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Discussion Starter #1
In the effort of understanding you Perceiving men better, I thought I'd get it right from you:

What makes you attracted to a woman mentally, physically, intellectually, etc? I found one particular INTP male I'm trying to dissect and it's been a unique, challenging process... :crazy: Also, in what way would a girl who continually flattered and flirted attract you, despite frequent mean outbursts?

 

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Personally, I could care less about looks.

The person has to be intellectually unique and interesting; someone who will bounce my ideas and give insight in conversations, and willing to talk about such topics at any given moment. I particularly like those who can state their opinions without being worried about our opinions being different. For example, if I said I like heavy metal, and she said she didn't like it, without pretending to like it just to have the same interests, I would consider her interesting.

I also like people who aren't clingy and respect my time alone. Better yet, I like people who will not only be able to accept my satirical humor, but capable of coming back with a witty remark. If I made a sarcastic joke about her, and she made a sarcastic joke about me in reply without being offended in any way, she would catch my attention.

I like people who are individualistic, witty, open to new ideas, and proud to be different. I'm attracted to those who are like mysteries or puzzles, people who I can't see through or read their motives.

Hope that helped.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Muchos thanks, Tyrant. And of course, I wouldn't be interested in him in the first place if I didn't find him intellectually stimulating, and, of course, a challenge to understand. (;
What would you say are the top signs you give out that would possibly signal you are attracted to/like a woman? Would you ever try to make her jealous? What about eye contact?

This has helped, again, thanks :)
 

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Personally, I could care less about looks.

The person has to be intellectually unique and interesting; someone who will bounce my ideas and give insight in conversations, and willing to talk about such topics at any given moment. I particularly like those who can state their opinions without being worried about our opinions being different. For example, if I said I like heavy metal, and she said she didn't like it, without pretending to like it just to have the same interests, I would consider her interesting.

I also like people who aren't clingy and respect my time alone. Better yet, I like people who will not only be able to accept my satirical humor, but capable of coming back with a witty remark. If I made a sarcastic joke about her, and she made a sarcastic joke about me in reply without being offended in any way, she would catch my attention.

I like people who are individualistic, witty, open to new ideas, and proud to be different. I'm attracted to those who are like mysteries or puzzles, people who I can't see through or read their motives.

Hope that helped.
That.

Muchos thanks, Tyrant. And of course, I wouldn't be interested in him in the first place if I didn't find him intellectually stimulating, and, of course, a challenge to understand. (;
What would you say are the top signs you give out that would possibly signal you are attracted to/like a woman? Would you ever try to make her jealous? What about eye contact?

This has helped, again, thanks :)
A lot of attention to what they say, act, etc. giving full attention while talking to them and trying to understand them to the core.

Yes, most of these are not proper "signals", but this is quite contrary to how I'd behave with most people. This behaviour is also affected by the fact that I HATE coming off as too clingy or making the said person uncomfortable.

It's hard being an INTP when it comes to relationships.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
That.
It's hard being an INTP when it comes to relationships.
True, or dealing with them for that matter ;)
If you see this, how would you react to the girl making the first set of moves (basically showing you she likes you discreetly)? Do you think you would pick up on it, and if you liked her back would you react favorably?
 

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Muchos thanks, Tyrant. And of course, I wouldn't be interested in him in the first place if I didn't find him intellectually stimulating, and, of course, a challenge to understand. (;
What would you say are the top signs you give out that would possibly signal you are attracted to/like a woman? Would you ever try to make her jealous? What about eye contact?

This has helped, again, thanks :)
I suddenly become distant and slightly insensitive, just to see how she reacts. If she doesn't get overly angry or sensitive about it, I start giving her my full attention; talking to her, getting to know her, but without saying I like her. If I do say something along those lines, I follow it immediately with a joke to not make it seem serious.

In other words, it's not going to be easy for you to pick up those signals.
 

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True, or dealing with them for that matter ;)
If you see this, how would you react to the girl making the first set of moves (basically showing you she likes you discreetly)? Do you think you would pick up on it, and if you liked her back would you react favorably?
Define the said moves. It's hard to pick up on many "cues" for us I suppose. But in verbal comment if it is genuinely implied, I might react to it favourably ...
 

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Discussion Starter #9
I suddenly become distant and slightly insensitive, just to see how she reacts. If she doesn't get overly angry or sensitive about it, I start giving her my full attention; talking to her, getting to know her, but without saying I like her. If I do say something along those lines, I follow it immediately with a joke to not make it seem serious.

