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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have done a couple of Enneagram tests and the two results that pop up are
Type 3w2
or
Type 8


I am wondering which one is more me...

- I am determined to succeed and I rarely fail.
- I am confident but not boastful.
- I like to be independent.
- I like helping others to the best of my ability.
- I find that some of my friends feel like they're inferior to me to the extent that they wonder why I bother talking to them.
- I love listening to peoples problems and giving advice.
- I go out of my way to help my friends
- I believe in loyalty and respect.
- Sometimes I think I help others more than I do myself.
- I know my limits.
- I am unwavering in my beliefs but I do not feel the need to domineer.
- I am often chosen as a leader in a group because I listen to all opinions.
- I am decisive but open to suggestions.
- I can be aggressive when I am angry but I tend to walk away or bottle up.
- I love having freedom.
- I insist on doing things on my own and being independent.
- I do not like being viewed as weak.
- I don't seek to be powerful or standout but I find in many circumstances I am given the opportunity to lead by others anyway.
- I do not seek anything in return when helping others.
- I am self motivated.
- I insist that people express themselves even if I may disagree with their opinion.
- I have a bit of an ego.
- I don't like conforming, I strive to do what I want and not what others want.
- I care a lot about how people view me.
- I strive to be the best I can be and can be a little hard on myself.
- I don't miss my friends and family even though I love them and have many friends.
- I can't express my true emotions easily unless I trust someone a lot.
 

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Hi Zero-

Well, Threes and Eights are a fairly common mistype- all though they are alike on a superficial levels, what motivates them is really different. Your description was thorough, but all the things you listed were more of the positive things about yourself. It might be easier for you to type yourself, (and us to help you with that) if you tell us a little of your weaknesses. That having been said, that particular trait (of wanting to show your best to others) is a very Three-ish thing to do. :wink: (if I do say so myself)

Also, it's more likely for a Three to think they may be an Eight than vice versa. Here's what the Ennegram Institute says about the differences between those two types:



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Despite some superficial similarities, the differences are profound: Eights are leaders, deal makers, and power brokers who want to make the world conform to their personal vision. They want to have a large impact, to build and accomplish great things, possibly something that will live as a testament to the greatness of their audacity and will. Strong and implacable, they can be ruthless when something or someone gets in their way. They have large egos, and achieving some form of glory is important to them. Money is both a form of power and a means to amass more of it. Achieving personal power is the dominating drive in Eights, and there is nothing ambiguous, much less furtive or duplicitous, about them.
By contrast, power is not the key motive of Threes; achieving success and prestige and basking in the admiring attention of others is. (By contrast, Eights do not care about popularity; they do not care about the goodwill of others, so long as they get their way.) If Eights are natural leaders, Threes are natural managers and technicians. If Eights do not fear failure as such, Threes fear failure deeply because they see it as a personal humiliation, a potential occasion for being rejected, their deepest fear. By contrast, Eights see failure as an opportunity to learn something and come back stronger. If Eights are too busy achieving their purposes to worry about public opinion, Threes live and die on the opinions of others and desperately want to be in demand socially. If average Eights are combative and intimidating and can "take the heat", despite a certain bravado, average Threes will back down or be driven to deviousness: they cannot take pressure for long or exposure for a moment. In short, even average Eights are the "genuine article," whereas average Threes are an imitation of it.
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Hope that helps!
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I am still kinda caught up in the debate... I find I am not really materialistic and not as "power driven" but then again I do
want to have a large impact, to build and accomplish great things, possibly something that will live as a testament to the greatness of their audacity and will. Strong and implacable, they can be ruthless when something or someone gets in their way. They have large egos, and achieving some form of glory is important to them.
...

I can think of a few times where people have tried to push me down and say I can't achieve my goal and I have just ignored them and worked as hard as I can just to show them up and take revenge...

but then again if you say that it is common for some threes to see themselves as 8's maybe I am just a three...
I'll ponder and get back to you... hahaha
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Hi Zero-
Your description was thorough, but all the things you listed were more of the positive things about yourself.
Hope that helps!
Hmm see sometimes what I think of me as a weakness isn't to others...

i find that
- I can be aggressive when I am angry but I tend to walk away or bottle up.
I find this is a downside... I have walked away from argument but I have (in the past) been really psycho and just punched a wall etc... I laugh about it now but seriously.. hahaha I have a life long injury now.

- I do not like being viewed as weak.
doesn't allow me to open up to people...

- I strive to be the best I can be and can be a little hard on myself.
Maybe the wording was a bit off but I can get really bogged down because I haven't necessarily failed to everyone else but I have high self expectations...

