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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
The best relationship I've had was with an ISFP. We broke up due to long-distance. But judging from their forum, there's something about us that irks them, which got me thinking that maybe I was the only one who enjoyed the relationship, while he was wondering how long he would have to be stuck with an annoying, emotionless girl.

Anyways, for those who have encountered ISFPs in real life, what's your take on them?
 

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I like them very much so. I like them because they can be quite abstract, which us INTP's can relate to. Although it is a very different kind of abstract......kind of hard to explain :confused:
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I like them very much so. I like them because they can be quite abstract, which us INTP's can relate to. Although it is a very different kind of abstract......kind of hard to explain :confused:
I think there's also the inability to express our feelings, which we have in common. But I think they feel emotions more intensely though. I'm not sure...
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
One of my best friends is an ISFP. And, by generalizing from just one example, they are AWESOME!:crazy:
I've only ever met one myself. Something about them just fascinate me. Maybe cos they are harder than most to figure out. :laughing:
 

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My OH is ISFP, and is awesome, my very best friend.

The trick is not to piss them off. And you may have to work hard at the relationship. Yeah, you have to compromise a bit, which may be difficult for some NTs. When you get it right, it is a very happy and fulfilling relationship.
 
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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
My OH is ISFP, and is awesome, my very best friend.

The trick is not to piss them off. And you may have to work hard at the relationship. Yeah, you have to compromise a bit, which may be difficult for some NTs. When you get it right, it is a very happy and fulfilling relationship.
As in not being too pushy?
 

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As in not being too pushy?
To a certain extent. Actually, sometimes you need to push to get what you want from them. Other times, it's best to give them their own space. Unfortunately, you only learn from experience.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
To a certain extent. Actually, sometimes you need to push to get what you want from them. Other times, it's best to give them their own space. Unfortunately, you only learn from experience.
I've been reading ISFP threads, and they are very different from us, aren't they? I have yet to find out as to why I like that we're still in contact. But from what I've gathered so far, it may be best to leave him alone, at least until I've figured out what I want from him. I was actually quite surprised to learn a few days ago that he's an ISFP as he doesn't wear his heart on the sleeve. I suppose ISFPs are generally good at hiding their feelings for they would be vulnerable otherwise.
 

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they are very different from us, aren't they?.
Why I find them fascinating. But they are completely no bs whatsoever.

I have yet to find out as to why I like that we're still in contact. But from what I've gathered so far, it may be best to leave him alone, at least until I've figured out what I want from him.
Don't think about it too long.

I was actually quite surprised to learn a few days ago that he's an ISFP as he doesn't wear his heart on the sleeve.
Hmmmmm...Have to think about that one, not so sure mine does either.

I suppose ISFPs are generally good at hiding their feelings for they would be vulnerable otherwise
Uhuh. But with people they trust, their feelings gush like a waterfall, believe me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Don't think about it too long.
Uhuh. But with people they trust, their feelings gush like a waterfall, believe me.
I think I lost that trust when we broke up... It was a complicated situation, which I never got a chance to explain to him properly. It's been eight years, and I still can't let go. It was made worse because he continued to contact me in the first five years. Then, I changed my number because it was near impossible to move on if I didn't take drastic measures. Three years of silence, and guess what? I dreamed of him marrying someone else, and suddenly I *had to know*. It's not logical, I know. Almost every decision I've made, I'm able to reason, but not when it comes to him. It's really frustrating. :dry:
 

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ISFPs :unsure: Run away! Far away!!

I've been reading ISFP threads, and they are very different from us, aren't they? I have yet to find out as to why I like that we're still in contact. But from what I've gathered so far, it may be best to leave him alone, at least until I've figured out what I want from him. I was actually quite surprised to learn a few days ago that he's an ISFP as he doesn't wear his heart on the sleeve. I suppose ISFPs are generally good at hiding their feelings for they would be vulnerable otherwise.
They are different than us because their cognitive functions are about as opposite from us as can be.

The ones I know I don't get along with at all!
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
ISFPs :unsure: Run away! Far away!!

They are different than us because their cognitive functions are about as opposite from us as can be.

The ones I know I don't get along with at all!
Care to elaborate? :mellow:
 

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Care to elaborate? :mellow:
INTP is Ti-Ne-Si-Fe (shadows: Te-Ni-Se-Fi)
ISFP is Fi-Se-Ni-Te (shadows: Fe-Si-Ne-Ti)

it's the complete opposite order, therefore they couldn't be more different from us.

