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This is an anecdote that occured recently, and while I am not entirely sure which functions are at play here, I would assume it to be Fi.

Some background information: The last days of summer I had been busy spending my time to study for an upcoming course in Medicine, and have been amassing quite a sum of money over the Summer break. Regardless, my boss called me in for a part time job which I didn't really care for, but I still saw the benefit of adding a bit of money and saw the benefit of leaving the house.

I already knew which partners I would be working with, and I had sort of made a 'plan' in my head how I should proceed to make the best out of the day. However, when I arrived one of my "partners", who I believe is an ISFJ, made a subtle insult openly to my boss, reason being that she didn't like me. I picked up on it and decided to sort of bully her the rest of the day, because I was irritated over how stupid someone could be to openly insult one of her co-workers for no reason.

So, I directed all my attention towards my other co-worker (who is an INTP) because I saw no need to actually care for her. If someone is stupid and reckless, that is their problem and I will try to avoid that person as much as possible. I actually saw it as kind of fun to put her down because she was stupid and rude.

At the end of the day my INTP-partner was very happy because we had such great conversations, partially being because I directed all my attention to him and because we had a lot in common - such as reading, fiction, studies etc. He's a nice guy and I appreciated spending time with him.

I didn't notice that my ISFJ-'partner' was looking sad even though she obviously was, and after work was done she confronted me and said she thought I was rude. I replied that she should have thought a second before slandering me to the boss and she apologized thoroughly. I still hate her over it, but fortunately I won't meet her anymore because I quit the job to concentrate on my studies.



...I would be greatly interested if someone could analyze this anecdote and tell me what functions seemed to be used.
 

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Yes, Ni. Because Ni looks for the deeper implications of situations, such as her gossiping about you. Where as she probably didn't think much of anything of it, since SJs naturally gossip obsessively, not realizing that subconsciously it's shaping their worldview, not to mention the worldviews of others who love/respect them (other SJs in particular).

This is why politics are so effective in their current state , while the N types kind of laugh about it. Because most people are SJs out there, and that sort of gossipy political banter is exactly what influences them the most. Especially if it involves fears. Tert/inf Ne is a bitch.
 

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I might be wrong, but that looks to me like tertiary Fi. I think that a Fi dom/aux would have seen the issue differently, maybe would've just gotten offended and not gone on a Te rampage. INFPs especially need to hold a really huge grudge in order to unleash their inferior Te and try to get their revenge. You seem to have seen the insult and immediately procededed to to something about it, also you did not pick up at her state of mind after work .
 

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What do you base that on? Because she openly assaulted and broke the golden Fe rule of creating harmony?
Ummmmmmm, Fe might like social harmony in the open, but behind the scenes.....esfj's are horrific gossips!!

Really Fe is about creating social uniformity and ways of conducting social interaction. How it presents itself depends entirely on the perception functions. Of course it's fairly common to want to maintain harmony in Fe dom/aux, but it's not necessitated. Most of the strongest advocates of various rights groups are NFJs with a capital Fe. The reason why they advocate is they want to have others adopt what they believe in, that is a departure from the Si norms (they use Ni perception and therefore have a unique Fe system to espouse and push). But the point being, rights groups are not trying to create harmony when they picket - they are trying to convert a former Fe system to a new and "improved" Fe system.
 

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I see Te in the anectode with the 'bullying' and openly admitting that you had been annoyed by her behavior.

I agree the Fi seems more tertiary then dominant/auxiliary. Fi-doms dislike conflict and would probably just moodily stew on something like that. Unless it built up over time, maybe months and months then something happened that was the final straw.
 

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[...] SJs naturally gossip obsessively, not realizing that subconsciously it's shaping their worldview, not to mention the worldviews of others who love/respect them (other SJs in particular).

