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For more information:Maladaptive Daydreaming - What is it?

I used to think that I was the only one with it until I found out that others have it as well. It has become a serious addiction and I also had the misfortune to stumble upon an ignorant psychologyst who(just from me mentioning I have fantasies of another world) thought I had psychosis. I freaked out when I heard that. Not to mention I'm also a hypochondriac and can easily make myself believe I suffer from something I don't(but what if in the future...no, no, cut it out... ).
Right now I'm trying to avoid these fantasies.

So, does any of you have/has had it? Do you know a person who experiences it?
I have found out that after daydreaming I am more creative but I have also wasted so much time throughout the years. Then again, imagining life without it is super depressing. Like the state I am in now. When it becomes an addiction, it's quite dangerous if you haven't developed your outer world enough. The outer world feels one-dimensional and colourless without these excessive daydreams. But you know it's taking your life(time for actual living) away. You feel like an architect who finally has to consider all the work that needs to be done, not just make drawings and hide them under his bed...for example.
 

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I won't claim to know if I do or do not- I function just fine in reality, but am barely aware of completing or being in mundane situations.
It makes me wonder though- how many maladaptive daydreamers have the capacity to become epic authors. Were/are people like J.R.R. Tolkien, George R.R. Martin, J.K. Rowling, C.S. Lewis, etc. maladaptive daydreamers with an added compulsion to record their mental adventures?
 

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WHAT.
I read that whole thing and it just made me angry.
So the hell what? So I sometimes have to lock myself in my bedroom for a few hours to finish a daydream. So I never pay attention in classes that bore me. So I still have imaginary friends.
Nope.
Nope nope nope. They're not going to turn my daydreaming habit into a negative thing.
Because last month I got to roadtrip with Dracula, and there's a universe where I'm married to the perfect man (who is also a warlock), and at night sometimes I shapeshift into a giant spider and solve mysteries in the 1800's with a 10-year-old genius and her reincarnated demon-slaying father.
Why would I want to stop? I'm a writer, how the hell else am I supposed to come up with ideas?

Daydreaming, maladaptive or not, is what gives us artists, writers, inventors, musicians, and really anyone and everyone of intellectual value. Daydreamers shape the earth! Shakespeare dreamed of fairy kings and queens. Tolkein dreamed up Middle Earth-- in the trenches, mind you, when he really freaking should have been paying attention to what he was doing. Stephanie Meyer, for better or worse, has re-defined the modern vampire novel, using daydreaming, and speaking to the daydreams of millions of young girls. Stephen King's daydreams hatch into the best kind of nightmares within us all.

Reality is boring and needs to be spiced up sometimes. Some of us have the ability to retreat from it and some of us are stuck in math class forever. Some of us gain intense pleasure from being able to obsess over a theme or a series or a genre or a character, and some of us get pleasure from problem-solving and progress-having or whatever it is people do. Some of us have alternate personas we can pull out when we need to tackle a situation we're not comfortable with, and some of us just have the one version that they use for everything like a pair of worn work gloves.

This is how I live. This is my way of life. This is my work and my passion. My mind is my playground, my refuge, my asylum, the womb of my imagination and my nightmares, the source of my actions and choices. I've walked the halls of Hogwarts and loved and warred with the people within. I've died at the hands of a space-age dystopia in a metal coffin for treason. I've sailed a golden ship straight across the Andromeda galaxy and sought treasure where none have ever found it. I've met the man of my dreams over and over and over again, and loved him differently each time.

The dull pleasure and pain of reality is tired and taught. Fantasy is novel, fluid, and rapturous. To create, to design, to live vividly and in full color is my life's greatest gift. To share these visions with the rest of the world through language and storytelling is my greatest mission.

Woe unto those that condemn our dreams as nonsense. As impractical, as time-wasting, as adversely affecting our livelihoods. We daydreamers may live in a half-madness, but this is the real world. We're all mad here.
 

