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I have always loved INTPs because they generally tell you exactly what they mean. They want to make sure they tell you everything in a very concise, efficient, and honest manner. But I have noticed something ....and that is what I am about to ask you about.

I will give you a couple examples. But you do not necessarily have to read them.

Ex 1: My friend bob is an INTP. He noticed that I had just broken up with my INTP girlfriend Jane and was taking interest in a girl named Alanna. My INTP friend bob tells me ...I heard you and Jane broke up....you should go for that new girl Alanna. Then we start talking bout how he saw Jane at school and talked to her about me. He apparently asked her how things were with me....and she did not seem emotionally troubled. ANYWAY after all this he restates....you should go for Alanna.

I suspect that Bob is trying to get to me to date Alanna because he has taken a slight interest in Jane. However, I have a feeling that if I asked him....he would give me the obvious reply....no. But I am not sure.

Ex 2: My girlfriend Mimi(INTP) has just cheated on me with another guy whom she claims to have no feelings for. I tell her I am not comfortable with her talking to him or associating with him in anyway and she agrees. Two weeks later she tells me that he is having another party and then insists it she was asking because her friends were going...not because of him. I tell her I don't want her to go. Two more weeks pass and she brings him up again....nothing big....just subtle mentions.



BASICALLY!

I am not sure if I can trust an INTP when they tell me how they feel about someone or even me sometimes. Why? Well.....it is hard to explain really.....the conclusion has come from Ne and Fi......but I will try ....bare with me.

I have noticed that me and my intp friends.....our feelings......they flow in the same manner. If we are perceiving similar things with each other.....I am more able to explain their feelings.....than they are. I will say something from my own Fi judgement.....and they will say.....yeaaa I feel that way to.....but they would never say such a thing themselves. If me and my intp girlfriend fight....then the next day.....we are .....gosh....it is so hard to explain.....there is no word for it.....we are in ....the same mood sort of......but not just sad....or happy.....but ...I give up.

I am wondering if I am more aware of my fellow intp's feelings....than they are.....because it certainly feels like it. But sometimes when I tell them my intuitions....that may cause trouble (i.e. feelings for someone else) or that may express something they do not want to admit......then they say no.....I do not feel that way.....because they are afraid that I am correct....and because they were not aware of it until I told them.


K. I am done.


I question whether or not I can trust an INTP when they tell me how they feel about something. They often tell me how they feel about things.....but I find myself questioning them sometimes.
 

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I understand what you're speaking of, and have experienced it myself. NF's can often sense an NT's emotions before they themselves are aware of it. However, an INTP is innocent throughout the process. They truly believe they feel a certain emotion, or desire a certain outcome, when they.. don't. It's hard to explain, but I think you understand.. I'm not sure if all INTP's are like this, though.

edit-- INTP's may be too hesitant or fearful to admit you're right, too. It's a little terrifying to witness your NF friend grasp a deep feeling/principle before you do. The INTP's autonomous core feels vulnerable when someone can understand them, or see through them, with such clarity and ease. It's somewhat unsettling. I think.
 

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Fe as an inferior function is a rather confounding thing. INFJs often have to stop and re-center themselves from time to time to make sense of how they feel about a situation, and it's their secondary function. INTPs have it down at the tail end.

Truth be told, I don't know how I feel the vast majority of the time. I can look at cues in my behavior, the nature of my actions and reactions, attach mental notes new ones as I come to notice them arising and say "Oh, that's what that emotion is like," but to have someone ask me point blank about my emotional state isn't going to get them very far most of the time. NFs can be helpful when it comes to making sense of them since they naturally read other people's moods and can put words to things that exist in widely uncharted territory for us.

Even so, I have to figure things out for myself before I can put much credibility into its being true for me on any sort of substantial or personal level, and it takes a great deal more energy for me to wrap my head around a unfamiliar emotion than, say, a programming language.

To sum up; I can easily say what I think I feel in an off the cuff manner, but that doesn't guarantee it's substantially "heartfelt" unless I've already made sense of it.
 

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I'm going to go smoke a cigarette, and come back and write a long thing about how I handle expressing feelings.

Unless I lose interest, but I don't think I will. 10 minutes can't possibly make me ADD that hard.....

*kills himself*

Oh, right. I forgot about this. But yea, I'm still down.

