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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Would you say you like appearing mysterious to others? Or that you try to in any way?


Personally, I don't care about coming off as mysterious to other people. I'd rather be known, understood and appreciated and if not, then I'd rather not be known or have shared at all. I don't just speak to hear myself talk. The point of language is to convey a message and for that message to be understood. Otherwise, in my mind it's like - what's the point? I don't even think I'm that complicated or hard to understand (unless I haven't explained myself well or the person isn't meeting me halfway). I do think people are complex but I don't think they're that difficult to understand. Complexity just means there's depth, not necessarily hard to understand. I feel like there's nothing new under the sun, most people follow patterns that are not impossible to tap into (I don't see this as a bad thing).


The one exception to all of this is when I write poetry. Writing poetry is the one place I feel free to be creative. There are no rules. I can let my hair down and let loose. I really don't care if it's understood or not. Sometimes I go out of my way to make it more cryptic. I like hiding within a symbol or a metaphor. Sometimes it makes me feel safer (maybe this is type 6 stuff). And since it's pretty abstract/metaphorical, a person can take multiple meanings out of it if they wish. I really don't care if they interpret it the way I meant it whenever I wrote it. There's beauty in them taking their own meaning away from it.


What about you? As always, all types are welcome to respond and share their own feedback and experiences. The more perspectives, the better.
 

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I honestly do slightly like it in a way, but I dislike it more. I definitely don't try to appear to this way.

For me, it leads to awkward situations. Since I'm usually pretty quiet/in my own head, people appear to view that in a mysterious way where they can assume my thoughts in that moment are more profound or deep than they actually are.

It's especially awkward if I'm directly questioned about this, about what I'm thinking in that moment. Because often times it's along the lines of playing out the scenario of a time traveler traveling back in time to kill Hitler, but forgetting to plan the details out and assuming all he needs is a gun. As a result, he gets tackled by the SS and Hitler jumps in the time machine, and now you have time traveling Hitler. Either that, or something like wanting to cross the street, slam my hands on a random car and exclaim "I'm walking here" in a thick New York accent. But then wondering if the person would be really nice and apologetic or frightened and then I'd feel bad for trying to make myself laugh.

These things can be pretty far off from others' assumptions, and then it can get pretty awkward and sometimes I don't want to go through the trouble of explaining these, both because it would be difficult to explain accurately and it would just be weird, especially if their assumptions were way different. So I go with the "Eh, nothing really :idunno:" response.

But then, that can also lead people to seeing more of an air of mystery and then it becomes a vicious cycle. :frustrating:

Maybe I should just be more open and tell everyone about time traveling Hitler. That would resolve the whole issue, but then again it would probably just create brand new issues in its place.
 

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I love symbolism too. I didn't really think of it as mysterious but I guess it always does make you wonder what it refers to exactly. I would say I like to have both the artist's original intentions and how I feel about what I see. I probably research 10 out of 10 times when I see one the original idea behind it.

I love finding it in products you can buy. When I was younger I remember owls being all the rage. On prints in wallpaper and fabric. Shaped into wooden salt and pepper shakers. Looking back on it it made sense for my city. Urban but has these forests right in the city even downtown. But where I live now, maybe a little weird. I only see it at Starbucks I suppose.

In regards to other people I do have a job where it became necessary to actually create an image of myself that could be quickly understood.
Mystery was kind of a byproduct and later something I did do. I know people find me attractive, I have certain ways of doing things, even how I dress... I try to hide certain things like that, it doesn't always go perfectly. You might get a snippet, I might speak French for a moment and then nothing again for ever...
My intention was not so much mystery or even hiding but just being very plain and being part of the background. People can be annoying, you might not want to make friends with those you attract etc...
 

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Mystery & People

I like clarity and certainty since it tends to make my life more simple. That's not to say I don't like complexity, it just very much depends on the topic. Considering all the factors you have to take into account whenever you interact with another individual, I see no reason to make it be more complicated than it has to be. I love directness and being able to skip all the fluff we tend to fill conversation, such as too much small talk, rhetorical questions or things which otherwise serve no purpose of greater meaning and might even just be viewed as time filler. That may not be very interesting to some, but if mystery, assumptions and dragging things out is the main focus on of someone else, or perhaps all they know/are used to, then we have very different ways to go about life anyway.