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I agree with @Unfey, I find it annoying this has actually been taken by someone and turned into a thing. I find nothing wrong with it provided it does not become either properly obsessive or starts to outright replace real-world interaction. Although to be fair there is a section in the article which covers this.

I do this. My daydreaming seems fairly grounded in 'reality' (i.e. the laws of physics and so on) but my mind is frequently elsewhere. Often I can't even listen to the music I like because it'll prod me to zone so far out that the outside world almost completely disappears, and interrupt me at your peril. I have an imaginary friend and imaginary world (which, for the record, is a coping strategy I use to keep me sane, thank you very much) and I set aside time to indulge in it. I have complicated plots and an intricate substitute reality. It is the zone in which my mind is free to fully express itself in a way it can't in day-to-day life. I am very aware it's all fantasy but I don't care.
In my states of depression the fantasy often turns dark. I find this is crucial in later reflection to help me analyse my fears and so on. In brighter moments I've found it helps me plan for the future by analysing my wants, needs and capabilities.
I find it essential to my current sanity and state of being and life without it would be so dull as to be unimaginable. This isn't a new thing for the DSM, it's part of my fundamental character and being.
Lots of time spent does not equal lots of time wasted. Lots of time spent does not equal obsessive.

My daydreaming is awesome and I refuse to call it 'maladaptive' until I start punching my friends and asking them what they did with my 400kph rocket car. Maladaptive my left buttock.
 
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WHAT.
I read that whole thing and it just made me angry.
So the hell what? So I sometimes have to lock myself in my bedroom for a few hours to finish a daydream. So I never pay attention in classes that bore me. So I still have imaginary friends.
Nope.
Nope nope nope. They're not going to turn my daydreaming habit into a negative thing.
Because last month I got to roadtrip with Dracula, and there's a universe where I'm married to the perfect man (who is also a warlock), and at night sometimes I shapeshift into a giant spider and solve mysteries in the 1800's with a 10-year-old genius and her reincarnated demon-slaying father.
Why would I want to stop? I'm a writer, how the hell else am I supposed to come up with ideas?

Daydreaming, maladaptive or not, is what gives us artists, writers, inventors, musicians, and really anyone and everyone of intellectual value. Daydreamers shape the earth! Shakespeare dreamed of fairy kings and queens. Tolkein dreamed up Middle Earth-- in the trenches, mind you, when he really freaking should have been paying attention to what he was doing. Stephanie Meyer, for better or worse, has re-defined the modern vampire novel, using daydreaming, and speaking to the daydreams of millions of young girls. Stephen King's daydreams hatch into the best kind of nightmares within us all.

Reality is boring and needs to be spiced up sometimes. Some of us have the ability to retreat from it and some of us are stuck in math class forever. Some of us gain intense pleasure from being able to obsess over a theme or a series or a genre or a character, and some of us get pleasure from problem-solving and progress-having or whatever it is people do. Some of us have alternate personas we can pull out when we need to tackle a situation we're not comfortable with, and some of us just have the one version that they use for everything like a pair of worn work gloves.

This is how I live. This is my way of life. This is my work and my passion. My mind is my playground, my refuge, my asylum, the womb of my imagination and my nightmares, the source of my actions and choices. I've walked the halls of Hogwarts and loved and warred with the people within. I've died at the hands of a space-age dystopia in a metal coffin for treason. I've sailed a golden ship straight across the Andromeda galaxy and sought treasure where none have ever found it. I've met the man of my dreams over and over and over again, and loved him differently each time.

The dull pleasure and pain of reality is tired and taught. Fantasy is novel, fluid, and rapturous. To create, to design, to live vividly and in full color is my life's greatest gift. To share these visions with the rest of the world through language and storytelling is my greatest mission.

Woe unto those that condemn our dreams as nonsense. As impractical, as time-wasting, as adversely affecting our livelihoods. We daydreamers may live in a half-madness, but this is the real world. We're all mad here.
What you're saying rings true for me as well. I am also not happy with trying to spend my time only in this boring, "real" world. With these daydreams everything becomes a source of inspiration and it gives me power to function better in the outer world. And without them...I lose my enthusiasm, feel apathetic, depressed. The problem is that some psychologysts like putting people in frames if they do not live up to their standard ''doer" personality. They label you as mentally ill and that's when the depersonalization starts. No wonder so many people get tired of the world and commit suicide, because they have no other shelter. It's time for psychologysts to consider whether it's normal there to be only one type of "normal" and everything else-mild to strong.....disorder.
 

