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Hey there INTPs! I've got a few questions for you. I'm asking cause I have an INTP friend and... well I really like him but he's a bit of a mystery sometimes. I worry that, as an ISFP, my emotional energy is...annoying sometimes. We're pretty close and we hang out often but like, I want to make our relationship deeper and he does so much for me, giving me advice and all but I feel like I never do anything for him, ya know? I seem to talk about myself to him a lot, like my feelings about things, etc, and he does the same back, but SO much less than I do...I don't want things to always be about me if that makes any sense. We have a lot of shared interests but we are complete opposites in so many ways. Anyway, here are the questions:

1. When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?
 

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1. bother to spend time with them

2. physical affection

3. if by "express" you mean "talk about emotions," the answer is yes

4. i don't see that as being "hard" on someone...unless by "confront" you mean an aggressive response. I will say something, definitely won't ignore it unless they are like sick, in a terrible mood, etc., and that explains the behavior.
 

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1. share my real opinions. give them advice or information that I think can help them. also won't hang out with someone I don't like as a friend anyway.
2. they'll notice me checking them out. I'm not good at hiding it.
3. no, but when I was younger, I didn't know how to respond or understand that (I'm 41). INTPs don't usually feel strongly about stuff.
4. with people I care about I feel like I need to help them see the truth so probably hard on them but I've learned to try to take it easy because people are more easily bothered than I am. With randoms, I will just give lip service.
 

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1. When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?

It doesn't. The fact that I see someone as a friend is pretty much enough to me. I don't keep a wide social circle, so if I communicate with you a lot, it means you're a friend.

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"

I feel awkward and do my best to hide it. I'm 31 and still have no idea how to interpret my approach to romance.

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?

It depends on what's being expressed. If it's love and admiration, hell yeah give me all of that! But if it's annoying illogical complaints, rages, sadness etc without basis, then it gets annoying real fast.

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?

No I ignore almost everything. INTPs don't like to push their standards onto others. However, they do tend to explode at some point when their patience has been tested and pushed one too many times. If someone is doing something stupid, I'll probably tell them in a jokey way, but of course if they keep doing it and don't see the error in their ways, another explosion will occur.
 

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1. If I really like them, I'll initiate some of the (frequent) conversations.
2. I sleep with them.
3. No
4. I wouldn't say that's being hard either. If they're doing something stupid yeah I'll confront them but it's out of concern.
 

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1-as bearlybreathing said if I'm actually friends with someone I'll usually initiate the conversation. I don't know if other intps feel that way but I'm happy when I'm alone so if i make the effort to speak to you. You must mean something.
2- I don't know
3- it depends on the emotion and it depends on the form of expression.
I welcome happy emotions and I'd be thrilled to listen if you wanna talk about your emotions but if some one is sad because of an unchangeable situation -especially if there is nothing I can do- and they act based on that i will get annoyed.
4- if I'm sure my opinion makes a difference and the error is of practical importance i will tell them that they're wrong . But most of the time I don't say anything
 

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1. When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?

Long conversations about common interest topics.

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"

In my specific case, I got so overwhelmed by my feelings that I can't even establish a proper human interaction. So, all my romantic attachments are platonic ones.

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?

Sometimes yes, but I at least prefer to understand what they're thinking and feeling, since I'm very bad at realizing this kind of thing. I got some cold shoulders without even notice... So yeah, "please tell me exactly how you feel", I ask my friends to.

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?

I like to be honest about that, but always remembering that they have free will, as I have. Won't coadune with things I think are wrong, but won't force people doing what I think it's right. I only explain rationally the reason why I think that action won't do them any good, rather the opposite.
 

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3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?
3. No, talk away - they are problems and I like solving problems. If however, you just want to complain or get sympathy and you refuse to follow or receive advice or take responsibility it will get annoying real fast.

4. Yes. If I don't care I will say less. If I feel you won't listen because you haven't in the past, I may just let you make your own mistakes. If lots of people have shot me down in flames in the past over the same issue, then I will also likely just stay silent. If I'm staying silent it means I don't feel I can talk freely to you about such things.
 

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1 When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?
The more I like an individual, the more I hang around and share information, be friendly, help when I am around and ask thought provoking questions. I share my time, when I could otherwise do something. I am a solitary person, but my friends are few and others are acquaintances. But with relationships I spend more time with the one i am with.

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"
I personally try to be active in their life, I even share things I like as well.I get into Relationship mode, just from outside perception its incognito. Sometimes my actions are child like and playful. Playful through language and maybe general things.