While introverts are often known to be private, and as such by default might be perceived as "mysterious", I consider myself for being an open book. That doesn't mean I'll share everything with anyone, there is simply no need to and as most will find out as they age, no one cares equally about what you have to say. As a general rule of thumb, I tend to share the most with those people I know who are and will be present for the foreseeable future, even if we never have any guarantee. All that said, it's not impossible to engage in a deep and meaningful conversation with a stranger but as with anything, it just greatly depends on circumstances and how I feel it is of importance to me and the other part.


Mystery and everything else
It can be entertaining to think of mystery in almost every other context, and as such it can be a very satisfying journey. As long as things don't have an immediate or potential damaging outcome to the individual, it's more than likely healthy to have some in your life, and besides we all do every single day anyway since none of us know what tomorrow brings.
 

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When I am talking, I want to be as clear as possible so I don't have to talk more than the desired, which is usually is not much to not at all, at least in person. Also, being mysterious on purpose would only possibly piss other people off. That said, I struggle to explain some kinds of things, so it is not unlikely that some could perceive me as "mysterious". The idea of being perceived as mysterious is somewhat romantic to me, but it doesn't seem practical at all. :kitteh:

I do love mystery, though. The way things connect and simply the way my writing works can be interpreted as mysterious and vague. I use a lot of symbolism, metaphors, strange connections between things (unintentionally, it is just how my creativity works). This is totally fine as the kind of stories I write, mostly horror and mystery, generally need to be vague.

I am not very fond of over-exposition in fiction. I think a writer is free to tell their story as they see fit, but I prefer when they give us only enough information to stimulate our imagination. Make the core aspects of a character, let's say, as specific as possible (unless the core concepts are supposed to vague), but as for everything else, give us little hints, don't tell everything. It is boring. Also, if it is not a book, showing is almost always better than telling.
 

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Like most people here, I talk with others with the intention to be as clear and transparent as possible.
I hate giving mixed signals or messages that could be interpreted in different ways.
However, I am usually very concise in conversations... anxiety.
I might not say the right words sometimes :\
I try but it comes of as if I have a hidden agenda more often than not.
well, I do have a "purpose" for the things I say, but wither I state it out loud or not, I do not lie.
I guess this could come off as mysterious sometimes,
though people usually point out that I'm a weirdo, rarely manipulative, never mysterious.
I'm happy with that.

Mystery and encryption are only abundant in my creative output..
I sometimes unconsciously hide myself in my art, and feel troubled when others see it.
I feel exposed, because I am very shy, and not very assertive.
Secretly wishing someone would figure out the essence of my soul or something p:
and then I can berry my head somewhere
:laughing:
 

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I never used to see myself as mysterious until I learned about the MBTI, conversed with friends and family about it and realised that I really am. And now I wouldn't change it for anything. I like being mysterious because I like being private - I don't enjoy it for any other reason really.
 

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I guess I could be seen as mysterious. But I'm really just distracted by thinking so I don't talk as much.
 

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Not deliberately. I do my best to blend in and avoid being the center of attention, which may make me seem mysterious to some. I present as generally mainstream in appearance, which is primarily camouflage. I become mysterious by default when my words and actions contradict my appearance. Not gonna lie. I like throwing certain kinds of people off balance with these contradictions.
 

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I definitely don't go out of my way to be "mysterious" but I've been told by past boyfriends I can be complex. I believe it's mainly because I have dated only extreme extroverts who don't understand my need to introvert, reflect, and process so many things so often. I can be on top of the world with them, and in an instant revert to my inner self and think about some random feeling. I do a lot of mental digesting. It's been mistaken as being "moody" more times than I can count, even when I try to explain this to them, they still always seem to be trying to figure me out. Same goes with certain family members. Growing up my mom was always asking me "what's up with you today?" And I would be caught off guard… She finally came to the realization that she just couldn't fully understand me. I don't chase mystery, but it seems to find me somewhat unexpectedly.
 