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I totally agree with @Unfey to a tee. I will admit that these daydreams of mine have given me quite a scare a number of times, but i know for a fact that without them, i wouldn't have been able to make it to where i am. The things i see and think of, they are an extension of who i am and reflect certain aspects of my persona. There is a little bit of my essence in all the little girls i see and the trees and the animals. It helps me in ways i don't really understand. It's therapeutic and comforting, even if the voices scare me sometimes. It is who i am.

Although, honestly, i've been having less of these daydreams with time. My mind was in a terrible place for an extended period of time and as such, my daydreams have decreased a lot. It's strange to admit, but there seems to be like a part of me that was cut off, almost. I feel like i am only a fraction of what i was? It's not a very pleasant feeling.
 

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Not quite to the degree that I can't function but I definitely daydream or what if a lot. I have caused myself some mild what if anxiety before. But I function fine and I know when I'm not being rational. I can't change my nature.
 

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Concerning Maladaptive Daydreaming

So, I came across the description of Maladaptive Daydreaming on my wondering and was both intrigued and filled with a profound sense of dread once it explored a little.

With a quick search, I know that it has come up before on this site, and in the INFP forum specifically on this thread, here, and somewhat here.

Just wanted to add my 2-cents I guess, so picked this one to post in.

I am intrigued because:

A) This concept is an interesting perspective from the POV of methodical thinking trying to breakdown the very complex mental process of daydreaming. It's the kind of shit which has drawn me to cognitive studies, MBTI, and psychology in the first place because it is just an other exploration of how to map human intelligence, cognition, and emotion and it is just freakin' fascinating.

B) The aspect of studying daydreaming pros and cons in realtime from an objective POV has an very personal interest to me (and, I suspect, other INFPs). As a personality that has is mainly concerned with "what is 'right' with what I want and how do I get that 'rightness' fully formed and useful to myself and others'" (Fi/Te axis), this appeals to the "how do I get it" part of myself that I will apparently continue to struggle with until my last breath. Daydreaming is extremely easy for me to do. So much so that it has stopped me in my tracks more than a hundred times in recent memory alone and I have a long, detailed memory.

As a child, it was fun when I was alone and I was alone often because I was not 'normal' growing up and would elect to just wonder off into the woods (I lived in Northern Ontario for the first seven years of my life and the elementary school I attended was right beside forest before the large river) or seclude myself in an other part of the playground that was technically 'out of bounds'.

As a teenager, it was both exhilarating and terrifying because I was usually about eight steps ahead of everybody in terms of mentally predicting or experiencing what was going to happen or why something happened because I would live through the full range of the emotions of others without them knowing and was like 'EMPATHY: holy shit, I get you, but I am living your fear/pain/happiness/dread/doubt and then some and I am dying over here of all the feels, wtf I do I do? ahhhhh'. It was also tumultuous to explore incredible depths of emotions in my head with fictional characters while realizing that I had used a combination of my own feelings with what I was inspirationally taking from others in real life and through reading book and watching stories on television and in movies.

As an adult, that cognition I have with other people's emotions is still there, just less overwhelming. I can't 'turn it off' (I have tried and it hurt me mentally enough that I physically wasn't able to function for a good month, so yeah, not doing that again anytime soon), but I can kinda filter the content a little better so I don't just sit there dying of feels. Same goes for the use of fiction as a way to deal with reality and personal feelings combo. Mostly though, my daydreaming jumps back and forth between a problem solving tool and a way to look at the world through several interesting present, past, future lenses in order to feel something personally profound and then (hopefully) share it to do some good.

