Hi, long time lurker here. I've been trying to avoid posting this question on hopes that I could figure out my type by myself. So far I've manage to narrow down 2 functions which are Fi and Te, however the rest I am unsure of beyond being an N of some sort. Perhaps I should state that I am unaware of the impression I give off, so I have taken the time to ask around. One co-worker said I am - Witty, charming, assertive, easy to talk to, opinionated, laidback, could make a very sensitive person cry. On hopes of determining if I was a planner she told me no, that I was more of a plotter than a planner. Honestly I don't understand the difference. Even more confusing is how can I be a cold, hard ass, NTJ yet be laidback, I just don't get it.
Not sure if this will play a factor but she did say that if I don't talk to her she would of never known that I was at work. This is a part time job that I hate, so can't really say I would take lead or have any ambitious to move up in position. I question my introversion due to my rough upbringing and being a misanthrope. Most of my childhood and early teenage years I was forced to stay inside and never go out and about. Could never join any sports nor visit any friends. Also I didn't have internet nor a computer, so given this situation an extrovert would think they might be an introvert.
Thinking I was an introvert until I became friends with an INTJ online. When we talked on the phone my INTJ friend was shocked at my voice, thinking that I would be more quiet, monotonic, or something of that nature. Now I am definitely not loud at least compare to my ENTP room mate. But I am definitely not robotic in terms of talking like some INTJ videos on youtube. My understanding of Introversion and Extroversion is how one gets their energy. It's hard for me to really say, but just yesterday I was out with some friends, we went to the mall, bookstore and movie theater. Not once did I feel tire, or drained, in fact I felt more silly and lively when in the presence of my friends. Now had my friends not been they I can't say if I would of been this way.
Another thing I ought to mention which is surprises me is my friends are rather shocked that I have a soft side. When speaking about my depression and how sometimes I feel so sad and angry that I do cry but only alone with no one around. They are shocked that I could ever feel or be this way. I am quite ambitious, if there is something I want I will work hard to obtain it. With this said I have not been successful in my plans nor goals but I haven't given up. Maybe the fact I haven't been successful yet would imply I am not a J?
When I think of INTJ the imagine of a scientist, master planner comes to mind. With ENTJ an executive, who reach a position to lead or command his peers, the general. I am neither of these but I am also young too. I don't want to control people, in fact I don't really care for groups. I just want to pursue my dreams and make them reality. Things would be much easier to determine my type if I had a better understanding of Ni. All the things I've read about it, I just don't get it. I hear from some people that Ni is vision, well ok I do have a vision of where I want to be but it the Ni definition goes further. Ni users have this vision plan out in details, their vision is so well explained. I don't have that, sure I have an idea of where I want to be, what I want to do but not that far in detail.
I don't know what I'll be doing a month from now. Many say Ni is "just knowing" I don't have such moments, at least not frequently. One more thing and I have no idea if this relates to type but I enjoy playing cards (Poker and TCG to be exact). Which I am quite good at.
Edit: Things that could relate to ENFP
I have a hard time following through with things. For example I rarely post on forums but I often lurk, I often start up things but hardly stay track and finish cause something comes up to prevent me from succeeding. I subscribed to the NY Times, yet I don't read the emails all the time. I plan out something like my new diet and workout yet I don't follow through. I try to teach myself korean with videos, and some stuff I downloaded but I gave up once I learned I couldn't learn it this way. Maybe it's just these particular instances or a lack of discipline.
Another thing I don't like being order around or told to do something. I will automatically resist and often I ask why I am being told to do something. But this might be due to Fi, I value respect and if you are ordering someone around you aren't respecting them. I don't come off as bossy or aggressive, but I don't let people walk over me. I am one of the few men out their who believes in chivalry and I do enjoy some romantic films, poetry. Also for some strange reason I love sad and violent music but not a mixture of the two.