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Not limited to confidence in the formation of relationships but overall levels of feeling empowered and self-assured. In relationships, where is the line drawn between confidence (attractive) and too much confidence (attractive?... By definition, overly-anything is unattractive) and pure arrogance?

Share any thoughts at all! Even if they're not on topic ;)
 

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I am confident.
I am arrogant.

Many find me unattractive, but those who have the confidence to stand beside me I find oh so beautiful.

Get far enough up Piaget's, Kegan's or Maslow's hierarchies and you find self assurance a good thing.

The test is can you laugh at yourself, and how willing are you to examining your fallacies and short comings. It is oh so easy to be confident and wrong, and are you willing to admit it.
 

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Meh.

lf l had to polarize my choices between an arrogant and clingy pathology, l would not ever be attracted to the clingy person. Can't do it, will run away. All the way away, forever and ever and never come back. Ever.

Cannot respond to it. Does not compute.

That said, l've never dated a real asshole and l wouldn't but l find a very slight, subtly arrogant self-assurance to be much easier to communicate with.

A Curious Sort of Sass, installment No. 3
 
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I am not interested in anyone who has an unrealistic or delusional view of themselves. If you shouldn't be confident, you shouldn't be confident.
 

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Not limited to confidence in the formation of relationships but overall levels of feeling empowered and self-assured. In relationships, where is the line drawn between confidence (attractive) and too much confidence (attractive?... By definition, overly-anything is unattractive) and pure arrogance?
Share any thoughts at all! Even if they're not on topic ;)
yes. when you believe you can do things that are not humanly possible or just into dangerous situations without adequate preparation.
this clip is a perfect example
 

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I don't think it's possible to be too confident. Part of that is because I attribute many different things to confidence, such as humility and the ability to gauge one's own limitations.

There is too much of being a prick though... and of being a dumbass...
 

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Meh.

lf l had to polarize my choices between an arrogant and clingy pathology, l would not ever be attracted to the clingy person. Can't do it, will run away. All the way away, forever and ever and never come back. Ever.

Cannot respond to it. Does not compute.

That said, l've never dated a real asshole and l wouldn't but l find a very slight, subtly arrogant self-assurance to be much easier to communicate with.

A Curious Sort of Sass, installment No. 3
James Spader crush over here huh?
 

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i think i've recently discovered that as well as arrogance, complacency is also overconfidence. just because you've been confident, and are confident inside, doesn't mean that you are currently outwardly confident. confidence is a bit like a muscle, if you haven't exercised it in a while it goes away, and that's when you can get complacent if you don't realise you need to work on it again.
 

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Well it's arrogance when you don't respect people/things around you. You can have a lot of confidence and if you pair it up with respect you won't be seen as arrogant. Also you shouldn't really be confident in things you're not really good at. That's just lying to yourself. Be confident in what you know.
 

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Yes of course there is such a thing as being narcissistic or arrogant.
 

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Not limited to confidence in the formation of relationships but overall levels of feeling empowered and self-assured. In relationships, where is the line drawn between confidence (attractive) and too much confidence (attractive?... By definition, overly-anything is unattractive) and pure arrogance?

Share any thoughts at all! Even if they're not on topic ;)
No, I don't think it is possible to be too confident. Cockiness is a different thing entirely. Confidence is measuring yourself against yourself, valuing who you are and wanting to be the best that you can be.

Narcissism is measuring yourself against others and deluding yourself, that you are somehow superior to them. That is just as much a delusion as comparing yourselves to others and feeling "inferior" to them.

All my life, I used to have this same fear; that if I ever dared to feel good about myself; I would somehow magically morph into this obnoxious, callous, asshole. But, I found that the more I like and value myself; the more I compassionate I can be about others. Self-compassion leads to compassion in general. If you can be both compassionate to others and value yourself highly; than there is no limit, to how highly one can regard oneself.
 
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Yes of course there is such a thing as being narcissistic or arrogant.
confidence, narcissism, and arrogance are 3 different things.
 
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if it's genuine, then no. that's like asking, "you can ever be too much 'yourself'?". there will be people who don't like you for it, or will read something negative into your actions--but you can just take their insecurities off your shoulders and hand 'em back.

i'm confident when i feel centered, and it really has nothing to do with me consciously--as in, it has nothing to do with my achievements or what the people around me think, but has everything to do with just slowing down enough so that my surroundings slow down in turn, and become clearer, and i can just feel myself in that moment.

it's in those times that will and direction become second nature.
 

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confidence, narcissism, and arrogance are 3 different things.
2 (!!!!!!! :wink:). Narcissism and arrogance, tend to go hand in hand; where as true confidence is antithetical to arrogance and narcissism. While is certainly possible for other people, to confuse confidence with arrogance; that doesn't mean that there is any correlation between them. Arrogance predisposes as disdain for others which is how a narcissist would view people. Narcissism always includes arrogance, but arrogance doesn't necessarily involve narcissism.
 
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I would have to question if the 'overconfidence' has been justly earned via reputation expectations or actual achievement, how much they actually know, their ability to actually deliver promises, what they can do and how capable they are of acknowledging faults or mistakes made, plus how whether or not see others as inferiors.
 

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Of course it is. Aside from arrogance and narcissism. You can be so confident in yourself it leads to delusion. I can be watching pro bull fighters and tell my self hey I can totally do that, and then die.

But I would totally deserve it.
 
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