Having more people understand the mental processes behind my daydreaming is something I find important because it usually opens peoples eyes to the call forth the depths of empathy, beauty, or even cynicism I can produce in equal measures just by going on adventures in my head. Perspective is so important and people don't want to follow their hearts because they don't really seem to know their hearts and or know how to balance that with what is going on in the real world. And since daydreaming is one of the ways that I use to solve that, I can't not be excited that people are studying it.

I am filled me with a profound sense of dread because:

A) As others have already expressed in this thread, my first and foremost dread is that particular individuals will label my first and foremost problem solving and creative thinking tool as MD. And they will. We all know someone who will read this and go 'aha! They are mentally ill!" because of the outlined 'symptoms'.

There is a big difference between:

- Living constantly in a daydream for the sake of escapism (for individuals with, say, cluster C personality disorders) or perhaps a way of your brain dealing with trauma (such as PTSD relapse memory living).

AND

- Allowing your brain to work through the thoughts and emotions already in there from just day to day life and a heavy Ne-dom or aux.

The 'symptoms' of MD seem to overlap into both the essential and dangerous versions of daydreaming: One that can actually consume your life and one that I know I use on a daily basis to live as a productive member of society while exploring/fulfilling my own core values.

In short, misdiagnosis of MD can be used to hurt people with deep wells of imagination. Someone might/will suggest it at some point in time and make one of their greatest, most naturally useful parts of their psyche be labeled 'wrong' and no one will listen to a counter-argument because an 'established person/s' has deemed them incompetent to make a judgement call on the cool labyrinth inside their heads...

B)
By having multiple simultaneous thoughts, your brain is strengthening your mental work space — the more mental workspace you have, the stronger your ability to mentally juggle more than one task. "Wandering mind correlates with higher degrees of what is referred to as working memory. Cognitive scientists define this type of memory as the brain's ability to retain and recall information in the face of distractions," according to a study by researchers from the University of Wisconsin and the Max Planck Institute for Human Cognitive and Brain Science.
My second dread is that no matter how many times you force certain individuals to read ^that^ over and over again, they will eventually claim 'bullshit' and call you any form of lazy, useless, or unproductive.

Daydreaming, no matter how long I did it for or what I daydreamed about, was something I was almost always punished for as a child and teenager usually because it did not produce immediate, tangible, and visible results. Therefore, as an adult I take great effort to ensure that most other adults don't see me do it without a paper-draft in front of me or I hide my daydreaming by using something else as as a cover. You would be surprised how effective walking a memorized route with purpose and a clipboard in hand or sitting in a corner 'reading something in a corner with a blank stare' can do for one's mental contemplation and hijinx in relative peace.

By all means, there are times to act and a times to think and dream, and if I am, say, being shot at, you bet I'm not going to take 10 minutes in a fire-fight to go 'I wonder...' BECAUSE SHIT NEEDS TO GET DONE! But in a situation where you have some time, there is always going to be individual who would/will look at the daydreamer and go 'what a complete waste of time' regardless of whether or not I just thought of six different ways to solve your problem by 10 minutes of wondering in my head 'fantasizing' each pathway. In that time frame I may or may not have also: planned for contingencies in case something goes wrong with the individual/s' wellbeing selected to solve the problem as required, the physical mechanical things that could go wrong depending on how much history I have of the tools and gear available/being used; and come up with a good time-estimate for the problem solving to occure. Oh, and I also have thought of an alternative individual that you can call/see to give you other perspectives regarding how to solve your problem too - just in case.

