Personality Cafe banner

1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
7 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello, I just wanted to start this thread to get advice from everyone on a problem I'm having at work. I don't mind if you're from another Type--all opinions matter for this. Sorry this is such a long post.


Okay, so I'm not trying to brag but I am a hard worker when I'm at my job. I work retail. I do everything I'm supposed to do and then some. My sale percentages are usually the highest. I techniqully only have one to two jobs--helping customers and cashier duty. However, at our store people who work as cashiers usually help customers, clean, check fitting rooms, cashier, unwrap new merchandise, and put up clothing. People who are in the opening of the store do NOT have to do anything but greet customers, help them, and tidy the front. Basically I do many jobs. In fact I'm usually working so hard that frequently new people think I'm either the manager or assistant manager. I tell them I'm just an associate and they seem surprised. They still come to me for advice on job matters. Now because the employees (new and old) come to me I'm generally doing my multiple jobs while managing a staff of (at least) 5-8 people at one time. Again this is NOT part of my job description but I chose to do it:

1. because I don't want to see this people fired (I like them and think they're great workers given something to do)
2. because I like being nice and helpful
3. because I'm a perfectionist-hard-worker when it comes to my job.

My boss likes me but my assistant manager (AM) does not. I'm stuck with my AM most times. I do everything he asks of me but that's never enough. If I'm doing good he gets tight and annoyed OR he makes sure I do even more work. If I make a mistake he points it out in front of everyone and makes sure I feel like an idiot and/or "punishes" me (that's what I call it) by making me do extra work on top of what I already have to do. And if I don't do any of it quick enough he gets an attitude with me and belittles me more. Half of the time the stuff he needs me to do can be done by multiple people (such as cleaning floors, tidying up, etc.) but he tells them "no," that I need to do it. Or he conviently tasks them to other meaningless things so they stay busy while I do the brunt work.

He usually assigns employees that are his friends to work front with him so they can talk and be together. I'm not saying he doesn't do his job--he does. But many times I'll catch that group just standing there talking, not greeting customers as they come it. (I had one of our employees ask me why "they're not doing anything?" I told him that the group "must be having an off day" because I don't like bad-mouthing people). Many times the other employees and I will go up to the front and find that part of the store dirty so we'll start doing those jobs just to make the store functional. Then when I'm busy doing other people's jobs and a customer needs help my AM will go "Hey you need to get up there and help those people," or "why aren't you back there like you're supposed to be?" Uh, because I'm taking back items like you asked me to and noticed this mess that you have failed to clean up despite the fact there's been no one in the store for an hour? <--that's what I want to say but I just nod and go "okay!" and run to do my "other" job. He doesn't do this to any of the other employees--just me.

In all honesty, I don't mind working harder than everyone else. I know that sounds stupid but I just don't care. I'm going to work harder than everyone anyway so why not? I enjoy it knowing I can get more done quicker and with better quality than most in my work-place. What bothers me is his "jabs" and "stabs," those little digs of "Is this done yet?" after I've only been doing it for 10 minutes and it normally takes a normal person 30 to complete. Then when I say, "no not yet" he says "well you really need to hurry up. It shouldn't take you this long!" And what REALLY annoys me is that no one notices. NO ONE. I'm not making this crap up, I know I'm not. He's just really good at making digs sound normal. Like to anyone else it sounds normal but he gives me that look and that tone and that attitude and I know. I mean, I KNOW what he really means. He makes it VERY clear.

I've tried to give him mental passes. Maybe he's in a fight with his girlfriend. Maybe he's stressed out. Maybe this. Maybe that. Maybe I could have done better. Maybe EVERYTHING. I stay nice and respectful despite how rude he is to me. But to be honest many people go to work and don't take their crap with them. If they can do I know he can. It's a choice plain and simple. So there's no excuse. I confronted him about his behavior one time (privately) and he said he just gets annoyed sometimes in general. He never did apologize for his actions--just seemed to use that as an excuse. After that he just avoided me for a while. But now he's back to his old "annoyed" self and I'm done. For someone who gets annoyed "in general" he sure does take it out on ONLY me. I can't tell my boss--she's friends with him. There is no HR. And I am NOT confronting my AM because I'm done with dealing with him. I've stayed nice and respectful. I've confronted him before. I've worked harder. I've even called him out publicly once just to let him know that his behavior wasn't going to fly.

What concerns me most is this exact thing is happening (but on a much crazier level) to an uncle of mine who is also a hard-worker and I've seen the stress he goes through. As mean as this may sound I don't want to be like him--I don't want to get trampled on and have no way out. I don't want to just take it. I can't anymore. I refuse to be a victim. I need to fight this and deal with this head on. I need to know how to deal with this and win. I don't want this family curse to fall on my head as well.

How can I deal with this situation? Has anyone dealt with this before? Am I doing something wrong here? I'm willing to change if it will make the situation better. Please help. I never let things bother me and I'm very easy-going. But now when I walk into work I'm stressed when I see my AM. I had to take a 15 min.break the other day (something I never do) just to calm myself down. I like my job, I like my co-workers, I even like my AM when he's nice. But he just seems to have this vendetta against me and for the life of me I can't figure out why or how to fix it. I only get paid 8 an hour and I can't go anywhere else at the moment. This is the only job that will give me flexible hours and pretty good pay.

Help?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,022 Posts
Probably self-esteem issues. I have run into the "worship me or GTFO" supervisors before. It's not you, it's them, trust me. They will never progress much past their supervisor roles because they suck and life and they need to have you hate yours too, if you don't. The only advice I have is to either develop awfully thick skin, or conform with the group.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Farmboy

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,684 Posts
Honestly, you're probably showing him up. If he's standing up in the front and things aren't getting done, just leave them. I know it's hard, but that's how you make enemies. If someone isn't doing their job let them get in trouble and let people complain to the manager because the more you do things and try to take control the more he will continue to do this. Apologize for being so perfect and then just do what you're told unless he's not watching. Then do whatever.

I know I'm making it seem like you're at fault, you're not, but if you want things to change this is what you have to do. Play into the hierarchy, know your role, and use it to your advantage. Yes, things may not always be clean, but it's a retail job and if they're assistant manager they probably have less to look forward to in life. Otherwise I would get used to it and take everything in stride. Honestly, if it's only one person who treats you like that then consider yourself lucky.

Of course, some people just rub others the wrong way. I know there are people who mean well when they're around me, but for some reason I just can't stand them. I'd do my best not to be a bitch if I worked with them, but not everyone is that considerate. Who knows, maybe he's picking up the frustration from you and it's just this cycle that both of you are creating.
 

·
QUEEN PEEN
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
AM feels threatened... that's my guess. Honestly, I would say that the actual manager thinks he's getting off easy by giving you smaller pay and making you do extra work. I think it's about time you raised hell and demanded either a raise or a promotion. Let them know you're not happy. When the best worker starts to slide, people do notice that something is wrong, and if you've proven yourself like you say you have, they won't want to lose you and will give you what you want as best as they can. I've done this a few times, and it always pays off.
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top