[ladyhaha]

I'm dating a guy who I'm 95% positive is an INTP. I'd like to introduce him to MBTI, but I wonder if it might do more harm than good. Thoughts?

I hesitate in sharing MBTI with many people but it seems INTP's really dive into it. Any recommended articles or profiles to get him started? A lot of these profiles paint you guys as heartless mega-nerds which I can get downright defensive about.

 

[qingdom]

I'm dating a guy who I'm 95% positive is an INTP. I'd like to introduce him to MBTI, but I wonder if it might do more harm than good. Thoughts?

I hesitate in sharing MBTI with many people but it seems INTP's really dive into it. Any recommended articles or profiles to get him started? A lot of these profiles paint you guys as heartless mega-nerds which I can get downright defensive about.

Cherish the time you have together. The moment you introduce him to MBTI, he's going to use his sponge absorbing trait to hoard all the types, map out cause and effect and attempt to 'figure' you out. As a result, he'll be second guessing everything and you'll get angry at him over nothing because he'll be being him.

Sorry, cynicism at work here. You're more than welcome to take your chances. I'm just tossing this scenario out there for consideration.

 

[NeedsNewNameNow]

The intp.org profile usually resonates the best with INTPs.

I would say gentile introduction and don't base your relationship around it. Gentile because it can be disconcerting to find someone knows more about us then we told them...

 

[NeedsNewNameNow]

Cherish the time you have together. The moment you introduce him to MBTI, he's going to use his sponge absorbing trait to hoard all the types, map out cause and effect and attempt to 'figure' you out. As a result, he'll be second guessing everything and you'll get angry at him over nothing because he'll be being him.

Sorry, cynicism at work here. You're more than welcome to take your chances. I'm just tossing this scenario out there for consideration.

yes there can be harm. I once became interested in an INFJ once I found out she was INFJ and had heard they were a good match. The attraction wasn't organic, and I think it was a mistake because we got more involved than we should have. So let attraction and relationships happen on their own, and only use MBTI as a tool to understand it, not drive it.

 

[Ember]

Yeah, although it's nice when you view it just as Astrology, it's crap when you start taking it as an excuse and start basing your decisions around it. It happens subconsciously for me. It's like, you wouldn't try changing or making an effort just because "that's how I am, so fuck it."

 

[Ember]

I'm dating a guy who I'm 95% positive is an INTP. I'd like to introduce him to MBTI, but I wonder if it might do more harm than good. Thoughts?

I hesitate in sharing MBTI with many people but it seems INTP's really dive into it. Any recommended articles or profiles to get him started? A lot of these profiles paint you guys as heartless mega-nerds which I can get downright defensive about.

It has changed how I perceive relationships for better or worse. I told my ENFP (exgirl)friend about it and both of us were so interested and attracted to the psychology and stuff. When we went through problems, we looked at the possible shortcomings between INTP/ENFP relationships and were comforted by the fact that there were million such cases and in the end, we are much closer now. Although, I am sure, on the other hand, MBTI could have made it far worse as well. It depends on how you use it.

Best of luck on your relationship!

 

[QuietStorm]

I did the same with my best friend, my brother and a crush I had ... they were all EXXX though - and they didn't get into it too much. I'd say 'take your chances' but... it may do more harm than good. Just weigh your options: is it more important for you to have a cheat sheet that may mislead you, or would you rather work your way up from scratch and then leave MBTI for later/after you know for yourself?

 

[nadjasix]

Sometimes I think typology is a conspiracy executed by INTPs. They made the whole thing up so they'd have an excuse to spend hours reading bad prose about 'cognitive functions' on the internet when they were supposed to be filling out forms and doing homework.

 

[qingdom]

Sometimes I think typology is a conspiracy executed by INTPs. They made the whole thing up so they'd have an excuse to spend hours reading bad prose about 'cognitive functions' on the internet when they were supposed to be filling out forms and doing homework.

Scantron sheets... multiple choice answers.... and go.

 

[Moon_Child]

I wanted my current boyfriend to get into MBTI but he said he rather not, as you start subconsciously basing everything you do on 4 letters. He was right.