So uh. Yea this is a strange topic for an INTP. Cuz like. You're right. You DO understand our feelings more than we do. Everyone probably does (well, feelers). But you kinda gotta look at it like... an INTP tries to understand always. And feelings....well, there is nothing about them that is "understandable" minus acknowledging them and the fact they are real. That is as far as an INTP can take it.

It's kinda the same as like....if you made a decision based on your feelings that was also rational, an INTP would hands down understand the logic behind it and give weight to THAT aspect of the decision in a way more understanding way than you yourself did, because that's not how you do.

But I don't wanna leave you feeling like you can't trust an INTP when they address their feelings to you (if and when they ever do), because an INTP just can't have that. That type of thing makes us feel terrible. And this terrible feeling, is as far as we take the feeling. From that point on, we logic the fuck out and try to fix it.

So I'm going to fix it by explaining that....even though your interpretation of their emotional reasonings and motives for their actions are without a doubt more easily understood by you than ourselves, that form of thinking is NOT a factor for us. And they AREN'T being "dishonest" about anything or hiding anything. The only time I care about my emotions enough to not talk about them is if I don't get them, because then they are irrelevant. Simple things. I love my cat. I love food. I love to love. But as for how I'd feel about this guy I hardly knew and fucked once in a fuck up that I regretted when I was drinking while in a relationship I had a desire to be in.... that's tricky. And it would also be irrelevant. Thus why you haven't been offered and in-depth explanation of her emotional motivation. There is none.

You can even look at the fact that that your girlfriend keeps mentioning that fella subtly as a good sign. If she did have feelings for this person more than she is letting on, then she has already DECIDED upon it and come to terms with it and performed any justification that was needed for the scenario she found herself in. She seems to me to be treating it as if it were nothing, which is how she probably feels about it. This paragraph should be read while keeping in mind that I don't know anything else about the situation that you described, and I was just using it as a relate able example to explain INTP's in a general sense.

INTP feelings are child-like in how simple and pure they are. Yours are not (I imagine, I really have no fucking concept of what that'd be like). We ARE honest, including about feelings, and there is no reason anyone should doubt our rare expressions of them. Feel free to question to your hearts content, but you really gotta understand that anywhere you take your analysis of these portrayed feelings is YOUR emotional response to their situation, which the INTP lacks.

'eh?

:)

<3

EDIT: Also, well said Trope.
 

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I cant track my emotions. No way. I can go someplace and genuinely believe im having a good time, only to discover hours after i get home that it was a horrible experience and i dont even know why.

Fi/Fe so fucked up with me that i Ne my emotions instead. So talking about them with somebody else at length helps me make sense of them.

Sometimes i might think i feel some way, but later i realize i dont. So, for the most part my understanding of my emotional state should be taken with a grain of salt. I would never lie about it though. If i say i feel something is because i truly think so.
 
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i know what you mean..but i dont know how to explain it any better than people above me...i still personally have issues with communication for the most part, especially about emotions because they get so damn confusing...
 

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I'm going to go smoke a cigarette, and come back and write a long thing about how I handle expressing feelings.

Unless I lose interest, but I don't think I will. 10 minutes can't possibly make me ADD that hard.....

*kills himself*

Oh, right. I forgot about this. But yea, I'm still down.

So uh. Yea this is a strange topic for an INTP. Cuz like. You're right. You DO understand our feelings more than we do. Everyone probably does (well, feelers). But you kinda gotta look at it like... an INTP tries to understand always. And feelings....well, there is nothing about them that is "understandable" minus acknowledging them and the fact they are real. That is as far as an INTP can take it.

It's kinda the same as like....if you made a decision based on your feelings that was also rational, an INTP would hands down understand the logic behind it and give weight to THAT aspect of the decision in a way more understanding way than you yourself did, because that's not how you do.

But I don't wanna leave you feeling like you can't trust an INTP when they address their feelings to you (if and when they ever do), because an INTP just can't have that. That type of thing makes us feel terrible. And this terrible feeling, is as far as we take the feeling. From that point on, we logic the fuck out and try to fix it.