That is the true superpower of a focused daydreamer - the ultimate application of this quote to a single goal:

I think too much. I think ahead. I think behind. I think sideways. I think it all. If it exists, I’ve fucking thought of it. - Winona Ryder
The lesson is wait 10 minutes and you will have avoided a storm of monglershit rather than telling me that I am a waste of space and time. Oh wait... I'm the lazy one??? *shrug* Sure. *shoves problem solver #2 towards individual with problem* Here's that other person who can (hopefully) deal with your shit because no matter how much I think 'fuck 'em' I still care about you, you stupid inconsiderate dolt... *grumbles and walks away while muttering about fucking Fi values and how people are still good... somehow...*

Now, non-problem solving fantasies have their uses too because it is a scope out and filter for all of my emotions, tastes, and deep thoughts. It is a way of looking through the Fi-Ne Wondercave as described by Micheal Pierce:

The INFP’s personal dream-world is like an enormous system of caverns out of The Arabian Nights. The caverns are filled with all manner of strange and wonderful treasures unknown to the outside world. All the while there is a strange and inviting light glowing from somewhere deep in the caverns, and the purpose of the INFP’s many expeditions into their dream-world is to discover the source of this beautiful glow. Attempting to describe the nature of this strange light and convey some sense of its beauty and warmth and all that it illuminates within the caves is the drive behind the INFP’s characteristically expansive, sincere, original, and rich artistic creations.

The INFP is often tempted to spend long amounts of time exploring their caverns in search of the primordial fire. To some extent, they lead a double life: the dreary reality full of unoriginal, conforming mobs and all their injustice, insincerity, cruelty and noise, and then the breaths of air within their own minds, within created worlds where their values and passions are exemplified. There is a drive to dig through themselves and map out every inch of their psyche’s caverns and keep careful record of all its treasures. They find their inner life delightful, but often fear to share it with others due to past criticism or incomprehension.
Therefore, if I go through a particularly detailed and strong fantasy, I will analyze the hell out of what it produced and that is important/fun for me. Why does this character I have created have such a stiff hatred for her eldest child? Why am I romanticizing an encounter with a stranger from this afternoon - what was attractive about that woman? How do I go about expressing myself to my friends in regards to the type of sadness I feel for that man who lost his son, maybe like the train driver I've been writing about? The questions are sometimes endless, but I do a lot of mental work to explore shades of emotions and reflect on what I want from life in these fantasies. It does not hinder me, it gives me a sense of purpose and meaning to get up and make a difference.

My worry is that MD might just be an other way to stifle my application of effective problem solving and self-exploration because it will encourage the idea that 'daydreaming is useless' when it CLEALY isn't, FFS.

Conclusion:

Both from a personal and scientific POV, the description of MD as a whole at the moment is greatly in need of reassessment and refinement.

By all means, if you think that you are fantasizing too much and are worried that it is consuming your life to the point of non-functionality, then hell yes, go see someone about it, but if you space out every once and a while, it's not the end of the world and it is completely normal, healthy thing for a brain and person to do - it just turns out to be a little more essential for some people.

I would be very careful if someone brings it up as a viable diagnosis in therapy or counselling unless it is paired with something else - like depression, or, in cases where the characters in the dreamworld become real, schizophrenia or hallucinations.

Otherwise, I think it's simply misunderstanding the use of Ne and intuitive cognition in general. My quick search had this subject pop up the term in INFP, ENFP, ENTP and INTP parts of the forums the most - all Ne-dom/aux users who actively worry about whether or not this is something they should question about their sanity (it also showed up in the INFJ counselling purposes/tips, but I'd have to explore further to make any other observations).

I would be curious to explore conversation about Maladaptive Daydreaming with the sensor personalities in regards to their perceptions and judgements of their own intuitive functions in inferior positions in this context just to get a better look at the field from the other end of the spectrum. I imagine that it is more complex than xSxJs/xSxP looking at us who daydream and going - "OMG, Si-Ne/Se-Ni loop - Nuuuuuuu! Come back to the real world and be functional, godsdamnit!"

Anyways.... yeah, an other long post, but it's done and I am satisfied.
 

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WHAT.
I read that whole thing and it just made me angry.
So the hell what? So I sometimes have to lock myself in my bedroom for a few hours to finish a daydream. So I never pay attention in classes that bore me. So I still have imaginary friends.
Nope.
Nope nope nope. They're not going to turn my daydreaming habit into a negative thing.
Because last month I got to roadtrip with Dracula, and there's a universe where I'm married to the perfect man (who is also a warlock), and at night sometimes I shapeshift into a giant spider and solve mysteries in the 1800's with a 10-year-old genius and her reincarnated demon-slaying father.
Why would I want to stop? I'm a writer, how the hell else am I supposed to come up with ideas?