- I don't miss my friends and family even though I love them and have many friends.
I find that I should miss them but I don't have that emotion... and sometimes it is weird because soemone will say they miss me and I dont miss them.

- I can't express my true emotions easily unless I trust someone a lot.
I only trust a couple of people... and they aren't my usual friends so it is weird because I can't even talk about serious things to my own friends because they probs don't care because they're always "happy"...
 

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Hmmm... you're a tough one. I relate to a lot of what you say- I too feel like people "miss" me more than I do them. It's not something I like about myself. I feel a little cold-hearted at times. Maybe a few real life comparisons:

My husband is an Eight, and we both have that (not as emotionally needy as others). The difference is, I hide my lack of emotional neediness- especially as a woman- you're "supposed" to be more emotional and connected to people. The fact that I'm not that way as much as other people isn't something I like people to be aware of. So I don't show it- I'm careful to always show my best to others. Whereas my husband, the Eight, is much more direct and open about how he feels. He doesn't fake it. Ever. And owns his feelings more than me.

I also find that when I'm upset it takes me a while to even realize it- I compartmentalize my feelings way to efficiently. To the point where I don't know they exist- if I'm not careful. Whereas he is more aware of his feelings, and lets them out when needed. The only feeling he ever suppressed is anger- and only if he feels like the people around him can't "handle it". Know what I mean?

And all though we don't need a lot of people in our life, we are extremely reliant on each other. Everyone else is optional, to be quite honest. (not that I'd tell any of them that) :wink:

Also, the expectation part is very Three-ish- I have crazy high expectations for myself- whereas my husband is more of a realist about what he can or can't do. he still accomplishes a lot (I couldn't be with a slacker. I'm just sayin'...haha I'd never say this to anyone IRL-it's kinda funny...) anyway, he still does a lot, but he isn't nearly as hard on himself as I am.

Hope that helps- if you're still not sure, then describe how you get when you are under stress- that can help figure out type.
 

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I browsed among some of your posts, for some insight.

8s give off a more raw vibe in text or speaking, they also have a way of speaking "at" people as opposed to talking with them.

3s are little more smooth lil' more creamy cool, life is a "game" and they are shooting for the highest level.

The way you speak is a little more reactive, which is more 3ish (the way you respond to posts). You play off others well and are usually well received for it.

I carry myself in a manner which (usually) keeps people from having anything negative to say about me, it is an image control which is a token characteristic of a 3. The ability to appear proper and excellent to others, which you seem to be doing as well "- I find that some of my friends feel like they're inferior to me to the extent that they wonder why I bother talking to them.".

3w2s are less likely to openly boast, I find they let their accomplishments into conversations in a discreet manner. Slowly imposing yourself on others while exuding a face of pure authenticity.

With emotions, I find they get in the way and they slow down my climb to the top. I don't make strong connections with those around me, because I project an image and less authenticity. It's part of the "game"

I've noticed you have a hate for "fake" people. What's funny is that I dislike fake people too, but that would be extremely hypocritical of me. I've found that because I can fake well, I can spot others even better. It's an ability to sniff out bullshit, because of the close proxy to bullshit.

I'd say a def 3w2.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
I feel a little cold-hearted at times.
Yeah I think it is good because I don't get hurt so much when people come and go...
I just think it is a negative because my friends always say "I miss you" etc etc. but I actually don't and can't lie and say I do... haha

I find that people don't know me because I am really careful as well in what I show...
I like my privacy and try and choose what side of me to show...
(I don't lie. I guess you could say there is the truth... and there is the silent truth. Both are true)

the expectation part is very Three-ish- I have crazy high expectations for myself
I find that my expectations are very realistic and obtainable... Its just the small things like if I forget something, I am hard on myself because I know that I only had to be a little more organised or put that extra hour in to prepare myself I could've gotten there... something like that. Usually it is my smaller goals that I get bogged down on because I expect them to be easier to obtain. Others like getting into a University (for instance) I don't find I get disappointed because I didn't get my hopes up, I was just determined so I haven't gotten that attachment or what ever.

I find that I am very weird when it comes to stress because I don't think I ever say that word to people.
I always feel "overwhelmed" but I know I seem to not like admitting I am "stressed out"... it's weird.
I don't get "stressed out" when it comes to academic tests, driving tests, Karate gradings or job / uni interviews etc.

