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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Anyone have this happen to them? I like teasing my friends because I know they can handle it. Blunt humour, sarcastic remarks, funny words in a sentence etc. (basically Ne-humour).

So the other day, I was on a teasing marathon with my INFJ friend and an onlooker said that we'd be dating within a month! Whaaat? But this isn't the first time someone has said this, sometimes when I'm joking with my other friends, there have been a few times when someone has asked if we were 'together'. Now, I'm just worried that I might be leading people on with my joking, I warm up to people at a rate depending on their personality type. And sometimes it can be quite fast, ENTPs for example, I warm up to them as soon as we start talking cause they always like joking around. I've had an ENTJ and ESFP thought I was interested in them before, when I wasn't...

Any other INTPs have their bantering/joking tendencies mistaken for flirting? :wink:

Now I'm thinking about it, is it the Ne communication style combined with the inferior Fe (over-enthusiasm) that makes me people think we're flirting with them???
 

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Yeah. I stopped doing that a year ago, because. People mistake my Ne expressing itself as very very flirting and very much like that which you've expressed. When very happy I also like to use very strange nicknames for people. Like "babe" or "bae" or "sweet heart" to my manly friends and "badass" or "tough guy" to my female friends. It never blends in well with people.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Yeah. I stopped doing that a year ago, because. People mistake my Ne expressing itself as very very flirting and very much like that which you've expressed. When very happy I also like to use very strange nicknames for people. Like "babe" or "bae" or "sweet heart" to my manly friends and "badass" or "tough guy" to my female friends. It never blends in well with people.
Ah, crap! When I'm comfortable with people, I like to give them little insults like, "You're stupid." when they do something stupid. I wonder what kind of trouble ENTPs get into then?
 

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Well flirting by it's very nature isn't meant to be serious so anyone who takes it as a sign of serious interest is taking it the wrong way. Of course flirting is a sign of attraction, but that's all it is. A sign of attraction doesn't mean there is attraction. A sign of attraction doesn't define the type, nature, or intensity of the attraction even if one is certain it exists in the first place.

INTPs can be big flirts with our witty banter and teasing especially when we are around extroverts since we tend to mirror them with our Ne. People who know me well, know not to take my flirting seriously because that's simply how I act when I am around other extroverts in a social situation. When it comes to people I don't know well or other introverts I act much more subdued. If I am interested in exploring a relationship with someone and I want to express that then I'll be genuine, blunt, and straightforward.
 

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I tease individuals I like. And I'm only extra mean if I wanna get in your pants.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I get this often, not sure why since there's no intent to flirt. My INFP sister told me once that the way I was looking at one of her friends was flirty when we were just bantering.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE OFF SWITCH IS HELP.
Me neither?! WE'RE DOOMED!! Yeah, my mother has told me that I have this mischievous look on my face when I'm joking with people. And she always tells me to "Behave." and "Don't be silly."
 

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But I mean like really mean

Like call her names, pick at her ideology, critique her hobbies, etc.
 
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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
But I mean like really mean

Like call her names, pick at her ideology, critique her hobbies, etc.
... I do that to all my guy friends cause I know they can handle it...in so much trouble now! :th_woot: But I'm just naturally critical!
 

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Yeah, I'm naturally critical myself, that is partly why I do it. I'm testing to see if she's someone with who I can be my natural asshole self.
 

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I do that. Oddly enough, I hadn't realized it could be taken as flirting until not very long ago. I understood why my friends' girlfriends always loved me so much...
 

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Now I'm thinking about it, is it the Ne communication style combined with the inferior Fe (over-enthusiasm) that makes me people think we're flirting with them???
Not all people, but it has definitely been my experience that the NFJ types do tend to receive it that way.

But, I do often use humor as flirting, so... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
 

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Yeah, this has happened too much. If I like someone I'm going to insult them, and when that person doesn't get my sense of humor I get into reactive mode and double-down (this is my only 'strategy'). This pretty cute girl I sat next to in French class was very sincere and so what am I supposed to do, but be constantly sarcastic? I would walk her to her car after class. One day, she was driving me to my car and said 'why are you always sarcastic? It's pretty annoying.' That's the last straw... I got serious and said 'I'm obviously joking! Jesus,' and got out of the car.
Lesson learned: avoid spending time with people who don't understand facetiousness or sarcasm.
 

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I have such a monotone voice and such a deadpan sense of humor that my jokes often get taken seriously. At the anime club at school, we were shown an episode of Chibi Vampire and asked to comment on it, and I sarcastically said there wasn't enough blood. About two weeks later, I realized that everybody in the room thought I was genuinely upset that there wasn't enough blood.
 

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I have such a monotone voice and such a deadpan sense of humor that my jokes often get taken seriously. At the anime club at school, we were shown an episode of Chibi Vampire and asked to comment on it, and I sarcastically said there wasn't enough blood. About two weeks later, I realized that everybody in the room thought I was genuinely upset that their wasn't enough blood.
I had long hair several years ago, and a woman in line behind me at the checkout in a grocery store commented that she really liked my hair and wanted to know what my secret was to get it "so shiny." I didn't have any secret to be shared, so I silently pointed to the steaks I was buying.

She looked really puzzled. "Steak?"

"Not the steak per se," I said. "I wring out the blood and soak my hair in it. It absorbs all the growth hormones."

Then she looked horrified instead.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
I had long hair several years ago, and a woman in line behind me at the checkout in a grocery store commented that she really liked my hair and wanted to know what my secret was to get it "so shiny." I didn't have any secret to be shared, so I silently pointed to the steaks I was buying.

She looked really puzzled. "Steak?"

"Not the steak per se," I said. "I wring out the blood and soak my hair in it. It absorbs all the growth hormones."

Then she looked horrified instead.
I actually laughed out loud at your comment!!
 

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It has happened at times.

I remember once attending an event with a close INFP-female friend of mine. We were bantering while going there, and our mutual INTP-friend came to us.

She said immediately,

"Wow. You behave like a real couple, you know that?"

I was surprised and laughed, saying "What? *laugh* No, we're not together!"

Around a month later the INFP-female actually revealed to me that she has a crush on me.

I was even more surprised, but I quickly gathered myself together as she was crying hysterically in front of me, fearing that I would abandon her and not even be friends with her anymore.

Well that wouldn't happen and I assured this to her. Now, years later, she has a husband, a son, a house and a dog and I'm really quite happy for her.
 
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