In other words, it's not going to be easy for you to pick up those signals.
Damn, you guys like making it hard, don't you? >.< Then again it's not like I make it any easier ;) That's why I like to keep it at friends...until I start analyzing it too much, and that ignorant little voice pops up in my head. *facepalm*

goodgracesbadinfluence- I know, but I just can't help it...especially when I watch him out of the corners of my eyes so much. xD Like seriously, it's a struggle to not watch him 24/7, but then I freak out wondering if he thinks I like him and can pick up on my noticing him. Hahahahaha the circle continues to revolve!
 

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goodgracesbadinfluence- I know, but I just can't help it...especially when I watch him out of the corners of my eyes so much. xD Like seriously, it's a struggle to not watch him 24/7, but then I freak out wondering if he thinks I like him and can pick up on my noticing him. Hahahahaha the circle continues to revolve!
THAT is NOT going to help. I do that. All the time. Try to talk to him. Try to sit next to him or whatever... MAKE him interact with you.

And don't be scared to show that you like him (show only to him though). There is no reason to avoid doing that in fear of worsening your already existing friendship(?). If someone were to tell me they like me and I didn't I would make it clear, yet not let it affect our present relationship...

GOD I'm feeling lovesick today and your thread isn't helping it by pointing out how hopeless we are at showing it. >.<
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Define the said moves. It's hard to pick up on many "cues" for us I suppose. But in verbal comment if it is genuinely implied, I might react to it favourably ...
Defining "cues"...shit. I'd be freaked out to use a verbal comment, LOL.

I suppose the cues from me would be paying more attention, complimenting but not flattering...damn, I'm so close-knitted he would never truly know unless I outright told him. Forget the cues, LOL.

And then there's the eyes. If you like her do your eyes flit away first and do you watch her when you think she isn't looking? Really I need to become less paralyzed...I often think he's watching me, and I can watch him without focusing on him because I'm a woman and have wider peripherial vision. (As a side note did you know if you hold your fingers in circles to your eyes like a ring, it will cut off the side vision of women but not of men?) So when I thought his head was turned to me (with nothing else to look around me, I mean really, I was on a couch by myself studying) I couldn't bring up the courage to look at him, and therefore do not distinctly know he was looking *at* me. But really, red couches aren't that attractive...I suppose. (;

 

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Defining "cues"...shit. I'd be freaked out to use a verbal comment, LOL.

I suppose the cues from me would be paying more attention, complimenting but not flattering...damn, I'm so close-knitted he would never truly know unless I outright told him. Forget the cues, LOL.

And then there's the eyes. If you like her do your eyes flit away first and do you watch her when you think she isn't looking? Really I need to become less paralyzed...I often think he's watching me, and I can watch him without focusing on him because I'm a woman and have wider peripherial vision. (As a side note did you know if you hold your fingers in circles to your eyes like a ring, it will cut off the side vision of women but not of men?) So when I thought his head was turned to me (with nothing else to look around me, I mean really, I was on a couch by myself studying) I couldn't bring up the courage to look at him, and therefore do not distinctly know he was looking *at* me. But really, red couches aren't that attractive...I suppose. (;

I would do that all the time .... ~.~. God you are really similar to me in your behaviour too... JUST TALK TO HIM!!!!

How about asking him what he thinks of the couch since he's been staring at it so intently? ;)
 

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Discussion Starter #13
THAT is NOT going to help. I do that. All the time. Try to talk to him. Try to sit next to him or whatever... MAKE him interact with you.

And don't be scared to show that you like him (show only to him though). There is no reason to avoid doing that in fear of worsening your already existing friendship(?). If someone were to tell me they like me and I didn't I would make it clear, yet not let it affect our present relationship...

GOD I'm feeling lovesick today and your thread isn't helping it by pointing out how hopeless we are at showing it. >.<
LOL And I hate my girly-feely-side is rearing up it's ugly head! I can personally testify to the lovesick feeling. I apologize for being the cause of it but am selfishly glad you have helped me sort out this guy :p

Okay, so I have to MAKE him interact with me. Geeeaahhhh this is hard. I am *not* a people person, until that rare Extroverted side chooses to shine on me occasionally and make me wonder who I really am.
 
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LOL And I hate my girly-feely-side is rearing up it's ugly head! I can personally testify to the lovesick feeling. I apologize for being the cause of it but am selfishly glad you have helped me sort out this guy :p

Okay, so I have to MAKE him interact with me. Geeeaahhhh this is hard. I am *not* a people person, until that rare Extroverted side chooses to shine on me occasionally and make me wonder who I really am.
Remember, He is also Introverted... so one on on e conversation with noone around would be prefferable.
That said... :~{
 

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I would do that all the time .... ~.~. God you are really similar to me in your behaviour too... JUST TALK TO HIM!!!!