He actually began to tell me, "Idk about this MBTI, but you are acting quite odd nowadays." I was, and I think it's because I was way more in my head trying to make a connection between my behaviors and said traits I was suppose to have.

My experience with MBTI has been more disappointing than anything. And it's because I wanted to find a niche where I felt I at last fit into, but it just worsened the gap between me and people in general. I am not about to try to see the positive either. I see things for what they are. And most of them have been negatives.

Imo, I don't think you should introduce him to MBTI. I say just date him and be happy and let behaviors arise naturally without connecting them to 4 letters, as my boyfriend says.

MBTI has sorta subconsciously altered my mind; I'm the midst of deprogramming myself. It kinda reminds me of my AP Microeconomics class in high school, when my professor mentioned: There's no such thing as free lunch. Every time I am going to do something that involves time and obtaining something, I think, "There's no such thing as free lunch." I'm 22, and I've been subconsciously referring to it on a daily basis for over 5 years. I don't think MBTI will have the same effect, but that's because I was able to catch myself before it became an absolute when in fact it's pseudo-science.

 

[ladyhaha]

I wanted my current boyfriend to get into MBTI but he said he rather not, as you start subconsciously basing everything you do on 4 letters. He was right.

He actually began to tell me, "Idk about this MBTI, but you are acting quite odd nowadays." I was, and I think it's because I was way more in my head trying to make a connection between my behaviors and said traits I was suppose to have.

My experience with MBTI has been more disappointing than anything. And it's because I wanted to find a niche where I felt I at last fit into, but it just worsened the gap between me and people in general. I am not about to try to see the positive either. I see things for what they are. And most of them have been negatives.

Imo, I don't think you should introduce him to MBTI. I say just date him and be happy and let behaviors arise naturally without connecting them to 4 letters, as my boyfriend says.

MBTI has sorta subconsciously altered my mind; I'm the midst of deprogramming myself. It kinda reminds me of my AP Microeconomics class in high school, when my professor mentioned: There's no such thing as free lunch. Every time I am going to do something that involves time and obtaining something, I think, "There's no such thing as free lunch." I'm 22, and I've been subconsciously referring to it on a daily basis for over 5 years. I don't think MBTI will have the same effect, but that's because I was able to catch myself before it became an absolute when in fact it's pseudo-science.

Wow, this was really well said. Thank you, Moon_Child and everyone really for your responses.

I've decided not to share MBTI with him at this point - it may have already served it's purpose for our relationship. It's helped me to understand just how many different ways people understand love and life and how they plan for it. I've learned to better address my needs and concerns and not expect him to mindread.

I do think he'd get a kick out of a lot of this stuff... there's still threads I might show him that might make feel less alone and doubt himself less...

 

[CosmicJalapeno]

I say tell him the basic concepts of the system and let him decide for himself. There is potential to learn from this and I feel by not telling him you might be doing him a disservice in regards to him better understanding himself. This system has helped me a lot when it comes to how my mind works and has helped me realize more why people are the way they are.

I dislike one liners of pseudo-wisdom but...

Knowledge is power.

 

[2fast4u2]

I'm dating a guy who I'm 95% positive is an INTP. I'd like to introduce him to MBTI, but I wonder if it might do more harm than good. Thoughts?

I hesitate in sharing MBTI with many people but it seems INTP's really dive into it. Any recommended articles or profiles to get him started? A lot of these profiles paint you guys as heartless mega-nerds which I can get downright defensive about.

My wife is an enfj, a real rockstar in her world, your avi is so typical lol but I think its hot.., really neat relationship, and 10 years strong so yeah... If he is an intp, he would accept the notion if he has any questions about himself that could be answered by the mbti and well, us... He would relish the info if anything and free time to sit in front of a pc when his ENFJ girlfriend is busy watching reality tv?? cmon.. just show him lol...

 

[kingdavidANC]

Cherish the time you have together. The moment you introduce him to MBTI, he's going to use his sponge absorbing trait to hoard all the types, map out cause and effect and attempt to 'figure' you out. As a result, he'll be second guessing everything and you'll get angry at him over nothing because he'll be being him.