Here are some traits that I've observed in more than one ISFP that get under my skin. Not all ISFPs may behave like this, but I can find threads confirming some do.

* freely use guilt and other forms of manipulation to get what they want
* Make everything about them and their feelings (you'll never have your feelings validated with a person like this)
* never take the blame for anything, they are the ultimate victim
* couldn't comprehend that maybe you were too busy to answer the phone for their call- it's a personal affront (Ni misguesses your motives and Fi takes it personally)-- this ties into "everything is about them"
* you don't dare treat them the way the treat you or else-- this won't fly with the INTPs need for a balanced relationship
* don't acquire skills for much of anything, rely on others to do things and provide for them, using manipulation tactics as needed.

I hope they all aren't like this, but I do know some are.
 

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I think I lost that trust when we broke up... It was a complicated situation, which I never got a chance to explain to him properly
Oh heck, yeah, that's hard. I've had ups and downs with mine, particularly in the early stages. Getting trust back again is akin to climbing a mountain.

The ones I know I don't get along with at all!
Interesting. I've had a fascinating time in the ISFP forum lately, I think they're fab, heyho.

All that said, with the emotional minefield I went through in my teens and twenties, I would have to think long and hard, that if I had another serious relationship in my life, whether the hard work of getting to know an ISFP would be worth it. Best buddies with one? Absolutely. Love and marriage again? Maybe not. Could send me to an earlier grave.:crazy:
 
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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Make everything about them and their feelings (you'll never have your feelings validated with a person like this)
* never take the blame for anything, they are the ultimate victim
* couldn't comprehend that maybe you were too busy to answer the phone for their call- it's a personal affront (Ni misguesses your motives and Fi takes it personally)-- this ties into "everything is about them"
* you don't dare treat them the way the treat you or else-- this won't fly with the INTPs need for a balanced relationship
Are they females? I'd imagine male ISFPs to be less sensitive than their female counterparts. If anything, he was always there to comfort me when I got frustrated with those emotional bouts that I experienced from time to time.

All that said, with the emotional minefield I went through in my teens and twenties, I would have to think long and hard, that if I had another serious relationship in my life, whether the hard work of getting to know an ISFP would be worth it. Best buddies with one? Absolutely. Love and marriage again? Maybe not. Could send me to an earlier grave.
Which type do you reckon would be your ideal mate?
 

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The isfps that I have dated would pretend to agree with things that I was saying at times, even if they weren't really firm on it, even if they didn't agree at all actually.. then later go against it, even if it was something about an important value for example. This would lead to moments where I felt really disillusioned when an issue was brought up, and silly me, I'd thought that it wouldn't be an issue because of what was "decided" between the two of us, before. It really fucked with my head majorly, because I'd been trusting them all along, trusting that we were on the same page.. but really they were just agreeing in the moment to keep the peace, but what was at their core was much, much different from mine. This could carry out for a very long time before I realized it, putting me in a position where I thought that I was in love with a person who was -oh- SO similar to me, right? Heh.
 
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The isfps that I have dated would pretend to agree with things that I was saying at times, even if they weren't really firm on it, even if they didn't agree at all actually.. then later go against it, even if it was something about an important value for example. This would lead to moments where I felt really disillusioned when an issue was brought up, and silly me, I'd thought that it wouldn't be an issue because of what was "decided" between the two of us, before. It really fucked with my head majorly, because I'd been trusting them all along, trusting that we were on the same page.. but really they were just agreeing in the moment to keep the peace, but what was at their core was much, much different from mine. This could carry out for a very long time before I realized it, putting me in a position where I thought that I was in love with a person who was -oh- SO similar to me, right? Heh.
Oh, tell me about it. Even when their non-verbal communication screams "I don't agree", they never, ever admit it. Even though it's painfully obvious. And then they get bitter later, EVEN THOUGH YOU TOLD THEM YOU KNEW THEY WERE BS'ING YOU!:angry:

ISFP-INTP combos are weird with me. They have the same approach to life as me, but they are nothing like me. I do like them generally though...quiet, sensitive, nurturing, harmless (well, it's true:tongue:), and they are always willing to listen to what I have to say. They do not always understand me, but they often interested in what I have to say and respect me, which makes me like them very much.

Anyway this one ISFP I know has a very strong Ni, and I can tell you that ISP's with well-developed Ni's are completely different cups of tea. I get on very well with these people.
 
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