How about asking him what he thinks of the couch since he's been staring at it so intently? ;)
Thank you...A LOT. I haven't really ever tried to identify many other personality types except the people I am specifically interested in (self-centered snob, I know) so I can't pinpoint how INTPs act...

Why, the red couch's butt-ons, of course. xD

Okay. No more standing next to him yet ignoring him. Talk to him. Good idea, something I can easily accomplish if I know it doesn't have negative side affects...
 

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Remember, He is also Introverted... so one on on e conversation with noone around would be prefferable.
That said... :~{
That's the hard problem...we're nearly always in a classroom setting. >.< It's a very small class (6 peeps total) making it much easier for me to interact with the two other boys. Meaning when I talk to him it won't be as obvious, but not quite one-on-one time. The harder problem is his mask, ripping it apart/getting under it will be a challenge. I relish it, of course, but it just adds to the problem. However I can't really complain because I have done the same thing!
One annoying thing with him is he does so much stuff, you can't really figure out what he LIKES LIKES LIKES. Yes, I have a good bit of activities but my passion is dog-related stuff (showing, obedience, you get the gist.) We have a lot of similar activities yet I have to find out which ones really turn him on and which ones he does just for his parents.
 

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That's the hard problem...we're nearly always in a classroom setting. >.< It's a very small class (6 peeps total) making it much easier for me to interact with the two other boys. Meaning when I talk to him it won't be as obvious, but not quite one-on-one time. The harder problem is his mask, ripping it apart/getting under it will be a challenge. I relish it, of course, but it just adds to the problem. However I can't really complain because I have done the same thing!
One annoying thing with him is he does so much stuff, you can't really figure out what he LIKES LIKES LIKES. Yes, I have a good bit of activities but my passion is dog-related stuff (showing, obedience, you get the gist.) We have a lot of similar activities yet I have to find out which ones really turn him on and which ones he does just for his parents.
Classroom eh?

Try this. Don't do your homework, assignment, etc. or leave a part of it. Pick something which he is SURE to have done. Then next day ask him if you can copy his. Sit next to him. Ask "so do you like <assignment subject>?".
If yes ask what about it he likes so much.
If no, then "so what DO you like?"

Hope this helps ;)
 

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If you see this, how would you react to the girl making the first set of moves (basically showing you she likes you discreetly)? Do you think you would pick up on it, and if you liked her back would you react favorably?
Interestingly, if a girl I'm not interested in makes the first move, I'd be pretty well prepared for it. Pretty much calm and unaffected. If I actually like this person, though, I'd get frustrated or nervous. Then I'd try to deflect it with sarcasm, humor— anything. Really, you'd see the signs. lol
 

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Discussion Starter #19
Classroom eh?

Try this. Don't do your homework, assignment, etc. or leave a part of it. Pick something which he is SURE to have done. Then next day ask him if you can copy his. Sit next to him. Ask "so do you like <assignment subject>?".
If yes ask what about it he likes so much.
If no, then "so what DO you like?"

Hope this helps ;)
Sigh...yes, classroom. >.< And good idea.

The cool thing is he has this photographic memory. He can watch a Julian Smith video and remember everything in it, when I've seen it ten times and can't mimic it as well. :3
Well thank you for hashing this out with me. Definitely given me some encouragement and ideas and whatnot...sad thing is I won't be able to work this out for two more weeks; I'll be out of town during next class. Oh well, I have my own life.
At this point I'm dried up, especially because I can't interrogate you on body language, which is obviously my favorite part. Now the rubber meets the road and I have to continue to develop a friendship via words. Least favorite part. >.<

 
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Sigh...yes, classroom. >.< And good idea.

The cool thing is he has this photographic memory. He can watch a Julian Smith video and remember everything in it, when I've seen it ten times and can't mimic it as well. :3
Well thank you for hashing this out with me. Definitely given me some encouragement and ideas and whatnot...sad thing is I won't be able to work this out for two more weeks; I'll be out of town during next class. Oh well, I have my own life.
At this point I'm dried up, especially because I can't interrogate you on body language, which is obviously my favorite part. Now the rubber meets the road and I have to continue to develop a friendship via words. Least favorite part. >.<

May Luck be with you!
 
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