Daydreaming, maladaptive or not, is what gives us artists, writers, inventors, musicians, and really anyone and everyone of intellectual value. Daydreamers shape the earth! Shakespeare dreamed of fairy kings and queens. Tolkein dreamed up Middle Earth-- in the trenches, mind you, when he really freaking should have been paying attention to what he was doing. Stephanie Meyer, for better or worse, has re-defined the modern vampire novel, using daydreaming, and speaking to the daydreams of millions of young girls. Stephen King's daydreams hatch into the best kind of nightmares within us all.

Reality is boring and needs to be spiced up sometimes. Some of us have the ability to retreat from it and some of us are stuck in math class forever. Some of us gain intense pleasure from being able to obsess over a theme or a series or a genre or a character, and some of us get pleasure from problem-solving and progress-having or whatever it is people do. Some of us have alternate personas we can pull out when we need to tackle a situation we're not comfortable with, and some of us just have the one version that they use for everything like a pair of worn work gloves.

This is how I live. This is my way of life. This is my work and my passion. My mind is my playground, my refuge, my asylum, the womb of my imagination and my nightmares, the source of my actions and choices. I've walked the halls of Hogwarts and loved and warred with the people within. I've died at the hands of a space-age dystopia in a metal coffin for treason. I've sailed a golden ship straight across the Andromeda galaxy and sought treasure where none have ever found it. I've met the man of my dreams over and over and over again, and loved him differently each time.

The dull pleasure and pain of reality is tired and taught. Fantasy is novel, fluid, and rapturous. To create, to design, to live vividly and in full color is my life's greatest gift. To share these visions with the rest of the world through language and storytelling is my greatest mission.

Woe unto those that condemn our dreams as nonsense. As impractical, as time-wasting, as adversely affecting our livelihoods. We daydreamers may live in a half-madness, but this is the real world. We're all mad here.
Couldn't have said it better myself.


And to the OP, I'd say yeah.
 

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I'm not an INFP and I don't experience it as much as some of you do - but a good chunk of my life was spent exactly like this. I don't do it as much anymore, and much of what others label as 'daydreaming' is really just pondering my thoughts, my future, my dreams, how I'd like it all to play out. It's not as magical or interesting as your daydreams ^^'

I did have a continuous daydream a few weeks ago where I was a historical figure (I do sort of believe in reincarnation and it was an idea that struck me like lightning). Point is, it was a comforting process and fun to imagine. My imagination works differently than it does to yours, but I couldn't live without it. It's as vital to me as, well, maybe not breathing but close. Giving that up is an impossibility for me and when I was told I had to, it felt like part of me was dying.

People like you, and me, I suppose, live and see things differently than many say you, we, should. It doesn't make either of us wrong, thinking and living the way we do, but I guess the difficult thing is to accept the idea that not everyone wants to or even CAN live without (day)dreaming.

Keep being you, guys. Dreamers are desperately needed, even if it's hard to go up against those who aren't.

Edit: I really relate to that Winona Ryder quote above.
 

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It's my only tool to survive in this world. :( Please don't pathologies it. There is a difference between daydreaming and 'actively living in a fantasyland'. Frequent daydreaming isn't the same as having something like HPD.
 

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Many people see daydreaming as escapism because they can't begin to understand the wonders that the mind can create. They themselves would resort to daydreaming when they are unhealthy and so they automatically assume that everyone else who does so must be unhealthy too.

Fi Introverts often get typed as unhealthy because the world tries to normalise Fe extraverts.

I'm a big daydreamer and it's honestly the biggest reason why I question if I'm an INFP not ENFP. I'm perfectly happy in my own head. Without those daydreams life would be mundane. If we exist to live life as it is and as we see it then why were we given beautiful imaginations?