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I have this perception of myself that the harder I try to be less mysterious about myself the more mysterious I make myself.

I surprise myself sometimes too when I peel back a layer and expose it only to find several more beneath.

Over the years of engaging with other people I think it has to do with on average most people have a fully formed conceptualization and understanding of themselves and their motivations. They know their limits even at times unconsciously, their likes and dislikes, what they would be willing to do and how far they are willing to go. To what capacity they represent their true selves to the general public is limited to the capacity that they find most comfortable about themselves.

I am undoubtedly no stranger to this, but I find myself to have some mild eccentricities in that my interest vary greatly and I have no trouble diving deep into conversation or debate and also exposing my truer self to others depending on the circumstances. Couple that with a strong desire to always test my limits and expand my interests and you have a recipe for someone who is figuratively all over the place.

As such I find myself operating in two modes. One of reserved mild mannered behavior for the usual coming and goings and then the more expressive less restricted self which tends to not be too concerned with general perception and is quick to open up to others and attempt to establish a social dialogue and matching interests.

This type of behavior is relatively uncommon for the most part since it does not present a fully formed identity for people to conceptualize. As such it retains quite a few question marks in the minds of others who interact with me.

Assumptions tend to be made by their own perception that ultimately prove quite false. Like introverted tendencies causing me to be unsociable when it reality I can be quite the social butterfly given the right environment and have little to no difficulty in getting along with other people.

As already echoed here however since that formed perception is difficult to grasp for most people I tend to leave people more confused than before.

So over the years I have come to accept that this is just a part of my being, and it can be quite fun messing with people's perceptions and watch them get completely puzzled expressions upon their faces.
 

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Discussion Starter #16
Safer in what way? Safe from what?
Other people's prying eyes. I tend to always write my poems with an audience in mind so a poem may be about me but I would rather not be literal and get into the nitty gritty details of my own personal experience. I think something has the potential to become much more powerful if you clothe it in symbolism or metaphor anyway. In a way, I want other people to relate it to their own experiences. It shouldn't be so personal that the reader can't take away their own meaning from it. And in this way, it serves two purposes.

I'll also say that I relate to the reason why Jesus spoke in parables:

Matthew
10 The disciples came to him and asked, “Why do you speak to the people in parables?”


11 He replied, “Because the knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of heaven has been given to you, but not to them. 12 Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. 13 This is why I speak to them in parables:


“Though seeing, they do not see;
though hearing, they do not hear or understand.
14 In them is fulfilled the prophecy of Isaiah:


“‘You will be ever hearing but never understanding;
you will be ever seeing but never perceiving.
15 For this people’s heart has become calloused;
they hardly hear with their ears,
and they have closed their eyes.
I think it's good when the meaning of something isn't always so readily apparent because it prevents mental laziness and really forces the person to chew on it and listen with their heart if they really want to know the true meaning of something. And if they feel it's too much work, then they don't care enough or want it enough to unravel it. It is a test in a way.


Also, for some reason this scene from the show Instant Star comes to mind. She writes and sings this song and all the people who are closest to her (hearing it for the first time in the audience) wind up thinking the song is specifically about them. In reality, it's just about her dad. I just find that interesting that it could speak to so many on different levels even if it was not originally intended to be that way.

 

 

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I do not particularly give a crap about appearing mysterious to some folks. I know I seem mysterious to some folks, but once they get to know me, the mystery kind of get flushed down the toilet. :rolling:

I don't do the mystery shit on purpose. It is mostly just a byproduct of needing a lot of down time from people.
 

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Not at all. I want to be direct and understood. If there's any mystery surrounding me, it would only serve to prolong probing questions which would be distracting me from what I'd want to be doing.
 

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I wouldn't classify myself as a mystery, however I seem to hold the minority opinion on this matter. Everyone else that I know, including family members, tend to see me as mysterious in one way or another. They seem to say no one other than me seem to know where I'm coming from, where I'm headed off to, what's on my mind nor everything that I'm doing.

I think they get that impression because while I come off as extroverted and talkative, i'm actually very private about the things that I do. Very rarely do I hold a conversation with someone that is about me.
 
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