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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My dearest friend, an ISFP, is in treatment.
She said she found a psychologist she like and she trust.
And I’m happy for her.

BUT (there is always a “but”) she has already passed through a long series of life coaches, not professionist conselours, new age “doctors” (one of them also tried to kiss her without her consent…), spiritual guides and so on.

The problem is that she has quite a big problem and for years I’ve been advicing her to search for a psychologist or a psychiatric help, so I was happy at first, but then she begun to tell me some stuff I don’t understand and that doesn’t make me trust his psychologist so much

1) little thing that is bothering me: he left her his email and said to her to write to him anytime she want. This thing doesn’t seem professional to me.
2) In fact, in one of the email he wrote to her and she showed to me, he wrote in a very friendly/loving way. Speaking about the laughs they have together and other similar things..
3) He used hypnosis from the beginning with her, and talked about guide spirits to her during the hypnosis.
4) He took her to a sort of convention to meet a sort of guru
5) He adviced her to read the book I’m going to speak about.

Now… this book… My friend told me “hey! It is interesting, why don’t you read it?” So I have bought it and I am reading it.
1) it is about REINCARNATION. It says that a child, before being born, chooses his/her family and chooses it to resolve the problems he/she had in the previous life
2) it is (obviously) completely not scientific. Completely. Not a note, not a research, not a statistic, NOTHING.
3) It says that the problems of people are just 5 and that it is possible to see what’s your problem just watching your body and your face.
4) I’m not going to tell you what it says more but they are simply bullshit.

Now… what would you do? I’ve always been quite critical with my friend about her choices on who could help her in the past, and maybe this is why she has sweared me that this person is a REAL psychologist.
I’ve directly asked to her
“Is he a real psychologist this time?”
“yes”
“with a degree, and all the rest?”
“yes”

And I’ve already said to her that I don’t like the intimacy he is creating between them, should I say to her about the bullshits of that book?
Would you do that?

My friend is a very nice person, and she is very concrete and practical, and I really like her, but she is a feeler, maybe that kind of approach can be right for her? I don’t know, I would have run away at the first visit, but she seems to really appreciate this “doctor”.
 

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If he has a degree then yes, he's a real psychologist. It's another thing if the methods he is using are scientifically valid.

I am interested in both the psychological as well as the more "mystical" phenomenons such as tarot reading or theories of reincarnation, but I wouldn't even think starting to use those methods in a real psychological, degree-level therapy.

Perhaps the cards as a picture therapy as best, like the ink spot test ("What do you see in this picture?"), but nothing more.

If this ISFP-person has in turn decided to go for a "energy healer" or some other kind of "spiritual-holistic therapist" then it's her decision, but if the person has gone to a psychologist and this psychologist is starting to give the ISFP-person these kind of ideas, it may well be asked if it's ethical in the field of psychology (hint: probably not).
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 · (Edited)
hi space, I was hoping in a your answer. :kitteh:

If he has a degree then yes, he's a real psychologist. It's another thing if the methods he is using are scientifically valid.
The point is that I doubt about the degree. I could have influenced my friend with my previous critics and she could have lied to me...

I am interested in both the psychological as well as the more "mystical" phenomenons such as tarot reading or theories of reincarnation, but I wouldn't even think starting to use those methods in a real psychological, degree-level therapy.
We have talked about this things and I know your point of view and we agree that they can be points from which develope a reflection and you know that I'm open and that we agree on many points, but, believe me, the stuff that is written in that book HAS NOTHING to do with what we have talked about.
NOTHING.
If I'm talking about bullshits, believe me, they are bullshits.
Apart that it don't even proposes those ideas as a possibility but imposes it as a fact, when I read that cancer is the consequences of a mother and a father who worked out of home... No, really... you have not idea of what I'm reading... :rolleyes: :laughing:
And I'm preoccupied that a psychologist can advice a patient that already has her problem to read this kind of stuff.

Perhaps the cards as a picture therapy as best, like the ink spot test ("What do you see in this picture?"), but nothing more.