I normally try to make use of my daydreams and put them into practice through roleplay or story writing and because of this I've had interventions from family on more than one occasion. They see it as a waste of time, something which consumes too much of my life and making me waste it. Honestly it does interfere with sleep and socialising. Maybe they were right to say I've gone too far and that it's unhealthy.

But to say that I'm wasting life..? Well I think it's my decision on how to use my life.
 

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Wow this got me thinking. I actually got scared for a while. I've never heard of Maladaptive Daydreaming. Like OP, I'm a hypochondriac, so whenever I read something about a disease or a disorder, I can convince myself that I have it. That there is definitely something wrong with me. So naturally I thought right away "omg I need help". But I stopped and thought about it.

Until now I never considered my daydreaming as something that disturbs my daily life. I mean, yes I tend to think about every situation in my mind and imagining different scenarios, which I know is not good. But I'm working on it. But when it comes to stories I develop in my head, I rather think that's an enrichment of reality. Mundane tasks can be really boring and my mind needs something to do as well when I'm performing manual tasks. Nothing wrong with that. I've never told anyone about this before, but when I'm watching films or reading books, I usually develop alternative plotlines with extra characters. I'm not even sure why. I just do it. even when I think the film is good, there is always something to add, or change. And it's not like I want to write fan-fiction about it. I don't actually like fan-fiction. I just like to add something although I know nobody else will know and use it. And this just enhances my experience and doesn't disturb anybody, so that's not a problem either.

I also never actually just sit and daydream. Maybe except when I'm on a train, listening to music and looking through a window. But usually it's during other stuff that I do in the real world. And before I go to sleep. But I ever thought that I need help so I guess this needs to be assessed individually. I don't think a psychologist can tell you if you have a problem. Like me and my hypochodria. This was clearly interfereing with my life. I could spend hours in the internet researching diseases and mortality statistics. And I recognized I needed help and now I'm a bit better. But I never actually thought "Damn, I can't cope with the daydreaming, I seriously need help".

There are certain behaviours that become norms if enough people believe them to be correct. That's why parents think it's bad when their children are quiet and don't have many friends. It's accepted as normal when children are full of energy and socializing. My parents thought that too and when I think about it now, it annoys me, but at least now I have the awareness so that I don't make the same mistakes with my children.

I'm glad to see that a lot of INFPs here agree that it doesn't have to be classified as a disorder. As long as we are comfortable with it, it's fine and it's an enrichment to the sometimes dull real world. I do agree though that this can be very addicting. But it's not doing any harm to our bodies and to other people (like smoking), unless you notice that it does interfere with your relationships. But I think that's up to individual assessment. Nobody can tell us to "socialize more" if we don't want it.
 

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There are certain behaviours that become norms if enough people believe them to be correct. That's why parents think it's bad when their children are quiet and don't have many friends. It's accepted as normal when children are full of energy and socializing. My parents thought that too and when I think about it now, it annoys me, but at least now I have the awareness so that I don't make the same mistakes with my children.
Reminds me of a quote by Anatole France:

Si 50 millions de personnes disent une bêtise, c'est quand même une bêtise.
Translates to: "If 50 million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

The trick isn't realizing that the thing is foolish to you, it is finding out why it is foolish and convincing the self of that why so that we can build something different, better, important, etc... And, if other seeks to argue your point, sometimes you may have to express that 'why'. 90% of the time, I find the best method to do this is through art, and I don't just mean painting, video, creative writing, etc, though those are certainly useful tools. I mean rhetoric, empathy, individual logical arguing and counter-arguing, listening, and so much more. It's bringing everything that you are to bare on the 'why' to the point that you may have to go somewhere away from those who consider pondering the 'why' to be a heavy offensive. That is an extremely attractive concept to me.

Note: The Norms that you are touching on, from a jungian point of view, also remind me of the clash between extraverted and extroverted Feeling (Fi vs Fe) or perhaps even the clash between extroversion and introversion and how they work. I think that perhaps you should consider exploring those concepts as you may find conversations about them to be very interesting. You don't have to, btw, ;p, just making an observation on what you wrote.
 
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