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Might be more of vent, related to current events rather than sex and relationships.

Rebecca Helen Elder accused of raping man after breaking into his house to stand trial | Mail Online

A woman who broke into a guys house and gave him fellatio while he slept. The guy woke up, and now she's facing charges. So far so good. The problem wasn't the story itself. The problem was that the guy sent it to me did so because it's funny, and other comments I've read since on it. What a ludicrous story it is, that it's not possible for a man to be raped by a woman, that you have to be a weiner to go and complain about a free blow job, that if you're "not down for fucks with slutkind you're not a real person".

Whenever the topic comes up of men raped by women, or boys even, what you're most likely to see amonst men in particular is the worst kind of victim-shaming rape-apologia, good examples of how men have their experiences invalidated because they're not "good victims", how in the realm of sex they're often considered like animals more than people, always up for it, and how women are seen as non-threatening children that couldn't possibly take advantage or even be a threat. It's a pretty fucking insulting all around.

A lot of women have rape fantasies, but should they then get actually raped we don't make light of that, because we have an understanding that a fantasy and the reality of forced sexual contact are two fundamentally different things. How can it be so hard to wrap your head around the fact that the same applies to men? A guy might fantasize about a surprise blowjob, but waking up in the middle of the night with a stranger in your bed that nonconsensually is taking sexual liberties is not the same thing as that fantasy.

My point is this. Men can be raped by women, men have a right to sexual self determination, the right to say no, too, their traumas are also real, and that this doesn't make them lesser than, less man, and while maybe it's not the case for some out there that find this kind of stuff hilarious, many men, and boys, are more than just a life support systems for indifferentiating cocks.

That is all.
 

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It's disgusting that firstly, men are seen as sex-obsessed neanderthals who will never refuse sex and secondly, that any rape victim is less of a victim than another rape victim.

You hear stories of female teachers who rape male minors and then the minor gets congratulated for sleeping with an adult woman, and he doesn't get the help and treatment he needs as a victim of a terrible ordeal. You hear of the Russian woman who enslaved a burglar for three days and forced him into sexual slavery, and then she got all huffy because he dared go to the police about it. You hear about a Norwegian man who pressed charges against a woman who raped him whilst he was asleep on a couch, and idiots comment on the story saying that he should have considered himself lucky, and that he wasn't a real man for pressing charges.

No means no, and that applies to every single human being regardless of biology or identity.
 

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I think a lot of it has to do with the idea that "penetration" is the only culturally considered form of violation. If you are able to penetrate, then you are able to rape. If you can't penetrate then you are harmless*






*generally speaking


edit: in addition, i think sexual power is given to penetrators. and that is sexist. or genderist. wahtever. i would say that a woman could just as easily sexually manipulate a man as a man could a woman.
 

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Funny story, but yeah, I'd be pretty freaked out if I knew somebody had broken into my hom while I slept and was in a position to literally bite my penis off, because let's face it, even if the BJ was the best on earth, who wouldn't question the sanity of such a person, and who would dare to tell her to F off, while she has you in such a hmm.. precarious postition? nobody that wants to avoid massive pain, so yeah, it's legally rape.
 

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Funny story
How is it funny?

but yeah, I'd be pretty freaked out if I knew somebody had broken into my hom while I slept and was in a position to literally bite my penis off, because let's face it, even if the BJ was the best on earth, who wouldn't question the sanity of such a person, and who would dare to tell her to F off, while she has you in such a hmm.. precarious postition? nobody that wants to avoid massive pain, so yeah, it's legally rape.
I get the impression that you don't really see it as rape, or that male rape victims aren't really victims at all. Am I wrong with this impression?
 

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How is it funny?



I get the impression that you don't really see it as rape, or that male rape victims aren't really victims at all. Am I wrong with this impression?

All wrong indeed, please re-read the post slowly, and realize no moral crusade is needed here....

Funny as in rare, bizarre
 

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Okay, so she stopped as soon as he woke up? If she was a totally random stanger then I can see how this would be scary. If they knew each other and were on friendly terms than I'd say she's just a really kinky girl who made a mistake in an attempt to get an exciting fuck. I don't see how the experience would be tramatic or damaging for him. If I was him and I didn't want the sex to happen I would have just yelled at her and told her to go away. If that didn't work and/or she is a stalker then I would call the police.