So I'm going to fix it by explaining that....even though your interpretation of their emotional reasonings and motives for their actions are without a doubt more easily understood by you than ourselves, that form of thinking is NOT a factor for us. And they AREN'T being "dishonest" about anything or hiding anything. The only time I care about my emotions enough to not talk about them is if I don't get them, because then they are irrelevant. Simple things. I love my cat. I love food. I love to love. But as for how I'd feel about this guy I hardly knew and fucked once in a fuck up that I regretted when I was drinking while in a relationship I had a desire to be in.... that's tricky. And it would also be irrelevant. Thus why you haven't been offered and in-depth explanation of her emotional motivation. There is none.

You can even look at the fact that that your girlfriend keeps mentioning that fella subtly as a good sign. If she did have feelings for this person more than she is letting on, then she has already DECIDED upon it and come to terms with it and performed any justification that was needed for the scenario she found herself in. She seems to me to be treating it as if it were nothing, which is how she probably feels about it. This paragraph should be read while keeping in mind that I don't know anything else about the situation that you described, and I was just using it as a relate able example to explain INTP's in a general sense.

INTP feelings are child-like in how simple and pure they are. Yours are not (I imagine, I really have no fucking concept of what that'd be like). We ARE honest, including about feelings, and there is no reason anyone should doubt our rare expressions of them. Feel free to question to your hearts content, but you really gotta understand that anywhere you take your analysis of these portrayed feelings is YOUR emotional response to their situation, which the INTP lacks.

'eh?

:)

<3

EDIT: Also, well said Trope.
Basically you're saying that even though I can sense an intps feelings....that doesn't mean they will react the same way to them?

My ex girlfriend would tell me that I shouldn't worry if she was with a bunch of guys....or if she went to some guys house that she cheated on me with....with other guys. So in this situation....I should trust her judgement? Because I know that her feelings may make her do something that she is not planing.....just as you expressed....that little drama part of your paragraph where you explained how you could have gone and did one guy and get drunk etc. Well stuff like that....in a relationship with me....would deeply hurt....

Awesome explanation by the way. ....you too trope
 

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Basically you're saying that even though I can sense an intps feelings....that doesn't mean they will react the same way to them?

My ex girlfriend would tell me that I shouldn't worry if she was with a bunch of guys....or if she went to some guys house that she cheated on me with....with other guys. So in this situation....I should trust her judgement? Because I know that her feelings may make her do something that she is not planing.....just as you expressed....that little drama part of your paragraph where you explained how you could have gone and did one guy and get drunk etc. Well stuff like that....in a relationship with me....would deeply hurt....
well, i think that this comes down to trusting her. its not so much a MBTI related decision as simply can you trust her to do that? if she would go out and do something like that is she really someone that you should be with? also voice your concerns with her maybe? if it was me i might get a little offended, but i would think about it, and probably seriously consider what had been said
 

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Discussion Starter #9
well, i think that this comes down to trusting her. its not so much a MBTI related decision as simply can you trust her to do that? if she would go out and do something like that is she really someone that you should be with? also voice your concerns with her maybe? if it was me i might get a little offended, but i would think about it, and probably seriously consider what had been said
Yea I voiced my concern pretty straightforwardly and she stopped. I guess I was just curious....what if I didn't say anything...
 

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Basically you're saying that even though I can sense an intps feelings....that doesn't mean they will react the same way to them?

My ex girlfriend would tell me that I shouldn't worry if she was with a bunch of guys....or if she went to some guys house that she cheated on me with....with other guys. So in this situation....I should trust her judgement? Because I know that her feelings may make her do something that she is not planing.....just as you expressed....that little drama part of your paragraph where you explained how you could have gone and did one guy and get drunk etc. Well stuff like that....in a relationship with me....would deeply hurt....
Hmm. Yes and no. Think of an INTP as experiencing their emotions through tunnel vision. Your eyes are wide open. But our view is shitty, so it hardly matters at all when it concerns forming our reality. True, we can see. But it's incredibly limited. Just because YOU can fill in all our black areas, doesn't mean it's actually a part of who we are at all. All we know for sure is that tiny little tunnel, anything else is bullshit and irrelevant.

But like....I'd trust her judgement. I mean, who do you think is judging her better, you or herself? It's a leap of faith no matter what, but these situations have never not involved such things.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
what do you mean? the past is something concrete that happened...thinking about what could have happened in a "what if" situation is pointless to me is what i was saying...:mellow:
I see what you're saying. I am going into a "what if" situation because there was information there that I did not understand, that I want to understand fully. Why? Because I am curious and plus I think it would help me understand INTPs better. I don't want to misinterpret you guys.
 
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