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I. Got. The. Job. In. The. UK!!!!! Likely will be living/working 40-60 min from my SO by mid October!! Much improved vs. the current 9+ hours of travel



Delays..maybe mid-November? Maybe mid-December? So close but so far..dang unforeseen paperwork snafus lol
 

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Archer's Master
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So it's happening and we're finally meeting next month, and I'm really excited, giddy and all, but a huge part of me is already dreading the post-visit blues that would surely hit me hard, and it would be catastrophic (coz I know myself too much to underestimate how devastating it would feel). And dammit, brain, can you just let me enjoy life for a bit?!?
 

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Oh - I moved to the UK. I live here now, going into my 4th week! We're officially about an hour's drive from each other. So, sooooo nice to see each other on weekends n such. <3
 

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Plumcot
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So it's happening and we're finally meeting next month, and I'm really excited, giddy and all, but a huge part of me is already dreading the post-visit blues that would surely hit me hard, and it would be catastrophic (coz I know myself too much to underestimate how devastating it would feel). And dammit, brain, can you just let me enjoy life for a bit?!?
Congratulations! We're all here for you!
 

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Archer's Master
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Oh - I moved to the UK. I live here now, going into my 4th week! We're officially about an hour's drive from each other. So, sooooo nice to see each other on weekends n such. <3
Congratulations! So happy for you and your SO!
That's the dream. :blushed:
 

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Plumcot
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I think for the most part my anxiety stems from the fact that my boyfriend had a boyfriend before he met me, and met me and decided he liked me better. I'm worried the same thing will happen to me. Like, he'll find someone better, he won't be happy with me.

I know he's been depressed, but fuck, pay attention to me. Please. No, no, I need to give him space.
 

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Why don't you live together?

I moved on a work visa which is very difficult to obtain (I am thankfully in a qualifying profession) and requires a sponsor. So, that was the closest I could find one to work with. :)

I'm also finding it a nice transition between online interaction/video chats with several in-person visits to living closer. Gives us some time to adjust and "date" in person. We do want to live together, have talked about how we'd be able to afford a nice place together and so on, but it's a matter of lining up where he can get work and I can get work. Someday we'll get there but we're not rushed.
 
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I moved on a work visa which is very difficult to obtain (I am thankfully in a qualifying profession) and requires a sponsor. So, that was the closest I could find one to work with. :)

I'm also finding it a nice transition between online interaction/video chats with several in-person visits to living closer. Gives us some time to adjust and "date" in person. We do want to live together, have talked about how we'd be able to afford a nice place together and so on, but it's a matter of lining up where he can get work and I can get work. Someday we'll get there but we're not rushed.
How are you adjusting to life in the UK? The language is probably not really a problem, but I can imagine that you might have experienced some culture shock.
 

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How are you adjusting to life in the UK? The language is probably not really a problem, but I can imagine that you might have experienced some culture shock.

Not too bad for me so far at all. Just finished up my 5th week here and I'm doing great!

Several things helped: I think I visited here like 6 or 7 times prior for a couple weeks at a time, so I knew a bit what to expect. Another is I just went into this figuring it's a new country so I'm not looking for "sameness". I've seen some expats who moved here a bit...I dunno, complaining I guess about not having this or that, can't find certain things, or how XYZ is annoying because it's done differently here, and I just read it thinking "...what did you expect moving to a different country?" So, I'm not having those types of moments where I'm like "UGH DIFFERENT"..it's more like "aha, I see what's different here. Interesting!" I'm fascinated more than anything and I love the learning.

I also am driving and I think that gives me some sense of control over my life here haha as well as I went straight into working about a week after I got here and my colleagues are very friendly and kind and helpful. I also moved into a home and rented a room from a British couple so they helped me initially. Now I have the place to myself a couple months while they're away on holiday and it is NICE. But I think having them there my first three weeks kind of buffered any feeling of floundering/drowning because I could ask them things.

Final thing that helps is that I was preparing and working for this for about a year and a half so I was really ready to go when it was time to go. I'm very satisfied that I got here and got what I wanted. Whether I liked the country in the first place was part of my considerations before I started the process. I knew I liked it here when I visited and it's just...more of the same liking. :D Oh, and I guess also that while I love my family and friends, I was not super attached and am pretty content on my own so I'm fine that I don't have friends here right away or whatever. Facebook, though the devil in some ways, is fantastic for keeping in the loop with family and friends both on my end and theirs.

I've read sometimes people have a few month "honeymoon" period with the country because it's all fresh and new and fun and then all the negative feelings come for a while after that - so we'll see. I honestly can't really see it happening because I just..have a different mindset I guess but I'll review in a few months lol


ANYWAY...that was probably way more info than you wanted but..yeah, it's going very well! Thanks :)
 

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I think living an ocean away is the hardest part of this relationship ;~;
Leicteron! I haven't seen you post in ages, how've you been?! Still rocking Yes?!
 
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Edgelord
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Leicteron! I haven't seen you post in ages, how've you been?! Still rocking Yes?!
I've been trying to become the Überleilei, it's been a hard time but I'm doing my best to overcome those challenges. I finally found a potential gf, but she lives so far away...
 

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I've been trying to become the Überleilei, it's been a hard time but I'm doing my best to overcome those challenges. I finally found a potential gf, but she lives so far away...
I'm sorry to hear that she lives so far away but am so happy for you at the same time! I remember how important that is to you!
 

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Edgelord
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I'm sorry to hear that she lives so far away but am so happy for you at the same time! I remember how important that is to you!
And we both share that "feel trapped in a backwards town in a third world country we don't identify with" thing u3u
 

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Archer's Master
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I think living an ocean away is the hardest part of this relationship ;~;
I feel you!
Dreading the first visit because I'd be a sobbing mess after and I'm just afraid I wouldn't know how to cope again after that first touch...and go.

Sometimes, I regret not having thought of the logistics properly before giving this a go.
 
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