features.
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Fr e end
Dont understand the question
My friend would be operated with my brilliant and all knowing mind. :p

- Flamethrower attachment.
- Teleportation device.
- Mobile library.
- Microwave.
- Money generator (In any currency).
- Cat creator.
- Ultimate form of humour (Aka mine).
- Invincibility.
- An IQ of over 9000. (Just below mine).
- A hand to slap me whenever I drift off and stop paying attention.
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I forgot to add that my friend would have this as his permanent expression. :p

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Hmm, good question. I get to create a friend. How fun.

I would start with IncredibleMouse Basic Edition
Install the Intelligence 2250 API Library
Attach the FlightPack
Install the Invsibility AddOn
Uninstall Ego Masters v3.14159265
Delete the Neighbors folder

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Robocon 2.0 is a refined model from a previous Robocon prototype that melted because it could not support a nuclear reactor. This model will contain one sarcasm chip, one deductive reasoning chip, one inductive reasoning chip, a child-like curiosity chip, one self-destruct button, an IPOD player, an artificial neuronal matrix and electronic-chemical nervous center, a trashcan, and a female Russian voice communicator.

There will be many modes for this robot:

1.) Shut the fuck up mode
2.) Observe and immediately replicate mode
3.) Data synthesis and compute mode
4.) Sex mode
5.) Clean up mode
6.) Friendly, charming mode
7.) Cynical, sarcastic mode
8.) Kung-Fu mode

And so on.
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Alone, bad... Friend, good..

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- Ability to become bigger/smaller at will
- Complete obedience, but also ability to think for himself.
- Transformation abilites
- Scanning abilities (can scan anything and report the everything about the item to me)
- Intelligent
- Has all the facts in the universe stored inside
- Mind reader

Why can't I build this into myself instead? :( (Except the obedience to anyone, ofc).
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How is cloning technology these days? I think I just want a replica of myself... guys are missing out. creating a friend is no fun when you already know what to expect:sad:
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My synthetic friend:
- Looks like Captain Jack Sparrow
- Is an authorized, functional U.S. Mint
- Is "fully functional" and "programmed in multiple techniques"
- Comes with an Iron Man suit
- Can play any musical instrument, and has a sexy singing voice
- Can drive or pilot any car, plane, motorcycle, or boat
- Has all the knowledge in the known universe
- Has attained the highest level of every known dance and martial art
- Can be used as a flotation device, a fire extinguisher and the Jaws of Life

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So many options, so little time!
The other 1/2 of my brain is my friend. At times when my brain is not there the wall is my friend.
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The other 1/2 of my brain is my friend. At times when my brain is not there the wall is my friend.
At least the wall doesn't let you down.

My perfect friend would know when to draw me out and when to leave me alone, would make meals and clean so I wouldn't have to worry about such mundane things, and would let me know when my ideas are bunk and I've left this world too far behind.
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Sounds like many of you want some kind of super butler/maid...

Yeah, that sounds about right.
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