Sorry, cynicism at work here. You're more than welcome to take your chances. I'm just tossing this scenario out there for consideration.

This sounds like my response to it. Very accurate.

 

[RoSoDude]

Wow, this was really well said. Thank you, Moon_Child and everyone really for your responses.

I've decided not to share MBTI with him at this point - it may have already served it's purpose for our relationship. It's helped me to understand just how many different ways people understand love and life and how they plan for it. I've learned to better address my needs and concerns and not expect him to mindread.

I do think he'd get a kick out of a lot of this stuff... there's still threads I might show him that might make feel less alone and doubt himself less...

I'm one of the people who has had some of the issues that people have brought up (trying to "figure" everyone out and such), but it is pretty engaging and I've found that I'm in the camp of people that finds it to do more good than harm. While I have some friends that feel cloistered and restricted by these types, I rather think they open up new possibilities; 16 worlds of the, in fact. Before I really thought about this stuff, I sort of saw everyone on the same spectrum of personality, as sort of vague blobs of being. With knowledge of the functions (oh, make sure you do it based on the functions, the MBTI dichotomies are really quite useless), I've found that there are so many types of people, so many endless possibilities within each type, for development and growth and how people deal with what they have.

I also agree that it could be good for him to find out what he is and find people like him, to some degree. Not people exactly the same, but people who really take in the world in the same way; reading some of those descriptions can be eerily accurate, especially if they're less general and actually focus on the nature of the type. I was happy to find that I was somewhat unique, but also that there were people like me, and there were reasons for some of the things I did, and some of the doubt and negative feelings I had. It can be comforting in that way.

You sound like you're very caring and great to him, by the way, I wish you luck! :]

 

[crazyeddie]

Sometimes I think typology is a conspiracy executed by INTPs. They made the whole thing up so they'd have an excuse to spend hours reading bad prose about 'cognitive functions' on the internet when they were supposed to be filling out forms and doing homework.

How's the homework coming, btw?

 

[crazyeddie]

Wow, this was really well said. Thank you, Moon_Child and everyone really for your responses.

I've decided not to share MBTI with him at this point - it may have already served it's purpose for our relationship. It's helped me to understand just how many different ways people understand love and life and how they plan for it. I've learned to better address my needs and concerns and not expect him to mindread.

I do think he'd get a kick out of a lot of this stuff... there's still threads I might show him that might make feel less alone and doubt himself less...

I do think he'd benefit from it INTPs are a rare breed, and MBTI explains a lot about why we are they way we are. I would say you might want to get your fill of a pre-MBTI INTP first, though. And, I would second the intp.org "detailed" profile as the best of the best. Damn thing pegged my musical tastes! O.O A *lot* of stuff in there made me go, "Wow, that's an INTP thing? I thought that was a *me* thing!" Even though I've known about MBTI for years and years.

Either way, go ENFJ the crap out of the lucky bastard

 

[nadjasix]

How's the homework coming, btw?

Heh. I don't know enough about this field to know whether this fake "grant proposal" I'm writing is any good.

I already received this particular grant and I've written hundreds of grants in my lifetime so it feels redundant to do this for practice.

Thanks for checking though :dry::bored:

 

[crazyeddie]

Heh. I don't know enough about this field to know whether this fake "grant proposal" I'm writing is any good.

I already received this particular grant and I've written hundreds of grants in my lifetime so it feels redundant to do this for practice.

Thanks for checking though :dry::bored:

Ouch... having to do a homework assignment on something you've done for a living? That's *gotta* suck...

 

[nadjasix]

Ouch... having to do a homework assignment on something you've done for a living? That's *gotta* suck...

Yes. Yes it does.

It's especially annoying because - this is going to sound arrogant, but - I don't know how to write bad grant proposals. The rest of the students were given a rewrite. I would never be able to hand in something that needs serious revision. Maybe for another assignment, but not this one. This means that I've already spent far too much time on it, compared to my classmates, who maybe spent an hour cutting and pasting from wikipedia.