This is why politics are so effective in their current state , while the N types kind of laugh about it. Because most people are SJs out there, and that sort of gossipy political banter is exactly what influences them the most. Especially if it involves fears. Tert/inf Ne is a bitch.
That's a very, very interesting view on why we have politcal banter! Thank you for that :smile:

Also, you look like Darren Aronofsky! http://i.imgur.com/bp25X61.jpg

Since when is ignoring a stranger "bullying"?? Especially if the person asked for it.
When giving attention to people is the norm :wink:

I'm not saying I disagree with you. When I first read "bullying", I thought to myself "oh, I must have missed something or the guy ommited something" but I realized when I read your post.

Ignoring is not bullying (although it can be very painful if everyone ignores you) but for some people that are naturally nice with others, ignoring could seem as something bad, and bullying is a nice handy word that comes into mind when we're bad on others :wink:
 

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When giving attention to people is the norm :wink:

I'm not saying I disagree with you. When I first read "bullying", I thought to myself "oh, I must have missed something or the guy ommited something" but I realized when I read your post.

Ignoring is not bullying (although it can be very painful if everyone ignores you) but for some people that are naturally nice with others, ignoring could seem as something bad, and bullying is a nice handy word that comes into mind when we're bad on others :wink:

If they ask for it, they shouldn't be surprised by your negative reaction, right? Deserved!! :tongue:

Other than that, I have the impression that both of you (excluding the INTP co-worker) don't have that much Fe :cool:
 

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I they ask for it, they shouldn't be surprised of your negative reaction, right? Deserved!! :tongue:
At this point, I don't care. If I'm ignoring someone, I've written them off.

Other than that, I have the impression that both of you (excluding the INTP co-worker) don't have that much Fe :cool:
Me not having much Fe? It's possible, but what makes you say that?
 

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Well, the person who criticized you like that, for example... In my life the Fe-doms and aux'es (including myself) would not do that because it disrupts the group harmony. They'd rather go to the boss, or, esp Fe-doms, they'd resort to gossip that would indirectly reach the boss. Or say it to the person directly, which I would rather do.
 

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Well, the person who criticized you like that, for example... In my life the Fe-doms and aux'es (including myself) would not do that because it disrupts the group harmony. They'd rather go to the boss, or, esp Fe-doms, they'd resort to gossip that would indirectly reach the boss. Or say it to the person directly, which I would rather do.
Did I say what I would do if I was in this situation? I don't remember. Well, here's what I'd do.

If someone did or said something to insult I would openly say, "hey, this is insulting because [...]". I would have spoken if someone was insulting anyone in the group. I think that the insult (or rather, the intention) is disrupting the group harmony and me point it out in the open is an attept to prevent that.

I like it when things are said right in the open. Everybody needs to hear that. That's group harmony for me.

Speaking to the person seems to me a very gentle handling of the situation, for the person themselves, but not for the group. I'm not cirisizing you, I'm not against it, and I've not decided which one is better (speaking in private to the person or in public). I think that speaking in front of everyone, but beeing jendle to the person is the best thing. It educates the group :wink:

Unless I'm in vitriolic mood, in which case, I'm gonna open the floodgates of emotional manipulation that leads to how bad their intentions are and how bad for the goup their presence is. Yeah, unhelathy stuff :tongue:

I'm interested to listen what you have to say about it - not the vitriolic flood, but what's more healthy for the group: speaking in private or in public.
 

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I think that speaking in front of everyone, but being gentle to the person is the best thing. It educates the group :wink:
Well, no matter how gentle you think you would come across, I'd still say that there are chances that the person you attempt to correct will be offended, even if ever so slightly. OK, I guess I'm only speaking for myself :D I know I would be humiliated before the group even if the correction was well meant and deserved.
 

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Ahh, I see. Even if I simply said "hey, that's a devaluing comment"?
I have to admit I don't quite get what you mean here, but I understand that you may find that the attitude I described makes very little sense. In fact, as an HSP and introvert, I am senstivite to these kinds of remarks, even if they are not expressed. Body language and vibes and stuff.
 

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miyachanfan said:
I have to admit I don't quite get what you mean here
If anyone said something I didn't like, I would state in a logical manner why I don't like it: because it's insulting, or devaluating, or anything.

miyachanfan said:
but I understand that you may find that the attitude I described makes very little sense.
No, I think it makes a lot of sense ;)
 
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