If this ISFP-person has in turn decided to go for a "energy healer" or some other kind of "spiritual-holistic therapist" then it's her decision, but if the person has gone to a psychologist and this psychologist is starting to give the ISFP-person these kind of ideas, it may well be asked if it's ethical in the field of psychology (hint: probably not).
Ok, I value very much your answer.
So, you would say her something?
Maybe not "WHAT THE FUCKING BULLSHITS YOUR PSYCHOLOGIST GAVE YOU TO READ???" but something like... like what??? it only come in to my mind the previous sentence...
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Of course I'd tell her. That man sounds like a charlatan, and who knows what more...
(maybe I'd try to conduct my personal research on the man and his methods, as well as that book, and then go up to her with some hard evidence on the BS )
I don't know his name. My friend didn't tell me it.
 

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Whether he is a certified psychologist or not, it seems to me from the information you provided that he is advancing his own views/interests/agenda and abusing his position of authority/influence. Any psychologist that isn't willing or able to remain objective and neutral is bad news in my opinion.

I would certainly share your concerns with your friend. Unfortunately, stories of psychological manipulation are all too common these days.
 

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I don't think your friend really would want to be lied to because she's a feeler. That would just make things worse, especially the idea of you withholding information because you don't want to hurt her feelings. Then that's read as lack of trust.

But I dunno, you know your friend better than a stranger does on the internet. :)
 

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Do you know the name (or the date and location) of the conference? That should provide some information on whether this is a real psychologist. From the evidence you've presented so far though, he doesn't sound very legit.
 

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1) little thing that is bothering me: he left her his email and said to her to write to him anytime she want. This thing doesn’t seem professional to me.
2) In fact, in one of the email he wrote to her and she showed to me, he wrote in a very friendly/loving way. Speaking about the laughs they have together and other similar things..
I'm not sure that's a problem, it could be part of the therapy. It could be ok.

3) He used hypnosis from the beginning with her, and talked about guide spirits to her during the hypnosis.
4) He took her to a sort of convention to meet a sort of guru
5) He adviced her to read the book I’m going to speak about.
This is very strange instead. Is there any way you can discreetly check this person's professional position without making it too obvious to your friend?
 

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What I'd question is, is she benefiting from looking at life from a different angle?
Is her attitude to life generally better?

Could it be by going to all the same ones is a bit like the definition of stupidity?
Rather than questioning the psychologists philosophies.

Look at your friend, does she smile and laugh more?
If she does then perhaps be glad for her.

The philosophies you speak of, reincarnation and such, Buddhist or Tao or whatever eastern in general belief system it is, has a very different approach to general life problems and for some, it makes much more sense out of the senseless, better than any of the other ways of looking at what goes bump in the journey of life.

So how about watching how she reacts? And decide by that, how successful this psychologist is, or not.
Yeah?
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I'm not sure that's a problem, it could be part of the therapy. It could be ok.



This is very strange instead. Is there any way you can discreetly check this person's professional position without making it too obvious to your friend?
unfortunately no.
She lives quite far from me (not so far, 1 hour by train or 2 by car, but far enough) and so is her psychologist.
I could try to search for him on the psychologists register (it is online), but I don't know his name. She didn't tell me.
I can try to ask her without being too direct.
 

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That's very suspicious to say the least. How has she checked his degree? Did she ask him?

To be honest, I wouldn't trust most of what she says since she's been listening to his steamy, brown bullshit for so long. You need to go there and ask him why the methods work yourself.

AN INTP IS PERFECT FOR THAT JOB!

I mean, if you being an INTP can't find out how much he's bullshitting, your friend is fucked. If you do feel some sense of obligation, try meeting him once and asking about the methods.

The e-mails could be normal, I wouldn't be too suspicious that a psychologists isn't being cold and professional in his e-mails to a patient. The superstitious stuff is where I smelled BS.
 

