Perhaps you should change your body disposition so that you would physically appear to be listening. I've dealt with many ENFPs and most of them had a nasty habit of not being able to maintain eye contact or even face me when I'm talking to them.O my sister hates to repeat herself...I mean she doesn't speak loud and she doesn't speak clearly and sometime it seems like it's on purpose...but when you ask her (even in a nice way) to repeat herself, she gets pissed off...I don't get it because it's usually her fault...I've just stopped caring about what she says because it's too hard to deal with her attitude. If i don't hear what she says, I just say "I didn't hear what you said sorry" and walk away in fear that she'll still get mad...she gets pissed off easily which kinda pisses me off because I'm always really nice to her
I don't understand what's so bad about it...if someone doesn't hear you or happens to not be paying attention for one reason or another, why does that drive you bad shit crazy? Why try to make sense of it? INTJs tend to come to the worst conclusions when they try to make sense of what others do...in fact they never come up with anything good when they try to make sense of other people in my experience
Sorry, I just found your entire 2nd paragraph to be extremely rude (we make poor judgment calls? Read the first point in the quote). It's pretty normal for dom/aux Fi to constantly think that they're always right.-ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.
-A problem area for ENFPs in relationships is their dislike of conflict and sensitivity to criticism. They are perfectionists who believe that any form of criticism is a stab at their character, which is very difficult for them to take. Conflict situations are sources of extreme stress to the ENFP. They have a tendency to brush issues under the rug rather than confront them head-on, if there is likely to be a conflict. They are also prone to "give in" easily in conflict situations, just to end the conflict. They might agree to something which goes against their values just to end the uncomfortable situation. In such cases, the problem is extended and will return at a later time. The ENFP needs to realize that conflict situations are not the end of the world. They are entirely normal, and can be quite helpful for the growth of a relationship. They also need to work on taking criticism for what it is, rather than blowing up any negative comment into an indictment against their entire character.
I sometimes hate repeating myself...but I'm willing to accept that i didn't speak loud or clearly enough or maybe the person has hearing problems...I agree with you on feeling self conscious about what you're saying...I always have this fear that what I'm saying is wrong or completely off...that again is about my social anxiety that I'm just now getting over...but I'm trying to change that to be more aloof...who the hell cares what people think? No one should hinder your ability to have funI dislike repeating myself.
It wastes energy and interrupts my train of thought. And i rarely say anything interesting enough to be worth repeating, so it makes me self-conscious about what i'm saying.
But I often ask other people to repeat themselves, because I'm not that bright, and sometimes i have to hear things multiple times before they sinks in.
This is my biggest pet peeve. It's totally illogical because I have a tendency to mumble my words when I think people aren't paying attention. (This naturally leads to them not being able to hear me, and requiring to ask me to repeat myself.) But it ticks me off. Even if it's my favorite person in the whole world asking very politely, "Pardon me?" I have to take a deep breath in order to refrain from biting their head off. I explain this irrational attitude by a couple of things; 1) repeating ones self is completely inefficient, and 2) unless I just told you the secrets to the universe, what I said probably isn't worth the effort it'll take to repeat myself a second time. But maybe I'm wrong and there's some underlying, subconscious reason for my deep irritation.I hate repeating myself. I don't understand why the hell I should repeat a point I have already made.How about you?
I completely agree. I have no idea why I hate repeating myself. I just do. Even if I know someone didn't hear what I said, it requires that I pull energy from the deep within to repeat it.This is my biggest pet peeve. It's totally illogical because I have a tendency to mumble my words when I think people aren't paying attention. (This naturally leads to them not being able to hear me, and requiring to ask me to repeat myself.) But it ticks me off. Even if it's my favorite person in the whole world asking very politely, "Pardon me?" I have to take a deep breath in order to refrain from biting their head off. I explain this irrational attitude by a couple of things; 1) repeating ones self is completely inefficient, and 2) unless I just told you the secrets to the universe, what I said probably isn't worth the effort it'll take to repeat myself a second time. But maybe I'm wrong and there's some underlying, subconscious reason for my deep irritation.
I do that too. I probably agree that it's because I'm browsing through or gathering my thoughts... & When I speak publically, people often ask me to speak louder.That's cool! I mumble a lot when I talk, probably because I'm gathering my thoughts.
Yes, when having a debate it's preferable that the other party can keep track with the essentials, otherwise it just seems like a futile attempt to reach any forthcoming ideas (out in the open, at least).When it comes to repeating things simply because the other person may not have caught everything I said, I don't mind. I occasionally have to ask other people to repeat themselves too.
However, when I have to repeat something over the course of several minutes, hours, days, or any significant length of time, I get really annoyed. Usually it's when people just don't seem to be grasping what it is that I'm saying, or they aren't paying enough attention. For example, last semester I got into a bit of a debate with a guy from a group project I was in. He kept going back and repeating arguments that I had already addressed, and I was getting really aggravated having to refute the same stuff over again. It's a huge annoyance to me, and it often makes me question the other person's competence.
Do you finish people's sentences? I used to do that. Or I'd come up with the word they're looking for. Good times :tongue:I have a photographic memory...so yes, I hate repeating myself just about as much as I hate it when someone tells me the same old story for the tenth time. It is odd how people don't appreciate it when I cut them off two words in and repeat their story or instructions verbatim to save them the trouble. haha