When I do get "stressed" I become very introverted and aggressive. I try to hold it in but I am usually on a pretty short fuse. I don't fake being happy ( and am usually just blank ). If things are really stressful and I might crack and shatter but then after I have done that I actually get back to doing what I was doing... Its like I have had my 10 mins of going crazy and possibly falling apart and then when that's over I can get back and finish what I need to do. Also, sometimes I just want to give up, but I never do. I literally can't. I dunno if it is because I have to much "pride" in myself or I don't want to seem weak in my own eyes or I don't want to be a quitter etc. but I can't give up and it is good to some extent (so I am told) but it really pisses me off because I still have the need to try my hardest (which probably makes me more stressed) ... :dry:

hahhaaa. Sometimes I get really "stressed" when I think of the things in my life that are catch-22's.
 

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3s are little more smooth lil' more creamy cool, life is a "game" and they are shooting for the highest level.
That's going to be my new tagline. Awesome.

What's funny is that I dislike fake people too, but that would be extremely hypocritical of me. I've found that because I can fake well, I can spot others even better. It's an ability to sniff out bullshit, because of the close proxy to bullshit.
Ditto. It's amazing the radar I have for fakeness in contrast to my amazing skills at being fake if I choose to.

I'd say a def 3w2.
I think so too.
 

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Yeah I think it is good because I don't get hurt so much when people come and go...
I just think it is a negative because my friends always say "I miss you" etc etc. but I actually don't and can't lie and say I do... haha

I find that people don't know me because I am really careful as well in what I show...
I like my privacy and try and choose what side of me to show...
(I don't lie. I guess you could say there is the truth... and there is the silent truth. Both are true)


I find that my expectations are very realistic and obtainable... Its just the small things like if I forget something, I am hard on myself because I know that I only had to be a little more organised or put that extra hour in to prepare myself I could've gotten there... something like that. Usually it is my smaller goals that I get bogged down on because I expect them to be easier to obtain. Others like getting into a University (for instance) I don't find I get disappointed because I didn't get my hopes up, I was just determined so I haven't gotten that attachment or what ever.

I find that I am very weird when it comes to stress because I don't think I ever say that word to people.
I always feel "overwhelmed" but I know I seem to not like admitting I am "stressed out"... it's weird.
I don't get "stressed out" when it comes to academic tests, driving tests, Karate gradings or job / uni interviews etc.

When I do get "stressed" I become very introverted and aggressive. I try to hold it in but I am usually on a pretty short fuse. I don't fake being happy ( and am usually just blank ). If things are really stressful and I might crack and shatter but then after I have done that I actually get back to doing what I was doing... Its like I have had my 10 mins of going crazy and possibly falling apart and then when that's over I can get back and finish what I need to do. Also, sometimes I just want to give up, but I never do. I literally can't. I dunno if it is because I have to much "pride" in myself or I don't want to seem weak in my own eyes or I don't want to be a quitter etc. but I can't give up and it is good to some extent (so I am told) but it really pisses me off because I still have the need to try my hardest (which probably makes me more stressed) ... :dry:

hahhaaa. Sometimes I get really "stressed" when I think of the things in my life that are catch-22's.
You articulate yourself very well. I find that a lot of what you say resonates with me too. I'd definitely agree with Scruffy that you seem to be a Three. What do you think?
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I browsed among some of your posts, for some insight.
3w2s are less likely to openly boast, I find they let their accomplishments into conversations in a discreet manner. Slowly imposing yourself on others while exuding a face of pure authenticity.

With emotions, I find they get in the way and they slow down my climb to the top. I don't make strong connections with those around me, because I project an image and less authenticity. It's part of the "game"

I've noticed you have a hate for "fake" people. What's funny is that I dislike fake people too, but that would be extremely hypocritical of me. I've found that because I can fake well, I can spot others even better. It's an ability to sniff out bullshit, because of the close proxy to bullshit.

I'd say a def 3w2.
Hahahahaa Yes. I do boast occassionally, but only a tad, because I don't like people who just go on and on and on about it because I consider that fishing.

I do "impose" myself on others subtly but I guess in the end they don't notice. I guess I suggest it and then they kind of agree and run with it and it seems like it was their choice. Not sure. :wink:

Sometimes I feel like my life is a catch-22 and I try to be "true" (non-hypocritical) because I hate fakers and fishers (people who always fish for compliments etc etc). I am always questioning which is the true me, the way people see me or the way I see myself. I have this concept where I think of myself as a "player" or "joker" but I am totally not sure if it is me or just my persona... hahaha but meh. My brain starts to hurt if I think about it... it's too confusing.

It's a done deal then.
Anyway, I think after all this, yes, I shall claim a 3w2.
Thank you Rena and Scruffy.

3s are little more smooth lil' more creamy cool, life is a "game" and they are shooting for the highest level.
Okay that pretty much is what I think. Sometimes I feel like my life is a game or a movie. It's weird.
 
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