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I work with psychiatrists. I can tell you that emailing with clients is completely normal and usually preferred to something like voice-mails. Of course, writing something warm and intimate isn't, but a psychologist might be more inclined to do that. Is it acceptable? I would say no, better to err on the side of professionalism.

As far as the more mystical approach he's taking, I'm afraid it's actually a thing. In my college years, a few of the psych classes I took had a focus on some of the more mystical approaches to therapy. Do a search for Integral Psychology and you'll see what I mean.

Still though, I would recommend to your friend not to continue seeing this psychologist. I personally don't agree with the "mystical" approach to therapy, and it sounds like this psychologist is a bit risky to begin with.
 

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Any idiot can get a degree. Its not a measure of competence or intelligence, just the ability to write papers and go to lectures.

The person you mention sounds like a moron. I would advise you get your friend to realize that or just let her make more mistakes until she realizes it for herself.
 

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hi space, I was hoping in a your answer. :kitteh:



The point is that I doubt about the degree. I could have influenced my friend with my previous critics and she could have lied to me...



We have talked about this things and I know your point of view and we agree that they can be points from which develope a reflection and you know that I'm open and that we agree on many points, but, believe me, the stuff that is written in that book HAS NOTHING to do with what we have talked about.
NOTHING.
If I'm talking about bullshits, believe me, they are bullshits.
Apart that it don't even proposes those ideas as a possibility but imposes it as a fact, when I read that cancer is the consequences of a mother and a father who worked out of home... No, really... you have not idea of what I'm reading... :rolleyes: :laughing:
And I'm preoccupied that a psychologist can advice a patient that already has her problem to read this kind of stuff.



Ok, I value very much your answer.
So, you would say her something?
Maybe not "WHAT THE FUCKING BULLSHITS YOUR PSYCHOLOGIST GAVE YOU TO READ???" but something like... like what??? it only come in to my mind the previous sentence...


With a few clicks I found this:

Spiritual Psychotherapy (SP) | Transformational Arts College of Spiritual and Holistic Training

He might very well be a spiritual psychotherapist, with the spiritual aspect based on Buddhism.

Is this friend of yours religious or is she an atheist or an agnosthic?

Sometimes it's better for a religious person to go see a professional who's versed in the spiritual aspect of an human.


However, if the person doesn't really believe in God, it's a more complicated thing.. This spiritual psychology could wery well end with her turning to become a Buddhist, when taking account the emotionally vulrenable situation she's in.

If you are worried about her, I definitely suggest you talk to her, tell her how you are feeling and ask how she feels about the therapy.

If she tells you it's fine and she really is happy with the therapy, then.. Well, I can't really say. There's not very much you can do about it, even if you would want to turn her mind to go and see another psychologist with a more neutral background.. :/




But I do understand. I've kind of been in the same situation as you.



A close friend of mine once suffered of psychosis and ended to a hospital.

He recovered, and around a year later he went for an alpha course from his friend's suggestion.

An alpha course is a course where one attends to conversations relating to different aspects of Christianity, faith and God.


Before the course, he was always kind of on neutral ground with religion, though his parents were religious.


After the alpha course he and his friend turned to faith and became Baptists.


I was very worried of this, both for him and myself.

I thought if he would turn to a person I don't recognize anymore, a close minded religious lunatic, and if he would actually abandon me because I don't really believe in God.

Though his deep faith does irritate me at times (he often starts talking about the Bible and quotes different verses from it), I can still recognize the original person behind the religious mask. He's still the same person I've known for all these years.

But of course there are some things which I find saddening. For example he was before very neutral towards gay people, but he now despises them and says they are sinners.. So turning to faith can really change a person's attitude, both to positive and negative..


But in the end, he's found many friends (and in the end his girlfriend too) from the religious social circles.

So if I know he's happy with this new life of his.. I guess I'm happy too, then..




I don't know what will happen with this friend of yours, all possibilities are open.

Hopefully it will end with the best possible outcome, she recovering and continuing on in life, happier and healthier than before.
 
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