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?
Feelers only annoy me when a solution has been presented and allowed time to process has not seemed to pass on by. Especially if I dedicate my time to help the one that I am in a relationship with, I expect progress. I put all I can in to helping resolve the issue. The issue itself would have to had happened 3-5 days. Personally, I love being around people who share their feelings, the parts that I don't like are exaggerated emotions, emotions that are irrational, or emotions that emphasize issues past the point they are needed. In all respects its about emotional respect. Its not that I would try to be mean, but its hard for me to distinguish between real and not. I learn that not by hearing the other speak but by actions.

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?
People I care for, I don't like to see or hear that they are not going about something the right way. When i say the word "something" i mean anything that can be considered stupid. Depending on the way the person acts i can choose to ignore or confront. But when I confront, I will wait till that person calms down some.
 

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If you were in a relationship with a loyal,faithful, highly intelligent beautiful,introverted woman who loved you and you loved her, what would make you abruptly end the relationship?
 

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If you were in a relationship with a loyal,faithful, highly intelligent beautiful,introverted woman who loved you and you loved her, what would make you abruptly end the relationship?
having decided to undertake something that would likely get me killed or sent to prison for a long time
 

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If you were in a relationship with a loyal,faithful, highly intelligent beautiful,introverted woman who loved you and you loved her, what would make you abruptly end the relationship?
Well if she is loyal, faithful, and highly intelligent, then, how could I leave the relationship! I guess I would have to find out that she was deeply infatuated with me in an obsessive demeanor in which she hurts or kills those, who she thinks might steal me away from her is one way. It would have to be along those lines. Other than that, I don't see my self ever leaving, even if i was broke and homeless; but at that point, I am already worried she might leave me! But she would have my all.
 

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1. When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?
*I hang out with them sometimes.

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"
Hardly different, besides the *obvious...It's awkward...

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?
*Hmm...more so, make me awkward. Again.

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?
*I usually ignore.
 

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Well if she is loyal, faithful, and highly intelligent, then, how could I leave the relationship! I guess I would have to find out that she was deeply infatuated with me in an obsessive demeanor in which she hurts or kills those, who she thinks might steal me away from her is one way. It would have to be along those lines. Other than that, I don't see my self ever leaving, even if i was broke and homeless; but at that point, I am already worried she might leave me! But she would have my all.
No nothing murderous or hurtfully obsessive about the girl in question. I'm afraid it may have been a simple case of immaturity. Both of them are in their early 20s and have little relationship experience.
 

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1. i willingly go and talk to them.

2.subtle useless things that dont help. sometimes avoid them... becuase that is "very effective"

3. personally no, what bothers me if i think they are trying to use emotions in a manipulative maner.

4. i try and point out that there is a better way, sadly im bad at doing it gently. so it can be rather... condenscending, im working on that.

i have noticed that i get along well with isfps for some reason, so hopefully that translates for you.
 

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Hey there INTPs! I've got a few questions for you. I'm asking cause I have an INTP friend and... well I really like him but he's a bit of a mystery sometimes. I worry that, as an ISFP, my emotional energy is...annoying sometimes. We're pretty close and we hang out often but like, I want to make our relationship deeper and he does so much for me, giving me advice and all but I feel like I never do anything for him, ya know? I seem to talk about myself to him a lot, like my feelings about things, etc, and he does the same back, but SO much less than I do...I don't want things to always be about me if that makes any sense. We have a lot of shared interests but we are complete opposites in so many ways. Anyway, here are the questions:

1. When you really like someone as a friend, how does it show?

2. When you like someone "romantically," how do you treat them differently from just a "friendship?"

3. Do feelers get annoying if they express themselves a lot to you?

4. Are you hard on people you care about? Like, if they are being stupid or doing something wrong, are you quick to confront, or do you feel more inclined to ignore?
Answers to numbered questions.

1. There will be hint of a smile for a split second and an immediate reset to pokerface while eye contact may hint at a lingering secret inner smile.

2. If they are around I may become completely terrified, fall over things. Or bad poetry is written or you may get frequent texts.

3. Not really. I wont have a well thought out remedy ready on the fly but wont mind listening. If you actually tell an INTP your emotions they tend to assume you need for them to fix the root cause of all such problems in the universe. If you came over for support... just say so and collect free hug. INTP minds are very literal and wont grasp the concept of utilizing sneak angles to snuggle hugs.

4. Im generally laid back and I like helping people get things or solve problems. It takes about 5 years of ignoring my advice for me to eventually blow a gasket. As long as Im uncertain wether malice is at work, id be forgiving.
 

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1. bother to spend time with them

2. physical affection

3. if by "express" you mean "talk about emotions," the answer is yes

4. i don't see that as being "hard" on someone...unless by "confront" you mean an aggressive response. I will say something, definitely won't ignore it unless they are like sick, in a terrible mood, etc., and that explains the behavior.
I just want you to know I think you're a hoot. You'd be a great partner in crime. ;)
 
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