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Murder will happen... in my case, it will. :)
I feel that your post is somewhat impersonal and to be honest, who wants anybody to be prepared with answers and actually kind of never learn to listen to them and create intimacies together as a couple but to have gotten advice from someone else, from other sources such that, it becomes like.. you are being manipulated or fished deliberately ? You owe it to yourself and the person that you date to learn about one another, and also you owe it to them to keep the relationship real, honest, and hopeful.

External parties can give advice here and there to make one feels good, and to support you but ultimately you got to fight for the relationship yourself in your own terms, your own way...
 

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You're not really ever ready if you talk of "control" and of "power", that is what guys do... as they strive for independence,but in reality, the girl is also trying to get her needs met as well. For any relationship to work, it is if there is room for both needs to be met. That's it ! Sometimes it is the girl being down, you gotta support her in order to speculate a future together. Other times it could bet he guy who is down, and she has to support him... It's a dynamic and momentum.

So how can anyone just summarise all this for you? Cos if you see the world as a "black and white" solution cheatsheet, then you won't see the subtleties and the beauty of life, and of your partner too. You won't even feel it.
 
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