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As with many INFPs, I'm prone to melancholia.
One of the issues for me is the whole "living in the future" thing. It's good for introspection and planning for self improvement, but sometimes, I fantasise about ideal scenarios which I know are unrealistic. But it causes me to have expectations for how things should be anyhow.
So when reality doesn't meet my imagination, be it due to circumstance or my own laziness, it leads to to the worst kind of sadness - disappointment.
Before I went travelling, I had my doubts about whether or not I'd enjoy it. I thought about my shyness and lack of people skills and thinking "what if it this ends up being the most uncomfortable endeavour I've had to endure?"
To my surprise, once I reached my destination all my worries faded away.
Firstly, I became incredibly proactive in doing everything. Usually I am seriously disorganised and I am not a person that can be held accountable for things going to plan. However, I turned out to be the one person in my group that was looking up hostels and places to visit. I organised busses and flights and I was meticulous in keeping my belongings together and organised.
Basically, I became a "J" which, in a way, is how I've always wanted to be. But I was too comfortable being lazy.
But most importantly, I stopped thinking about unrealistic ideals for the future and I didn't dwell in the past either. I was surrounded by an entirely different culture and it was as though I was permanently content with everything. I was inspired. I could've been staring at a wall while I was over there and I would have been happy. In many ways it was puzzling, I had never felt like I was living in the present as I had then. A truly incredible experience. Being happy was effortless and it continued for long stretches of time.
The most surprising thing of all, was the fact that I became outgoing. I was striking up conversations with other travellers and it was an incredible feeling. I think part of the reason was when you're travelling, small talk isn't so small. The usual questions like "what do you do?" or "what have you been up to" that generally inspire mundane answers are replaced with interesting conversation.
All you have to ask is "where are you from?" or "what brought you here?" or "where are you going next?" and already you have a solid basis for an interesting conversation - because you're meeting travellers who are all doing things they want to do. They're not weighed down by thoughts about work or any other crap that follows everyday life, so they're more willing to talk about their passion or what excites them. The things that matter.
And when you meet locals, it's instantly engaging because you're experiencing their culture. What's normal for them is alien to you and vise versa. And comparing the differences between your cultures can be an interesting and hilarious conversation in itself.
Basically, when I was travelling I became the person I wanted to be. And I learned that I was capable of doing things that I could only dream of in the past. Ultimately, it opened me up. After I got back, I was more tolerant of the things that used to bother me, and I found myself pushing to make some of those unrealistic ideals become a reality. It has made me try harder to attain the things that I want, and even if it doesn't go as planned, I would be resilient and try again.
So I was wondering if travelling has had similar effect for anyone else here.
What were you like when you travelled?
Did it make you feel or act differently?
And while I'm at it:
Where was it that you went and why was it great (or not great)?
One of the issues for me is the whole "living in the future" thing. It's good for introspection and planning for self improvement, but sometimes, I fantasise about ideal scenarios which I know are unrealistic. But it causes me to have expectations for how things should be anyhow.
So when reality doesn't meet my imagination, be it due to circumstance or my own laziness, it leads to to the worst kind of sadness - disappointment.
Before I went travelling, I had my doubts about whether or not I'd enjoy it. I thought about my shyness and lack of people skills and thinking "what if it this ends up being the most uncomfortable endeavour I've had to endure?"
To my surprise, once I reached my destination all my worries faded away.
Firstly, I became incredibly proactive in doing everything. Usually I am seriously disorganised and I am not a person that can be held accountable for things going to plan. However, I turned out to be the one person in my group that was looking up hostels and places to visit. I organised busses and flights and I was meticulous in keeping my belongings together and organised.
Basically, I became a "J" which, in a way, is how I've always wanted to be. But I was too comfortable being lazy.
But most importantly, I stopped thinking about unrealistic ideals for the future and I didn't dwell in the past either. I was surrounded by an entirely different culture and it was as though I was permanently content with everything. I was inspired. I could've been staring at a wall while I was over there and I would have been happy. In many ways it was puzzling, I had never felt like I was living in the present as I had then. A truly incredible experience. Being happy was effortless and it continued for long stretches of time.
The most surprising thing of all, was the fact that I became outgoing. I was striking up conversations with other travellers and it was an incredible feeling. I think part of the reason was when you're travelling, small talk isn't so small. The usual questions like "what do you do?" or "what have you been up to" that generally inspire mundane answers are replaced with interesting conversation.
All you have to ask is "where are you from?" or "what brought you here?" or "where are you going next?" and already you have a solid basis for an interesting conversation - because you're meeting travellers who are all doing things they want to do. They're not weighed down by thoughts about work or any other crap that follows everyday life, so they're more willing to talk about their passion or what excites them. The things that matter.
And when you meet locals, it's instantly engaging because you're experiencing their culture. What's normal for them is alien to you and vise versa. And comparing the differences between your cultures can be an interesting and hilarious conversation in itself.
Basically, when I was travelling I became the person I wanted to be. And I learned that I was capable of doing things that I could only dream of in the past. Ultimately, it opened me up. After I got back, I was more tolerant of the things that used to bother me, and I found myself pushing to make some of those unrealistic ideals become a reality. It has made me try harder to attain the things that I want, and even if it doesn't go as planned, I would be resilient and try again.
So I was wondering if travelling has had similar effect for anyone else here.
What were you like when you travelled?
Did it make you feel or act differently?
And while I'm at it:
Where was it that you went and why was it great (or not great)?