If they were on friendly terms and she's just uber kinky, I feel bad for her. If she's a scary stalker, I don't feel so bad for her.

In another life under difference cirumstances (I'm happily married), I would let the kinky girl blow me and then I would fuck her brains out.
 

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anyone who breaks into my house is going to die. if she wants me to penetrate her vagina so bad, I'll happily oblige...with a knife
 

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anyone who breaks into my house is going to die. if she wants me to penetrate her vagina so bad, I'll happily oblige...with a knife
um that's kinda gross dude.
 

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All wrong indeed, please re-read the post slowly, and realize no moral crusade is needed here....
Fair enough, although "moral crusade" is laughable. Is that what you think I'm doing?

Funny as in rare, bizarre
Then why not say rare or bizarre? Surely you would have been aware that people might misunderstand your describing the story as funny?
 

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um that's kinda gross dude.
lol I'm a perverted bastard, get used to it
as gross as a woman breaking into my house and trying to rape me? opportunities to kill someone in self defense are usually few and far between, so if I ever get one, might as well be creative with it.
 

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Then why not say rare or bizarre? Surely you would have been aware that people might misunderstand your describing the story as funny?
no seriously me and my husband fight about that word all the time. he always thinks of "funny" as in "haha" and i use it to mean, odd, unusual, humorous, off, strange, or haha.
 

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lol I'm a perverted bastard, get used to it
as gross as a woman breaking into my house and trying to rape me? opportunities to kill someone in self defense are usually few and far between, so if I ever get one, might as well be creative with it.
get used to violent sodomy? no thanks. however, i will accept your dark streak.

is killing in self-defense justifiable in a rape situation? Just curious in terms of the law. but maybe that's a question for another thread.
 
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Okay, so she stopped as soon as he woke up? If she was a totally random stanger then I can see how this would be scary.
Why does her being a stranger make it any less scary for the man?

If they knew each other and were on friendly terms than I'd say she's just a really kinky girl who made a mistake in an attempt to get an exciting fuck.
Wrong. She's an alleged rapist. Don't make excuses for her simply because she's female.

I don't see how the experience would be tramatic or damaging for him.
Really? You don't see how rape could be traumatic or damaging to him? What if the sexes were reversed?

If I was him and I didn't want the sex to happen I would have just yelled at her and told her to go away.
Yes, because that would have worked. What if she had a weapon, or what if he was frozen in terror, which often happens when someone is being raped?

If that didn't work and/or she is a stalker then I would call the police.
Again, what if she had a weapon or he froze?

If they were on friendly terms and she's just uber kinky, I feel bad for her
.

Shouldn't you be feeling bad for the man who was raped?

If she's a scary stalker, I don't feel so bad for her.
Oh, of course, because when it's not to the man's liking, then it would be rape then, wouldn't it? After all, 99% of the time, men love sex and would never turn down being forced into sex by a stranger.

In another life under difference cirumstances (I'm happily married)
Doesn't sound like it, the way you're describing this woman.

I would let the kinky girl blow me and then I would fuck her brains out.
Of course, because the world is a sleazy porno, and the man wasn't really raped, and she isn't an alleged rapist and burglar.
 

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Fair enough, although "moral crusade" is laughable. Is that what you think I'm doing?



Then why not say rare or bizarre? Surely you would have been aware that people might misunderstand your describing the story as funny?
1. Clearly not laughable, you're just trying to pick some sort of fight here, over anything you can.

2. Because I assumed people would read the entire post?

3. What I'm aware of is that people will start moral crusades and pick fights over just any menial thing.

Don't intend on being rude, there's just nothing to explore or uncover here, can you just like, move on?
 

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no seriously me and my husband fight about that word all the time. he always thinks of "funny" as in "haha" and i use it to mean, odd, unusual, humorous, off, strange, or haha.
Fair enough, although it sounded wierd being used in the way he used it.
 

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get used to violent sodomy? no thanks. however, i will accept your dark streak.
is killing in self-defense justifiable in a rape situation? Just curious in terms of the law. but maybe that's a question for another thread.
I believe I have the right to kill someone who
- tries to rape me
- breaks into my house (from the time they enter to the time they escape)
- murders a family member of mine

that said, none of these things are legal, unfortunately, so I probably wouldn't, I'm just saying I wouldn't feel any remorse and probably would if I knew I could get away with it (to appease my E7 curiosity)
 
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